A few ...

randylonghorn

To teach or to educate?

According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem.

A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom.

That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.

Every night the maintenance man would remove them and the next day the girls would put them back.

Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man.

She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night.

To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.

He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it.

Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.

There are teachers.... and then there are educators!

_______________________

The gobshite

A man owned a small farm in Ireland .

The Dept. of Agriculture & Food claimed he was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to interview him.

"I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them," demanded the civil servant.

"Well", replied the farmer, "there's my farm hand who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him €250 a week plus free room and board.

The cook has been here for 18 months, and I pay her €180 per week plus free room and board.

Then there's the gobshite who works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about €40 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of whisky every Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally."

"That's the guy I want to talk to - the gobshite," says the agent.

"That would be me" replied the farmer

Eglinton

randylonghorn wrote: »

_______________________

The gobshite

A man owned a small farm in Ireland .

The Dept. of Agriculture & Food claimed he was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to interview him.

"I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them," demanded the civil servant.

"Well", replied the farmer, "there's my farm hand who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him €250 a week plus free room and board.

The cook has been here for 18 months, and I pay her €180 per week plus free room and board.

Then there's the gobshite who works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about €40 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of whisky every Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally."

"That's the guy I want to talk to - the gobshite," says the agent.

"That would be me" replied the farmer

And as well as being a good joke, it's pretty damn true too!