The Funny Side of Religion

Worztron

Worztron

robindch

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/celebrity/pope-john-paul-ii-'completed-jet-set-willy'-2013062172991

The Daily Mash wrote:

THE former Pope’s mystery-shrouded miracle was completing an impossible computer game in the 80s, it has emerged.

The Vatican revealed a ZX Spectrum-based feat as the basis for ex-Pope John Paul II’s planned sainthood. A Vatican spokesman said: “Anyone who remembers the popular platform game Jet Set Willy knows that it was impossible.

“Not only was the collision detection a bitch, but there was a bug that meant if you went in a certain room you instantly died. “But in 1985 John Paul II locked himself in his chambers for 4 days without meal breaks, emerging to say ‘Ive nailed it’.”

Catholic former Spectrum owner Stephen Malley said: “Jet Set Willy was ridiculously hard. When I think about how many times the former Pope must have died and gone back to the start, rather like Christ himself, it is quite inspiring. “But to justify a sainthood I’d also want the Pope to have completed its prequel Manic Miner, which didn’t have as many rooms but was still very frustrating.”

The Vatican spokesman confirmed that John Paul II did complete Manic Miner, as well as Spectrum classics Chuckie Egg, Knightlore and School Daze. He added: “Without pokes too, if anyone remembers what a poke is.”

BTW, does anybody remember what a poke was in the days before facebook took over the term?

recedite

I bought a pig in a poke once.

Obliq

I've been in plenty of pokes


(but apparently I haven't - can't find a definition for what I thought it meant once - ie. a tight spot or a dilemma)

robindch

Obliq wrote: »

[...] can't find a definition [...]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PEEK_and_POKE

Pokes were hot stuff at one time

Obliq

Oooh! And here was me going back to middle-english...:o

Sarky

I've performed a few pokes in my time.

Bannasidhe

Obliq wrote: »

Oooh! And here was me going back to middle-english...:o

You can take the woman out of The Shire but you can't take The Shire out of the woman...:P

Links234

I don't know if there's many Venture Bros. fans here, but the most recent episode featured a flashback scene where the great Jonas Venture Sr. and the original Team Venture fight a robotic L. Ron Hubbard

kylith

robindch wrote: »

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/celebrity/pope-john-paul-ii-'completed-jet-set-willy'-2013062172991

BTW, does anybody remember what a poke was in the days before facebook took over the term?

A paper bag, I think. I think I came across it in a Brookmeyer book as 'a poke of chips'.

Bannasidhe

kylith wrote: »

A paper bag, I think. I think I came across it in a Brookmeyer book as 'a poke of chips'.

My mother was a great woman for the pokes in the pre-tubberware days. She would take a piece of paper (size depended on what size poke she wanted) and make it into a cone shape. Put what ever into the cone and then twist the ends.

extra gravy

robindch

Holymarymotherofgod shows up in Manchester:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-23029507

Turtwig

robindch wrote: »

Holymarymotherofgod shows up in Manchester:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-23029507

Hah! Take that you Christian Pansies. Osiris is real!

Worztron

Gordon

kylith wrote: »

A paper bag, I think. I think I came across it in a Brookmeyer book as 'a poke of chips'.

Indeed, I think it predates the PEEK/POKE definition, a 'poke' of chips is still terminology in Glasgow, and maybe other Scottish cities. A bit outdated though. Brookmyre rocks

Gilbert Grape

http://youtu.be/gPOfurmrjxo

Worztron

kylith

robindch wrote: »

Holymarymotherofgod shows up in Manchester:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-23029507

Brilliant!

I can't listen to the video because I'm in work. Did they give an explanation? I reckon it's a combination of an unevenness in the base and vibrations from people walking by.

AstraMonti

robindch wrote: »

Holymarymotherofgod shows up in Manchester:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-23029507

Sales are a bit low lately, aren't they? :pac:

magicbastarder

it hasn't been moved by human hands for more than 80 years, despite being in a cabinet which seems to be maybe five or ten years old?

coffee_cake

They held it through a cloth, obv :pac:

Bannasidhe

bluewolf wrote: »

They held it through a cloth, obv :pac:

Or with gloves on and using a trolley as per instructions issued on every manual lifting course I have ever been on.

endacl

Bannasidhe wrote: »

Or with gloves on and using a trolley as per instructions issued on every manual lifting course I have ever been on.

Back straight, knees bent....

Do I get academic credits for this?!?

Penn

"Lift with your legs"
"I think it's better if I use my arms"

magicbastarder

if you ask me, it looks like a primitive dildo anyway. maybe it's a vibrator.

Bannasidhe

endacl wrote: »

Back straight, knees bent....

Do I get academic credits for this?!?

Like academics lift anything heavier than a G&T *snort*.

endacl

Bannasidhe wrote: »

Like academics lift anything heavier than a G&T *snort*.

With straight back and bent legs?

Bannasidhe

endacl wrote: »

With straight back and bent legs?

Depends on the chair.