In your 20s? Everyone you know becoming boring sods?

Terry

WhiteWashMan wrote: »

why do you think that if youre not out being single partying all night, doing drugs and getting pissed off your head, then you must obviously be a slave to your job, unhappily married (after being manipulated into it by a mischievous and devilish woman, obviously) and spend all your time changing nappies?

Life is about what you want.

This is why its boring talking to people who think they know everything.
They dont.

Find me a person who can go out partying all the time without having a job that pays at least €15 an hour (or having another form of financial support) and I'll blow them.

I think AngryHippie may be talking a bit of crap.

WhiteWashMan

Terry wrote: »

I think AngryHippie may be talking a bit of crap.

Now, I didnt say that

Jesus Wept

Terry wrote: »

When life gives you lemons, eat some sugar.
It will remove some of the bitterness.

I'd kill for a wife and kids.
Single life gets really dull when you hit your 30's.

Is it time the community of boards found you a fine fertile wife?
I think so.

WhiteWashMan

dudess wears the pants now

Jrad

stovelid wrote: »

Not getting your hole certainly makes you bitter doesn't it?

I love this phrase, what does it actally mean though? I think i know but if its what i think i am very surprised its so commonly used

Jesus Wept

Ok, let's reprioritise,

1. The community of boards need to find pictures of dudess in her pants.
2. The community of boards need to find a fine, fertile wife for Terry.

Terry

WhiteWashMan wrote: »

Now, I didnt say that

Never said you did.
Just giving my opinion.

Requiem4adream

I find my group of friends are the exact opposite, bunch of no-major-commitments/no-responsiblity losers like myself in their mid-20s going out 4 nights a week still acting like we're 17!!! (im 25 now). Although 1 of them got a mortgage recently so i should probably be making plans to excommunicate him from our merry little band

Requiem4adream

Requiem4adream wrote: »

Although 1 of them got a mortgage recently so i should probably be making plans to excommunicate him from our merry little band

Poor naive dreamy, you forget that as a nation we are first and foremost sheeplike in our thinking.
It starts out with one lunatic and then 6 months later they have all bitten the bullet in an attempt to keep up.

The solution is to socialise incognito with young wans.

pid()

Pauleeeeeeee wrote: »

At the ripe old age of (nearly) 22 it’s beginning to depress me somewhat to see how much of a slave friends are becoming to their jobs, being so tied down with a girlfriend that they may as well be married already and being desperate to get that coveted car loan and mortgage.

At what point in the apparent majority of people’s lives do their brains switch into this mode?

I’ve actually noticed that I’m gaining quite a few friends that are younger (and therefore still fun, living life to the max kinda people) than me, something I’m probably subconsciously achieving to counteract the boring lifestyle which the majority of my older friends have began to embrace. I can’t continue to do this all my life though. God knows I don’t want to be a 35 year old, party-loving man whose social circle consists primarily of 19 year olds.

Am I alone? Does anyone else feel my pain?

Interesting thread.

I'm in a similar boat to you...kinda. Well actually I'm in a similar boat to your mates. I do not have a mortgage and don't plan on getting one for a while. I'm 24, was engaged but am now happily single. I used to love going out every weekend but I'm bored of that now. I haven't been in the pub since Stephen's night, and I left extremely early to get a good night sleep that night - even though I didn't have work the following day.

It's 5:30am and I'm currently working from home. I moved to Galway at the end of September and I'd say I have been out socialising.... four times? Two of which were work nights out. All I seem to do these days is work and sleep. I'm making an unreal wage for someone my age. In March I will be on double what all of my college mates are on.

I do wish I could do more in Galway though. I love this place, always have. It's just after working really hard for 8-10 hours each day I'm wrecked by the time I get home from work, shower, make the dinner and eat it. I usually have an hour or two to myself and then it's sleepy time. At the weekends I'll either go home to see my family and friends, or stay in Galway and chillax... watch a few DVDs, order some food, have a few cans, read a book.

That's pretty much what I do at the moment. When I think back on how much money I spent over the years getting blind drunk it's pretty depressing. I'm currently saving so I can travel the world... and not to travel the world to end up in an Irish bar doing exactly what I did here in my teens. I would actually like to see other countries for what they are. Go camping in the outback, go on safari in Africa... find myself a nice hobbit woman in New Zealand. Instead of making some publican extremely rich off my hard earned.

One of the reasons I'm single now is my ex had no ambitions to do these things. She was happy out never leaving Ireland again for the rest of her life. That depressed me to the core. I think it's very dangerous to be so involved with someone when you're 24.

One of my mates took out an 11 grand loan for a car a couple of months ago, and he now has 3 jobs trying to make repayments. Another one of my mates used his entire SSIA and his life's savings on a mortgage. Both were 24 in the last couple of months. Ridiculous.

Over the next year or two you might start to settle a small bit. I think the thing that kicked it all off for me was I was in my local night club at home and I realised I was the oldest person in there. I walked out and haven't been back since. I will die happy if I am never in another night club for the rest of my life. What's the point? You can't hear what anyone is saying. I don't like dancing unless it's music I really enjoy - and that's never played in any nightclub. I don't like chasing women in a nightclub... it's pretty degrading. And I certainly do not want to go home with anyone from a nightclub. That really is not my thing at all.

If I were you, I would be asking myself where I wanted to be in 2 years. Do you want to be exactly where you are now, same amount of cash in your bank account, but with a bigger beer gut and maybe one or two extra STDs? If you're happy the way things are then good for you, don't change yet! But you will eventually - you've admitted that yourself.

FunkZ

Pauleeeeeeeeeee, you need to sit down and make a list of goals that you want to achieve in the next five years.

Wait...

After reading the entire first page of answers I can't remember what your question was, so enjoy life man!

bill_ashmount

You think it's bad now, wait until you hit your early thirties.
I won't even tell ye what it's like, it might push everyone here over the edge.

Lux23

I don't know. Its a mistake to think that just because people have got a mortgage and a long term partner that they have suddenly get boring. The truth is that alot of them are paying way over the top for boxes in commuterland and have no other choice but to be boring!! I have a big group of friends ranging from about 23 to 40 (im25) who are basically like me. Single, sharing in town and spending most of their wages on clothes and entertainment. So we are all quite commited to finding a party at four on a sunday morning, they keep me bold enough.

I have a few
friends who have bought horrible houses in holes in louth and Meatn but they still get up to all sorts occasionally they just don't have as much money to do it as I do.

Im a bit immature, so I don't see myself settling down any time soon but alot of people seem to think it would do me no harm. I am constantly finding friends trying to set me up with nice, respectable mortgage types but I can't see the attraction. I would rather have a good lifestyle than own my home.

stovelid

Dudess wrote: »

Such a beautiful turn of phrase, stovelid!

I don't know what came over me.

Jrad wrote: »

I love this phrase, what does it actally mean though? I think i know but if its what i think i am very surprised its so commonly used

I think it means what you think it means.

constitutionus wrote: »

ive seen this. begins with systematic isolation of the bloke untill the wifes all he see's/ is allowed out with. then comes on the preasure about "where we're going" next thing you know your married with kids usually ends in divorce and bloke losing everything.

I know this is meant as a joke, but on the rare occasion I've experienced this, the bloke is usually just as culpable.

I'm in my mid thirties, married and mortgaged; I did it because I wanted to. Nobody put a gun to my head. I still go out most weekends and meet my/our friends, sometimes as a couple, sometimes not.

I don't cane it much during the week anymore - again, not because I'm being forced to, but because I don't want to.

There is one thing I agree with here though: your 20's do seem a bit young for marriage and a mortgage. If people want to do it though, more power to them. Friends don't solely exist for your convenience, and may want different things to you.

You Suck!

I would rather have a good lifestyle than own my home.

Hear, hear.

That people want mortgages now?, when prices are on the way down and rates potentially rising as oil drives up inflation and the us economy threatens stagnation/slower growth to the world economy.

Just what is it about the now? What is it that things have to be done sequentially? ie. job...bird.....marriage.....mortgage......kids.....????.....PROFIT!!!

Alot of this is driven by insecurity, and the need to feel an equivalence with our peers, but unfortunately it's not always for the right reasons. If your happily married, have kids, and are pleased with your life, count your blessings for a lot of people will follow the same path and not come to such a pleasant conclusion.

Why so many affairs in Ireland(with a corresponding rise in separations/ divorces)? Why so many 40 somethings driving around in mercs and beemers with a permanent frown on their face? Why a rising suicide rate?

Blame it on the weather?!?

I only know this, incentive drives everything, and until I am lucky enough to meet a bird on the same page as me, I won't have much incentive to settle and engender the responsibility's that come with that (don't take that as saying I avoid my responsibility's, I just choose them carefully) .....until then Im not going to worry much about what others are at, did that before and it was a pain in the arse.

Crazy Christ

I don't have to worry about growing old and boring: I have AIDs and my body is shutting down as I speak.

For everyone else, time brings wisdom, like a fine cigar, I like to savour each and every moment and treat people with the same respect that somebody noble like Sidney Poitier or Gregory Peck deserves. Give me some of that old time jazz

mental07

Pauleeeeeeee wrote: »

Well I don't know anyone with a mortgage at 22 but I have two friends, 24 and 25 years old, who do. I think 24 seems to be the magic number with the 'transition' into boring.

Yes! My 24-year-old friend told me the other day she's going to buy a house this year!

Schlemm

What the OP is going through could probably be described as a quarter life crisis. Jamie Cullum has a song about it ('Twentysomething') that sums it up pretty well. Everyone goes through a wierd patch when they're in their 20's. I've certainly seen it in some of my friends - maybe their leaving cert or college didn't work out for them and they aren't living the life they imagined they would now, and I can see that they're a bit freaked out by this. I'm halfway through college doing a fairly long course that leads to a particular job, so I guess I have a pretty good idea of what I'll be earning and what I'll be working at.

A good few of my other friends (we're all early 20's) are finishing college, have no idea what they want to do (despite the goals they had a few years back), and I could imagine that this is something pretty scary compared to the relative sense of security that I have. They seem to spend their lives going out to clubs getting pissed, and I find this really boring. In college if we go out we spend more time going to pubs or people's houses and I would prefer this to a club any day - no rubbish music, dancefloors, meatmarket, waste of money. A lot of them want to go travelling to Australia, and I would love to take some time after college to travel or do something different before starting work, but I'd hate to wind up in a boring job in a place where there's loads of other Irish people; I'd rather do something that I have an urge to do and won't get a chance to do again.

At this stage of my life, what I realise is that I've more freedom now than I will ever have. I've gained the independence of my 20's, having lost the restricrtions of school and being a teenager, and having not yet gained the burden of a morgage, kids, house, bills, etc. I can do pretty much anything I want, and have very few responsibilities to worry about. And I really want to make the most of that - I certainly don't want to spend it in a nightclub, pissing away my money on drink. I would love to travel or even live abroad (Dublin is a sh!tehole tbh) and see the world and have a good time. And I guess that's easy for me to say because my career path is clear cut, and I can work pretty much anywhere I want - I'd say it would be pretty scary for me otherwise. I guess some people make choices at this time of their lives that restrict them too, choices that are made because of all the independence that they have, and choices that result in restricting this independence. Some people get tied down to paying back college loans, or mess up in college because they've to pay for loans, and wind up being stuck in a rubbish job to pay for things, and I think especially with loans and debt, the cycle is very hard to break. Others wind up going off on huge tangents in their lives that they miss out on other opportunities, like doing something else in college that they would enjoy, rather than just getting a quick fix out of spending time getting drunk. It's a scary time at this age, but it's also one of the best parts of your life, and I'd hate to waste it.

Hot Dog

Good post schlemm, wuater life crisis are a difficult, but thats life.

Im going to kazakstan, look for gold. Find myself, or the worlds largest apple.

SimpleSam06

Pauleeeeeeee wrote: »

Am I alone? Does anyone else feel my pain?

I deal with it by trying to conquer the world and rule the destiny of every living thing in it. It helps while away the afternoons.

walrusgumble

always look on the bright side of life
do do, do do di do di do.........

WhiteWashMan

You Suck! wrote: »

Hear, hear.

That people want mortgages now?, when prices are on the way down and rates potentially rising as oil drives up inflation and the us economy threatens stagnation/slower growth to the world economy.

Just what is it about the now? What is it that things have to be done sequentially? ie. job...bird.....marriage.....mortgage......kids.....????.....PROFIT!!!

Alot of this is driven by insecurity, and the need to feel an equivalence with our peers, but unfortunately it's not always for the right reasons. If your happily married, have kids, and are pleased with your life, count your blessings for a lot of people will follow the same path and not come to such a pleasant conclusion.

Why so many affairs in Ireland(with a corresponding rise in separations/ divorces)? Why so many 40 somethings driving around in mercs and beemers with a permanent frown on their face? Why a rising suicide rate?

Blame it on the weather?!?

I only know this, incentive drives everything, and until I am lucky enough to meet a bird on the same page as me, I won't have much incentive to settle and engender the responsibility's that come with that (don't take that as saying I avoid my responsibility's, I just choose them carefully) .....until then Im not going to worry much about what others are at, did that before and it was a pain in the arse.

What a load of bollocks.


God, the youth of today are getting stupider and stupider

You Suck!

lol, Feel free to actually point out what is bollocks, or will it just be more non-direct personal abuse(implying that yours truely is stupid). :rolleyes:

Fine example your setting for "the youth of today"

WhiteWashMan

I'm not a moral compass, nor am I your nanny.

and I thought quoting all of your post indicated that it was all bollocks.

If you want more examples, see your reasons why people you think people are boring.

You Suck!

I'm not a moral compass, nor am I your nanny.

You just like taking on the tone of such. Nice-uh.

If you want more examples, see your reasons why people you think people are boring.

And if you were paying attention, you would not that I have given no such reasons in this thread, nor have I accused anyone of being boring.

God, the old of today are getting senile. :rolleyes:

WhiteWashMan

Youre absolutely right. I mixed up your bollocks with the bollocks of the OP.
My apologies.

zipy

People take themselves so seriously these days. We have become slaves to a society that demands we must have that house that big car the beautiful family. We judge one another on our success, you are nothing if you don't buy into the semi in the suburbs. Yes we are all just trying to get by, live our lives the best way possible the only way most of us now know. We are a shallow society as a result. This country is an economy not a community. Bring back flower power and free love.

RonMexico

pid() wrote: »

Interesting thread.

I'm in a similar boat to you...kinda. Well actually I'm in a similar boat to your mates. I do not have a mortgage and don't plan on getting one for a while. I'm 24, was engaged but am now happily single. I used to love going out every weekend but I'm bored of that now. I haven't been in the pub since Stephen's night, and I left extremely early to get a good night sleep that night - even though I didn't have work the following day.

It's 5:30am and I'm currently working from home. I moved to Galway at the end of September and I'd say I have been out socialising.... four times? Two of which were work nights out. All I seem to do these days is work and sleep. I'm making an unreal wage for someone my age. In March I will be on double what all of my college mates are on.

I do wish I could do more in Galway though. I love this place, always have. It's just after working really hard for 8-10 hours each day I'm wrecked by the time I get home from work, shower, make the dinner and eat it. I usually have an hour or two to myself and then it's sleepy time. At the weekends I'll either go home to see my family and friends, or stay in Galway and chillax... watch a few DVDs, order some food, have a few cans, read a book.

That's pretty much what I do at the moment. When I think back on how much money I spent over the years getting blind drunk it's pretty depressing. I'm currently saving so I can travel the world... and not to travel the world to end up in an Irish bar doing exactly what I did here in my teens. I would actually like to see other countries for what they are. Go camping in the outback, go on safari in Africa... find myself a nice hobbit woman in New Zealand. Instead of making some publican extremely rich off my hard earned.

One of the reasons I'm single now is my ex had no ambitions to do these things. She was happy out never leaving Ireland again for the rest of her life. That depressed me to the core. I think it's very dangerous to be so involved with someone when you're 24.

One of my mates took out an 11 grand loan for a car a couple of months ago, and he now has 3 jobs trying to make repayments. Another one of my mates used his entire SSIA and his life's savings on a mortgage. Both were 24 in the last couple of months. Ridiculous.

Over the next year or two you might start to settle a small bit. I think the thing that kicked it all off for me was I was in my local night club at home and I realised I was the oldest person in there. I walked out and haven't been back since. I will die happy if I am never in another night club for the rest of my life. What's the point? You can't hear what anyone is saying. I don't like dancing unless it's music I really enjoy - and that's never played in any nightclub. I don't like chasing women in a nightclub... it's pretty degrading. And I certainly do not want to go home with anyone from a nightclub. That really is not my thing at all.

If I were you, I would be asking myself where I wanted to be in 2 years. Do you want to be exactly where you are now, same amount of cash in your bank account, but with a bigger beer gut and maybe one or two extra STDs? If you're happy the way things are then good for you, don't change yet! But you will eventually - you've admitted that yourself.

My thoughts exactly. I'm 25.

Stephen

I don't think flower power and free love ever got to Ireland, given that the priests were running the place back then.

zipy

Don't you think history has proved that the priests were indeed into free love

ScumLord

OP I think your friends are just dryballs. I'm 27 and every so often I feel like maybe I should buy a house or maybe save some money but then I've no kids what the **** would I want to own a house for especially considering there not worth the money.

I am getting sick of the pub scene in Ireland and have begun traveling more and most my traveling is done alone as there's no point in relying on your stuck in a rut friends to come with you. With all the best intentions in the world they'll say they'll go but never actually do so there's no point waiting around for them.

I have no problems with people settling down if that's what they want to do and it shouldn't mean you can't be friends anymore. If anything it gives ye loads to talk about seeing as ye now live such different life's.

rainbow kirby

Hell, I'll be nearly 25 by the time I finish college. I'm in no rush to settle down at all.

iguana

Dudess wrote: »

Meh, it's down to the individual - I have no interest in settling down until I'm in the second half of my 30s. The likelihood is I'll live until I'm at least 80 - Christ that's long enough to be settled down.

My grandmother is 76 and last year she went on a meditteranian cruise, a carribean cruise, seperate holodays to Rome, London and Graceland. She also rang in the new year in Spain and takes multiple trips around Ireland. She goes dancing several times a week, she goes on shopping trips and she still runs. She has 5 children, 7 granchildren and one great-granchild.

The point is there isn't really any such thing as settling down. There is no one un-magical day where you decide to stop having fun and settle down to a life of drudgery and responsibility. It's just the case that as we grow older we get bored of the things that we found fun a year ago and move on to something new.

I've found as I grow older that I get far more satisfaction from walking my dogs than I ever did from staying out all night drinking and dancing. It doesn't mean that I don't still go out drinking and dancing but I wouldn't want to go back to doing it 5 times a week. I'm pretty sure that when the time comes I'll get even more satisfaction from taking my dogs and my children for a walk. And I'm quite looking forward to the day my yet to be born children grow up and leave my house and my husband retires and we can go on 8 holidays a year.

Imo, the only thing that is boring in life is to constantly keep doing the same thing.

Pauleeeeeeee

WhiteWashMan wrote: »

Its also very dull to talk to people who feel they know everything.

The ironing is delicious.

Schlemm wrote:

What the OP is going through could probably be described as a quarter life crisis. Jamie Cullum has a song about it ('Twentysomething') that sums it up pretty well.

That sentence had a nice American Psycho feel about it



I think Henry Rollins is a man that I personally think has a lot of qualities, in the way he lives his life anyway, that I'd aspire to try and have.

I await the long list of character flaws that Henry Rollins has that is bound to be posted.

Lux23

Pauleeeeeeee wrote: »

I think Henry Rollins is a man that I personally think has a lot of qualities, in the way he lives his life anyway, that I'd aspire to try and have.

I await the long list of character flaws that Henry Rollins has that is bound to be posted.

The big guy with the tattoos? He is pretty hot. I don't know anything about him though what makes you think you want live like him?

Terry

zipy wrote: »

People take themselves so seriously these days. We have become slaves to a society that demands we must have that house that big car the beautiful family. We judge one another on our success, you are nothing if you don't buy into the semi in the suburbs. Yes we are all just trying to get by, live our lives the best way possible the only way most of us now know. We are a shallow society as a result. This country is an economy not a community. Bring back flower power and free love.

Damn hippies.

I actually get a laugh out of people who have a mortgage for their house and another one for their two over-sized fancy cars. All material possesions are fleeting. Ummmmmmmmmmm

echosound

iguana wrote: »

Imo, the only thing that is boring in life is to constantly keep doing the same thing.

QFT.

People find different things interesting as they get older, I spent most of my teens and early twenties virtually living in pubs and clubs, then one day it hit me that I was bored to death by the same old routine, and in the past five years or so I've clocked up the grand total of zero club outings since then, and have been in the pub a handful of times. Just moved on and found different stuff to occupy my time. I'm sure in 5 years time I will be bored of what I'm doing now and will move on again to different pastimes.

Gizmodeon

I'm having a similar problem with my sister
I'm 23, and she's 19. We've always been really close, but over the last year she keeps saying I've gotten boring, and I've gotten old.
I know I've changed a lot in the last year as I've finished college and a lot of my friends are moving out etc, but I've also been happier with myself than I ever have been.We have been growing apart because of this, but she will eventually get to my stage and understand.

Just like you will eventually want something a little tamer than before, not exactly a white picket fence dream but just prefer to have a quiet night in with mates instead of drinking yourself silly etc. Hopefully it does hit you before 36 anyways for your own sake, otherwise your gonna be very lonely

WhiteWashMan

Pauleeeeeeee wrote: »

The ironing is delicious.

Not at all. Me disagreeing with you doesnt mean I take the opposite stance. Which is what you are assuming here. Again, you show your ignorance by thinking you know it all.

Pauleeeeeeee wrote: »

I think Henry Rollins is a man that I personally think has a lot of qualities, in the way he lives his life anyway, that I'd aspire to try and have.

I await the long list of character flaws that Henry Rollins has that is bound to be posted.

Oh, you mean the Henry Rollins that was big into a healthy lifestyle, and used to do lots of 'dont do drugs' ads on MTV during the early 90's, and then got stopped at Dublin Airport and refused entry into the country becuase he had drugs on him?

Which qualities do you feel you aspire to? The hypocracy, or the lie?

Caused a lot of hassle for my friend who was organising the Trinity Ball that year.

Although, I did see him when he supported the Chili Peppers in 92 at the SFX. Was a good gig.

AngryHippie

Terry wrote: »

Damn hippies.

????? Why

Terry

WhiteWashMan wrote: »

Not at all. Me disagreeing with you doesnt mean I take the opposite stance. Which is what you are assuming here. Again, you show your ignorance by thinking you know it all.



Oh, you mean the Henry Rollins that was big into a healthy lifestyle, and used to do lots of 'dont do drugs' ads on MTV during the early 90's, and then got stopped at Dublin Airport and refused entry into the country becuase he had drugs on him?

Which qualities do you feel you aspire to? The hypocracy, or the lie?

Caused a lot of hassle for my friend who was organising the Trinity Ball that year.

Although, I did see him when he supported the Chili Peppers in 92 at the SFX. Was a good gig.

Google didn't bring anything up.

I hope for the sake of your sanity that it wasn't weed he was caught with. Otherwise the AH pro-weed folk will go on a week long rant about legality.

unreggd

Most of my friends became dry ****es at 18!

so annoying!

Crazy Christ

There is nothing like a steaming cup of hot chocholate followed by a good book under the covers. Even beats sex. At 23 I can't be bothered with all you young whippersnappers. I take after my father; the only pussy he goes looking for is my grandfather's cat. I admire his booksmarts

WhiteWashMan

Terry wrote: »

Google didn't bring anything up.

I hope for the sake of your sanity that it wasn't weed he was caught with. Otherwise the AH pro-weed folk will go on a week long rant about legality.

Oh dear.

If it were anything harder, Im sure they would have arrested him instead of sending him on his way.
Im not sure its an internationally know occurance anyway. I only know becuase the then Ents officer of TCD was going out with my mate in DCU, and I thought it hilarious funny becuase Id seen him in concert a few years previously.

Besides, I was too busy back then drinking and smoking my head off, knowing anything and thinking that anyone who thought to buy a house or have a girlfriend was really boring and no fun...