looking for the cure

Mr Jinx

somepeople spend their lives looking for the cure for cancer or didicate their work trying to cure aids, but not me. Im determined to find a cure for the affliction that has plauged men for years.....that chafing of the skin underneath your sack.
sack rash, crotch rot, whatever you want to call it
what causes it ?....sweat, hair, bad underwear
these are answer i hope to find during my research.
In the name of science let me hear your horror stories.

longshanks

ever tried washing?

Karl Hungus

Can't say this has ever affected me.

I have to agree with Longshanks, try washing regularly.

ansionnachclist

I also can't say that I get itchy balls on a regular basis.
Try a different shampoo :P.

Hagar

Try your local golf club, they usually have a ball washer.
The guy at my club is excellent, very thorough.
Leaves no stone unturned.

Goldenquick

You may be allergic to the washing powder you are using at present, try a different one to see if it helps.

Excercise is the cause. The solution is to sit on your ass and do nothing but drink and eat pork scratchings

Jesus Wept

No idea what you are on about tbh.

Zaph

Join a club, go travelling or take up a new hobby.

The Hill Billy

This is a fairly common ailment caused by nadiccii mite.

First, prepare the affected region by washing well with soapy water. Next, dry the area with a coarse cloth. The nadiccii mite feeds on dead skin cells & you need to remove as much of these as possible. Ensure that the affected area is a rosy-red & gleaming as possible.

Now that the area has been prepared you must immediately apply the first course of treatment - this is a solution of acetic acid (Sarsons Malt Vinegar is best). Apply liberally with a coarse cloth every 5 minutes for half an hour. Be sure to get into all the cracks & crevices where the nadiccii mite expecially favours & rub in well.

The second course involves applying 8-methyl-N-vanillyl-6-nonenamide to the especially sensitive areas. To do this, split a scotch bonnet chili in two & tape each half to a bollock. If they slip off - use a dab of super-glue to hold them in place. Now make yourself a pair of pants from clingfilm & sit back & let the magic work.

Dr H. Billy

jester77

Mr Jinx wrote: »

somepeople spend their lives looking for the cure for cancer or didicate their work trying to cure aids, but not me. Im determined to find a cure for the affliction that has plauged men for years.....that chafing of the skin underneath your sack.
sack rash, crotch rot, whatever you want to call it
what causes it ?....sweat, hair, bad underwear
these are answer i hope to find during my research.
In the name of science let me hear your horror stories.

Stop sleeping with strange women :rolleyes:

Slow Motion

Tom ! There Is Another One Of Those Funny Threads ! Do Something !

cance

heard about this "crutch rot" in the pub a few months ago, sounds like a nasty little rash. i was to understand that it was a similar bug to athletes foot, visit a chemist, get a spray.

I'd put a gag in yer mouth if i were you if you've been scratching hard, apparantly he screamed the house down the first few applications.

The Hill Billy

Reminds me of that ancient chinese proverb:
"He who goes to bed with itchy hole should not bite fingernails in morning."

Hagar

Confuscious say "Man who go to bed with itchy hole wake up with smelly finger."

Kazobel

The Henderson Equine Castrating Instrument is your only man, that'll sort out your problem for you in no time :D

***Kazobel listens for the noise of 2000 testicles retract in fear***

remus808

They're slippery buggers.

pretty-in-pink

Something that doesn't affect us wimmins (thank god)

Victor

Goldenquick wrote: »

You may be allergic to the washing powder you are using at present, try a different one to see if it helps.

Ah, thats where he might be going wrong. Most Irish lads use bars of soap or shower gel or the likes when washing. These foreign powder soaps might be causing an allergic reaction.

Hagar

Bloody Polish soaps are rotting our balls. :mad:

Slow Motion

Just give them up and become a woman ! Now toddle off to the fridge and get me a beer chicken !

Kazobel

Slow Motion wrote: »

Just give them up and become a woman !

Yeah sure if he wants advice about how to go about that I can sort him out :D

pretty-in-pink

Slow Motion wrote: »

Just give them up and become a woman ! Now toddle off to the fridge and get me a beer chicken !

Beer chicken? like calling him chicken (awwww) or some sort of new food group? Tell me more so-mo, tell me more.....

Slow Motion

pretty-in-pink wrote: »

Beer chicken? like calling him chicken (awwww) or some sort of new food group? Tell me more so-mo, tell me more.....

Sorry left a comma out, I don't think chicken flavoured beer would go down to well in the bar

pretty-in-pink

I was thinking beer flaoured chicken......Like a new alcoholic way to spice up Sunday lunch

Slow Motion

pretty-in-pink wrote: »

I was thinking beer flaoured chicken......Like a new alcoholic way to spice up Sunday lunch

Ah ! You might be on to something there !

pretty-in-pink

Yes, and to think, you could have taken the credit.....

Zaph

pretty-in-pink wrote: »

I was thinking beer flaoured chicken......Like a new alcoholic way to spice up Sunday lunch

You mean like beer-can chicken? Supposed to be excellent.

pretty-in-pink

Man I want some chicken, and beer, and roast spuds. and gracy, and stuffing. and carrots, and peas, and yorkshire pudding. and beer