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Lawyer-Witness

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  • 16-12-2007 2:09am
    #1
    rocky25
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,521 ✭✭✭


    Lawyer: Did you blow your horn or anything?
    Witness: After the accident?
    Lawyer: Before the accident.
    Witness: Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it.

    Lawyer: How old is your son? The one living with you.
    Witness: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
    Lawyer: How long has he lived with you?
    Witness: Forty-five years.

    Lawyer: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?
    Witness: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
    Lawyer: And why did that upset you?
    Witness: My name is Susan.

    Lawyer: How was your first marriage terminated?
    Witness: By death.
    Lawyer: And by whose death was it terminated?

    Lawyer: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in the voodoo or occult?
    Witness: We both do.
    Lawyer: Voodoo?
    Witness: We do.
    Lawyer: You do?
    Witness: Yes, voodoo.

    Lawyer: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
    Witness: Yes.
    Lawyer: And what were you doing at that time?

    Lawyer: What is your date of birth?
    Witness: July fifteenth.
    Lawyer: What year?
    Witness: Every year.

    Lawyer: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?
    Witness: Yes.
    Lawyer: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
    Witness: Yes, sir.
    Lawyer: What did she say?
    Witness: She said 'What disco am I at?'

    Lawyer: Mr. Smith, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn't you?
    Witness: I went to Europe, Sir.
    Lawyer: And you took your new wife?

    Lawyer: You say the stairs went down to the basement?
    Witness: Yes.
    Lawyer: And these stairs, did they go up also?

    Lawyer: She had three children, right?
    Witness: Yes.
    Lawyer: How many were boys?
    Witness: None.
    Lawyer: Were there any girls?

    Lawyer: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
    Witness: Yes.
    Lawyer: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
    Witness: I forget things.
    Lawyer: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?

    Lawyer: Can you describe the individual you saw?
    Witness: He was about medium height and had a beard.
    Lawyer: Was this a male, or a female?


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