Bank of Ireland my left testicle

Hagar

I just got my Bank of Ireland 2008 calendar.

The months are prominently named in English, with translation in Irish, Russian, Polish and Chinese.

Each page has a quotation by a famous person:
January - John Quincy Adams - American
February - Chinese proverb
March - George Washington - American
April - Oliver Wendall Holmes - American
May - Mark Twain - American
June - Charles Darwin - English
July - Henry Van Dyke - American
August - Henri Frederic Amiel - Swiss
September - Anonymous quote
October - Abraham Lincoln - American
November - Francoise de Motteville - French
December - Anonymous quote

They could not find a single quote by an Irish person to put on even one page of the calendar.

If I Tipp-Exed out the "Ireland" in Bank of Ireland would anyone notice?
Would anyone care? Nobody in Baggot St HQ seems to anyway.
Could it be a less Irish calendar if it tried? :mad:

The name of the printer is conspicuous by it's absence.

eve

They outsourced the printing to some anonymous printer somewhere in the world because it was cheaper to get a generic (global) calendar than get an Irish company to do it?

Jesus Wept

January 2009.

'Bank of Ireland my left testicle'
Hagar

mike65

It was printed in France.

Mike

DaBreno

Feb 2009 : "As a community we are living way beyond our means."

March 2009 : "The public are entitled to have an absolute guarantee of the financial probity and integrity of their elected representatives, their officials and above all of Ministers. They need to know that they are under financial obligations to nobody."

April 2009 : "I didn't rate you as a player, I don't rate you as a manager, and I don't rate you as a person. You're a ****ing wanker and you can stick your World Cup up your arse. The only reason I have any dealings with you is that somehow you are the manager of my country and you're not even Irish, you English ****! You can stick it up your bollocks! "

EamonnKeane

May 2008: "Howye Pat! You're a censor! How dare you! Gay Byrne and you are ... mh ... you're insufferable árseholes. You ársehole, you piece of shit, you piece of shit."

EamonnKeane

June 2008: "I was always brought up to believe that women shouldn't fight in public, that it was just not done. But I feel I need to defend myself against this. I could get into really catty suggestions about why this woman resents me so much. It could be that she earns less than me, that her husband fancies me, that she's jealous that I seem to have a healthy sex life, or it could just be that she needed something to fill her column. But I'm not going to get into that....I've worn a few hot bras in my day but I've never burnt one. But next to this kind of thing, I'd say I'm a raving feminist. Now let's leave it at that. And Claire, the next time you decide to pick on some dumb animal, pick on one your own IQ size." - Katy French, Ireland's Mary Wollstonecraft

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

this is why there's no peace in the middle east

Morlar

June 2008: "I was always brought up to believe that women shouldn't fight in public, that it was just not done. But I feel I need to defend myself against this. I could get into really catty suggestions about why this woman resents me so much. It could be that she earns less than me, that her husband fancies me, that she's jealous that I seem to have a healthy sex life, or it could just be that she needed something to fill her column. But I'm not going to get into that....I've worn a few hot bras in my day but I've never burnt one. But next to this kind of thing, I'd say I'm a raving feminist. Now let's leave it at that. And Claire, the next time you decide to pick on some dumb animal, pick on one your own IQ size." - Katy French, Ireland's Mary Wollstonecraft

Mordeth wrote: »

this is why there's no peace in the middle east

I think there is some truth to that - on the one side a barren place with resentment and jealousy being the order of the day and the other total spoilt bitchiness & insincerity to burn. Pallys v israelis in a nutshell.

ScumLord

It's a free calendar. don't like it throw it in the bin and cancel your account with Bank of Ireland. Really more people should be doing that. If you don't like the companies attitude don't give them your money it's the only way they'll learn.

BOI probably isn't the best bank out there at the very least there no better than the rest so you lose nothing by canceling your account and telling them why. Even if it's a bit overboard who cares they deserve a slap in the face.

BaconZombie

eve wrote: »

They outsourced the printing to some anonymous printer somewhere in the world because it was cheaper to get a generic (global) calendar than get an Irish company to do it?

They outsource the printing to a printer but not the design.
The design which is either done in-house or outsource to a advertising company still has to be signed-off by the heads in BOI,

---

Also it's not free, you pay for it like every other customer but it's prob 0.00000000000000000000000000000000001% of the amonth the Board Memebers get as Pay, bounces and expensives

Wertz

"The thief is an artist and the policeman is only a critic" -Oscar Wilde

...although perhaps that would be more suited to the calendar the Northern Bank issued.

Guy:Incognito

Hagar wrote: »

Would anyone care? .

I wouldnt and oddly enough dont care now.

There too much uproar these days unless everything is written in Irish, printed in Irish on paper made from irish virgins pubes by people that are 100% Irish traced back 5000 million years.

Hagar

Here's a couple of quotes from well know Irishmen that might have been appropriate for a BOI calendar.

I never wonder to see men wicked, but I often wonder to see them not ashamed. - Dean Jonathan Swift

Alas, I am dying beyond my means. - Oscar Wilde

It is only by not paying one's bills that one can hope to live in the memory of the commercial classes. - Oscar Wilde

The truth is rarely pure and never simple. - Oscar Wilde

Wertz

Old Oscar isn't the only Irishman worth quoting, here's a couple that would be very relevant to today's Ireland:

"Laws are like cobwebs, which may catch small flies, but let wasps and hornets break through."
Jonathan Swift

"We learn from failure, not from success."
Bram Stoker

"Nothing is politically right which is morally wrong"
Daniel O Connell

stepbar

Christ, ye have little to be worring about a bloody calender :rolleyes:

phasers

"Bank of" is a silly name

Terry

The grass is rarely greener on the other side, merely a different shade. Me.

FlutterinBantam

January 2008
"Barcode is reekin' with cheap skangers with big arses and no knickers"

Dublin Skanger

Toots

The calender has deteriorated in the last few years, it used to be nice but not so much now! PS, Hagar how old are you? It's usually only the old biddies that get the calenders! ''Ooh, can I have two hundred euros, all in fives? Can you put it in an envelope for me love? Have you any calenders? I need about six!":p

Hagar

FWIW I'm 51 but as I live in France I get nothing from the Bank even though I'm still a customer. But you're right about the old biddies, my mother-in-law, 72, God bless her, sent it over to me.

Senna

In work we got a 2008 diary from one of our suppliers, its an Irish company and has their logo on the front. In the diary was a map of the London Underground, we ripped it out and wrote on it 'we have no need for this' and posted it back to the supplier.
Gave me a nice satisfaction.

Toots

Hagar wrote: »

FWIW I'm 51 but as I live in France I get nothing from the Bank even though I'm still a customer. But you're right about the old biddies, my mother-in-law, 72, God bless her, sent it over to me.

Aww! That's sweet!! Did she ask for her money in an envelope?;)

Hagar

Senna wrote: »

In work we got a 2008 diary from one of our suppliers, its an Irish company and has their logo on the front. In the diary was a map of the London Underground, we ripped it out and wrote on it 'we have no need for this' and posted it back to the supplier.
Gave me a nice satisfaction.

Respect.

ScumLord

That Quinn fella usually has a good calendar of all the stuff he owns like hotels around the country and of course quarries. Fine big Irish stone quarries.

Fratton Fred

Senna wrote: »

In work we got a 2008 diary from one of our suppliers, its an Irish company and has their logo on the front. In the diary was a map of the London Underground, we ripped it out and wrote on it 'we have no need for this' and posted it back to the supplier.
Gave me a nice satisfaction.

it's not a map of the london underground, it a wiring diagram for a small thermo nuclear device.

Capt'n Midnight

Many of the TV ads for the major banks could be for anything. It's only the voice over and small print at the end that tell you what it's for.

and no pictures on it ?

thefinalstage

Fratton Fred wrote: »

it's not a map of the london underground, it a wiring diagram for a small thermo nuclear device.

Those idiots! They were suppose to only send those diaries to my contacts in Paki....merica!...Yeah...

Senna

Fratton Fred wrote: »

it's not a map of the london underground, it a wiring diagram for a small thermo nuclear device.

Cut the blue wire.....no the red.....blue definably.

mental07

July 2009
"July 19th - Marathon becomes Snickers....Galway liberated from Indians...aha! Ice Age ends!"
Fr. Dougal McGuire

Tusky

That wouldn't bother me in the slightest. I mean, come on. Is it really that big a deal that calender you got free from your bank doesn't have any Irish quotes on it ?

The things some people get worked up about...

Pepe LeFrits

Jesus wept.

FunkZ

You're gonna have to wire yourself up a petrol bomb.

Fighting Irish

Hagar wrote: »

I just got my Bank of Ireland 2008 calendar.

The months are prominently named in English, with translation in Irish, Russian, Polish and Chinese.

Each page has a quotation by a famous person:
January - John Quincy Adams - American
February - Chinese proverb
March - George Washington - American
April - Oliver Wendall Holmes - American
May - Mark Twain - American
June - Charles Darwin - English
July - Henry Van Dyke - American
August - Henri Frederic Amiel - Swiss
September - Anonymous quote
October - Abraham Lincoln - American
November - Francoise de Motteville - French
December - Anonymous quote

They could not find a single quote by an Irish person to put on even one page of the calendar.

If I Tipp-Exed out the "Ireland" in Bank of Ireland would anyone notice?
Would anyone care? Nobody in Baggot St HQ seems to anyway.
Could it be a less Irish calendar if it tried? :mad:

The name of the printer is conspicuous by it's absence.

and so they should be

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

What I want to know is... what's wrong with the left one?

stepbar

Tusky wrote: »

That wouldn't bother me in the slightest. I mean, come on. Is it really that big a deal that calender you got free from your bank doesn't have any Irish quotes on it ?

The things some people get worked up about...

+1 to that

EamonnKeane

Aug 2008: "I don't know what a tracker mortgage is"

or the classic

Sept 2008: "Train tracks are ching-ching, bit of cash, know what I mean?"

SimpleSam06

I don't give a shit. And I mean that in the most literal, non-idiomatic way. If I had a pile of turds in my back garden, and you were to walk up to me and say, "Excuse me, sir, if you would let me relieve you of one of these useless pieces of feces I could guarantee a resolution to the Bank of Ireland no-Irish-quotes-on-the-calendar issue," I would simply respond, "I'm sorry, but those are my shits, and I'm not giving one.

Zzippy

Hagar wrote: »

If I Tipp-Exed out the "Ireland" in Bank of Ireland would anyone notice?

Well if you remove it from your thread title you could make it Bank of My Left Testicle. Has a certain ring to it...

kodute

So this isn't a thread about how a major international banking company brutally mutilated you and kept said part of your genitalia as some sort of debt recovery tactic?
Talk about misleading thread titles! :mad:

Hagar

Zzippy wrote: »

Well if you remove it from your thread title you could make it Bank of My Left Testicle. Has a certain ring to it...

Rings printer...:D

If you can't rant about the ridiculous thing in life in AH where can you do it?

I suppose it was rash of me to aspire to the giddy heights attained by the many threads on toilet etiquette.