In your 20s? Everyone you know becoming boring sods?

Pauleeeeeeee

At the ripe old age of (nearly) 22 it’s beginning to depress me somewhat to see how much of a slave friends are becoming to their jobs, being so tied down with a girlfriend that they may as well be married already and being desperate to get that coveted car loan and mortgage.

At what point in the apparent majority of people’s lives do their brains switch into this mode?

I’ve actually noticed that I’m gaining quite a few friends that are younger (and therefore still fun, living life to the max kinda people) than me, something I’m probably subconsciously achieving to counteract the boring lifestyle which the majority of my older friends have began to embrace. I can’t continue to do this all my life though. God knows I don’t want to be a 35 year old, party-loving man whose social circle consists primarily of 19 year olds.

Am I alone? Does anyone else feel my pain?

Lockstep

Pauleeeeeeee wrote: »

At the ripe old age of (nearly) 22 it’s beginning to depress me somewhat to see how much of a slave friends are becoming to their jobs, being so tied down with a girlfriend that they may as well be married already and being desperate to get that coveted car loan and mortgage.

At what point in the apparent majority of people’s lives do their brains switch into this mode?

I’ve actually noticed that I’m gaining quite a few friends that are younger (and therefore still fun, living life to the max kinda people) than me, something I’m probably subconsciously achieving to counteract the boring lifestyle which the majority of my older friends have began to embrace. I can’t continue to do this all my life though. God knows I don’t want to be a 35 year old, party-loving man whose social circle consists primarily of 19 year olds.

Am I alone? Does anyone else feel my pain?

I agree.

I would elaborate but I'm heading off in two minutes

daveirl

This post has been deleted.

Pauleeeeeeee

daveirl wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

Well I don't know anyone with a mortgage at 22 but I have two friends, 24 and 25 years old, who do. I think 24 seems to be the magic number with the 'transition' into boring.

the_syco

Heh. When young, we aspire to get a girl. Once we get a girl, we spend time with them, go on double and treble dates with other friends who are now couples, and life is no longer "goto nightclub to get laid", but "chill at home with the young one", and thus, to the single people (like me) they may seem "boring", when in fact they have achieved what I, like so many others, see as a goal.

Odd, huh? When we get what we want, we become what we despised so many years ago.

Though, some keep living, enjoying life, but these people are called "hippies", as they don't fit the "normal" category that old folk are meant to fit. You must be boring, trying to escape, but if you're not boring, you're looked upon as weird.

Chong

I feel your pain, I have couple mates about 23 who do nothing but talk about houses and mortgages does my head in . I am 23 ffs I dont want a mortgage.

watna

I'm a lot happier being a boring sod then I ever was when young single and partying more. Maybe your friends are the same too?

shane86

I dropped out of college and worked a proper job since 19. Thing is my college was sh1te tbh. Not a whole pile of craic, most of the lookers in my class were gone by November of first year. My mate got his college time paid for. 3 years of failed courses, did nothing but drink, smoke hash, take alot of yips and acid and lie around his apartment chasing birds who lived next door. I dont know how he ever actually got a bird- he was/is a chronic alcoholic and never once even bought a thing for any girl he was with, bar one dinner (mind you they were all yanks. And I dont really like yank women, theyre all weird, highly strung and complain about our drinking, Id numerous house parties to get stuck in and only did once, in most cases Id sooner go on a session with my mam than them they were so boring) They are simply not like Irish girls who want you to pay for their cinema, their taxi their this that and the other and who wont do with ya bringin them round 3 nights a week for a DVD and 2 big bottles of smirnoff ice.

For me, I lived like he did in the summers of 2004 and 2005. I was workin menial minimum wage jobs, spendin every penny on drink, parties and clubs 4 days a week. tbh Ive had **** all craic as a working man apart from when I have went on holidays abroad, which is why Im jackin it in and going to Oz. 5 grand saved and Im blowing the lot on recreating the good old days. Im seein someone now but really I am not planning on jacking in the whole drinking and pulling game until I am at least 27.

In response to what someone said above, stayin in watchin the tv with the bird isnt gettin old (though Id never put it above a session with the lads), its refusin to go out and pay a shedload of money in appalingly bad Irish nightclubs. Foreign nightclubs are the business but I am sick to my hole of blowing 100 quid in Dublin town kips playing tunes from Grease and Dirty Dancing to end the night. Admittedtly my college repeatin mate is from money, therefore he had more craic in college than the average joe but still. I want a slice of the action. My course was crap. I was bored. All the lookers who I got on with either left or never showed up, so in terms of pulling it was crap. Come to think of it of a class of 80 starting only maybe 3 sets of people got with each other.

Pighead

Damn straight Pauleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Pigheads been thru this particular transition in life. Things change, people take less risks. 10 years ago Pighead would have told you to fcuk off back from where you came from and to stop whining like an old man, now as a wiser more sensible 30 year old Pigheads advice to you is to stay safe.

The years really do change you Pauleeeeeeeeeeeee. In 10 years time you'll be asking the admins to get rid of all those eeeeeeeeeeee's at the end of your name as you think they make you look a bit childlike and innocent. Enjoy these golden years old friend.

ztoical

Pauleeeeeeee wrote: »

At the ripe old age of (nearly) 22 it’s beginning to depress me somewhat to see how much of a slave friends are becoming to their jobs

I make comics and cartoons for a living so I don't mind being a slave to my job

Neamhshuntasach

nearly all my mates are like that. with the same girl since they are 17/18 and then when they hit 23/24 they went and got their own house. As much as they do become quite a bit boring a lot of it is down to them not being able to afford going out. I always wondered if i made the wrong choice in going to college while all my mates went straight into work because they were all earning full time wages. so i assumed they'd have saved a bit. but how wrong was i. the mortgage, bills, shopping, running a car, the yearly holiday, etc has them all just about surviving.

i don't want that life yet so i'm heading off for a year to postone reality for a while

shane86

Neamhshuntasach wrote: »

. As much as they do become quite a bit boring a lot of it is down to them not being able to afford going out.

Id beg to differ. My college going mates would wreck my head with the penny pinching. **** I remember 8 of us once walked at night from the south circular thru Dolphins Barn and various other kips to a house party in Kilmainham iirc, all because the cnuts were too tight to pay for a taxi. Add to that being dragged to fcuking dives like Coppers cause they are too tight for anywhere semi decent and it really grates.

Student clubs in general suck, full of drink robbing **** and people who cant even drink full stop.

Pauleeeeeeee

the_syco wrote: »

Heh. When young, we aspire to get a girl. Once we get a girl, we spend time with them, go on double and treble dates with other friends who are now couples, and life is no longer "goto nightclub to get laid", but "chill at home with the young one", and thus, to the single people (like me) they may seem "boring", when in fact they have achieved what I, like so many others, see as a goal.

Ah see this is where you are wrong. It isn't about having a girlfriend. Granted I may be single right now but I've done the girlfriend thing a few times now and this hasn't changed my mindset.
Not to offend anyone on this matter either, but it seems to me that the ones who do become "boring" (and I'm very close not to putting the ol' bunny ears around that word) are the ones who might have found it particularly hard to find themselves a girlfriend throughout their lives and when they finally do get one they cling onto them for dear life, cutting off everything else that they found fun up until this point. That's what it looks like to me with the majority of cases anyway.

Pighead wrote:

The years really do change you Pauleeeeeeeeeeeee. In 10 years time you'll be asking the admins to get rid of all those eeeeeeeeeeee's at the end of your name as you think they make you look a bit childlike and innocent. Enjoy these golden years old friend.

Pighead, lovely to hear from you. Although changing my boards user name in ten years time so as to embrace a coming of age and display an air of maturity may be an inevitability, I don't think I could manage loosing all my lovely e's. Perhaps "Mr. Pauleeeeeeeeeeeee" would work. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Hopefully we won't though.

ztoical wrote:

I make comics and cartoons for a living so I don't mind being a slave to my job

ztoical, I'd like to point out that for the majority of last year I actually worked as a 3D artist. My "dream job". Yes, the days did fly by MOST of the time but literally (and I mean literally) sleeping under your desk some nights because you love your job is not a good thing. Plus everyone I worked with were complete, utter nerds. No-sir-ee, I refuse ever to be a "slave" to my job ever again, unless of course it is a Mötley Crüe-esqe type of job that I have.

Terry

Welcome to adulthood.

I had a great run. I've been drunk since I was about 14, but it's really boring now.
At 32, all I want to do now is settle down, have a family and watch the kids grow up.

You're only 21, so I wouldn't really worry about it if I was you. Watch those friends who have settled down. Most likely they will split with their significant other and come back to you looking for a good night out. Then they will go too far and end up completely messed up. I've seen it too many times.

Enjoy your 20's and live life to the full.
The average life span is no longer 40. You have plenty of time to settle down.

stovelid

They're really all single and jobless; they're just lying because they don't like you.

WhiteWashMan

Pauleeeeeeee wrote: »

At the ripe old age of (nearly) 22 it’s beginning to depress me somewhat to see how much of a slave friends are becoming to their jobs, being so tied down with a girlfriend that they may as well be married already and being desperate to get that coveted car loan and mortgage.

At what point in the apparent majority of people’s lives do their brains switch into this mode?

I’ve actually noticed that I’m gaining quite a few friends that are younger (and therefore still fun, living life to the max kinda people) than me, something I’m probably subconsciously achieving to counteract the boring lifestyle which the majority of my older friends have began to embrace. I can’t continue to do this all my life though. God knows I don’t want to be a 35 year old, party-loving man whose social circle consists primarily of 19 year olds.

Am I alone? Does anyone else feel my pain?

I think what you mean is that your friends are off doing other things in life and are still not doing the same boring things they were at 18.

Sounds like someone is having difficulty in handling change. Your friends priorities have changed. Yours havent. Doesnt mean they are boring and dont like fun, just they perhaps they just dont want to go out and get as sihtfaced as quick as possible in the hope that cute girls will find this sexually arousing and take them home with them.

Maybe your old friends now think youre boring for still doing the same old thing and not growing up?

Mr.Nice Guy

I can relate to the OP only I'm the boring sod.

WhiteWashMan

Pauleeeeeeee wrote: »

Ah see this is where you are wrong. .

Its also very dull to talk to people who feel they know everything.

WindSock

Being unemployed, broke, sitting around all day smoking dope and watching films is quite boring too, after a while.

Terry

WhiteWashMan wrote: »

I think what you mean is that your friends are off doing other things in life and are still not doing the same boring things they were at 18.

Sounds like someone is having difficulty in handling change. Your friends priorities have changed. Yours havent. Doesnt mean they are boring and dont like fun, just they perhaps they just dont want to go out and get as sihtfaced as quick as possible in the hope that cute girls will find this sexually arousing and take them home with them.

Maybe your old friends now think youre boring for still doing the same old thing and not growing up?

Dude has a point there.

I was lucky enough to have friends who were a bunch of degenerates until their late 20's.
Out of my core group of friends, I'm the only one who still hasn't settled down. The others are now married/co-habiting (read: living in sin) and all have kids (read: bastard chldren, bar one who was married two years ago and will not be a father for a few months).

Ok, degenerates may be a bit harsh. They all have trades, earn a good wage and actually go to work on a Monday.
The thing is, these days I need to book a night out with them.
Bank holidays are a given, but your average Saturday night has to be organised a week or two in advance so that they can get a babysitter and stuff.

Like I said, enjoy your 20's.

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

WindSock wrote: »

Being unemployed, broke, sitting around all day smoking dope and watching films is quite boring too, after a while.

I say thee, nay

JC 2K3

It varies from person to person tbh.

I'm 18 and have friends who are the same age and older than me. My older friends(20-24) are generally much crazier and more fun to go out with, and many of my friends who are my age are boring.

The ones who are in relationships are the most boring. I think this is a universal trait.

Terry

Mordeth wrote: »

I say thee, nay

I'd have to agree with her, Mordeth.

I haven't worked since just after christmas (you really don't want to know what's wrong with me now) and I'm ****ing bored silly.

I'd smoke weed, but it's crap.

Ah well, I have to see a probation officer tomorrow. At least that's something to do.
I've no idea what this entails because I've never had to do it before. I'm fairly sure I just have to tell them I haven't broken any laws since my last appearance in court, which I haven't. I'm a good boy now.

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

I'd smoke weed, but it's crap.

blasphemer!

Peared

Good boys dont call defenceless kids with non married parents bastards. Not nice Terry. I await the smart answer denouncing me for being too pc etc which I aint btw, I just dont think its nice.

Terry

Mordeth wrote: »

blasphemer!

Honestly, the only drug worth doing is beer. It kicks ass.
Yes, I'm slightly buzzing now and am about to head over ot the local and get some more beer.

Peared wrote: »

Good boys dont call defenceless kids with non married parents bastards. Not nice Terry. I await the smart answer denouncing me for being too pc etc which I aint btw, I just dont think its nice.

Do you really think I would refer to the children of my friends as "bastard children" in a serious manner? Any child for that matter.

Look back a the post and see the living in sin reference.
I was joking.

Peared

Fair nuff. Pologies. Kevin Myers u aint.

AngryHippie

WhiteWashMan wrote: »

Its also very dull to talk to people who feel they know everything.

yawn


IMHO, everyone changes, the coupling/kids thing is the big one, cos of the commitment and responsibility. I know how headwrecking it is. I'm 25, single, just left the college thing behind and went doing a job I actually enjoy for fairly **** money. Most of my mates are flat out trying to make a career from their degree so that they can settle down with their acceptable bird buy a gaff in a ****in suburb and commute to hell every day while trying to have a couple of whining cabbages of kids to eternally dissappoint them.
Its not on my do list right now. I'm not a crazy hormonal bird. I don't need to have kids right away, but that whats tickin their clocks, and once you get shacked up with a broody biyatch, its only a matter of time. Don't get me wrong, its totally natural, and it seems to be human's only purpose on this rock, But its a fact. Live it large while you can or you'll regret it later.
To the ladies : I mean no offence, Many of you are not baby crazy, but if your 25 or over and completely honest with yourself can you look at a baby and go Thank **** its not mine ???? cos thats what men are sayin.

Fanny Cradock

Your only 22 and you've noticed this already? Mercy me! Unfortunately it gets worse, much worse from here in. Now at the ripe old age of 29, every moment I live is agony!

Peared

Do you actually know any girls angryhippie or have you just seen them on the telly?

Lots of women dont want babies. Especially not other peoples.

AngryHippie

Yeah, one or two. They're mental.
But I'm sure theres some normal ones out there.

I knew there would be a backlash for that post, But you can't seriously tell me thats not the reason for the OP's problem.

RonMexico

I'm 25 and I know exactly what your talking about. My friends are all settling down and have become boring as ****. One of them was a raging lunatic and now he won't even go to a club because his bird won't allow him. Only one of my friends is in the same boat as me. One year left to get my Masters and then I'm finished with the whole college thing after 8 years (I changed courses). Have absolutely no plans to settle down, the thought of living in this ****hole for the rest of my life is enough to kill me. Going out here is a load of ****e, 100euro for a few drinks in a club full of ****. No thanks, once I graduate I'm leaving this dump of a country for good. Life here is **** and once you have lived abroad you will know what I'm talking about.

Dudess

Fanny Cradock wrote: »

Your only 22 and you've noticed this already?

Yeah, you're hanging around with the wrong people! That's bizarre. It really does depend on your circle of friends - I've certainly never encountered ones like yours at that age.
My circle of friends are all in their late 20s and we've never had so much fun as we're having now. You've long enough to be settled down. My older brothers and their mates were the same - actually ARE the same! They're only starting to look into the whole mortgage thing now. And nearly everyone is paired up but we still want our social lives. Ok, we rarely go out during the week (because we have work in the morning) but we never stay in at the weekend.

Peared

K so I'll accept that some women want to have babies and get married. BUT they cant force this on the fella. If he really doesnt want it then break up with her. Blaming settling down at an early age on women is just silly, it takes two. Will a man really take on a 400 grand mortgage to keep a girl happy? A wee part of him must want that too.

jdivision

I'm 29 and have to say this Christmas was first where my mate's WAGs were more important than mates. Was a bit annoyed about it, but then maybe that's because I'm single.
I have a mortgage but I still usually go out three or four times a week. The joys of singledom. Having spent more than 10 years in a pub though I've definitely started to get sick of it. This is my third year giving up drink for January; to be honest if I didn't work in a job where you get loads of free drink if you want it I doubt if I'd go out half as much.

AngryHippie

Peared wrote: »

K so I'll accept that some women want to have babies and get married. BUT they cant force this on the fella. If he really doesnt want it then break up with her. Blaming settling down at an early age on women is just silly, it takes two. Will a man really take on a 400 grand mortgage to keep a girl happy? A wee part of him must want that too.

of course. Many of my mates are chumps when it comes to women. They go all mushy and make pillow promises that turn round to bite them in the hole, And some of them do love hardship, but some of them were manipulated because they are not as sneaky as their birds. Now they are living in a nightmare. Ha Ha:p

stovelid

AngryHippie wrote: »

of course. Many of my mates are chumps when it comes to women. They go all mushy and make pillow promises that turn round to bite them in the hole, And some of them do love hardship, but some of them were manipulated because they are not as sneaky as their birds. Now they are living in a nightmare. Ha Ha:p

Not getting your hole certainly makes you bitter doesn't it?

constitutionus

Pauleeeeeeee wrote: »

At the ripe old age of (nearly) 22 it’s beginning to depress me somewhat to see how much of a slave friends are becoming to their jobs, being so tied down with a girlfriend that they may as well be married already and being desperate to get that coveted car loan and mortgage.

At what point in the apparent majority of people’s lives do their brains switch into this mode?

I’ve actually noticed that I’m gaining quite a few friends that are younger (and therefore still fun, living life to the max kinda people) than me, something I’m probably subconsciously achieving to counteract the boring lifestyle which the majority of my older friends have began to embrace. I can’t continue to do this all my life though. God knows I don’t want to be a 35 year old, party-loving man whose social circle consists primarily of 19 year olds.

Am I alone? Does anyone else feel my pain?

look at the brightside. when your thirty you wont havne any friends. they'll all be parents and you'll be lucky to seem em twice a year.

thats life. get used to it

and hey, as a 34yr old partyloving man those 19ry olds can be just what you need. well the girls any way

Dudess

stovelid wrote: »

Not getting your hole certainly makes you bitter doesn't it?

Such a beautiful turn of phrase, stovelid!

Peared

Tbh if you can be "manipulated" into marriage, kids, a mortgage and never going out then you get what you deserve. Or what you wanted but were too scared to tell your blokey mates so you claim you were pushed into it.

AngryHippie

stovelid wrote: »

Not getting your hole certainly makes you bitter doesn't it?

Nah not really. I get it when I go lookin for it, usually. Just not arsed spendin all my time chasin it only to have to turn around and keep her happy. but whatever does it for ya:rolleyes:

AngryHippie

Peared wrote: »

Tbh if you can be "manipulated" into marriage, kids, a mortgage and never going out then you get what you deserve. Or what you wanted but were too scared to tell your blokey mates so you claim you were pushed into it.

I'm not that blokey to be honest. I do plan to have a couple of kids eventually, But I'm not going to spend my 20's gettin sucked into a spiral of bull****. I'll have them when I'm good an ready. Not because some chick I've grown to like is in a bloody hurry.

constitutionus

Peared wrote: »

Tbh if you can be "manipulated" into marriage, kids, a mortgage and never going out then you get what you deserve. Or what you wanted but were too scared to tell your blokey mates so you claim you were pushed into it.

ive seen this. begins with systematic isolation of the bloke untill the wifes all he see's/ is allowed out with. then comes on the preasure about "where we're going" next thing you know your married with kids

usually ends in divorce and bloke losing everything.

Peared

Angryhippie Id love to see you in 10 years time with some hard ass career woman who doesnt want kids and you getting all gooey eyed when you see them and snivvling over ads on the telly. "But they're soo cute..."

WhiteWashMan

AngryHippie wrote: »

of course. Many of my mates are chumps when it comes to women. They go all mushy and make pillow promises that turn round to bite them in the hole, And some of them do love hardship, but some of them were manipulated because they are not as sneaky as their birds. Now they are living in a nightmare. Ha Ha:p

thats right, becuase its all the fault of those pesky wommin and their manipulating ways.

Peared

constitutionus wrote: »

ive seen this. begins with systematic isolation of the bloke untill the wifes all he see's/ is allowed out with. then comes on the preasure about "where we're going" next thing you know your married with kids

usually ends in divorce and bloke losing everything.

Jaysus. Id say you're a big ball of fun :eek:

AngryHippie

Peared wrote: »

Angryhippie Id love to see you in 10 years time with some hard ass career woman who doesnt want kids and you getting all gooey eyed when you see them and snivvling over ads on the telly. "But they're soo cute..."

You could be right. dear god what have I been doing. All those parties, the drugs, the late nights, Why haven't I been changing nappies and late night feeding and working like a bastard to pay for a mortgage to put a roof over their heads and feed them. I have been such a fool. Just thinking of myself

OR

I could keep her lit as I am until I find a lass on the same page, at that stage, I'll have the gaff sorted bar some decoration, A decent wage without havin to work like a dog, and a head full of lost memories and unknown regrets. I know its a crazy theory but I'll PM ya in 7 or 8 years time and let ya know. If you're right I'll put the kids on e-bay

Terry

Peared wrote: »

Tbh if you can be "manipulated" into marriage, kids, a mortgage and never going out then you get what you deserve. Or what you wanted but were too scared to tell your blokey mates so you claim you were pushed into it.

When life gives you lemons, eat some sugar.
It will remove some of the bitterness.

I'd kill for a wife and kids.
Single life gets really dull when you hit your 30's.

Dudess

Meh, it's down to the individual - I have no interest in settling down until I'm in the second half of my 30s. The likelihood is I'll live until I'm at least 80 - Christ that's long enough to be settled down.

bronte

Aww Terry! (I love your reason for editing)
Op..maybe going out and making a few new mates might shake it up a bit.

WhiteWashMan

AngryHippie wrote: »

You could be right. dear god what have I been doing. All those parties, the drugs, the late nights, Why haven't I been changing nappies and late night feeding and working like a bastard to pay for a mortgage to put a roof over their heads and feed them. I have been such a fool. Just thinking of myself

OR

I could keep her lit as I am until I find a lass on the same page, at that stage, I'll have the gaff sorted bar some decoration, A decent wage without havin to work like a dog, and a head full of lost memories and unknown regrets. I know its a crazy theory but I'll PM ya in 7 or 8 years time and let ya know. If you're right I'll put the kids on e-bay

why do you think that if youre not out being single partying all night, doing drugs and getting pissed off your head, then you must obviously be a slave to your job, unhappily married (after being manipulated into it by a mischievous and devilish woman, obviously) and spend all your time changing nappies?

Life is about what you want.

This is why its boring talking to people who think they know everything.
They dont.