The Funny Side of Religion

Stercus Accidit

Pro-tip: read the comandments, I didn't get it straight away

robindch

GLaDOS

sponsoredwalk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w1xBSHk5_a4

Turtwig

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S6_9QmM6TfE

Turtwig

"If the scientific community didn't recognize the possibility of faith healing, why would they include placebo's in drug trials?"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTUon6st8N0

vibe666

Bananas? yes, i do believe so!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4yBvvGi_2A

Dades

A few snippets from this posted before but not all:



More here:

http://stvrly.wordpress.com/2010/09/22/if-facebook-existed-years-ago/

Galvasean

Galvasean

vibe666 wrote: »

Bananas? yes, i do believe so!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4yBvvGi_2A

Canis Lupus

Malty_T wrote: »

"If the scientific community didn't recognize the possibility of faith healing, why would they include placebo's in drug trials?"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTUon6st8N0

DIE IN HELL MORON! lol

Wacker

cypharius

Ghost Buster

Help!!! Im a theatre teccie by trade and at the moment Im lighting and sound checking for Liam Lawton. He has a miniture altar on stage and every time I do anything for him or his band I get a 'God Bless you'.... Would it be unprofessional of me to drop a 250 Kg lighting bar on him?;)
Is this sort of work a violation of my religious disbeliefs?

Turtwig

Ghost Buster wrote: »

Help!!! Im a theatre teccie by trade and at the moment Im lighting and sound checking for Liam Lawton. He has a miniture altar on stage and every time I do anything for him or his band I get a 'God Bless you'.... Would it be unprofessional of me to drop a 250 Kg lighting bar on him?;)
Is this sort of work a violation of my religious disbeliefs?

Aww rats, it was only when I quoted your post my brain told me that you weren't a theatre trekkie.:(

legspin

Ghost Buster wrote: »

Help!!! Im a theatre teccie by trade and at the moment Im lighting and sound checking for Liam Lawton. He has a miniture altar on stage and every time I do anything for him or his band I get a 'God Bless you'.... Would it be unprofessional of me to drop a 250 Kg lighting bar on him?;)
Is this sort of work a violation of my religious disbeliefs?

An entire lx bar might be a bit too obvious. A single profile or two parr cans looks less suspicious.

Are you on tour with him or in-house? If you're house just make his life as uncomfortable as you can, eg. a bit too much 4 khz in his wedges or stick a really harsh gel on his spot, metallica green or some such.

I feel your pain though, having had to work in a similar capacity at various awful god love-ins over the years.

Ghost Buster

legspin wrote: »

An entire lx bar might be a bit too obvious. A single profile or two parr cans looks less suspicious.

Are you on tour with him or in-house? If you're house just make his life as uncomfortable as you can, eg. a bit too much 4 khz in his wedges or stick a really harsh gel on his spot, metallica green or some such.

I feel your pain though, having had to work in a similar capacity at various awful god love-ins over the years.

Im in house and far to professional for such shenannigins dahling!!. I just did the auld fire regs thing on him and wouldnt let him light his 8 candles on stage!:cool:

mehfesto

sensibleken

mehfesto wrote: »

I like the sex offenders in church reference at the bottom. must be an interview or profile

Pygmalion

sensibleken wrote: »

I like the sex offenders in church reference at the bottom. must be an interview or profile

I don't like the implication that they're "liberating Paul".

sensibleken

Pygmalion wrote: »

I don't like the implication that they're "liberating Paul".

and they made pauls brother cry

Dades

^^ Looks like Jesus just went to see Avatar.

You still have your 3D specs on, Jesus!

Blank_

Banana man (aka Ray Comfort) is giving away for free his latest book How to Know God Exists (with scientific proof of God ) to atheists via this link:

http://raycomfortfood.blogspot.com/2010/09/free-book-for-atheists.html

Also included a Trillion Dollars bill to spend in Hell

sonicthebadger*

They are the worst sunglasses I've seen since 1987.

sponsoredwalk

Blank_ wrote: »

Banana man (aka Ray Comfort) is giving away for free his latest book How to Know God Exists (with scientific proof of God :pac:) to atheists via this link:

http://raycomfortfood.blogspot.com/2010/09/free-book-for-atheists.html

Also included a Trillion Dollars bill to spend in Hell :pac:

Sent! Winter is coming :pac:

Dades

sponsoredwalk wrote: »

Winter is coming :pac:

*whispers* Valar morghulis...

monosharp

Dades wrote: »

*whispers* Valar morghulis...

Damn both of you! I've been trying so hard to forget about waiting for A) the new book and the new HBO show.

pljudge321

Dades wrote: »

*whispers* Valar morghulis...

Valar Dohaeris


It will be one of the greatest crimes in literary history if those books don't get completed.

housetypeb

Sorry if this has been posted before

Laura Schlesinger is a US radio personality, who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. She recently said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination, according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstances. The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura which was posted on the Internet.
Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination... End of debate.
I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to follow them.
1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is, my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath.Exodus 35:2. clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?
6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?
7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle- room here?
8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?
9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16.
Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
Your adoring fan,
Homer Simpson-Caldwell

amacachi

First time I've seen it. :pac: