Separated: what do do with house?

lushballs

Long term Partner did the dirt and moved out 4 months ago, their choice. I have been paying all the bills except the mortgage on a 3 bed house. Ex changes mind but would like to sell house. I have just been picking myself off the floor emtionally to be honest. I feel i need a few more months before i make life decisions ie buy them out of house or sell.
I am going to offer to pay the whole mortgage for the next 6 months to get the healing time i feel i need.
Is this a fair offer? Are there any legal issues involved in this?
Thx

TwoShedsJackson

You need to ask your solicitor to help you with this situation, the internet's not going to hack it here - having said that a lot depends on whether you were paying the mortgage 50/50 and who's name the house is in etc.

Personally I would not offer to pay the whole mortgage just to get thinking time, this could complicate an eventual legal matter which unfortunately will have to be settled sooner or later. Assuming you paid 50/50 and both your names are on the title deeds, this process is going to take months anyway so you will have plenty of time to try and reach an agreement.

Good luck.

Victor

Did you agree before hand what would be done witht he property if you broke up? Is this in writing?

Get one of your friends and spend Saturday finding every bill and receipt you can and putting them in some sort of order. List everything that was shared - groceries, household bills, holidays, the works. A spreadsheet may be useful. Don't do it by yourself as it'll bring up memories you may not be able to handle alone (not a judgment).

When you have this, go talk to a solicitor - preferably not the one you used to buy the property.

lushballs

House in both names. 50/50 all the way with every bill that came in door up until 4 months ago. Long term relationship and we had a house before.
Did not discuss what would happen if we broke up unfortunately (life lesson).
Because i am so emotional (depression + insomnia) i am finding it really hard to sit down and explore whether i can afford to buy my ex out.

Victor

lushballs wrote: »

Because i am so emotional (depression + insomnia) i am finding it really hard to sit down and explore whether i can afford to buy my ex out.

So drag a friend in to help on the paperwork. Thats what friends are for.

Note the Rent-a-Room scheme means you can earn quite a bit tax free to help with the mortgage. http://www.revenue.ie/index.htm?/leaflets/it70.htm I'm not sure, but I suspect the €7,620 was increase in the budget.

astrofool

It's €10,000 for the rent a room scheme now.

If you can, you should try and buy him out (assuming you're settled and like the place and can afford it), if you're going to sell, sell quickly, it could take months to get the sale through. It's a hard time to do this, but you have to for your future's sake. A 6 month thinking time is probably what not to do tbh.

lushballs

Good advice: I will get a friend to help with financial budget.
The 6 months is not just for thinking time, it's mostly for healing/recovery time. My mental/emotional health is more important to me right now than my financial situation. Another snag is that we have 2 1/2 years left on a fixed rate mortgage so will have to pay a penalty for breaking it.
I will be getting legal advice also. I am doing this to explore what my options are befoe we sit down to talk informally.
If I buy my partner out will i have to pay stamp duty and if so, what rate (I know this is posted somewhere but i don't have spare energy)?

patrickolee

Dont make hasty financial decisions while in an emotional state of mind. There is plenty of time, things may be clearer in a months time. Try not worry.

astrofool

I'd also mind not to let undue pressure be put on you, getting legal advice is the exact right thing to do, and as noted above, allows you to share the burden of what you're going through a bit.

I'd be wary of saying "6 months to heal/recover" as it's not something that you can accurately judge, and may end up putting things on the long finger for a long time, suddenly 6 months is gone and you have too much things that need to be done. It may be worth talking to a councillor as well.

If possible however, irregardless of what is done in the future (sell or buy out), an agreement needs to be put in place for how the mortgage is paid now, even if the decision is sell, it will need to be paid during the months the property is on the market, and if the decision is not sell, what constitutes buying the other out may be disputed if someone is paying a large portion of the mortgage. Your legal advice should cover this.

lushballs

Thanks for feedback. Yes I agree you cannot judge time needed. My gut is that i need the time to feel stronger in myself and to reflect on this transitional time in my life. I have big decions to make about my future.
I sat down this morning and worked out my budget, so that is done. I can afford to pay full mortgage. The agreed option was to get someone in to pay other half of mortgage but i am not interested in living with someone right now.
Will I have to pay stamp duty if I buy my ex out?

Alfaservice

Take the value of the house or what it could expect to acheive if sold in the morning. From that, subtract whatever is left on the mortgage. That leaves you with the net equity. Your wife would expect to receive half of this in the event that the house was sold and the proceeds divided and so this is the amount that she will be seeking to transfer her interest in the property to you. If it is less than €125k, you won't have any liability for stamp duty. Otherwise, it'll be 7% on everything over €125K.

If you enter into a Deed of Separation, you'll regain first buyer status, but only if your wife is still occupying of the family home at the date of the Deed. Sounds like she has already left in which case you won't qualify.

You should consider requesting a moratorium from your lending institution in respect of the existing mortgage. Some of them will grant a 6 month break. Separation generally is not accepted as a valid grounds for granting one. You should plea dire financial need and see if they can accomodate you.

lushballs

Thanks for feedback. This is really helping me to think outside the box and look at other options.
As it stands I think E120,000 would buy my ex out, whick is good news for me in relation to Stamp Duty ie won't have to pay any!!
Another question. Can you get a mortgage with the term extending past your retirement age? ie can you get a mortgage for 20 years if you are 50 years of age?

astrofool

Could it be worth the pain of buying your ex out now, and then you can sell at your leisure? Is the property going to be affected a lot by the house price crash (i.e. an apartment). I'd just balk at the thought of paying someone else's mortgage for them, when it is still partly their asset to be paid off.

lushballs

Dream house, fully kitted so should hold some of it's value during price crash.
It does 'hurt' to pay their half and have them benefit, particulary after they did 'the dirt' but I just need more time. On the other hand i do feel much stronger doing this now, so maybe I won't need the 6 months!