The Pregnancy Chat Thread!

mirrorwall14

Six of One wrote: »

Hi ladies, I'm in for anti d on Monday in the rotunda. Does anyone know is it just straightforward, like getting a flu jab? I'll be heading in alone and then straight to work, assume that's okay?

Had to get one last week coz I took a knock. Very straightforward just lots of checks in the nurses part because its a blood product. Actually flu shot is way more sore than it. I only had to hang on 10 mins but I have no fear of needles and was grand

Merkin

Six of One wrote: »

Hi ladies, I'm in for anti d on Monday in the rotunda. Does anyone know is it just straightforward, like getting a flu jab? I'll be heading in alone and then straight to work, assume that's okay?

Because it's a human antibody you'll have to sign a disclaimer etc. Needle is straightforward, given in the thigh and doesn't hurt at all. Then requested to wait for half an hour to ensure there's no adverse reaction. Nothing to worry about so nothing to be nervous about. It's interesting then when your bubba comes to see what blood group they are! I'm A- and Baby Merkin turns out to be A+.

Six of One

Thanks for the replies, that sounds grand!

Whispered

I'm looking at car seats at the moment. If you buy a newborn one that suits up to 9kg about how long would you get out of the seat? I know it depends on the child but I wouldn't even know where to start guessing!

Woshy

Whispered wrote: »

I'm looking at car seats at the moment. If you buy a newborn one that suits up to 9kg about how long would you get out of the seat? I know it depends on the child but I wouldn't even know where to start guessing!

We got about 9/10 months out of ours if I remember correctly. The group 0 ones usually say suitable for up to 12/13 months I think

angeldelight

I got to see my baba in 4D today for a few minutes when consultant switched to that mode to look at something and omg I'm in love

spottybananas

Ladies I am absolutely awful at this telling people/wanting to tell people thing, would like some advice, opinions, or just general chat about it

We had our 12 (actually 11.5) week scan, all was fine, heartbeat, growing, not a very clear pic and I couldn't see the screen properly as it was behind me but my husband assures me it had arms, legs and eyes :P I'm back early next week for a follow up scan at about 15 weeks because that scan was so poor in terms of what they could see (felt like telling them to get a new scanner because a private one at 7 weeks was better clarity). So, really, I'm getting another scan I wasn't going to be getting at all. We are seeing quite a few close family and friends this weekend in the days just before the next scan, our plan was to tell them but now I want to "hold out" in case the 15 week scan shows bad news, and we'll only just have told them all. But originally I wasn't going to be having this other scan, so would've had to tell people after 12 week scan but without another for reassurance until 20+ weeks, so I think I shouldn't be stalling for this reason.

So, basically, what would you do? Would you miss this chance at telling people we love but don't see often in person and possibly end up telling them over the phone later on (these are all very close people who would like to be told and celebrate in person), or tell them now on the basis that the 12 week scan was fine and stuff? I'm not someone who relaxes now after the 12 week one because I am keenly aware things can go wrong at any time, which I think is colouring my opinion on this, others rush happily to tell once they have that done.

Dolbert

Honestly, just tell them. As you know things can go wrong at any stage, so will you really be in a better place to tell them after the 15 week scan? I say this as it seems to really be hanging over you and, while there are no guarantees, if things look good at 12 weeks your chances of things going wrong are really reduced. Best of luck whatever you decide.

spottybananas

Dolbert wrote: »

Honestly, just tell them. As you know things can go wrong at any stage, so will you really be in a better place to tell them after the 15 week scan? I say this as it seems to really be hanging over you and, while there are no guarantees, if things look good at 12 weeks your chances of things going wrong are really reduced. Best of luck whatever you decide.

It's not that I'll be in a better place to tell them, it's that I just want to save the hassle of telling people and then having to tell them nope afterwards, I don't like fuss and the last thing I would want is sad fuss and people checking up on me (which I am already sick of with my mother in law but that's a whole other thing). I'd prefer not to tell people until it's born if I could get away with it because I just don't like the fuss and am quite private. Just a few days ago a friend who had everyone told at 9 weeks had to send out a group text telling them that she lost the baby (missed miscarriage spotted at first scan) and that has made for quite a few friends feeling very awkward around her now, with some of them afraid to tell me in case it would worry me, I hate all this pussy footing nonsense that goes with going back on good news and would just like avoid it if it happens.

And it's not "hanging over me" at all, not sure where you got that from. I'm a realist, not a pessimist, and in an ideal world would like to give birth to a live healthy child before having everyone chime in, and tbh good 12 weeks scans have preceded all the major problems/stillborns I've encountered in my family/friends circles, so I don't think it's overreacting or being overly cautious at all to not get my hopes up at this stage.

mirrorwall14

spottybananas wrote: »

It's not that I'll be in a better place to tell them, it's that I just want to save the hassle of telling people and then having to tell them nope afterwards, I don't like fuss and the last thing I would want is sad fuss and people checking up on me (which I am already sick of with my mother in law but that's a whole other thing). I'd prefer not to tell people until it's born if I could get away with it because I just don't like the fuss and am quite private. Just a few days ago a friend who had everyone told at 9 weeks had to send out a group text telling them that she lost the baby (missed miscarriage spotted at first scan) and that has made for quite a few friends feeling very awkward around her now, with some of them afraid to tell me in case it would worry me, I hate all this pussy footing nonsense that goes with going back on good news and would just like avoid it if it happens.

And it's not "hanging over me" at all, not sure where you got that from. I'm a realist, not a pessimist, and in an ideal world would like to give birth to a live healthy child before having everyone chime in, and tbh good 12 weeks scans have preceded all the major problems/stillborns I've encountered in my family/friends circles, so I don't think it's overreacting or being overly cautious at all to not get my hopes up at this stage.

Once you have a strong heartbeat the miscarriage rate drops dramatically. I told a lot at 9.5 weeks because of this

spottybananas

mirrorwall14 wrote: »

Once you have a strong heartbeat the miscarriage rate drops dramatically. I told a lot at 9.5 weeks because of this

Yeah I know that, still happens though. Maybe I just know a higher than average amount of people who have lost their babies at 18-30 weeks and soon after birth.

I'm not really sitting here wringing my hands constantly worrying about miscarriage/telling people in case that's the impression people are getting, I'm just trying to pass lonely time isolated at work looking for opinions or experiences. It's more really to do with me being private and not wanting to involve people until I absolutely have to, the less people babying me (pardon the pun) and treating me differently the better, which is why I want to wait as long as possible.

Thanks anyway.

mirrorwall14

spottybananas wrote: »

Yeah I know that.

Personally I wouldn't worry too much about the visuals themselves. You had the strong heartbeat, Id go for it. However based on your posts I think perhaps you lean the other way and Id say go with whatever you are happiest with!

Whispered

If you don't want to tell people, don't. It is your pregnancy so do whatever you feel most comfortable with. I was 14 weeks telling people (granted I only found out at 10 weeks) and it didn't matter to anybody how late it was.

I also found it a nice time to sit back and prepare for the opinions, offers of help, inquiries etc etc. You will get them, it's hard to avoid. Like you I'm very private and would rather go through pregnancy without all the worry from other people (not even my own worry but things like people telling me I shouldn't walk too far or carry things etc). I found it difficult when I started to show because you'd catch the flicker of the eyes to the belly and it'd make me feel very self conscious. Got over it once the belly was proper there and not just a small "is she isn't she" bump.

Dolbert

If you feel better waiting then wait, there's no harm. Only thing is if your immediate family and close friends already know, there's a greater chance of someone letting it slip the longer time goes on.

angeldelight

I'd say it's up to you - only yourself and your husband can make that decision. I suppose you have to weigh up whether it's more important to tell those people in person or wait another little while.

My godmother was over from the UK last week and I really wanted to tell her in person as we're very close so we did - even though due to being away we hadn't actually had a scan after 12 weeks. It was playing on my mind when we went in on Monday for our scan that I'd have more people to tell if anything went wrong, but for me telling her in person was more important as I knew the risk of anything going wrong was so much lower after our scan at 11 weeks

spottybananas

My husband wants to tell everyone, I want to tell nobody. It's immediate family that we are planning to tell this weekend, his still don't know just due to geography and wanting to tell them in person. There isn't much fear of it getting out from the 10 or so people who do know, they are scattered and most have no links to other social circles we have. The ones who know have known for a month or more and it hasn't leaked to anyone yet, such a good secret keeping bunch, they know how much trouble they'd be in if they didn't :P

I think I'm just going to have to grin and bear it, this weekend are all his people so he'll be annoyed with me if I make him wait longer. My own friends and family know me well enough to know I'm not a baby talk "omg so excited lol" kind of person, but I fear for my sanity when his side know based on his mother's (over)enthusiasm so far. She attempted to touch my "belly" a few days ago...I look no different than I have for the last 5 years, she nearly lost the hand :mad:

bobskii

let him tell his people if that's what he wants,then just refuse to engage in the baby talk if and when it comes!I don't do the whole baby talk thing it's just not me either . myself and a friend had a good laugh at how many people I met the other day who tried to engage me in it.

misspumpqueen

Can a woman's 2nd pregnancy differ from her first? I had extremely sore boobs on my first at around 3-4 weeks, n I'm ttc n think I may be pregnant but haven't any sore boobs yet. I'm waiting a week to see if my period comes before taking a test.

spottybananas

misspumpqueen wrote: »

Can a woman's 2nd pregnancy differ from her first? I had extremely sore boobs on my first at around 3-4 weeks, n I'm ttc n think I may be pregnant but haven't any sore boobs yet. I'm waiting a week to see if my period comes before taking a test.

Yes, each pregnancy can differ.

Blingy

spottybananas wrote: »

My husband wants to tell everyone, I want to tell nobody. It's immediate family that we are planning to tell this weekend, his still don't know just due to geography and wanting to tell them in person. There isn't much fear of it getting out from the 10 or so people who do know, they are scattered and most have no links to other social circles we have. The ones who know have known for a month or more and it hasn't leaked to anyone yet, such a good secret keeping bunch, they know how much trouble they'd be in if they didn't :P

I think I'm just going to have to grin and bear it, this weekend are all his people so he'll be annoyed with me if I make him wait longer. My own friends and family know me well enough to know I'm not a baby talk "omg so excited lol" kind of person, but I fear for my sanity when his side know based on his mother's (over)enthusiasm so far. She attempted to touch my "belly" a few days ago...I look no different than I have for the last 5 years, she nearly lost the hand :mad:

Spottybananas you have me in a fit of giggles here at your last comment!!!
Must admit I have no interest telling people. Only told some of my immediate family because they had pretty much guessed. Haven't told hubby's side yet waiting for first hospital appointment and then will tell them. Don't have any interest in the baby talk unless it's people offering to help out ( babysit, offering Moses basket etc) and I know that's probably not right either. It's a long way till the end of May next year!!!
Hubby's parents will be over the moon. Not sure I have much interest in the fawning over me at the time. I know it's awful but everyone is different and I'm not a centre of attention person.
Spottybananas do what feels right for you. There is no right and wrong here!!!

spottybananas

Blingy wrote: »

Hubby's parents will be over the moon. Not sure I have much interest in the fawning over me at the time. I know it's awful but everyone is different and I'm not a centre of attention person.
Spottybananas do what feels right for you. There is no right and wrong here!!!

See this is it though, why is it awful? None of my family fawn over people about anything, we're a very close family but when people have good news we're delighted, congratulate them, then take the p!ss out of them! I love that my husband's family are different (variety is the spice of life and all that) and are quite huggy and emotional, but dear God don't try and touch me without warning me. I've had handholding, crying, the touching incident, over the course of only two days, I just sit there and shut down and want to leave! And then I get asked by everyone "Oh are your family delighted? They must be so excited!"...my family don't really do excitement So I just have to nod and smile!

spottybananas

Oh wise ones, any tips of surviving through the night (and the day to a lesser extent) with really bad nasal congestion? I am prone to it anyway but it has just gone to a whole new level now. It wakes me up, with a banging headache, that I can't lift with just panadol. I had a nasal spray thing but it says it's only suitable in pregnancy if the need outweighs any risks which isn't too comforting.

So anyone have any successful home remedies or advice?

angeldelight

You can get isotonic saline sprays which are quite good, basically like when you get sea water up your nose and it clears everything out - I can't remember the name which is odd as I sell them in work but they'll know in the pharmacy what you're talking about. Also there's a Neilmed sinus rinse which you basically pour up your nose and it clears things out very efficiently as well!

Whispered

I have a quick question. I'm getting the last few bits ready and want to put my going home clothes somewhere easy for my husband to find or go knows what I'll end up wearing home

So I was getting clothes ready and realised that on the day I'll probably want nothing more than to just slob straight home. Do you all recommend getting dressed properly, get back into the world and be presentable or am I better off bringing trakkies and other lazy afternoon clothes. I'm torn.

Dolbert

I'm going to wear home one of my nice stretchy maternity dresses with leggings, nice and comfy! They do recommend you wear comfortable, loose-fitting clothing for the way home.

Ocean Blue

Whispered wrote: »

I have a quick question. I'm getting the last few bits ready and want to put my going home clothes somewhere easy for my husband to find or go knows what I'll end up wearing home

So I was getting clothes ready and realised that on the day I'll probably want nothing more than to just slob straight home. Do you all recommend getting dressed properly, get back into the world and be presentable or am I better off bringing trakkies and other lazy afternoon clothes. I'm torn.

Comfort clothes all the way!! I wore maternity leggings and a loose maternity blouse home. You don't know how much of a bump you'll still have after so don't bring normal clothes with you. My clothes were so comfy and the blouse covered my bum so I wasn't conscious of wearing the big pads that might have been visible under leggings.

Ms2011

I wote loose trakkie bottoms & a hoodie home, didn't want anything too tight on after the section as I was still quite sore.
I didn't get out until 4:30pm so just went straight home & plonked on the couch was in bed not long after that

fro9etb8j5qsl2

I wore maternity leggings and a cosy jumper. Bring loose comfy shoes aswell. I was too sore to bend over and pull my boots on and for some reason, no amount of fooling around from my OH could coax them on (even though my feet hadn't swelled) so I had to wear my slippers going home

spottybananas

Felt a very odd little vibration earlier, I actually checked if my phone was in my hoody pocket...it was on the table. It was in from my hip bone, where the scan would suggest some feet are residing, could it be movement, or just yet another odd muscle I didn't know I had?? I'm just over 16 weeks, and am intrigued

angeldelight

spottybananas wrote: »

Felt a very odd little vibration earlier, I actually checked if my phone was in my hoody pocket...it was on the table. It was in from my hip bone, where the scan would suggest some feet are residing, could it be movement, or just yet another odd muscle I didn't know I had?? I'm just over 16 weeks, and am intrigued

I've no idea but I hope so cause I'm only a few days behind you