I like transexual girls, but im a bit confused

Kazobel

Rev Hellfire wrote:

The idea that this is form of exploitation is the sole preserve of the Trans community is beyond laughable.
Where it applies to you it is targeted at minority audience.
Women on the whole have to deal with it daily from the mainstream media; you need look no further than covers of computer and car magazines, tabloid newspapers and the top shelf in the newsagents.

I never said it was the sole preserve of the trans community to be treated as sex objects but the difference is you's are also treated as people we're always treated as sextoys, to them we're nothing. They don't want to know the person, the personallity, they have no intrest in our likes or dislikes, our ambitions hell even wether we can string two words together. All they want is to shag us and as such deserve as much respect from us as they give which is none. They call themselves "Admirers" but the way they treat us is anything but admiration, at most it's contempt. If they dehumanise us we have every right to do the same to them and as such most of us see them as nothing and never get involved with them no-matter how hard they try. I personally think they are all the spawn of Satan and am well known for treating them like crap at every opportunity ( http://www.gaire.com/e/b/article.asp?id=2185&f=y ) because thats all they do to us.

Boston

That makes you a victim. You're giving someone control over you by trying to treat them in a way similar to how you're being treated or others you know are being treated. If someone wants to be in a submissive dehumanising relationship that's their choice, if you don't that's your choice as well.

Kazobel

But my point is it's never a "relationship", the last thing from their mind is a relationship. All they want is NSA, secretive, tacky sex. We're nothing to them so they're nothing to us. I'm a victim to no-one, not one of them has ever bedded me and not one ever will.

Boston

Kazobel wrote:

But my point is it's never a "relationship", the last thing from their mind is a relationship. All they want is NSA, secretive, tacky sex. We're nothing to them so they're nothing to us. I'm a victim to no-one, not one of them has ever bedded me and not one ever will.

Sweeping generalised statement. Believe it if you want and choose your partners accordingly, thats your right, but you've no insight into someone elses relationships.

You are in a victim because you've allowed the things that other people do to have a large impact on how you deal with people. They've had a strong affect on you and as such have a degree of power over how you live your life.

teemm

Like Kazobel and LousieVB, I see myself...I am a m2f transexual or whatever the current term is. Point is, like them I essentially have a female mind but a male body. Like any woman I prefer sex within a loving relationship or to at least like the person.

That is the essential problem, men looking for sex or an 'experience' with a TS are exactly the sort of men a TS does not want to meet. Transvestites that's different. They're men playing at being a woman and it is my belief that there is no such thing as a heterosexual transvestite or else it is rare. That's what they tell their wives but in my experience most are at least bi.

Before I sorted myself out in my own mind. (Believe me being TS is not easy and I labelled myself as all sorts over the years before I simply listened to my own heart.) I met up with several men for sex, although I was hoping for more:rolleyes: Of the men I met 75% were married and saw themselves as straight or at least bi. Of all the men only two were gay as such and I presented as a man for them although I ruined it for the only decent guy I met by dressing as a woman thus putting him off. He ran like hell, don't blame him.

The others were typical men, full of the old chat until they got what they wanted. I remember sitting on my couch after one left, slightly drunk with smeared lipstick and a bad taste in mouth:( thinking I really ought to have asked for money from him. I was in effect an unpaid prostitute. It was the same every time with the straight guys. They either never called again or rang months later expecting a repeat performance. Of course silly b that I am I fell for it once again.

I'm not bitter about it, not my nature. Some do. I'm a optimist by nature and don't believe in getting all worked up about it. That's just men. I'm a bit of a Paris Hilton, never seem to learn my lesson;) It really irritates me sometimes when you watch programmes about TS's. It's almost compulsory to have a big sad tale to tell. On ther other hand the suicide rate is quite high. I for one have stood on the parapet once or twice. In the end the thought of ruining my shoes stopped me;) Oh I could have left them on the bridge but then some other b would get them.:p

I have no problem with the Iliketgirls or others like him. Their best bet in Ireland, is a convincing trannie or drag queen or indeed pay a pro. Obviously though they want someone just like in the porn sites with breasts and a dick. The 'shemale'. Some have no intention of getting surgery others do it to pay for the surgery. In a way those porn sites give guys an unrealistic idea of what they can get. My goodness some of them are stunning and I am really jealous.

Those of us in Ireland are as often as not, good Catholic girls at heart. I for one would like nothing better than a full church wedding with the dress and all the trimmings including a lovely man. I'd even settle for a bridesmaids role. 'sigh'.

Anyway that's my slant on it.

Louisevb

Teemm,
A very interesting reply.... We all have made the porn video on this one. I think the one thing that you left out and maybe you haven't thought too much about this and that is that self esteem is important in this senario. You can have as many men as you want, but the next day, what do you feel?.. used , abused and generally not the sort of thing that you want... I'd say appreciate yourself more and don't take the first man that spins you a yarn... look for friendship and other things first before going near a bed room with any man.
Take care
Louise

Boston

Question: Who, with regards to sexuality, do you see yourself as being suited to? I remember being told that most TS people generally stick to other TS people as they generally can see past the labels to to the person, but would m2f TS prefere to be going out with straight guys, since in essense you view yourselves as women and seemingly straight yourselves.

Rev Hellfire

The thing here and I admit I may be missing something something fundamental here is that I can't see anything special here. Every night of the week people go out looking for a partner for a lasting relationship and encounter people looking for one night stands, thats hardly unique.
But more importantly if the only people you seem to attract are those who are interested solely in one night quickies with a TS then perhaps you should ask yourself are you socialising in the right venues ?

teemm

Louise, indeed you hit the nail on the head. My self esteem was rock bottom. I hated my male image, detested seeing myself in a mirror. But also didn't understand what I was. Some kind of pervert? Remember in pre internet days, info was hard to come by. I fell in with transvestites initially but couldn't understand how they referred to their female persona in third person or almost role played as women. It was nothing so much like a mens club where they happened to dress as women. They sussed me quick enough and the reception was not as quite what I thought. I 'passed' very well too and some jealousy was experienced.

So I was just glad that anyone was interested in me for a time. However that all changed and my self esteem is now where it should be. So if I sleep with some bloke it's because I want to. I enjoy sex after all. But of course it's no longer necessary for me to do so to prove something. Really that happened because I came out to some female friends eventually. Big revelation, except they already had an inkling, surprise, surprise. Although they thought gay, because of course people do. Even a straight male friend took it all in his stride.

Boston,
Essentially you correct as far as I'm concerned but as stated above my female friends had no trouble accepting it and we simply didn't discuss it per se. They simply relate to me as a woman. Women seem to have an innate instinct for this. You have no idea how relaxing that is. With other TS's it often seems to be shop talk, comparing notes etc. With women the issue of me being TS doesn't arise. It's just girl talk, if you see what I mean. You see I really want to be a woman in the purist sense, not someone who had a 'sex change' or is described as a 'transsexual'. An ludicrously impossible dream of course. Although I cling onto the possibility of reincarnation LOL. Next time maybe:D
As for men, I would like a straight man naturally, although I would class myself as bi, in fact in practice I have never been with a woman as such. Gay men are not interested in me as a woman, naturally enough. A bi man might.

Rev,
That's true but the one difference is you are a straight woman there are quite a few men interested in a relationship. There are very few straight men looking for a transexual girlfriend. Very few gay either. Conversely if you are lesbian, you might want a 'real' woman. As for straight women, well they want a man. So you see it's an ever reducing subset. Even the 'admirers' are few in number and often married. They certainly don't want to feature in the 'Sun' for leaving their wife and kids for a transexual!

As it happens, I met all my men via the internet or phone chat lines.
Phew I write too much. I guess learning to type was a good thing.

Louisevb

But more importantly if the only people you seem to attract are those who are interested solely in one night quickies with a TS then perhaps you should ask yourself are you socialising in the right venues ?

A good question your Reverence. but as teemm has said she meets through chat lines and the net, what other options are there? I've tried dating sites, but the response is the same exactly. I don't think Ireland is really ready to see transexuals as anything other than objects of sexual titillation. In time when people have gotten used to us and we have raised the TS profile and we are seen as just ordinary people going about our lives then we will be accepted by society generally.
I'm the treasurer of TENI http://www.teni.ie
We are working on a lot of projects and have an EGM this Saturday in Outhouse at 4pm... Please come along and see the work that we are doing You can join for €5. I promise an interesting hour of your time
Regards
Louise

Kazobel

Rev Hellfire wrote:

The thing here and I admit I may be missing something something fundamental here is that I can't see anything special here. Every night of the week people go out looking for a partner for a lasting relationship and encounter people looking for one night stands, thats hardly unique.
But more importantly if the only people you seem to attract are those who are interested solely in one night quickies with a TS then perhaps you should ask yourself are you socialising in the right venues ?

Socialising isn't the problem since I pass really well as does Hypatia and in public our gender wouldn't be questioned, we're seen as women. Our problem are online freaks they see TS and think sl*t. It's a big assumption between them all that all we think of is sex so to socialise outside that group we'd have to stay off the internet because that's where it's core is.

Marksie

Kazobel wrote:

But why should we settle for "passive acceptance", no other group has to. Are you suggesting we should just put up with being dehumanised until society changes? just shag every "straight" guy who offers to further our acceptance?.

I am happy enough that people just shrug about my sexuality. i dont expect them to jump through hoops and shake my hands neither do I expect them to show aggressive behaviour and i am sorry but you are no different than any other minority group in that regard.

Where did i suggest that you should be dehumanised or that you should shag every straight guy, your interpreting my words to fit your world view.

Kazobel wrote:

No actually, at least men and women are given status as people, as individuals, as humans we aren't by these people.

"these" people are not all people though i tend to agree with the rev on his assertation that you are looking in the wrong venues. But why do you bother wwith "these" people at all if they cause you so much hatred, even to treat them like crap. It smacks of continued self-reaffirmation of TS as group totally outside of society.

WootOps

Ok im actually the op (ILikeTGirls) , i decided to register an account for my unreg stuff.


first of all - im not into men in wigs or clothes (as has been suggested) , im talking about girls who happen to have penises that nobody would ever guess were pre op or male in any way if you walked by them on the street.

2nd of all i am actually looking for a relationship, not just to use people for sex, i dont believe thats right, a transsexual may be slightly different to the norms of male or female but their still a person with feelings.

3rd of all thanks to most people for their help on this

also the girl in the picture in this thread - wow, thats exacltey the type of woman im after, does she have any friends in the 18-20 catagory :P

Kazobel

WootOps wrote:

Ok im actually the op (ILikeTGirls) , i decided to register an account for my unreg stuff.


first of all - im not into men in wigs or clothes (as has been suggested) , im talking about girls who happen to have penises that nobody would ever guess were pre op or male in any way if you walked by them on the street.

2nd of all i am actually looking for a relationship, not just to use people for sex, i dont believe thats right, a transsexual may be slightly different to the norms of male or female but their still a person with feelings.

3rd of all thanks to most people for their help on this

also the girl in the picture in this thread - wow, thats exacltey the type of woman im after, does she have any friends in the 18-20 catagory :P

Listen, two questions will solve this really quickly.

Have you told your friends and family you like Transsexuals?

If you were with one, would you tell them?

Kazobel

Marksie wrote:

"these" people are not all people though i tend to agree with the rev on his assertation that you are looking in the wrong venues. But why do you bother wwith "these" people at all if they cause you so much hatred, even to treat them like crap. It smacks of continued self-reaffirmation of TS as group totally outside of society.

Yet again I'll say we don't look for them, where we socialise we pass as women so never get approached by them because they, like everyone else, don't know. They look for us, usually on the internet on boards like this one, so what are we to do? stop using the internet?

Kazobel

Kazobel wrote:

Listen, two questions will solve this really quickly.

Have you told your friends and family you like Transsexuals?

If you were with one, would you tell them?

Not replying for two days proves my point, you may like us but you still see us as something to be embarrassed about, so why would we want you? Would you expect us to lie just to maintain your delusion of straighness? we want more than that and your pathetic attempt at starting a thread to innicate contact was well seen by us, you're not the first and you won't be the last to try this **** :rolleyes:

ixoy

Kazobel wrote:

Not replying for two days proves my point

No it doesn't. It's actually possible that the OP isn't hovering around boards constantly over a weekend and looking for an update to this thread and may reply at a later point, when they can. You may be right, you may be wrong but give people time before you lay out your wrath.

Nick_oliveri

Up with sexual freedom! Always wanted to be a "lesbian". That'd be sweet.

That jpeg posted earlier. nice......

Louisevb

Would you recognise any of these women on the street as anything other than female?

They are all single btw

JC 2K3

Kazobel wrote:

Not replying for two days proves my point, you may like us but you still see us as something to be embarrassed about, so why would we want you? Would you expect us to lie just to maintain your delusion of straighness? we want more than that and your pathetic attempt at starting a thread to innicate contact was well seen by us, you're not the first and you won't be the last to try this **** :rolleyes:

About 10% of the population is gay, yet I'd say about 90% have fetishes of some kind.

The fact that pretty much all fetishes are seen as embarassing is sad, I agree, but just because a heterosexual person is embarassed about a fantasy they have of having sex with a member of the same sex or a transgendered person doesn't make them deluded about their sexual orientation and in fact it doesn't make them gay. (It might make them bi if you liberally applied the term but that would just be pedantic)

Statso

I would never have guessed the person in the middle wasn't a woman however i would have guessed the other two people were. Actually the person in the middle picture is a stunner going on that pic. And i'm sure every other guy in here would admit that openly too if they were just shown the pic with no other information with it.

Louisevb

Statso wrote:

I would never have guessed the person in the middle wasn't a woman however i would have guessed the other two people were. Actually the person in the middle picture is a stunner going on that pic. And i'm sure every other guy in here would admit that openly too if they were just shown the pic with no other information with it.

Well actually, the last one is of myself, and I live 24/7... So the fact that you were able to "read" me says a lot about your perception...In fairness that's an old pic from about two years ago... I've been on hormones now for quite some time and shape wise and hair everything looks a lot different.

teemm

I'm the woman in the middle picture:D I wish. Personally I find it easy enough to 'read' most transgender people. But then I have inside info after all. On occasion I have exchanged a glance of recognition on the street. I have to say it's bit easier for others to read me as I haven't quite got there yet.

Boston

Whats the point in playing "can you guess the gender"? If someone says "no I can't tell" does that make you feel better Vs someone saying "I can tell"? I ask because there seems to be an obsession with how the world, strangers to be exact, view transgenders people amounth various transgendered people that post here.

SassyGirl_1

Personally, I think it is just an ego boosting/competition exercise. The assumed idea being if you pass through a crowd of strangers and no one bats an eyelid then the perception is that you are passing flawlessly. If you pass thus you are perfect in the eyes of those around you – and your own eyes too.
Plus it has an inherent “If only you knew” additional thrill.
The realisation that actually the vast majority of the public could not care one way or another is lost.

The competition comes from the idea that if you pass flawlessly, every time, then when you look at another GID individual’s photo and you can spot all the ‘mistakes’ or signs that would get them ‘clocked’ then obviously you are better then them. And even more so if an ordinary member of the public looks at your photo and another GIDs one and clocks them, but not you – bonus points for you!!!

Of course the downside is that when you are eventually clocked it hurts even more – your ego is seriously bruised – seeing as you were up so high on your own personal pedestal having someone kick it out from under you is no fun. And being up so high, it is a long way down – makes the sudden stop all the more painful.

Later,

Ck.

dean3104

wow single. thats cool. i've been looking for a date like this. its not easy in limerick. the best of to worlds. for louisevb

Louisevb

Personally, I think it is just an ego boosting/competition exercise. The assumed idea being if you pass through a crowd of strangers and no one bats an eyelid then the perception is that you are passing flawlessly. If you pass thus you are perfect in the eyes of those around you – and your own eyes too.
Plus it has an inherent “If only you knew” additional thrill.
The realisation that actually the vast majority of the public could not care one way or another is lost.

A cynical comment from someone who has obviously, not much of an understanding of why a TS is a TS.
A TS if they pass well, will see themselves as having been able to achieve their inner level of contentment, and they will feel closer to who they really are... It has nothing to do with those on the street not caring a jot, absolutely nothing... nor has it anything to do with one upmanship and the thrill of passing. ...
Those comments may well be appropriate in the contest of transvestism, but certainly not in the TS context
Louise TS

SassyGirl_1

Louisevb wrote:

A cynical comment from someone who has obviously, not much of an understanding of why a TS is a TS.
A TS if they pass well, will see themselves as having been able to achieve their inner level of contentment, and they will feel closer to who they really are... It has nothing to do with those on the street not caring a jot, absolutely nothing... nor has it anything to do with one upmanship and the thrill of passing. ...
Those comments may well be appropriate in the contest of transvestism, but certainly not in the TS context
Louise TS

Maybe I do, maybe I don't.

But hey, no point arguing a point of view that we both have experience of now is there?
Later,

Ck.

LegacyUser

'Well the girl in the middle is hot, as well as the pic earlier in the thread. I've dated a transsexual, she was pre op, and for people thinking it was about her penis, no it wasn't. In fact we never truly had sex...well a little bit kinda, but no intercourse just really making out (I'm still a virgin actually....I'm 25 and I'm man enough to admit that, and it was by choice) . We met a few years ago online, and started chatting then went out and became friends for a bit before we started to get serious and date. It was on some dating site, and yes i knew from the description she was transsexual. But that wasn't the reason to contact her, I just thought she was kinda cute, so we talked. She no longer lives here because she moved due to the hurricane with her parents losing their home. They stay up north now. I miss her, but we've moved on, but I'm single right now. I can't say anyone's gay for liking a transgendered person, maybe bi, but that's sorta confusing still. I do like transsexuals, but i have little interest in what's between their legs, i wanna know them not the private parts....sex will eventually happen sure, but we need to connect on an emotional level.

But if you are only interested in her because she has a penis, i dunno what to say. you are a. in denial , b just a normal guy looking for sex (kinda a bad way to get into a relationship, if she's looking for something more than sex)
c. bi, . but in all i dunno what to really say.'

velad

Kazobel, people being treated as sex objects isn't anything new or gender specific. It happens with women constantly. Thats why there is prostitution, etc. I'm sure you will find a man who will make you happy and treat you properly. It might take time and patience but it's the same story for every woman.

What may be the problem for you is you could be looking in the wrong places. In my opinion, internet personals are quite seedy. I've browsed some such as gaire, gaycork, etc, out of curiosity and saw not much more than overweight, middle-aged men who want 'discreet' sex and 'cant accom', or as you say, people who want to 'experiment'. If these are the kind of places you are looking for love then I'm not suprised you havn't found it.

I've seen your pics on gaire, and I think you are very pretty. And from the little I know about your personality from being online (I know that online personality can be polar to real personality) you seem like a nice person. If I wasn't in a relationship I would offer to date you.




Back to the original topic...

I wouldn't consider myself any of the labels that are banded about such as gay, bi, straight, etc. I'm attracted to the female physique. I don't find the male physique a turn on. I would date a natural female or a male with an effeminate physique. To me, what's between the legs is irrelevant. I like dicks and I like pussy. But I don't like hairy dicks or hairy bodies and I like effeminate facial features. It's just my preference. Does that make me gay, straight, bi or what? I don't care what a person labels me. I'm with a natural female that the moment but she is/was male I wouldn't care about anybody knowing that my partner is/was a male. The only opinions of me that would matter to me would be that of my partner.

On top of that, I like to crossdress. I wouldn't consider myself a tv,ts, whatever. I'm male, I know that and I'm happy with that. I like being a man. I like what are primarily considered man things such as sport, cars, etc. I walk, talk and look like a man. But, I do have an effeminate side buried beneath my masculine exterior. Sometimes, not all the time, I like to wear dresses, skirts, tops, boots, and makeup. I feel comfortable in them and like it. I wouldn't try to pretend that I'm female, I don't see the point because even when I'm dressed I know I'm male and am happy with that. I just like wearing womens clothes and makeup.

So, I'm a man who likes women and also dick but only with very effeminate men, and I also like to crossdress occasionally. Is there a label for me? I dunno, but I'm not confused about it because I know what I like and don't like. So to anybody who's confused about what you 'are', I say don't worry about it and just think about what you like and what you don't like.

Louisevb

Velad,
I have to agree pretty much here.
If you have a mental connection with someone, the sexual side follows automatically, regardless of whether they are male or female or transexual.
The emotional and mental connection will carry you through when the sexual side waynes....Look at all those lovely old age couples who adore each other, when for whatever reason the sexual side has long since gone.

Kazobel

velad wrote: »

Kazobel, people being treated as sex objects isn't anything new or gender specific. It happens with women constantly. Thats why there is prostitution, etc. I'm sure you will find a man who will make you happy and treat you properly. It might take time and patience but it's the same story for every woman.

What makes you assume I want a man? I'm happily living with my girlfriend :rolleyes: and we aren't treated as "sex objects" we're treated as a fetish.

What may be the problem for you is you could be looking in the wrong places. In my opinion, internet personals are quite seedy. I've browsed some such as gaire, gaycork, etc, out of curiosity and saw not much more than overweight, middle-aged men who want 'discreet' sex and 'cant accom', or as you say, people who want to 'experiment'. If these are the kind of places you are looking for love then I'm not suprised you havn't found it.

What is this obsession you all have with where I'm "looking"? I've already stated that I don't use classifieds anywhere. I don't need to look, I get hit on just chatting on a forum solely because I am Transsexual.

I've seen your pics on gaire, and I think you are very pretty. And from the little I know about your personality from being online (I know that online personality can be polar to real personality) you seem like a nice person.

Thank, I know I'm pretty, I work hard at it but my online personallity is me in real life too and I doubt anyone who posts on Gaire would call me a "nice person"

If I wasn't in a relationship I would offer to date you.

And I'd turn you down, I'd never, ever date any guy that is only dating me because I'm TS for the simple fact that there's nothing in it for me. I plan to have all the parts that make me TS removed and I have no doubts that when the penis is gone it won't take long for him to follow.

Back to the original topic...

I wouldn't consider myself any of the labels that are banded about such as gay, bi, straight, etc. I'm attracted to the female physique. I don't find the male physique a turn on. I would date a natural female or a male with an effeminate physique. To me, what's between the legs is irrelevant. I like dicks and I like pussy. But I don't like hairy dicks or hairy bodies and I like effeminate facial features. It's just my preference. Does that make me gay, straight, bi or what? I don't care what a person labels me. I'm with a natural female that the moment but she is/was male I wouldn't care about anybody knowing that my partner is/was a male. The only opinions of me that would matter to me would be that of my partner.

On top of that, I like to crossdress. I wouldn't consider myself a tv,ts, whatever. I'm male, I know that and I'm happy with that. I like being a man. I like what are primarily considered man things such as sport, cars, etc. I walk, talk and look like a man. But, I do have an effeminate side buried beneath my masculine exterior. Sometimes, not all the time, I like to wear dresses, skirts, tops, boots, and makeup. I feel comfortable in them and like it. I wouldn't try to pretend that I'm female, I don't see the point because even when I'm dressed I know I'm male and am happy with that. I just like wearing womens clothes and makeup.

So, I'm a man who likes women and also dick but only with very effeminate men, and I also like to crossdress occasionally. Is there a label for me? I dunno, but I'm not confused about it because I know what I like and don't like. So to anybody who's confused about what you 'are', I say don't worry about it and just think about what you like and what you don't like.

Yes, you're a Transvestite whether you consider yourself one or not