Good Advice

mickrourke

Husbands: Avoid arguments with your wife about lifting the toilet seat. Just p*ss in the sink.

Nissan Micra Drivers. Attach a lighted sparkler to the roof of your car before starting a long journey. You drive it like a bumper car anyway, so it might as well look like one.

Wives: Give your husband the James bond look by humming the 007 theme tune and looking at him through a toilet roll insert.

Oversleeping? Place a mousetrap on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from going back to sleep.

Parents, make kiddies bath times as fun as a trip to the seaside: put a bucket of sand, a bag of salt and a dog turd in the water.

Men: Create instant designer stubble by sucking a magnet and dipping your chin in a bowl of Iron fillings

3rd strike, I'm outta here