Divorce costs

nodolan

gar32 wrote: »

Hi all,

Just wondering as I have my paperwork ready to go. Do I need to have all financial paper work i.e. pay slips and out goings etc before got to get stamp or will the writen information work? Ah the stress of it all.

Thanks a Million!!!

Gar32

It depends on whether or not there's going to be a claim of any sort for any kind of maintenance re: kids, property etc.

If there are financial matters involved then you'll need those docs Croc mentioned.

enry

I think its great the idea of doing your divorces yourself its so easy for people to take an objective view of whats going on during what can be a very difficult time in their life.

So your right NOdolan its better not to accept independent legal advice on such issues you can always do it cheap now and simply look back and regret it later.

nodolan

Hmmm. Three people who used my template documents have successfully completed their divorces and then there's me...with no regrets. Go figure!

gar32

I have all financial things done and dusted no kids property sort etc. Just going to get my freedom back and she is happy to help me Thanks for the advice I will do it next week and keep updated. Any one reading my need help like me

Regards Gar32

Lyonsie

Just back from a week of 'sunshine'. Letter from 'legal aid' waiting on doorstep, and my ex got one also.

"You will note that you have until the 26th of May 2009 within which to file your Appearance in the Circuit Court office" "Please note that if the Appearance is not filed and a copy received at this office on or before the above date, that I am instructed to issue as second Notice of Motion for Judgement in Default, and I will be applying to have the case transferred in to a Judges List for hearing on an uncontested basis.

Should he still write a letter, and can he hand it in any day. It would be the circuit court in Cork City.

Wishing all this paperwork was over.

candlehalo

Hi all - advice please if you can.
I've no kids - property sorted under a Judicial seperation in 2007 (I bought him out).We are seperated since early 2005 I want to go ahead and get the divorce. I haven't spoken to or seen my ex since the day in court for the judicial seperation, the last contact address for him was his parents, should I make contact with him before filing papers or just go ahead and send them to the parents address. I'll be doing this myself as I was cleaned out financially by the solicitors for the Judicial seperation. I'm in 2 minds about doing this and had always said if he wants it he can come looking for it, as I can't afford to give him any more money. Now my circumstances are changed and I want to cut that last connection off completely. any advice / help appreciated.
CH

Lyonsie

Any chance you would qualify for free-legal-aid! You won't know unless you ask. Make an appointement to see them, and bring all your financial 'bits' with you. It could make life very simple for you if you did qualify.

candlehalo

FLAC isn't an option, my main query would be should I contact him before I serve papers, I suppose it'd be out of courtesy more than a legal obligation but then he was never courteous to me
cheers
CH

Croc

candlehalo wrote: »

Hi all - advice please if you can.
I've no kids - property sorted under a Judicial seperation in 2007 (I bought him out).We are seperated since early 2005 I want to go ahead and get the divorce. I haven't spoken to or seen my ex since the day in court for the judicial seperation, the last contact address for him was his parents, should I make contact with him before filing papers or just go ahead and send them to the parents address. I'll be doing this myself as I was cleaned out financially by the solicitors for the Judicial seperation. I'm in 2 minds about doing this and had always said if he wants it he can come looking for it, as I can't afford to give him any more money. Now my circumstances are changed and I want to cut that last connection off completely. any advice / help appreciated.
CH

Be aware if you are talking "cut that last connection" from a legal point of view that does not happen with the divorce laws here. There is nothing to stop either party going back to the court if financial position etc changes. From what i know the only real thing divorce does in this country is allows you to remarry

candlehalo wrote: »

FLAC isn't an option, my main query would be should I contact him before I serve papers, I suppose it'd be out of courtesy more than a legal obligation but then he was never courteous to me
cheers
CH

There is no legal obligation to the best of my knowledge but as you say maybe do it out of courtesy.

Hunter S

candlehalo wrote: »

Hi all - advice please if you can.
I've no kids - property sorted under a Judicial seperation in 2007 (I bought him out).We are seperated since early 2005 I want to go ahead and get the divorce. I haven't spoken to or seen my ex since the day in court for the judicial seperation, the last contact address for him was his parents, should I make contact with him before filing papers or just go ahead and send them to the parents address. I'll be doing this myself as I was cleaned out financially by the solicitors for the Judicial seperation. I'm in 2 minds about doing this and had always said if he wants it he can come looking for it, as I can't afford to give him any more money. Now my circumstances are changed and I want to cut that last connection off completely. any advice / help appreciated.
CH

Candlehalo if you've already been though the Judicial Seperation it should be a matter of formality now for your Divorce. Its nowhere near as complicated as the Divorce would usually follow the same terms of the JS unless there is a significant reason not to. If you have any questions feel free to post them up and i'm sure one of many people will be able to help you out. There is a always a wealth of information on boards.

Bowenday

does anyone know the name of the divorce book mentioned in an earlier post? the person said it was 20 euro in easons.
thanks

nodolan

My apologies to those who sent me PMs over the last couple of weeks but I was away in Spain and had very limited internet access.

The link to the document templates is still live here:

http://rapidshare.com/files/207148991/DivorceDocs.zip

The book mentioned is called something like DIY Divorce and is probably less than 100 pages (so it's quite small) and it contains examples of documents. There is one mistake in the book (that I'm aware of) where it says you need to fill out an Affidavit of Means every time - this isn't so - you only need that document if there are shared means, property etc. or if someone is looking for maintenance.

Noel.

Bowenday

Noel - thanks a million for that, you are very good.

I just want to clarify something someone said earlier - you can't get Divorce papers from ANY court it must be a Circuit court.
HTH.

Evek

Hi Nodolan,

I sent a PM to you months ago regarding the forms for diy divorce (which I saved to my pc .... thanks for that).
I went into Easons today to ask for the book DIY Divorce, and was told it's out of print ..... :eek:

The info I'm gathering is for my other half .... he's been married for 30 years, separated for 7 years, we've been living together for 2 years. He has 3 children from the marriage, youngest being 21, and wifey got the house, but both consent to the divorce. Now, would he have to fill in the form regarding the kids, as they're all over 20, or not?

After reading through the threads, and my other halfs reluctance to get this divorce going, I think it's the fear element of venturing into the legal system, and getting things sooo wrong! But surely, if forms were not completed properly, they would not be submitted?

The thing that worries me, I think you quoted that 'divorce was not final' does that mean, if my other half and me get married, which we want to do, wifey still has a hold of him (so to speak)????

Sorry if questions and comments seem all over the place, just typing as questions pop into my head :rolleyes: !!

Thanks as always Noel for your help

nodolan

Hi Evek,

Wow! There's a lot in what you're asking there and I have to be an obvious' chicken' and preface my answer by saying that I'm not a solicitor nor a student of law - all I know is what I learned through my own research and experience of getting both a legal separation and a divorce by myself.

So, let's dig in.

As far as I know, once there is property and kids involved, regardless of any agreement (consensual or otherwise), the court will want the Affidavit of Means filled out. The Affidavit of Means is included in the download of documents in the link I provided previously as far as I remember but if it isn't reply to this post and I'll upload a sample (reason why I'm not checking is because I'm off to bed to rest from writing an MA thesis due on Monday).

The judge makes the final decision regardless of whether or not anyone asks for anything to be divvied up or whether or not anyone asks for maintenance so he (or she) will want that paperwork done.

You are right - if the forms are not completed correctly you will not get near a judge as the Registrar will let you know that your paperwork is not in order. My experience of the Registrar in Cork city was extremely positive and I have no reason to believe that your experience should be any different (as long as you have the right attitude).

As for divorce not being final - the Irish government bowed to pressure from the Catholic church with regard to the whole crappy 4 out of 5 years thing and to the non-finality of divorce. What it means is that either person can make a request to have the terms of a divorce revisited if their circumstances change radically. So say for instance a judge orders €200 per week to be paid in maintenance and the spouse in receipt of that payment suddenly finds himself or herself in long term dire circumstances (due to losing their job or sickness or whatever), or one of the ex-partners discovers that the other had a secret hoard of wealth (like an uncashed lottery jackpot cheque), then they can go back to the court and have the terms of the divorce redrawn - that's what non-finality of divorce in Ireland means (of course in almost every other country in the world divorce is totally final but not good old Ireland).

About the book (DIY Divorce) - personally speaking I didn't find it much help. I found mistakes in it that actually hindered my progress and I ended up actually reading law books in Cork city library that were hundreds of pages thick as well as consulting websites and a friendly legal secretary. The reason why I'm so confident about what I know is that I brought together numerous sources and took the best bits of them.

To be honest - I nearly pissed myself with fear the first time I went to court on my own but your partner doesn't need to be on his own since he has you. There's nothing a cigarette and coffee (or just a beer) won't put right after you get out of the courtroom.

All the best,

Noel.

p.s. Micheline McCormack's / Gay Gaynor's book might be available from the original publisher (I gave mine away):


Merlin Publishing:
http://www.merlinwolfhound.com/book_diydivorce.shtml

and have a read of this article in the Indo about the book:

D.I.V.O.R.C.E. is getting a D.I.Y. makeover

edit:

I think the person in Easons may have been telling a pork pie:

http://www.eason.ie/look/9781903582213/Diy-Divorce/McCormack-Micheline

€9.99 International delivery. Ships in approx. 3-5 days.

http://www.waterstones.com/waterstonesweb/displayProductDetails.do?sku=4617979

DIY Divorce by Micheline McCormack £10.00 Availability : Usually despatched in 7-10 days.

Evek

Once again Noel thank you soooo much!!

I always find it's better to ask someone who has been through the same wringer as yourself, because they know what the hell they're talking about, because they've been there and done it.

I did actually find the same link to Eason's website for ordering the book, so I came to the same conclusion as you

My other half has been quoted two to three THOUSAND euros for a solicitor to deal with the divorce ...... ridiculous money :eek:

I've just checked the link to the downloaded documents and what's included is;

Welfare affidavitt,
Civil bill,
Endorsement of Service,
Notice of motion.
Service of motion.

Now, do you have to complete ALL these documents in triplicate?

I know I'm a pest, but once again ..... thank you ...... you're a money saving genie :P

Yvonne

bluemountainz

Hi guys,

I'm in the about to start the process for obtaining a DIY divorce and I'm trying to get my head round what forms I need to lodge.

I've split from my ex-husband over 5 years ago (not legally seperated), joint property was sold at the time of seperation and there are no other financial ties, or children. As there is no maintenance payments or unresolved financial issues do I still need to lodge an Affadavit of Means?

nodolan

Hi bluemountainz,

No need for an Affidavit of Means. No ties, no property, no kids is great (as far as paperwork is concerned) - can we presume that it will also be uncontested? That's the biggie in a DIY divorce.

If it's not contested then the process is muy facil (very simple) and you just follow the instructions above. The links to the documents are still working if you want to use them.

Let us know if you need any more help.

Noel.

Burntwood

Any advice...

• I will be seperated 4years in April. Can I initiate proceedings now to get things going so I can be in court by early May or do I have to wait until the exact 4 years and start then?

• Realistically how long will the whole process take from when I submit the first documents?

• I own a property but he is not contesting this.

• We have a 10year old child. I receive €50 maintenance per week.

• My ex has mental health issues so he can be difficult to contact. Will he have to attend court? Or will he just have to send the letter saying he's not contesting?(which is the case)

Thanks anyone/everyone in advance for your help!

Burntwood

Thanks for that... Its really helpful

rx8

I have just completed this process today, and I would just like to add some useful information.

The staff in the family law office are very friendly and helpful and will point you in the right direction every step of the way.They will give you a diy pack of forms which are templates for what you'll need.

From start to finish it cost no more than €200 and took 12 weeks.

It was uncontested in every respect which was a great help and the ex didn't even turn up in court.

The BIG concern of judges nowadays seems to be with pension orders and a lot of the hearings are to do with this,so be warned,if things are not going well with your ex,then get a solicitor!

It was quite daunting, going into court alone and not knowing what to expect,but it all went very smoothly and the whole thing was over in less than 5 minutes.

Don't be afraid to do it yourself if you have agreement with your ex and enjoy being single again for a while at least.;)

maidhc

rx8 wrote: »

I have just completed this process today, and I would just like to add some useful information.

The staff in the family law office are very friendly and helpful and will point you in the right direction every step of the way.They will give you a diy pack of forms which are templates for what you'll need.

From start to finish it cost no more than €200 and took 12 weeks.

It was uncontested in every respect which was a great help and the ex didn't even turn up in court.

The BIG concern of judges nowadays seems to be with pension orders and a lot of the hearings are to do with this,so be warned,if things are not going well with your ex,then get a solicitor!

It was quite daunting, going into court alone and not knowing what to expect,but it all went very smoothly and the whole thing was over in less than 5 minutes.

Don't be afraid to do it yourself if you have agreement with your ex and enjoy being single again for a while at least.;)

<disclaimer>I'm a solicitor, but know less about family law than you do</disclaimer>

I really think that unless you have no assets to speak of (I do not mean this in a derogatory way), doing this yourself is ill advised. Even if things are going well with you ex, the advise you get from an experienced solicitor could be the cheapest thing you ever get in the long run.

jenzz

Just a quick question. We got legal seperation through mediation services in Dublin ( free) & very good I might add. My solicitor ( family member) just drew up the legal papers & we signed. Happy days - all sorted, kids house, the works.

We have lived apart ie seperated Nov 2006. The papers only got signed in Jan of this year as his solicitor messed us around ( even he will agree to that) so is it 4 years from Jan 09 or 4 years from Nov 06 that we can divorce?

Our man in Havana

November 06.

jenzz

Bond-007 wrote: »

November 06.

Deadly :D:D

Many thanks

nemo366

hi all

i really could do with some info. my partner has been seperated for 9 years but not legally. he now wants to st divorced. there is no house kids etc etc. his ex will not be contesting so everything is straightforward. we have rang the solicitor and they are way to expensive so we got a diy site who will do it for 550. this includes pension adjustment order. basically what i need to know has anyone used these sites and do they work. dont want tp apy 550 and have to go to solicitor anyway.

thanks

eagle_&_bear

nemo366 wrote: »

hi all

i really could do with some info. my partner has been seperated for 9 years but not legally. he now wants to st divorced. there is no house kids etc etc. his ex will not be contesting so everything is straightforward. we have rang the solicitor and they are way to expensive so we got a diy site who will do it for 550. this includes pension adjustment order. basically what i need to know has anyone used these sites and do they work. dont want tp apy 550 and have to go to solicitor anyway.

thanks

hi Nemo,
if you have a look at the posts on this thread, you'll see it does work, and if you follow the process, it works very simply and clearly.

if you both are in full agreement to this, then it can be done in a few weeks (usually 12 or so). look at divorceireland.com and also speak to FLAC and get some information there too.

one of the posters on this thread said s/he got out at 200 euro so that might help also.

Talk to FLAC and get a grounding in it.

For what it's worth and I work in criminal law, not family law, but friends do - the family courts are very friendly and very applicant-friendly. The courts know all too well how nervous and how afraid people get so they will help where possible too.

You would need to make sure issues like the family home, pension adjustment orders, maintenance etc are dealt with. Ideally if you and your ex could agree the terms in full (this may require you signing out of each others interests etc) it'll help when it comes to handing in the order you want from the court.

It's not terribly difficult and you can do it

Meeha

Firstly, thanks to all who have posted here. There is a wealth of information that I will definately be putting to good use. I hope to get the ball rolling this weekend. One problem, I'm not entirely sure where my ex is living, should I send the papers to his mothers address?

smcq

I want to agree with Meeha, this forum has provided me with both the tools and confidence to proceed with this myself. cheers to everyone involved

nodolan

rx8 wrote: »

I have just completed this process today, and I would just like to add some useful information.

The staff in the family law office are very friendly and helpful and will point you in the right direction every step of the way.They will give you a diy pack of forms which are templates for what you'll need.

From start to finish it cost no more than €200 and took 12 weeks.

It was uncontested in every respect which was a great help and the ex didn't even turn up in court.

The BIG concern of judges nowadays seems to be with pension orders and a lot of the hearings are to do with this,so be warned,if things are not going well with your ex,then get a solicitor!

It was quite daunting, going into court alone and not knowing what to expect,but it all went very smoothly and the whole thing was over in less than 5 minutes.

Don't be afraid to do it yourself if you have agreement with your ex and enjoy being single again for a while at least.;)

Just catching up rx8 and just want to thank you for your post and totally agree that the court staff were incredibly helpful (I brought them flowers and chocolates when it was all over to thank them and they were lost for words as no one had ever been that grateful LOL).

If you can have a friend with you in court (on both occasions) that would be great as I nearly wet myself with terror (and excitement).

Abouttime

nodolan, you've been very helpful on this topic so thank you for that. I've a couple of questions for you and was wondering if you could help. In one of your posts earlier on you say that you go to the registrar and give in the civil bill as the first step. But later on you say that you went to the solicitor first. I can't see anywhere on the civil bill that the solicitor needs to sign.
Also on the civil bill it says that if they don't want to contest it they do nothing but you said your ex wife needed to write a letter of consent for the divorce. Does my ex have to write a letter as I can pretty much take it that he won't just to annoy me.

Also do you know anything about how to apply for a pension adjustment order.
Thanks so much for all your advice so far your help is going to save me a lot of money.

nodolan

Abouttime wrote: »

nodolan, you've been very helpful on this topic so thank you for that. I've a couple of questions for you and was wondering if you could help. In one of your posts earlier on you say that you go to the registrar and give in the civil bill as the first step. But later on you say that you went to the solicitor first. I can't see anywhere on the civil bill that the solicitor needs to sign.
Also on the civil bill it says that if they don't want to contest it they do nothing but you said your ex wife needed to write a letter of consent for the divorce. Does my ex have to write a letter as I can pretty much take it that he won't just to annoy me.

Also do you know anything about how to apply for a pension adjustment order.
Thanks so much for all your advice so far your help is going to save me a lot of money.

Hola Abouttime,
You have to get a solicitor (or a Commissioner for Oaths (I think - not sure on that)) to sign/witness the part of the civil bill notice of motion that says there is no prospect of a resolution (costs around 10-20 euro depending on the solicitor).

No contest means they don't contest the divorce but for the sake of bureaucracy they must say they're not contesting - in most (straightforward) cases if a judge agrees that every attempt has been made to secure a 'no contest' but the respondent hasn't ahem 'responded' then the judge will allow the proceedings to go ahead.

I'm afraid I know nothing about pension orders.

Lo siento y lamento.

Noel.

maidhcII

Abouttime wrote: »

Also do you know anything about how to apply for a pension adjustment order.
Thanks so much for all your advice so far your help is going to save me a lot of money.

Again I'm going to preface this by saying I'm a solicitor albeit one with no knowledge of family law. We have however a couple of files in the office where DIY divorces went wrong, with various assets not dealt with properly. Our fees for sorting the mess will far exceed what we would have charged first time around because a simple matter has been converted into a complete mess.

I'm not saying don't go down the DIY route, but make sure you actually are saving money. Also, if money is actually a problem you should go to the Legal Aid Board, you will get the services of an excellent solicitor and it won't cost. You may have to wait, but in the case of a divorce time is rarely of the essence.

Also, make sure that potentially better options like civil nullity are not available to you.

nodolan

I was intrigued by the whole 'pension adjustment order' question and did some digging around and here are some interesting links:

http://www.citizensinformation.ie/categories/birth-family-relationships/separation-and-divorce/sep_divorce_pensions

http://www.pensionsboard.ie/index.asp?locID=328&docID=280

http://www.diydivorceireland.ie/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=25&Itemid=44

http://www.irishstatutebook.ie/1995/en/act/pub/0026/sec0012.html

http://www.traceysolicitors.ie/pensions.html

http://www.gallaghershatter.ie/documents/2007_01_03ARTICLE.maritalbreakdownandinheritrights.bgas.doc

http://www.legalaidboard.ie/lab/publishing.nsf/7a4c7e6aa25d28734a2569fa0000ed33/c0f68af24c677d46802571fd003bc324/$FILE/Leaflet%204%2030133.pdf

http://www.gallaghershatter.ie/documents/PensionAdjustmentOrders.pdf

http://www.revenue.ie/en/about/foi/s16/pensions/chapt22.pdf

After that I genuinely have no idea what you need to do and as the last poster said this may be something you do need a solicitor for - but again I would ask the court registrar for help or give the Pensions Board a call.

Noel

Abouttime

That's great thanks for that nodolan. When I rang a solicitor to see if they would witness it they feigned ignorance on DIY divorces and said they had never heard of anyone doing it. An answer I expected to hear from a solicitor. So I just want to make sure that I know what I'm talking about.
Just to clarify the following: -
There are 4 papers, family law civil bill, endorsement of service, notice of motion, service of motion. I'm getting the civil bill witnessed by a solicitor - they just sign beside no. 10 on 3 separate documents or one document and I can photocopy this 3 times?
When do the other 3 papers come into play?
Also how do I get the solicitor to sign the endorsement of service paper as I wouldn't know the date I sent it registered as do I have to go the court registrar to see if their correct? Do I have to go back and get them to witness it?

maidhcII - thanks for your input but my divorce is pretty straightforward. No assets, no children and a deed of waiver from the judicial separation. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't qualify for legal aid but the reason I'm not employing a solicitor is because for my divorce it's pretty straightforward and paying someone to do something so simple would annoy me. I've been quoted €3k for my divorce from the same solicitors who charged me nearly 20K to do my separation. 20K!!! I'd rather take my chances with doing my own divorce.

Our man in Havana

The endorsement of service is for proving when you posted the civil bill to the respondant. That does not happen for the moment. So on your first visit to the solicitor you are only getting the civil bill and notice of motion signed. You will return to the solicitor after you have posted the documents by registered post to have the other 2 documents signed.

ihatethis

I've found this forum very helpful and thks to you Nodolan in particular. I've downloaded your documents.

Am just at the early stages of trying to formalise a 5 month old seperation. Mediation broke down, ex would not make an offer of any maintenance and went the legal route.(dependent children )
Had what my sol said was a settlement meeting with sols & barrister for each. Here's a few tips based on this very woeful experience

1. Never agree a date 4 meeting until you have ex's documents in your hands. I was bounced into meeting and had very little time to review ex's documents which contained numerous errors. (solr kept putting off day for pick up)

2. Require a weeks notice for meeting. in my case, both my sol & barrister turned up late and then ex sol & barr had 2 go. Both excused themselves on basis of meeting being organised at short notice, So we were never going to agree anything! Think this fiasco has cost me €2k.

3. Organise the meeting outside of court hours e.g 4pm as that way barr wont have excuse of being called 2 court. It also makes it easier to get one of the private meeting rooms rather than discussing personal business in the open area!

4. Always bring a friend for support, as the tension in court is mind boggling

5. Always bring copies of all key documents- never ever assume your barr isters will bring them. mine did n't

6. Never ever get bounced into signing documents, no matter what pressure is applied.
I was told I had to sign a document 2 appoint the 2 sides familiy solr to act for a house sale. ex had withdrawn previous consent 4 nominated solr. I said okay if they would do the same/similar price deal 4 me. Told other solr would not give price "until seeing title", so I asked my solr was she asking me to sign something without knowing what the cost was? She would n't answer, just kept saying it wld be better if we had joint conveyancing? (She has supplied fixed price which was more expensive)
Yet from reading this forum, it seems it is actually illlegal for a solicitor not to advise of fees in advance !!!
Can't believe the pressure applied to sign , should have just said - this is too much, I'll need to take it away, instead to trying to be logical

7. Vouching of documents must be on 12 month basis. My solr told me it was okay 2 do on 6 month basis and would agree with ex solr. She did not and now my ex thinks I've submitted fradulent document!

8. Even if using solr & barr, invest time & learn legal procedures. You've got to act as your own project manager & expert as your legal people won't. some examples

I was told ex was going 2 issue papers for a judicial seperation and only when I challenged this, saying I had been told we were here for a settlement meeting under a deed of seperation(much cheaper and judge does not make decision for u) was it agreed they would hold off until we do vouching.

Told I should continue 2 let my ex have my tax credits/std bands as my income low and stay with joint assessment. had to explain seperate ass to them.( each person taxed as seperate, but right of transfer of credits/bands at year end)

Now I really need to decide how I go with this as they all seem to be planning , yet another of these inefficient, time wasting and stressful meetings & my ex seems 2 be placing complete faith in them.

If I ran my business like this, I'd would n't have lasted a month!

maidhcII

ihatethis wrote: »

I've found this forum very helpful and thks to you Nodolan in particular. I've downloaded your documents.

Am just at the early stages of trying to formalise a 5 month old seperation. Mediation broke down, ex would not make an offer of any maintenance and went the legal route.(dependent children )
Had what my sol said was a settlement meeting with sols & barrister for each. Here's a few tips based on this very woeful experience

1. Never agree a date 4 meeting until you have ex's documents in your hands. I was bounced into meeting and had very little time to review ex's documents which contained numerous errors. (solr kept putting off day for pick up)

2. Require a weeks notice for meeting. in my case, both my sol & barrister turned up late and then ex sol & barr had 2 go. Both excused themselves on basis of meeting being organised at short notice, So we were never going to agree anything! Think this fiasco has cost me €2k.

3. Organise the meeting outside of court hours e.g 4pm as that way barr wont have excuse of being called 2 court. It also makes it easier to get one of the private meeting rooms rather than discussing personal business in the open area!

4. Always bring a friend for support, as the tension in court is mind boggling

5. Always bring copies of all key documents- never ever assume your barr isters will bring them. mine did n't

6. Never ever get bounced into signing documents, no matter what pressure is applied.
I was told I had to sign a document 2 appoint the 2 sides familiy solr to act for a house sale. ex had withdrawn previous consent 4 nominated solr. I said okay if they would do the same/similar price deal 4 me. Told other solr would not give price "until seeing title", so I asked my solr was she asking me to sign something without knowing what the cost was? She would n't answer, just kept saying it wld be better if we had joint conveyancing? (She has supplied fixed price which was more expensive)
Yet from reading this forum, it seems it is actually illlegal for a solicitor not to advise of fees in advance !!!
Can't believe the pressure applied to sign , should have just said - this is too much, I'll need to take it away, instead to trying to be logical

7. Vouching of documents must be on 12 month basis. My solr told me it was okay 2 do on 6 month basis and would agree with ex solr. She did not and now my ex thinks I've submitted fradulent document!

8. Even if using solr & barr, invest time & learn legal procedures. You've got to act as your own project manager & expert as your legal people won't. some examples

I was told ex was going 2 issue papers for a judicial seperation and only when I challenged this, saying I had been told we were here for a settlement meeting under a deed of seperation(much cheaper and judge does not make decision for u) was it agreed they would hold off until we do vouching.

Told I should continue 2 let my ex have my tax credits/std bands as my income low and stay with joint assessment. had to explain seperate ass to them.( each person taxed as seperate, but right of transfer of credits/bands at year end)

Now I really need to decide how I go with this as they all seem to be planning , yet another of these inefficient, time wasting and stressful meetings & my ex seems 2 be placing complete faith in them.

If I ran my business like this, I'd would n't have lasted a month!

Best post on the thread, and this is coming from a Solicitor. Sometimes we seem to treat clients with disregard and disrespect that is completely out of order.

ihatethis

Best post on the thread, and this is coming from a Solicitor. Sometimes we seem to treat clients with disregard and disrespect that is completely out of order.

Thanks maidhcII, it's nice to know that a solicitor feels what happened is unacceptable.

I think we all need to start politely objecting in writing when solicitors are unprofessional.

Bowenday

We got our divorce last week - thanks for advice gained here. We didn't use a solicitor. We have kids and there was property to sort. We didn't have a legal separation either, just a mediated agreement which had changed a lot.
We sorted everything out between us and agreed things like pension, maintenance etc.
If you can talk to each other there is no reason to add the expense of a solicitor. At the end of the day, if your paperwork is in order and you are realistic about what each person gets/are willing to compromise, there is no reason not to DIY.
Good luck to anyone embarking on it. Get your paperwork done and accept any help from the workers in the Court's office. We found them incredibly helpful and patient.
It's a relief it is over cos it is stressful in lots of ways, no doubt.

mollie006

The information on these threads was invaluable. The forms NoDolan provided were exactly what were needed and accepted by the Court with no difficulty.

My boyfriend had a legal separation 10 years ago. In finding out that his ex-wife still had rights over him, let's say he was in a coma, made him go for the divorce.

The forms supplied on here, when followed exactly with the instructions for mailing and signing by the Court, made it a painless process. He started March 1st and was granted a divorce March 26th.

Total cost: 34 Euro.

If there are no issues that warrant a judge, this is the way to go.

Thank you No for helping so many people. All the best to you in your new marriage!

Our man in Havana

Well done.

nodolan

mollie006 wrote: »

Thank you No for helping so many people. All the best to you in your new marriage!

Thank you, and thank you for your feedback, and congratulations on the divorce.

I missed your post Bowenday - congrats (yes it can be very stressful which is why I've recommended a couple of times that you have someone with you and you might want to go for a 'wee dram' after, plus, even if it is amicable it's still the end of something serious and the beginning of something great (hopefully) and so it can be quite an emotional time for many).

Noel.

Kegger

Hi folks,

my story...
Judicial Seperation 5 years ago and now looking to get divorced.
I've been trying to get solicitors to call me back for past two weeks to get an idea of costs etc. but so far they all appear to have enough business :mad:. This is after ruling out solicitors without good recommendations, been stung once too many times.

Anyway, stumbled onto this thread and am thinking it's worth a shot to try this on my own. I'm working in Dublin City and was thinking of going to the courts here or do people think it might be easier outside the city (I live near Drogheda).

Any advice appreciated.

Our man in Havana

If you have a JS and are both on speaking terms there is no reason why you can't do it yourself.

Kegger

Bond-007 wrote: »

If you have a JS and are both on speaking terms there is no reason why you can't do it yourself.

JS is grand and included the bit where we no longer claim anything from the other.
Not so sure about the speaking terms, it's been a while and I'm building up the courage to make contact - hopefully she's cool about it.

Vinny-Chase

Hey guys,
Have tried downloading the nodolan's template files but the rapidshare link has expired. Can any one supply the files?

Many thanks.

Vinny-Chase

Many thanks for that Noel.

Vinny-Chase

Ok guys, here I go I'm jumping in. Looks straight forward enough. A couple of things I've come across which I'm hoping some people might be able to provide assistance with.

Regarding:
Affidavit of Means
"In each case where financial relief is sought an Affidavit of Means must be filed."

Do you have to submit this if no money is being sought? Maintenance for children has been as directed by the Welfare/ Maintenance Dept. No assets involved or anything else.

Thanks guys.

dodohert

To nodolan & all contributors to this thread I found it encouraging so many of you went the DIY route & suceeded.

I'm posting this in case there is anyone out there in a similar situation as myself I will provided updates if ppl are interested to hear how its going.

I have now embarked on my own mission to obtain a divorce via DIY route however mine is not as clear cut for example we have a property which I live in & pay the mortgage & insurances on every month without fail since she moved out and I moved in almost 3 years now. It is up for sale by mutal consent and there's quite a bit of equality in it should it sell.
neither of us looked for a legal separation nor is one needed to apply for a divorce but i realise now it could have make things easier for the divorce application.

We have 1 child and a maintenance order is in effect, I've experiance family law court room and I'm well able to speak for myself so I'm not as daunted going in there again. I've read the divorce act from start to finish I woiuld say i have a pretty solid understanding.

It seems one big point to be prevalant in such actions is that of pension funds which I'm glad is not an issue for me as we have none.

My ex says she has no objection with me applying for divorce (she has a new life now with some one else as do I) and she tells me doesn't want to appear in court either, she has applied for legal aid/advice (FLAC), but this has a waiting list, maybe somone can answer this for me....does this mean my application could be held up while she waits for a legal aid to be provided ?

I do have access to a solicitor but soley for advice she has and continues to advise me on the matter and stamp whatever docs need stamping but thats it.

I've lodge my civil bill the court clerk was very helpful indeed and said all my documents were in order in fact I have received them back stamped & signed by the county registar again so far all in order.
I've sent by registerd post the civil bill but have to wait ten days before lodging an 'Affidavit of Service' proving I posted it, then I believe thereafter I will get a date for an initial hearing in front of the County registar.
I was further encouage to read a post by Bowenday who sucsessfully obtained a decree via DIY in circumstances similar to mine.

I'm well aware of the fact the welfare of our child comes first & foremost, I accept there could be comprimises in that regard.

Wish me luck.