Suspicions confirmed... she's dumped!

MugMugs

Mighty_Mouse wrote: »

It means that he guarantee's his dignity, guarantee's that he will have zero regrets on how he handled himself when emotional f*cked.

As for bills etc.
Im presuming they dont have kids & house.

After that whats a few quid here and there over the course of a 4 year relationship.

Even take for example; if she owed him a grand.
- If she's honest enough to pay it back, she will.
- If not, yer never gonna get it & all its gonna cost you is serious hardship.
Bitter, twisted rows over money plus a break-up?
Forget about it.
Write it off over the course of a 4 year relationship its not much.
Write it off against the hassle of going looking for it.

Mighty Mouse ( or fellow MM ) I do agree with you and it is truly admirable to see a young man retain his dignity in the manner he has...... If I had my time back things would be oh so different but regardless of this fact we are all but human beings and I dont really think I am completely wrong in saying, We all have moments of weakness and moments where we say " What if " What if she was telling the truth..... What if the sea is pink....

I dumped a girl under the same scenario once and gladly was strong like the OP and kept my dignity however there were times when I nearly blew it and picked up the phone and it took enourmous strenght to withstand the urge....

Fair play to you all in all.... You will look back in this in a few years and a bit more experience under your belt and be glad that you effectively had the last laugh !

I speak from experience.

Wibbs

Well I've been absent from these parts for a while, but I must say I'm impressed by the OP's strength in the face of obvious hurt, so I'll add my kudos to this. Fair play.

eamon234

banman567 wrote: »

Yep got home at 1 had my stuff packed up left at about half 4 went to my parents.

Mobile kept ringing, so did house phone. deleted her and her work friends from bebo and made my page private. Will be headin to kilkenny this weekend to a couple of mates for some creamy guinness!! Dont want to talk to her and wont be talking to her

Fair play OP you're a ledge - strangely enough I haven't drank Guinness in 10 years but I feel an uncontrollable urge for one now - hope this whole scenario hasn't been an elaborate marketing experiment!

LegacyUser

Jesus fair play...good strength all round...

HashSlinging

What if your man set this up, the photo etc, 4 years is a long time to break up over something that could be meaningless. Your right in you reaction but I think you are making a judgment on past experiances.

Your playing right into this guys hands by reacting like this, I think its a total setup by him. If she's trying to make this much contact she must be sorry, if she wasnt sorry she wouldnt bother.

Cool the jets, and see what she's got to say for herself.

K_P

HashSlinging wrote: »

What if your man set this up, the photo etc, 4 years is a long time to break up over something that could be meaningless. Your right in you reaction but I think you are making a judgment on past experiances.

Your playing right into this guys hands by reacting like this, I think its a total setup by him. If she's trying to make this much contact she must be sorry, if she wasnt sorry she wouldnt bother.

Cool the jets, and see what she's got to say for herself.

A set up by the other guy? He can set it up all he wants, but she was still the one sucking the face off him! That was her doing and no one else can be blamed for it.

In terms of it being meaningless, the other guy probably was just a bit of fun to her, nothing to take seriously. But I'm pretty sure the OP doesn't see the bare-faced lies she told as meaningless. And of course she's sorry. She's been caught out in (for her) the worst possible way. Just because she's trying to contact OP doesn't even remotely lessen what she did. :mad:

Wibbs

HashSlinging wrote: »

What if your man set this up, the photo etc, 4 years is a long time to break up over something that could be meaningless.

Possible, but unlikely.

Your right in you reaction but I think you are making a judgment on past experiances.

Generally a good way to make a judgement.

If she's trying to make this much contact she must be sorry, if she wasnt sorry she wouldnt bother.

Oh I'd say she's sorry alright. It's why she's sorry that's the thing. Guilt, "I want to explain.....", she needs "closure", or it is possible of course that she's truly sorry, loves the OP and wants to make a fresh start. If that's the case she'll cross hell or high water to fix this. Given that she's the one that's made the problem, she has to be the one to fix it. If he folds now, she'll probably pull this or other crap again. If nothng else she respects him now. If he does go back on this and do an about face, she won't.

cowzerp

HashSlinging wrote: »

If she's trying to make this much contact she must be sorry, if she wasnt sorry she wouldnt bother.
.

So what if she is sorry!
whats that got to do with anything?
She's sorry she got caught..
If you do contact her again i'd tell her what i thought of her..

CrazyNoob

HashSlinging wrote: »

Your playing right into this guys hands by reacting like this, I think its a total setup by him. If she's trying to make this much contact she must be sorry, if she wasnt sorry she wouldnt bother.

To right she is sorry , Sorry she was caught out that is!!!!!
IMO she is only making contact to ease her guilt and try to feed the OP full of BS.

Also she iis contacting to try to save face, and make sure OP doesnt blacken her name etc

I'm delighted that OP isnt listening to her pityful sob story and total BS
To the kerb with her post haste

Hail 2 Da Chimp

Fair play OP, you've handled it pretty well.

wildgazelle

"Commitment isn,t the time you spend.It,s a line you cross"

HashSlinging

Fairplay lads your very right, the whole "bebo" thing is kinda sick, but its worked in the favour of the OP and he's handling himself very well, and is completely right.

py2006

I'd love an update on this one!

OP, have you seen/spoken to "yur wan" since? There is that phase you go through after a breakup were you ache to see/talk to them again. Its a moment of weakness. I hope you don't let your guard down.

gabgab

wildgazelle wrote: »

"Commitment isn,t the time you spend.It,s a line you cross"

That is brilliant...... Absolutely brilliant!!!

Moojuice

OP You are a legend in my book. That is how all cheaters should be dealt with. Seriously, keep at it. Ignore her. I have been in that situation before and I wish I could have done things so coolely. Let her suffer not you. Best of luck with it and if you dont mind, keep us updated. Once again fair ****s!

LegacyUser

This thread has taken me back quite a few years. I was in a four year relationship which never started, ran or finished right, there were a few break-ups and make-ups along the way and far to many "serious" chats in the car late at night... Anyway, long story short, she f**ked about on me (several times during our relationship) and I did the same on her (repeatedly), but neither of us wanted apart, but weren't that happy together either. There was little or no trust or respect really once the cheating started.

Eventually, got the hell out of there and found someone new who I eventually married and lived happily ever after!

OP, I think you've turned a corner - keep walking and don't look back... dunno what age you or her are, but am blown away by the maturity and cool-headedness of the (ongoing) response, "fair play" badge in the post to you!

RuailleBuaille

OP I would really like to hear how you are getting on, has your determination lasted?

Drummerboy2

ItchyInside wrote: »

OP I would really like to hear how you are getting on, has your determination lasted?

Reckon he is making his to Kilkenny. Here's hoping he has a cracking time, he deserves it.

padser

Hopefully kilkenny went well.......:rolleyes:

PullMyFinger!

This guy deseves the Freedom Of The City.

Above all else I think keeping your dignity during a breakup is paramount and the OP did that and some more. My upmost respect to you sir

PullMyFinger!

Any updates OP?