Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

70 Ways To Tell You've Been Online Too Long

Options
  • 13-02-2008 2:08am
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,521 ✭✭✭


    70 Ways To Tell You've Been Online Too Long

    1. Tech Support calls "YOU" for help.

    2. Someone at work tells you a joke and you say "LOL".

    3. You watch TV with the closed captioning turned on.

    4. You have called out someone's screen name while making love to
    your significant other.

    5. You keep begging your friends to get an account so "we can hang out".

    6. Three words: Carpal Tunnel Syndrome.

    7. You've even gotten on an airplane just to meet some folks face-to-
    face.

    8. You have to get a 2d phone line just so you can call Pizza Hut.

    9. You go into labour and you stop to type a special e-mail to let everyone
    know you're going to be away.

    10. You have a vanity car tag with your screen name on it.

    11. You no longer type with proper capitalization, punctuation, or
    complete sentences.

    12. You have met over 100 Boards.ie Members. (Unthrobbing)

    13. You begin to say "heh heh heh" instead of laughing.

    14. When someone says "What did you say?" you reply "Scroll up!"

    15. You find yourself sneaking away to the computer in the middle of the
    night when your spouse is asleep.

    16. You turn down the lights & close the blinds so people won't know
    you're on-line again.

    17. You know more about your Boards.ie friends' daily routines than you do your own spouses.

    18. You find yourself lying to others about your time on-line & when they
    complain that your phone was busy you claim it was off the hook.

    19. You have an identity crisis if someone is using a screen name close to
    your own.

    20. You would rather tell people that your bloodshot eyes are from
    partying too much than the truth (online all night).

    21. You change your screen names so much that you have to look at your own profile to see who you are.

    22. Your kids are standing at your side saying, "Mommy, please come and
    cook" dinner and you would rather type another "LOL".

    23. You type messages to people while you are on the phone with them at the same time.

    24. You won't work at a job that doesn't have a modem involved.

    25. Your dog leaves you.

    26. You have to ask what year it is.

    27. You write a letter like this.. "dear tom, hiyas! how r u doin well I gotta go bbl!"

    28. You name your pets after people you talk to.

    29. You smile sideways...

    30. You sign on & immediately get 10 IMs from people who have you on
    their buddy list.

    31. You look at an annoying person off-line & wish you had your ignore
    button handy.

    32. You bring a bag lunch & a cooler to the computer.

    33. Your significant other kisses your neck while you're chatting & you
    think "uh oh cyber sex perv".

    34. You have withdrawals if you are away from the computer for more
    than a few hours.

    35. You use Boards.ie lingo in everyday life (if you still have one he he he).

    36. You take a speed reading course to keep up with the scrolling.

    37. Your buddy list has over 100 people on it.

    38. Your worse comeback to a bully is "I'll slap ya w/a rubber chicken!"

    39. You wake up in the morning and the first thing you do is get online
    before you have your first cup of coffee.

    40. You have to inject no-doze into your butt to keep it awake.

    41. You have your computer set so it goes directly into Boards.ie welcome
    screen.

    42. You don't know where the time has gone.

    43. You end sentences with 3 (or more) periods while writing letters by
    hand.

    44. You get up at 2am to go to the bathroom but turn on the computer
    instead.

    45. You don't even notice anymore when someone has a typo.

    46. You enter a room & 23 people greet you w/((hugs)) or **kisses**.

    47. You stop typing whole words and use things like ppl, dunno and
    lemme.

    48. Your voicemail/answering machine message is "BRB, leave your s/n &
    I will TTYL".

    49. You type faster than you think.

    50. You got your psychiatrist addicted to Boards.ie too & are now undergoing therapy in private rooms instead of at his office.

    51. You want to be buried with your computer when it dies or vice versa.

    52. You actually enjoy the fact that you are addicted.

    53. You can actually read & follow all the names of the cast that scrolls up your TV screen at the end of a movie.

    54. People say, "If it weren't for your super reflexes in your eyes &
    fingers, you would have been classified as a vegetable!"

    55. You dream in "text".

    56. Being called a Newbie is a "MAJOR" insult.

    57. There is absolutely no interesting chat in any room & you're really
    bored.

    58. You don't want to leave in case you miss something.

    59. You double click your TV remote.

    60. You can now type over 70wpm.

    61. You think about starting a 12-step recovery group for Boards.ie junkies.

    62. You are on the phone a minute & need to do something else &
    say "BRB" or "BBL".

    63. You check your Email and forget you have real mail aka snail mail.

    64. You go into withdrawals during dinner.

    65. You spend at least 30 minutes making sure you say goodbye to
    everyone in a room.

    66. You stop speaking in full sentences.

    67. You have gone into an unstaffed Tech Support room & ended
    up "giving" tech support to other Boards.ie members.

    68. You have to be pried from your computer by the "Jaws of Life".

    69. You know what a "snert" is.

    70. You set your kitchen on fire while cooking dinner because you wanted
    to check your mail" & while there you "just wanted to see who was
    online".


Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 2,320 ✭✭✭Chet T16


    rocky25 wrote: »

    2. Someone at work tells you a joke and you say "LOL".

    I know someone that did that
    rocky25 wrote: »
    7. You've even gotten on an airplane just to meet some folks face-to-
    face.

    Married them!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,630 ✭✭✭folan


    when i really think about it, damn i do alot of that!

    I'm not a nerd, I can give up whenever I want!


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 91,886 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    3. You watch TV with the closed captioning turned on. teletext 888 ftw


    6. Three words: Carpal Tunnel Syndrome. just compo culture


    24. You won't work at a job that doesn't have a modem involved. oh please

    41. You have your computer set so it goes directly into Boards.ie welcome
    screen. pfff amatuers tabbed browsing rox


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,824 ✭✭✭RoyalMarine


    69. You know what a "snert" is.
    not a clue

    58. You don't want to leave in case you miss something.
    caught a few times on that

    59. You double click your TV remote.
    always to remove the red button on sky :)

    60. You can now type over 70wpm.
    121 words :D

    2. Someone at work tells you a joke and you say "LOL".
    working on a call centre i said to a customer hang on, ill just check with my commander :(
    i meant to say supervisor but t slipped out. was playing kingsofchaos at the time.

    i got slagged for a month over it.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,184 ✭✭✭Fey!


    Guilty of several of them...

    but what's a SNERP?


  • Advertisement
Advertisement