what to wear

LegacyUser

I am male 45

I like to dress smart all the time wear a tie/shirt/trousers. My gf says it makes me look older.It came to a head when i wanted to buy a cord jacket. It is shaped like a suit jacket but gf says that is a blazer and went out years ago.I have a friend who wears one and he is my age.

I wear tie/suit at work and gf says it is ok at work but I should be more casual/sweatshirt or open neck shirt when not working

I have a thing about open neck shirts and always have to wear a tie, even if I wear jeans.Gf says i make my self look older.but i do not like people in tracksuits but i recognise their right to dress as they like.

I would be thankful for any feedback

Gordon

Moved from PI. OP you can't reply here if you are unregistered, keep that in mind.

Gyalist

I don't think that this is a fashion issue as such, but more of a power struggle taking place in the relationship.

gogo

Sorry -but power struggle or not, it is a bit anal to have your top button closed with tie on a night out - loosen up man, wear your shirt, take off the tie and open the top button at least, opening a button or two is not the equivalent of wearing a tracksuit.
What age are you as a matter of interest.

jdivision

He already said he was 45. OP, closed shirt and tie with jeans. Come on. Don't know what line of business you're in but I deal with loads of business people and open tied shirts with suits are now the norm. What about jeans and a t-shirt when you go out.

pinklady2

As you have been a wearing a tie with a shirt for so long it will be hard to get used to not wearing one. To be honest if my BF wore the same style all the time I wud be very annoyed aswell..

Try wearing a shirt and jeans as suggested with nice shoes try TK Maxx lovely clothes for Men have all types from smart to casual and try Jack and Jones they do lovely shirts and casual tops/jumpers/t-shirts/jeans.
get all my Dads presents from Jack and Jones he is a little older then you and he loves their stuff.

MajorMax

I'm 38 and I wear combats and Jeans at home and shirt and tie at work, but if you're not comfortable in casual clothes then don't wear them I'd suggest some dockers and maybe a buttondown shirt, what most people call "Smart-casual".

Don't let anyone bully you, your signifigant other will try to change you, that's what they do they fall in love with someone, change everything about them and then wonder why they fell in love in the first place

Pigletlover

I know if you're used to dressing a certain way it can be hard to 'dress down', but maybe try losing the tie outside of work and opening your top button, it looks more relaxed. Jeans and a shirt can still look smart without being too formal. My boyfriend has one of those jackets that you described and it looks really well over a shirt and a pair of jeans. He's a good bit younger than you too so they're not just for old men, so if you like it go for it (just don't get one of those double breasted, suit material ones with big gold buttons and you'll be fine ).

Dizzyblonde

The casual blazer-type jacket is definitely not gone out of style, in fact it looks very well with jeans or casual trousers. Maybe a linen-look one would be nicer than cord though, it'll soon be spring.
You're going to have to lose the tie though, and open a top button. A navy or black sweater over an open-necked shirt is very smart casual too, and if you get used to it then you can branch out and buy more daring colours.
I'm around your age and I know what you mean about men in tracksuits in middle-age, it's not a good look outside the gym. Ben Sherman do lovely polo shirts that look really well with jeans.
When I met my husband he wore suits all the time, but he got used to wearing more casual clothes outside of work and has developed his own style. So I get where your girlfriend is coming from, but don't let her talk you into wearing anything too trendy, work out what suits you best.

il gatto

Shirt and tie with jeans? THat's not dressing smartly. That's a fashion faux pás for even the most conservative gentleman. Try a pair or chinos or moleskins (it's cold this time of year) with a check or gingham shirt with a crew or shallow v-neck jumper. Colour wise go with cream trousers, black, blue or red checks on white for the shirt and a black jumper. I know thats a very concise answer to a much bigger question, but if your that unsure about opening the top button of your shirt, sweeping answers about finding your own style won't help (nobody has said that, I stress). Just try the look I suggested and then try changing elements of it when you become more comfortable with it. Really, outside of a casual looking suit, I can't think of any other informal time you should wear a tie.
I hate the shirt and tie with random trousers look. Always looks like someone who couldn't be bothered to wear a suit or a barman or something.

howaya

hello OP - I think your style principles are to be commended. You are dressing like a man who is to be taken seriously.
I am dying to meet the girl who'll try to change the way I dress!

If I may say, I agree with other posts here that your gf was wrong about the jacket. A good jacket is the bread-and-butter of men's clothes.

But, since you are dressing like a gent, you'll be gentle in responding to her, so you could consider softening things a little with simple button-down collar shirts, or wool/silk ties; and perhaps try shoes that are less serious, like suede or 'camper' or deck shoes.

If you want to be a B*&tard, you could always softly comment that you think she looks a little scruffy from time to time

il gatto

Agreed. Any time she wears something you think looks bad, tell her. Tell her it's cheap or frumpy of makes her look like a skanger. She's been only too willing to tell you she doesn't like your clothes, so do the unthinkable and tell a woman she looks ridiculous. It's all about equality these days so let rip.:D (lose the tie with jeans though;))