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The Pregnancy Chat Thread!

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  • Registered Users Posts: 92 ✭✭Wholeheartedly


    I know someone who is a gentle birthing instructor and a doula, I am meeting her next week for a chat so will pass on any important information after that too. She is into orgasimic birth too, but I would just like to through it safely, not looking for extra kicks too! ;);)


  • Registered Users Posts: 926 ✭✭✭fall


    Ha ha the orgasmic birth thing is mad isn't it. I would do the course as soon as you can green orchard. It's all about training your mind to not have fear so the earlier you start that training the better. I still replay the labour in my head and it was one of the most powerful experiences of my life. My first birth was forceps, epidural, failed induction, you name it! It was all to do with fear. I trusted my body this time around.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 517 ✭✭✭moving_home


    Thanks fall. How far along were you when you went to the workshop? If I go in may I'll be around 30 weeks but I'm wondering if earlier would be better

    I did the workshop at 32 weeks and I thought it was good timing for my husband especially as everything was becoming real for him at that stage and it was more relevant to him than if I had done it earlier. It was also the timeframe that I was doing my birth preferences etc. I had gone through the book and being listening to my cd's daily since 11 weeks and reading all the stories on the Facebook page so I had been doing enough to be in the zone prior to the workshop.


  • Registered Users Posts: 926 ✭✭✭fall


    I really enjoyed the Facebook page, Reading such great birth stories and there was no question that couldn't be asked. I loved that I knew so much about my hospital's policies and that i really understood the benefits behind things like delayed cord clamping.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,162 ✭✭✭autumnbelle


    I did the workshop at 32 weeks and I thought it was good timing for my husband especially as everything was becoming real for him at that stage and it was more relevant to him than if I had done it earlier. It was also the timeframe that I was doing my birth preferences etc. I had gone through the book and being listening to my cd's daily since 11 weeks and reading all the stories on the Facebook page so I had been doing enough to be in the zone prior to the workshop.

    Have any of you used just the c.ds?


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 517 ✭✭✭moving_home


    Have any of you used just the c.ds?

    It is possible to get loads out of gentlebirth by just using the home study course ie cd's and workbook by putting in the work at home. However I will say that I've heard people rubbish gentlebirth and those are people who just listened to the cd's and expected miracles. It's not just about listening to cd's and hoping you are going to have an amazing birth. The cd's are a brilliant tool when combined with changing your mindset and how you think about birth and informing yourself of your hospital policies and the best way to navigate the system.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,391 ✭✭✭fro9etb8j5qsl2


    Have any of you used just the c.ds?

    I used just the cds from around 20 weeks and I also read marie mongans hypnobirthing book which I found a little bit ott in parts but had some very useful breathing techniques in it. I also found the book good for taking the fear away. In the end, I was induced and the breathing and visualisation really helped me cope with the contractions, which I found to be more intense and uncomfortable than painful. I still ended up having an epidural because my blood pressure went very high and the pitocin drip was causing back to back super intense contractions but by then I near the end of labour anyway. I really think the gentle birth cds helped, it really makes you focus and work through the contractions.


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,175 ✭✭✭angeldelight


    My poor hubby cracks me up... He was reading something online about someone's baby being 7lb when born and 6lb 10oz when leaving hospital and was asking me why they would weigh less so I explained. Now he's panicking and has researched baby scales so we could monitor baby and make sure they put it back on asap. Very funny :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,162 ✭✭✭autumnbelle


    Just filling out maternity benefit form, one of the questions asks have you started work in the last 3 years. I have in late 2012 ... does maternity benefit need me to have been working constantly for the last 3 years? I have worked with the one company since late 2012. I thought it just needed paid stamps for the last 52 weeks?
    Thanks in advance, worrier here :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 356 ✭✭5unflower


    I think the relevant info in relation to this is here (quoted from the information leaflet on maternity benefit on the DSP website):

    "3. What are the PRSI contribution conditions?
    Employees
    To qualify for Maternity Benefit, you must satisfy one of the following PRSI contribution conditions. You must have:
    • at least 39 paid PRSI* contributions in the 12-month period before the first day of your maternity leave,
    or
    • at least 39 paid PRSI* contributions since first starting work and at least 39 paid or credited PRSI* contributions in the relevant tax year, or in the year following the relevant tax year,
    or
    • at least 26 paid PRSI* contributions in the relevant tax year and at least 26 paid PRSI* contributions in the tax year before the relevant tax year.
    * Only PRSI at Classes A, E and H count."

    I think whenever they refer to the "relevant" tax year in the above, it's two years before the year you go on maternity leave, i.e. for someone going on maternity leave in 2015, the relevant tax year is 2013 etc.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,162 ✭✭✭autumnbelle


    5unflower wrote: »
    I think the relevant info in relation to this is here (quoted from the information leaflet on maternity benefit on the DSP website):

    "3. What are the PRSI contribution conditions?
    Employees
    To qualify for Maternity Benefit, you must satisfy one of the following PRSI contribution conditions. You must have:
    • at least 39 paid PRSI* contributions in the 12-month period before the first day of your maternity leave,
    or
    • at least 39 paid PRSI* contributions since first starting work and at least 39 paid or credited PRSI* contributions in the relevant tax year, or in the year following the relevant tax year,
    or
    • at least 26 paid PRSI* contributions in the relevant tax year and at least 26 paid PRSI* contributions in the tax year before the relevant tax year.
    * Only PRSI at Classes A, E and H count."

    I think whenever they refer to the "relevant" tax year in the above, it's two years before the year you go on maternity leave, i.e. for someone going on maternity leave in 2015, the relevant tax year is 2013 etc.

    Thanks Sunflower so my 2012 doesnt come into it at all :) I am relieved as I had myself convinced I was not going to have enough contributions :/ Will be hard enough with only maternity benefit but if I didnt qualify I would struggle big time!
    I wonder then if girls come back from maternity leave pregant can you still get maternity leave for the next child? ( not considering it!!! the fear of needles and hospitals are enough to terrify me for now :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,131 ✭✭✭RentDayBlues


    Thanks Sunflower so my 2012 doesnt come into it at all :) I am relieved as I had myself convinced I was not going to have enough contributions :/ Will be hard enough with only maternity benefit but if I didnt qualify I would struggle big time!
    I wonder then if girls come back from maternity leave pregant can you still get maternity leave for the next child? ( not considering it!!! the fear of needles and hospitals are enough to terrify me for now :)

    Of course you can! You get prsi credits while on maternity leave, it's considered being under normal employment, same for unpaid leave


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,162 ✭✭✭autumnbelle


    Would any of you buy a car seat second hand? I want an isofix base and the seat I seen maxicosi will be about €300 or over for both but seen someone selling one for €70 online for both. But as a ftm I dont want to if its not safe


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 776 ✭✭✭seventeen sheep


    Would any of you buy a car seat second hand? I want an isofix base and the seat I seen maxicosi will be about €300 or over for both but seen someone selling one for €70 online for both. But as a ftm I dont want to if its not safe

    A car seat is one of the only pieces of baby equipment that you should never buy secondhand (unless perhaps from someone you can trust - a friend or family member.) If you're buying it from a stranger, no matter how genuine they seem, you just can't be sure that it has never been involved in a crash.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,382 ✭✭✭firestarter51


    A car seat is one of the only pieces of baby equipment that you should never buy secondhand (unless perhaps from someone you can trust - a friend or family member.) If you're buying it from a stranger, no matter how genuine they seem, you just can't be sure that it has never been involved in a crash.

    i make you right there, not worth the risk at all, shop around for a good price, they can vary from shop to shop.
    we got the isofix and its the best thing i ever got, so easy just drop it in and go.
    by the way, isofix are not needed for the first few weeks as the baby cant support their own head and the seat needs to be strapped in with the belt as flat as possible


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 776 ✭✭✭seventeen sheep


    Hmmm I've never heard that, anyone I know who has isofix has always used it from birth.


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,175 ✭✭✭angeldelight


    I really wouldn't recommend a second hand car seat, it's the most important safety equipment you'll have for your baby. Isofix is definitely ok from birth too...


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,162 ✭✭✭autumnbelle


    Thanks girls I might even just get the base and buy the seat new :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,323 ✭✭✭Roesy


    Hmmm I've never heard that, anyone I know who has isofix has always used it from birth.

    We were told that in our antenatal class, leaving the hospital and by Tony Kealys when we bought and picked up the travel system. We were told it was better to wait until their neck control was stronger.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,382 ✭✭✭firestarter51


    Hmmm I've never heard that, anyone I know who has isofix has always used it from birth.
    at our ante natal class we had an expert from tony kealys and the woman gave me this advice for the rear facing car seats, when the base is in the car seat is tilted forward and can result in the babies head flopping forward, if in a crash could result in a broken neck.
    im only quoting advice given to me by the experts


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  • Registered Users Posts: 5,175 ✭✭✭angeldelight


    Weird because someone in Tony Kealys told us to use base from birth. I'm going to one of those RSA check it fits events in a few weeks so I'll ask there


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,382 ✭✭✭firestarter51


    Weird because someone in Tony Kealys told us to use base from birth. I'm going to one of those RSA check it fits events in a few weeks so I'll ask there

    even if you look at a car seat on flat ground its level
    try it in the isofix and its tilted forward
    i was also under the impression it was from birth onward, i went to the shop and checked with another member of staff and she demonstrated the seat again and confirmed seat only for the first few weeks, usually 6 but depends on how strong the baby is.
    i could not fault the staff in kealys to be fair, i always thought they were expensive but they price matched everything for me and are very good with advice


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 776 ✭✭✭seventeen sheep


    at our ante natal class we had an expert from tony kealys and the woman gave me this advice for the rear facing car seats, when the base is in the car seat is tilted forward and can result in the babies head flopping forward, if in a crash could result in a broken neck.
    im only quoting advice given to me by the experts

    Yeah we had Tony Kealy himself speaking at our antenatal class, he never mentioned it. Neither did the person in the shop where we bought our Maxi-Cosi and base - in fact I specifically asked him when buying it whether one way or the other is safer, and he said that the seat is secured the same both ways, neither way is safer than the other, so I would have thought he'd have mentioned it then if the seatbelt was safer for the first few weeks. And there's no mention of it in the instructions, either.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,323 ✭✭✭Roesy


    Yeah we had Tony Kealy himself speaking at our antenatal class, he never mentioned it. Neither did the person in the shop where we bought our Maxi-Cosi and base - in fact I specifically asked him when buying it whether one way or the other is safer, and he said that the seat is secured the same both ways, neither way is safer than the other, so I would have thought he'd have mentioned it then if the seatbelt was safer for the first few weeks. And there's no mention of it in the instructions, either.

    That's bizarre. We were told it by a few different sources(independent antenatal class, 2 different members of staff in Tony Kealys, midwife in hospital) over the few months, as were friends of ours who had a baby a few weeks before us! My husband only collected ours the day he brought us home from the hospital and was so paranoid about doing the car seat right with the seatbelt that when the woman in TK's demonstrated again that he took a video on his phone. Only deleted it recently :D I'll be in there and a couple of other baby shops in the next few weeks looking at doubles and will see is that what they are still saying because it was definitely what they were saying 15-18 months ago. won't be doing an antenatal class this time so won't be able to compare there. Firestarter, you're not in Cork are you? Maybe they have different safety advice down here :) Seventeen Sheep, ours is a different seat to yours. Just checked instructions online and it isn't mentioned either. Would love to know the reason for the differing advice.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 776 ✭✭✭seventeen sheep


    Out of nosiness, I'm gonna ring Tony Kealys later and see what they recommend! :D It didn't really matter with our baby, as we didn't have a car until recently (he's a year old now) so I'm sure no damage was done on the odd short car spin in the first few weeks, but it would be good to know for future reference!

    Now that I think about it, we probably used the belt more than the base anyways in the first few months (too much time and effort to install the base in someone else's car!)


  • Registered Users Posts: 7,729 ✭✭✭Millem


    Would any of you buy a car seat second hand? I want an isofix base and the seat I seen maxicosi will be about €300 or over for both but seen someone selling one for €70 online for both. But as a ftm I dont want to if its not safe

    Autumn belle are you buying a travel system? If so you will get your isofix base and car seat at a good price.

    If not and if your are anywhere near mothercare outlet belgard tallaght, they had the maxi cosi cabriofix in raspberry for €109.99 2 weekends ago. You could buy the base secondhand?

    I sold my baby car seat and base on adverts for €100 a lot of people wanted it just for the base. The base has coloured indicators on it to show if it's installed properly. I took off all the covers for the buyer so they could see there was no damage to polystyrene on the actual car seat.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,382 ✭✭✭firestarter51


    To the question am I in cork
    Yes
    My seat was collected 5 months ago
    The woman told us we could leave the isofix base there till we needed it, it was part of the quinny travel system

    The seat is perfectly secure both ways.
    They showed me how tilted it is with the base, if anyone wants to believe me or not I'm not fussed.
    As we are first time parents we were keen to listen to advice given in the class and the shop.
    I was just saying to the person that wanted to buy a seat and base on a budget not to get a second hand one and she could get the base after a few weeks


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 776 ✭✭✭seventeen sheep


    To the question am I in cork
    Yes
    My seat was collected 5 months ago
    The woman told us we could leave the isofix base there till we needed it, it was part of the quinny travel system

    The seat is perfectly secure both ways.
    They showed me how tilted it is with the base, if anyone wants to believe me or not I'm not fussed.
    As we are first time parents we were keen to listen to advice given in the class and the shop.
    I was just saying to the person that wanted to buy a seat and base on a budget not to get a second hand one and she could get the base after a few weeks

    No one is disagreeing with you or disputing what you were told. :) It's just that different people seem to have been told different things, and as far as I know, it's not been mentioned in any of the carseat instruction manuals.

    Maybe the seat is more tilted on the base, but that doesn't mean dangerously so, and sure aren't babies often held at a higher angle while in parents' arms or in a bouncer or a sling? More tilted (with head support) doesn't necessarily mean it's in any way dangerous or damaging. (In a way, I kind of imagine being flatter would be even more damaging to the neck in the event of a head-on crash - as the head would be flung forward even further.)

    As I mentioned I'll be ringing Tony Kealys later, they know their stuff so I'll be interested to hear what they say.

    In fairness I've yet to hear of a baby ever being in any way negatively effected by parents using an Isofix base in the car from birth. I'm sure if it was a major issue, we'd have all heard about it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,382 ✭✭✭firestarter51


    No one is disagreeing with you or disputing what you were told. :) It's just that different people seem to have been told different things, and as far as I know, it's not been mentioned in any of the carseat instruction manuals.

    Maybe the seat is more tilted on the base, but that doesn't mean dangerously so, and sure aren't babies often held at a higher angle while in parents' arms or in a bouncer or a sling? More tilted (with head support) doesn't necessarily mean it's in any way dangerous or damaging. (In a way, I kind of imagine being flatter would be even more damaging to the neck in the event of a head-on crash - as the head would be flung forward even further.)

    As I mentioned I'll be ringing Tony Kealys later, they know their stuff so I'll be interested to hear what they say.

    In fairness I've yet to hear of a baby ever being in any way negatively effected by parents using an Isofix base in the car from birth. I'm sure if it was a major issue, we'd have all heard about it.
    It's if they are in a crash the babies ( new born) neck will go forward and possibly break
    It's nothing to do with being at an angle and having an effect on the child


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 776 ✭✭✭seventeen sheep


    OK I spoke to Tony Kealys, the woman I spoke to seemed very knowledgeable and helpful.

    It is to do with the car rather than to do with the make of the carseat. In different cars, the backseat may be slightly tilted (or not.) If the backseat is already tilted, they may advise the parents when fitting the seat to use belts rather than base for the first few weeks, to ensure that it's fitted the way it should be in line with manufacturer instructions.

    As regards whether it's better to have the seat more upright or flat in the first few weeks? She said, it's better for their necks if they are mostly kept lying as flat as possible in the early weeks, but she really stressed that in the case of a collision, it is absolutely best for the seat to be as upright as possible, to cushion the baby's back and head and neck as it's intended to do, rather than (in a flatter position) to have the head fly upwards/backwards depending on the angle/velocity of the crash, with nothing to support and cushion it. It makes sense. (Obviously this is talking about rear-facing infant seats.)

    She said it's six of one and half a dozen of the other - have the baby as flat as possible (more possible with belt) while their neck is still weak. Or else have the baby upright at an appropriate angle (using the base), to best protect them in the case of a collision.

    So what I got from it is, if I had a baby pretty much constantly in the car in the early weeks, maybe I'd consider using a seatbelt rather than base, and angling them slightly lower to avoid neck damage. But if, in the early weeks, they'd only be in the car occasionally and for short periods, I'd definitely be using the base to protect them as much as possible by having them at the correct angle to cushion them in the case of a collision.


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