Now thats just stingy!

Archeron

There are many people out there who wouldn't be classed as overly generous what with scabbing cigerattes and forgetting their rounds and so on, but have you ever come across a person that just made you shout "You big mean b*stard" at the top of your lungs, and then slap them?

The worst I've encountered has to have been a bloke I know who bought his mother one of those plastic singing light up Santa things for Christmas, which she pretended to love, and wanted to switch on straight away. However, batteries werent included, so she couldnt see it in all its annoying glory.
Lo and behold, the giver of the gift just happened to have plenty of batteries that fit, and he sold, yes, SOLD her a packet for the cheap tacky present he had just given her. He made a mark up of about 150% on what he paid for them a few days before in the shop. All this on Christmas morning.

Had to have been the single meanest thing I've ever seen anyone do.

So do you have any tales of incredible meany beany bofeaniness to share?

Slow Motion

Archeron wrote:

There are many people out there who wouldn't be classed as overly generous what with scabbing cigerattes and forgetting their rounds and so on, but have you ever come across a person that just made you shout "You big mean b*stard" at the top of your lungs, and then slap them?

The worst I've encountered has to have been a bloke I know who bought his mother one of those plastic singing light up Santa things for Christmas, which she pretended to love, and wanted to switch on straight away. However, batteries werent included, so she couldnt see it in all its annoying glory.
Lo and behold, the giver of the gift just happened to have plenty of batteries that fit, and he sold, yes, SOLD her a packet for the cheap tacky present he had just given her. He made a mark up of about 150% on what he paid for them a few days before in the shop. All this on Christmas morning.

Had to have been the single meanest thing I've ever seen anyone do.

So do you have any tales of incredible meany beany bofeaniness to share?

What a prince

MrJoeSoap

Karl Pilkington buying Suzanne an industrial sized packet of condoms for Christmas one year.

Wook

in my native country , there would be old people that leave the tap on a small drip so they dont have to pay for it, and collect the drips in a bottle.

goose06

Had a friend, tight fecker, would never buy a round or even if you wnet to the chip shop, he try and grab a few chips off you rather than get some for himself. Anyway to make it worse he was in a car crash, not hurt or anything, got about 30K out of it and the day he cashed his cheque he asked us out for a drink and didn't even buy us a drink.

Agamemnon

When I was sharing a house with a bunch of friends in college, one of them used to get a huge delivery of food once a week from his parents, who owned a supermarket. They sent him several boxes of cakes, cereal, biscuits, booze, meat, you name it. He never shared any of it with us, the scabby fucker, and he grew steadily fatter as the year went on.

One night he was out of the house when his mother brought the food and we found out from her that she was sending it up for all of us all along. Needless to say, we tore into the food and finished most of it before he got home and freaked out. I ate a box of potato waffles, a 12-inch chocolate cake and a box of Crunchy Nut Corn Flakes, all washed down with a bottle of wine. I puked my ring up the next day but it was worth it.

is_that_so

Still not convinced this story was 100% true but worth telling. A chap I knew casually through friends was renowned to be extremely tight. He would run off to the bog when it was his round next. One night he headed off to the bog as usual as his round came near. While he was gone one of the other boys got a beer mat, put in on top of the pint, flipped it , put it down on the bar and slid out the beermat , thus leaving the guy's pint sitting upside down on the bar. Now there wasn't that much left in it but rather than give up on it he went mad and tried to rescue it and spilt it all over himself.

whiskeyman

Worked for a global dutch company a few years ago.
One of their top brass came over to the Dublin office, and he asked us to go to the pub after work for drinks and a chat.
4 of us went over, and he went in first... but then held off, and expected one of us (mostly poor feckers on our first jobs out of college) to go to the bar first to get him a drink.... I reluctantly started a round, but he stayed for 3 and never got his round in!!!
and this guy was easily on over 150k a year!!
F**kin tight B*STARD!!!#%!#$%#$% I'll never forget that! I wanted to throttle him!

deep breaths...

whiskeyman

is_that_so wrote:

Still not convinced this story was 100% true but worth telling. A chap I knew casually through friends was renowned to be extremely tight. He would run off to the bog when it was his round next. One night he headed off to the bog as usual as his round came near. While he was gone one of the other boys got a beer mat, put in on top of the pint, flipped it , put it down on the bar and slid out the beermat , thus leaving the guy's pint sitting upside down on the bar. Now there wasn't that much left in it but rather than give up on it he went mad and tried to rescue it and spilt it all over himself.

why oh why did you tell that?
You do realise that's going to be tried in bars up and down the land over the next week or so?

Hold onto yer pint gents...

Bendihorse

Went to bar with a few of my boyfriends friends, there were 5 of us in total.

1st guy (Mark) bought 1st round,

2nd guy (Tom) bought 2nd round,

3rd Round was bought by me,

Came to 4th round and 4th guy (Kevin) was about to buy a drink when the 5th member of the party (Fergal - who had not yet got his round) said that he didn't want to be in round anymore and wanted to go in a round with the lad that was currently buying drink - kevin. I said to kevin at bar that he should buy a round for everyone and finish out 1st round then we could split up if needs be... Which he did.

5th round comes up - 5th person (Fergal) has absconded to toilet

First person had gone home so 2nd person (Tom) buys 5th round.

5th person arrives back from jacks (Fergal) and drinks his 5th drink

3rd person (Me) buys 6th drink and hand Fergals drink out to him only to realise that he had a full drink in his hand already, as had Kevin.

I Didn't pass too much heed... On to next round, Kevin bought drink for everyone and once again fergal disappeared and came back with 2 drinks for him and Kevin.

Next thing its his round and where is he?? In the jacks! Then he arrives BACK from jacks to all of us with empty glasses and him with a full one!! I siad to him 'Your Round' and he laughed and said i have one here, im not able for another one for a while!!!!

2nd Person (Tom) buys round and leaves out 5th Person...

I never in all my life witnessed someone to go to such lenghts to get out of buying a round!! Snaky fcuker! Told BF and he said 'im not really that friendly with him anyway, dont worry, hes not going to be brought out again'

Bendihorse

Went to bar with a few of my boyfriends friends, there were 5 of us in total.

1st guy (Mark) bought 1st round,

2nd guy (Tom) bought 2nd round,

3rd Round was bought by me,

Came to 4th round and 4th guy (Kevin) was about to buy a drink when the 5th member of the party (Fergal - who had not yet got his round) said that he didn't want to be in round anymore and wanted to go in a round with the lad that was currently buying drink - kevin. I said to kevin at bar that he should buy a round for everyone and finish out 1st round then we could split up if needs be... Which he did.

5th round comes up - 5th person (Fergal) has absconded to toilet

First person had gone home so 2nd person (Tom) buys 5th round.

5th person arrives back from jacks (Fergal) and drinks his 5th drink

3rd person (Me) buys 6th drink and hand Fergals drink out to him only to realise that he had a full drink in his hand already, as had Kevin.

I Didn't pass too much heed... On to next round, Kevin bought drink for everyone and once again fergal disappeared and came back with 2 drinks for him and Kevin.

Next thing its his round and where is he?? In the jacks! Then he arrives BACK from jacks to all of us with empty glasses and him with a full one!! I siad to him 'Your Round' and he laughed and said i have one here, im not able for another one for a while!!!!

2nd Person (Tom) buys round and leaves out 5th Person...

I never in all my life witnessed someone to go to such lenghts to get out of buying a round!! Snaky fcuker! Told BF and he said 'im not really that friendly with him anyway, dont worry, hes not going to be brought out again'

jester77

Lived with a lad who was so tight with the cash. Wouldn't spend anything and was always scabbing things. One example I remember was when it was his turn to buy toilet paper, he would take toilet rolls from his workplace... friggin cheap sandpaper it was too :mad:

Ruu_Old

My younger brother was working in Super Valu on Christmas eve last year and him and a few of the lads were unloading a couple of box of biccies (those ones in the tins, USA or whateve they are called). Anyway, he dropped one by accident and damaged the box. His boss told him he would be taking away his Christmas bonus for it. I don't mind but any other day than Christmas eve!
Every time I see the boss now, I have visions of him stacking his piles of gold and laughing manically.

zuutroy

A guy I know brought a bag of 6 odd cans to a 21st, where the family happened to provide a fairly sizeable stash of booze for the evening. He drank their booze and took his cans home at the end of the night. SOUND!

watna

In my college days I worked in a clothes shop and I always used to be upset by how many mothers would drag their kids around town all day while the mothers shopped. An hour or two is fine but all day is cruel. i felt even worse when some woman (who did not look poor and was buying loads of expensive clothes) told me she came in to town every sunday and brought her kids so she wouldn't have to turn the heating on at home!

mikemac

In my Junior Cert year, I got my first job.
It was collecting trollies around the local supermarket carpark and earned the princely sum of IR£1.50 per hour.:(
I suppose it was cheaper to employ me than put those things on the trolley that give you your euro back when you return them.

It goes without saying I was walking around all day. In fact, I’d get roared at if I was resting against a wall so I was constantly walking around looking for trollys. The car park was massive, about 7-8 football pitches. That’s massive for a 15 year old.

I was wearing cheap Dunnes Stores runners and they were wearing down rapidly. You can buy them for around €15 and if they last two months you’re doing well. My runners were in bits from all the abuse they were getting and then one of the soles came loose.
So everywhere I walked you’d hear my sole bending , SLAP, SLAP, SLAP against the ground. It was a few days to payday so I was holding off getting new runners.

The owner came along, the richest man in town. He enquired about my runners and said “Poor lad, we can’t have that if you’re on your feet all day”. Whipped out a big wad of notes that JP McManus would be proud off and took off the elastic band. I was expecting maybe IR£10 to put towards new runners and I was thinking what a decent man he was.
He put the notes back in his pocket and gave me the elastic band and told me to secure the sole of the runner with that.

Bastard! A few year later he was named and shamed for having an offshore Ansbacher account and had to pay over 2 million punts to the Revenue. Karma!

The Bollox

one of the lads I hang around with is the tightest fúcker I have ever known

one night a few of us were going out for dinner as one of the group was leaving the country. this tight friend, lets call him Bob, said he didn't have any money before they went, and so the father of the person leaving took him to one side and said "don't worry, I'll get your dinner, but don't tell everyone as I don't want to be buying everyones dinner". he said fine.

when we got to the restauraunt Bob bought not one, but two starters and the biggest steak on the menu and said to the lads "this is great, I don't have to pay for this".

on another occation we were over in Bob's house for a few drinks. there was a large mulitpack of crisps in the room we were sitting in, bob takes out a packet and promptly bring the mulitpack into the kitchen before anyone can ask for a bag. later on the beer is making my hungry, so I ask him if I can have a packet of crisps. he looks around the room, spots a packet of monster munch, or some other nice crisps and says I can have them. I thought nothing of it, enfact I thought this was a new generous side of Bob I was seeing. No, 10 minutes after I finish the bag one of lads comes back, looks around the room, looks at the empty bag of crisps and gives out to me for eating them on him, calling me a greedy fúcker. I wasted no time in telling him what actually happened and Bob spent the rest of the night getting abuse hurled at him.

one more example: a few years ago we were having a Hallowe'en session, I brought over about 8 cans of heineken. Bob asks me for one and I said he could have one. I had 4 of the 8 cans, and could find no more of them left in the fridge. I decided not to jump to conclusions, that someone else might have taken one or two aswell (I didn't really know Bob that well at this stage). So I went down to the offy to get an aditional 6 cans and specifically told Bob that he couldn't have any more of my drinks and half of mine were taken. he called me a tight arse and other things (like the ironing here?) and once again I only managed to drink half of the cans. I have never let this incident lie, I was very very píssed off, as you can imagine, 7 cans of heineken isn't exactly cheap

Keano

Two little tales of tightness...

Was at a house party a few months back and this couple arrived with a bottle of wine. The cheapest wine they could find.
What did the couple drink? Nearly every bottle of bud in the place! My gf had told me that they were like that but I couldnt get over the cheek of them.

Was at a wedding and a fella at out table disappears and comes back with a small back pack. Couldn’t understand what the wanted the bag for but then I see his missus had changed her shoes. So I think ok fair enough. But as night went on I see her wine glass from the meal is nearly always full. Her bf had always came back from the bar with just one drink for himself. Anyhow by end of the night they were both hammered! I couldn’t understand how she was… But for some reason I had to look under the table and what do I see… An empty bottle of Cherry! The bag was used to bring it in. I thought smuggling in small bottle was ok but a big bottle was just scabby!

Slow Motion

micmclo wrote:

The owner came along, the richest man in town. He enquired about my runners and said “Poor lad, we can’t have that if you’re on your feet all day”. Whipped out a big wad of notes that JP McManus would be proud off and took off the elastic band. I was expecting maybe IR£10 to put towards new runners and I was thinking what a decent man he was.
He put the notes back in his pocket and gave me the elastic band and told me to secure the sole of the runner with that.

I'm sorry but Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha That's the funniest thing I've heard all day

Maple

Nearly worse than not buying a round, there's this girl friend of mine who when it is her round buys herself a glass of heineken BUT when its someone else's round asks for a vodka and coke/red bull. Scabby mare. :mad:

And used live with two Ozzy backpackers who would never buy anything for the house, no washing up liquid, no black bags, nothing. I then took it upon myself to do a big shop and get everything we needed. Was like trying to get blood from a stone as get the 4 measly quid from them that they owed. They begrudged paying for everything, miserly sods.

Gizzle

agamemnon wrote:

When I was sharing a house with a bunch of friends in college, one of them used to get a huge delivery of food once a week from his parents, who owned a supermarket. They sent him several boxes of cakes, cereal, biscuits, booze, meat, you name it. He never shared any of it with us, the scabby fucker, and he grew steadily fatter as the year went on.

One night he was out of the house when his mother brought the food and we found out from her that she was sending it up for all of us all along. Needless to say, we tore into the food and finished most of it before he got home and freaked out. I ate a box of potato waffles, a 12-inch chocolate cake and a box of Crunchy Nut Corn Flakes, all washed down with a bottle of wine. I puked my ring up the next day but it was worth it.

Hopefully on the rat bast's face. I hate greedy arse bandits like that.

TPD

Well, at least he got fat because of becoming greedy. I knew someone that stole some 'incriminating substances', say about €30 worth, and when he was accused of doing it he denied it. So as not to get the **** kicked out of him, he stopped going out at weekends for a year and a half. He stayed in the whole summer. The person he stole it off didnt care by about 2 weeks later.

Nala

I used to go out with someone who, on Valentine's Day, handed me my Valentine's card and, before I had even opened the envelope, proceeded to start giving out about how he had splashed out all of €3.50 on it.

Then there was the time we went to the cinema and he refused to spend 2 or 3 euro on a bag of sweets, saying they were "too expensive". We ended up having a row which cost him €14 in phone credit to fix.

To make things worse the stingy git wasn't even spending his own money, it was all Mammy's handouts. Mammy gave him an allowance every week- rent, food, whatever he wanted all paid for, while he sneered at me as I slaved away in a fast food kip every weekend for minimum wage.

ArmaniJeanss

6 of us on holidays together - if the bill for a meal came to say €110 then someone would say €20 each. One of the lads, Malachy, would hold back til last and would just put in the bare €10 to bring it up to the €110.

And I know another bloke who went around all the tables at the end of a wedding recorking the unfinished wine bottles and took them home with him.
He justified it by it being 'a nice wine, shame to waste it'.