Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Newly wed...

Options
  • 13-09-2007 2:37pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 5,743 ✭✭✭


    A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."

    "Where are you going, coochy cooh?" asked the wife.

    "I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I' m going to have a beer."

    The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?"

    She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, England etc.

    The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, "Yes, lolly pop...but at the bar you know...they have frozen glasses..."

    He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying...

    "You want a frozen glass, puppy face?"

    She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.

    The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, tootsie roll, but at the Bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"

    You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?" She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, sausage rolls, mushroom caps, vol-au-vents, etc.

    “But my sweet honey... At the bar... You know...there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."

    "You want dirty words, D**khead? Drink your f**king beer in your Goddamn frozen mug and eat your motherf**king snacks, because you are Married now, and you aren't f**king going anywhere! Got it, A**hole?"



    …….. they lived happily ever after.


Comments

Advertisement