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Two Australians working on a building site

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  • 29-10-2007 3:29pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 1,657 ✭✭✭


    There were two Australians working on building site, many floors up on the scaffolding. One says to the other

    "Bladdy 'Ell, mate, Oi'm doiyin' for a piss, but I couldn't be bothered cloimbin' all the way down to use the portaloo!"

    The other says, "No bother, just walk out to the edge a' that plank a' wood! Piss over the edge, Oi'll stand on this side to weigh it down so it doesn't fall ova!"

    So the Aussie walks out to the edge of the plank and starts to urinate off of it. Just then, the lunch bell goes, and the guy who was supposed to be weighing the plank down on the scaffolding forgets, and walks off. The plank topples over from weight of the bloke pissing and he plummets to his death.




    Some time later, three fellas of varying nationality are sitting in a bar, discussing women and how much they are pursued in their own countries.

    The Englishman says

    "I say, we English have been known to miss a game of football for a bird..."

    The Frenchman says

    "Zat is nossing! We French chase ze women with zest, and give zem ze gifts of love!"

    The Australian says

    "That's nothin', mate! A couple o' months ago, Oi was walkin' down the street with two gorgeous sheilas under me arms, when this bloke comes fallin' outta the sky, with his dick in his hand, shouting 'CUUUUUUNT!!'"


Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 12,599 ✭✭✭✭machiavellianme


    How unfunny. Dont get why nationality had anything to do with that. Nor do I see any humour. Only one Terrible star for you.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,184 ✭✭✭Fey!


    I like!!!


  • Registered Users Posts: 15,117 ✭✭✭✭MrJoeSoap


    Two gorgeous what?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 16,793 ✭✭✭✭Hagar


    Sheilas? The terrors of sloppy cut and paste.

    Machiavellianme please read the Charter. If you feel a thread only merits a single star that's fine, otherwise please limit your critique.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,626 ✭✭✭Kat1170


    4 stars, even with the missing words.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,657 ✭✭✭komodosp


    D'OH! Wasn't a cut and paste (which is why the missing word)

    F***ked that one up... (edited now)
    Dont get why nationality had anything to do with that

    Not going to start analysing why jokes are funny now, it kind of ruins them...


  • Registered Users Posts: 686 ✭✭✭mickrourke


    komodosp wrote: »

    Not going to start analysing why jokes are funny now, it kind of ruins them...

    fair play to ya!
    good joke too


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 500 ✭✭✭mc nuggets


    komodosp wrote: »



    Not going to start analysing why jokes are funny now, it kind of ruins them...
    Good on ya mate humors like a frog when you dissect it it dies

    Good joke anyway


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,555 ✭✭✭SuperSean11


    mc nuggets wrote: »
    Good on ya mate humors like a frog when you dissect it it dies

    Well put:D


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,422 ✭✭✭Fenix


    Liked it!


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 668 ✭✭✭karen3212


    he he, I liked the accents in words too


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