The Funny Side of Religion

Sulla Felix

endacl wrote: »

Football. Another weird irrational cult I just don't get...

Me either. Everyone knows the ball is supposed to be egg-shaped and that it's sacredness should be literally held to the bosom.

Anyway, repost? I don't think I've seen it on here at least.

endacl

Sulla Felix wrote: »

Me either. Everyone knows the ball is supposed to be egg-shaped and that it's sacredness should be literally held to the bosom.

Oh, I don't mind the game at all! Just the weird irrational cultiness of all that surrounds it...

periodictable

Not sure if this has been posted

Gbear

endacl wrote: »

Oh, I don't mind the game at all! Just the weird irrational cultiness of all that surrounds it...

It wouldn't be much fun if it was rational.

It takes the role of fantasy and irrationality in my life but without prescribing any moral code or stopping me from eating tasty pigs.

Sulla Felix

endacl wrote: »

Oh, I don't mind the game at all! Just the weird irrational cultiness of all that surrounds it...

Oh, I do. Just find it boring to watch. :pac: Always thought it'd be much more interesting if there were no goalies.

Nolars

Now lads stop bad mouthing the beautiful game

endacl

Sulla Felix wrote: »

Oh, I do. Just find it boring to watch. :pac: Always thought it'd be much more interesting if there were no goalies.

No. Four teams. Perfectly square pitch. And no referee. I'd watch that.

endacl

Nolars wrote: »

Now lads stop bad mouthing the beautiful game

We're not bad mouthing it. Now we're improving it!

Worztron

AstraMonti

I know a lot of you don't like him.. but I do

robindch

Jesus, aged 47, and Mary, aged 32, show up in Australia. As the couple may not be telling the truth, a protestant bishop warns people to be careful:

Phillip Aspinall wrote:

"This is especially true for people who are seeking meaning in their lives and, as a result, may be vulnerable,"

...he explained without any trace of irony.

http://www.adelaidenow.com.au/news/south-australia/im-jesus-riverland-man-says/story-e6frea83-1226055976446

Adelaide Now wrote:

A COUPLE who say they are Jesus Christ and Mary Magdalene have set up base in Queensland's Bible Belt.

The pair, real names Alan John Miller, who once lived in Loxton in South Australia's Riverland, and Mary Suzanne Luck, operate from rural Wilkesdale near Kingaroy, where they have been joined by an increasing band of followers. "My name is Jesus, and I'm serious," Miller said in a video recording from one workshop. Cult watchers and the Anglican and Catholic churches are alarmed the pair, who ask followers to make donations to sustain them, could draw in the vulnerable.

Miller bought a 16ha property at Wilkesdale in 2007 and his Divine Truth followers have since been buying nearby blocks to be close to the charismatic leader, 47, and alluring Luck, 32. Locals and real estate agents confirmed the group had sparked an unlikely property boom, with estimates they have bought up to 30 blocks and with new properties in high demand. Followers joined forces in 2009 to buy a $400,000, 240ha property where they hold weekly meetings and plan to build a centre catering for international visitors.

In a bizarre coincidence, land clearing has created a giant cross on neighbouring properties that can be seen from space using Google Maps. Local residents insisted it was not carved deliberately. Police are said to have been called to investigate screams in the area, only to discover members taking part in a healing exercise where they shout to help process "past soul damage" and ill feelings. Some residents complain they are being driven out of the quiet hamlet by the group, which resembles Debra Geileskey's Magnificat Meal Movement that drew scores of followers to Helidon near Toowoomba.

Queensland has a tradition of fostering fringe religious movements. Fugitive killer Luke Andrew Hunter was recaptured in February after 15 years on the run in which he hid out with the separate Jesus Group in the state's far north. Concerned relatives and friends have been contacting the Cult Awareness and Information Centre to warn of Divine Truth followers selling family homes to move to Wilkesdale.

Centre spokeswoman Helen Pomery said: "The moment someone becomes God or God's voice on Earth it gives them another level of authority to enforce submission to them." Anglican Archbishop Dr Phillip Aspinall and the Catholic church, unaware of the group until contacted by the Sunday Mail, urged people to be cautious when exploring new movements. "This is especially true for people who are seeking meaning in their lives and, as a result, may be vulnerable," Dr Aspinall said.

Mr Miller was born in Loxton and has two children from a previous marriage, which he says ended after he "began to remember details" of his past life. Tailoring his appearance to look like Jesus, he yesterday held a workshop in Albury, New South Wales, where he stood by his claims and said at least "30 or 40" people had bought blocks around Wilkesdale. "Mary and myself haven't ever encouraged people to move out there. Some of the people we don't even know," he said.

In one recording he said: "There's probably a million people who say they're Jesus and most of them are in asylums. But one of us has to be. How do I know I am? Because I remember everything about my life."

Mr. CooL ICE

My name is Jesus, and I'm serious

He says he is serious, so I guess it's true

Penn

...the Anglican and Catholic churches are alarmed the pair, who ask followers to make donations to sustain them, could draw in the vulnerable.

IRONY EXPLOSION!

G.K.

endacl wrote: »

Football. Another weird irrational cult I just don't get...

Sulla Felix wrote: »

Me either. Everyone knows the ball is supposed to be egg-shaped and that it's sacredness should be literally held to the bosom.

endacl wrote: »

Oh, I don't mind the game at all! Just the weird irrational cultiness of all that surrounds it...

Sulla Felix wrote: »

Oh, I do. Just find it boring to watch. :pac: Always thought it'd be much more interesting if there were no goalies.

You're mad, the lot of you. Not that I'm biased or anything. *whistles*

Delirium

endacl wrote: »

Football. Another weird irrational cult I just don't get...

G.K. wrote: »

You're mad, the lot of you. Not that I'm biased or anything. *whistles*

Remind me, what are the code words to gain access to the Soccerball forum? :P:pac:

Bannasidhe

G.K. wrote: »

You're mad, the lot of you. Not that I'm biased or anything. *whistles*

Told OH she could watch the match last night...didn't know it was on Setanta...we don't have Setanta...oops. It was well over before she discovered it was also on ITV - damn those 'other channels' on Sky with their no listing on the guide.

win-win for me. Kudos points for saying I'd mind if you watch the match and then I didn't have to watch the match.

Genghiz Cohen

koth wrote: »

Remind me, what are the code words to gain access to the Soccerball forum? :P:pac:

You just have to know that the Multi-Ball starts in the 3rd Quarter.

Turtwig

G.K. wrote: »

You're mad, the lot of you. Not that I'm biased or anything. *whistles*

I can ban them if you'd like. :pac:

MrPudding

Genghiz Cohen wrote: »

You just have to know that the Multi-Ball starts in the 3rd Quarter.

Hmmm, this does not match information I have received previously. In additional to it being "a funny old game", I was under the impression that it was also a "game of two halfs".

MrP

seamus

Anglican Archbishop Dr Phillip Aspinall and the Catholic church [...] urged people to be cautious when exploring new movements. "This is especially true for people who are seeking meaning in their lives and, as a result, may be vulnerable," Dr Aspinall said.

Comedy gold.

Although I was expecting to read that he started "remembering" his past life after a trip to Jerusalem or after losing his job or something.

On doing some digging, he's a former property developer, and now there's a property boom in the surrounding area. Hmm...

Nolars

wonderfulname

MrPudding wrote: »

Hmmm, this does not match information I have received previously. In additional to it being "a funny old game", I was under the impression that it was also a "game of two halfs".

MrP

But is two halves not four quarters? Big fan of fractions, those football types...

kiffer

MrPudding wrote: »

Hmmm, this does not match information I have received previously. In additional to it being "a funny old game", I was under the impression that it was also a "game of two halfs".

MrP

2/2 == 4/4
It's also a game of two sets of eight 16ths... or two sets of 45 90ths...
Maths!

Worztron

joseph brand

robindch wrote: »

Jesus, aged 47, and Mary, aged 32, show up in Australia. As the couple may not be telling the truth, a protestant bishop warns people to be careful:...he explained without any trace of irony.

http://www.adelaidenow.com.au/news/south-australia/im-jesus-riverland-man-says/story-e6frea83-1226055976446

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=abOI3MToWn8

NOT The Onion!

Hotblack Desiato

Worztron wrote: »

Jesus saves. Rationalists save, then make at least two backups, and keep one off-site.

Kivaro

joseph brand wrote: »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=abOI3MToWn8

NOT The Onion!

Ah, I see.
A former IT Specialist.

Don't they all think they're god?

joseph brand

Kivaro wrote: »

Ah, I see.
A former IT Specialist.

Don't they all think they're god?

They all think they're 'It'.

joseph brand

Hotblack Desiato

Kivaro wrote: »

Ah, I see.
A former IT Specialist.

Don't they all think they're god?

No, just the domain administrator :rolleyes:

But shure wasn't Jesus the original proxy server. No-one can access the lord's salvation sites except through me.