Trying to conceive/Planned parenthood/Assisted Reproduction Chat thread.

caprilicious

Hope you're ok applesock, its hard when someone you have to see nearly every day gets pregnant. Hopefully it'll be your month soon & you'll get your bfp x

mareliada welcome on board. I think Ms2011's advice is excellent, this could be the time to start keeping track of your cycle, so hopefully when your husband is feeling a bit better, you'll be prepared to get ttc right away.

Detectiv thanks a mill (again!!) for the info on the tests involved. I'm definitely going to get the day 3+21 tests done this month as soon as AF arrives.
Foolishly, because the day 3 one was ok, I thought the day 21 would be alright. I didn't not get it for that reason I just couldn't get near a doctors with work around the week after ovulation.
Your gp sounds great, mind unfortunately wont prescribe Clomid even where required, she only allows you to do it through a consultant

I think the idea of going to the Hari clinic is better (with the semen analysis) for the reason you mentioned & also because it wouldn't be as embarrassing/awkward for dh as it would going to the local gp.
Tigeress I think the lab my gp uses is in Kildare (I'm in Kilkenny) so its a pity as I think it'd be a bit awkward trying to get the sample & keep it cold til it got there.

Ok I have a plan. I'm going to get the 3+21 day bloods done. If they come back showing that I didn't ovulate and that Clomid or similar is required, I'm going to ask my GP does she know of another gp in Kilkenny/Waterford that will prescribe it for me.

I'll ask her while I'm at it if it would be possible to refer me for HSB/Lap test & work from there.
I've already waited patiently 6 months for my gynae consult only for them to lose my letter, put me to the end of the pile & have to wait another 6 monts.
I need to start doing something! (blame it on the hormones, very pre menstrual )

Detectiv I'll pm you my facebook, if anyone else wants to link up on facebook just pm me. Sometimes its nice even just to put a face to the name (or a name to the user name )
Don't worry, absolutely no ttc conversation on mine either.

DetectivFoxtrot

@ Mareliada, so sorry you are going through this, depression can be so debilitating even without the ttc issues. I think if you chart as previously advised you should be able to pinpoint when ovulation happens for you in a matter of a couple of months, then if your OH is up to it you should have sex the 2 days leading up to ovulation and the day of, I know that's 3 days in a row and a lot for some people, but if he could manage that each month you'd be giving it a good shot.
I'm not too familiar with depression but would it be possible for him to stop taking his meds around ovualtion time? It might make him more 'in the mood'? Maybe that's a crappy suggestion... Anyway it's good to talk so stay on here, some great support from people going through all sorts of sh1t.;) x

Neyite

Hi Cap,
I had the HSG xray, but since I didnt have the Lap with it, there was no anesthetic. Its as Detective described, and its over very quick. The reports varied on the pain level, some women described it as the worst ever, others felt it managable. I found it somewhere in between. It was slightly uncomfortable for most of the 5 mins it took, and maybe 10 -15 seconds of really sore, like a bad period cramp. I took two neurofen plus beforehand, which I'd say helped a good bit.

My OH produced the sample at the clinic at 10 am, and we had the couple appointment an hour later where they had his results and were able to discuss it there and then. I have found too that the doctors do try to minimise the cost for you if they can, but fertility treatment is expensive. Our initial consult was 200, plus 100 for the semen analysis, our 6 month review 150, and our clomid cycles are gonna cost 300 (100 if it becomes a cancelled cycle)

Best to start with your CD21 bloods anyway, hopefully you will get your sticky bean before too many investigations.

Neyite

edit... forgot.

I am on CD28 with no period. I did have some old blood spotting yesterday, but barely anything, and now its stopped completley. Trying not to get my hopes up, I have only had a 28 day cycle about 3 times in the last 2 years, its usually 26 days or so. Cheapie tests are negative.

And, and and am so proud of my OH. He is now a week off the cigs. He is now a non smoker.

DetectivFoxtrot

oooh Neyite, fingers crossed for you!!!!!
funny, my OH is giving up the ciggies tonight (again,:rolleyes:), making a big drama out of it too. We'll see how long it last......:p

iguana

mareliada wrote: »

hi everyone,
i dont know where else to turn, it is impossible to know who i could talk to who might understand. i despretely want a baby but at this stage i think i would be happy to accept to be even ttc.
my husband, due to anti depressant medication, has barely any interest in sex or even when we do, no ability to produce the magic stuff that might result in a baby.
it is devestatign for him and me. the doctors don't seem to care or offer any realistic advise. so i guess i need to learn to live with this. what i woudl give though for even a few months of a chance or hope that it might happen....

First off I have been in a similar situation to you as right after we started trying to conceive my husband became very ill, resulting in liver and kidney failure and was on medications for years that had really bad effect on his fertility, including mutagenic problems. So we had to shelve our plans for nearly 2 and a half years. It was incredibly hard, especially as I'd actually gotten pregnant on the first month but miscarried. And I'm afraid I have a bit more bad news. Many antidepressants, especially SSRIs, do similar, they have a damaging effect on both sperm function and sperm quality. So you need to find out all you can about specific tablets he is on and the effects they could be having before you do attempt to try. Thankfully this is reversible and the effects will go away within a few months of him ceasing taking any medication that may be causing these problems.

What you absolutely need to do is find a doctor who will take you seriously and do everything they can to help you solve this issue. My advice is to prepare a thick skin and either keep bringing up the issue with your doctor or start visiting new GPs until you find one who understands that this is a problem for the two of you that needs adequate care.

As far as what you can do personally, MS2011's suggestion to use the opportunity to learn about your body and cycles is a good one. Also start taking folic acid if you aren't already. Ideally you should have a build up of 3 months worth in your system prior to getting pregnant. And lastly, if you are taking a hormonal contraceptive, it might be time to consider coming off it. It can take months, or even up to a year, for your cycles to go back to normal after stopping. So this way when you and your husband have a solution re his medication, your body will be best prepared.

caprilicious

DetectivFoxtrot wrote: »

oooh Neyite, fingers crossed for you!!!!!
funny, my OH is giving up the ciggies tonight (again,:rolleyes:), making a big drama out of it too. We'll see how long it last......:p

Lol so did mine, last Monday....and the Monday before...and the Monday before that! I'm not pressuring him to give them up, he decided this himself but is finding it hard to stick to.

Neyite fair play to your OH for staying off them so far, fingers crossed he's off them for good now!
Thanks for the info on the HSG - do you get referred for that through your GP or through your gynae?

I'm not too far off yourself, I'm CD31, 14 days past ov but nothing stirring. I've done a cheapie test today & the past 2 days, each time a negative.

I think I've only one cheapie test left, so one that's gone I'll just wait for AF to arrive. This testing every day I think is nearly worse.
I can't not test when I know I have tests in the press, but the 3 minute wait for the result when you're wondering/hoping that second pink line will appear is frustrating!

I hope yours is a positive, I have very little faith in the cheapie tests so fingers crossed for you

newbie!

On cd32 now..think it's going to be a long cycle again ;( I reckon I ovulated last wkd sometime but boobs are only getting sore now. Have this feeling that this could be our month but i think it's just wishful thinking! Am off on hold on thurs do might just pop a preg test into my bag ( just in case)

newbie!

On cd32 now..think it's going to be a long cycle again ;( I reckon I ovulated last wkd sometime but boobs are only getting sore now. Have this feeling that this could be our month but i think it's just wishful thinking! Am off on hold on thurs do might just pop a preg test into my bag ( just in case)

iguana

I'm on CD24 now and my boobs aren't even at all sore. This is weird as for the last few months I had super sore boobs from CD17-CD19. I keep poking them to check they aren't hurting yet, which is the direct opposite of the last few months where I kept poking them to make sure they were still super sore.:o It'll be really funny if I end up pregnant on the month where my boobs don't hurt at all. Not that I'll complain.

newbie!

I have been charting the opk tests and cervical mucus but not other symptoms so I'm not sure when my boobs should be sore. We tried our very best this month anyway. I'm not sure even when to take preg test as last months cycle was something like 63 days!

DetectivFoxtrot

Ack! I should be 23 weeks preggo today. I have this pregnancy tracker thing on FertilityFriend that reminds me weekly, tells me how big I should be, and the baba etc. I don't want to delete it:o:(
why do I do this to myself.

Iguana you are a scream!

Neyite

No baby this month for me. Brown spotting started again today and a negative test this morning. First day of full red flow I've to call the clinic, so I will probably be doing that tomorrow to get a scan on Wednesday, then we can begin a clomid round again.

I dont get upset anymore when I get my period. I think I have accepted after 2 years that we are going to need medical help to have our family. I just hope that road is a short road for us. I didnt have my hopes up this cycle, so am not down about it today.

Hope the rest of you have better luck than me

DetectivFoxtrot

ah crapshoot Neyite! that stinks

Neyite

It does indeed. But I hope Clomid works for me. Doc has put me on it for 3 months, I reckon after that it might be IUI so hoping that this works.
If they produce the petri dishes then junior just aint going to college.

This is your Shag-week isnt it? I'm on Rag-week Lol :pac: (last week was Nag week cos of all the PMS) Are you feeling any better? less tender? More horny? hope it goes well for you. I have my fingers crossed for you this cycle.

Keep your ticker for as long as you need, but if it upsets you then you might need to hide it.

caprilicious

Neyite, sorry this month wasn't for you
I think I'm out of the game this month also, no sign of AF yet, plenty of cramps during the night though & another negative pregnancy test this morning.

I hope too your journey will be a short one with a BFP at the end of it

I just wish at this stage that AF would hurry the feck up so I can get my day 3+21 bloods done.
Just out of curiosity, does is have to be day 3 or how early/late in the cycle can the first test be?
I'm just thinking if AF doesn't arrive til Wednesday, then it'll be day 3 Saturday when the gp's are closed & will be Monday/day 5 before I could get tested hmmmmmmm.

Detectiv I had the same on Eumom so I ended up not using it, I couldn't find how to delete it & it kept prompting what stage in the pregnancy I should be.
As an aside, I find the charting feature on fertility friend very good. Handy for a bird brain like me with a tendency to forget dates!

Newbie, fingers crossed your cycle wont be so long this month x

Neyite

It does not necessarily need to be day 3 Cap,

On my clinic letter they said that I had to do it between days 3-7. (as long as its pre-ovulation) and after day 21 assuming a regular enough cycle.

iguana

I had one of those pregnancy tracker updates and when I cancelled it, it sent me an automatic sympathetic message. I guess who ever programmes them knows that there is only one reason to cancel them.:(

caprilicious

iguana wrote: »

I had one of those pregnancy tracker updates and when I cancelled it, it sent me an automatic sympathetic message. I guess who ever programmes them knows that there is only one reason to cancel them.:(

I think that would bother me more or at least as much as getting the notifications

Thanks Neyite that's good to know, I would hate to think that I'd have to wait a further month just to get the bloods taken. I'm still kicking myself for not getting them done months ago :rolleyes:

iguana

caprilicious wrote: »

I think that would bother me more or at least as much as getting the notifications

It did. I'd have preferred to just cancel it and let that be that.

carolinespring

I treated myself to a blow dry on Saturday morning and while waiting I read Womens own. A story about a woman who had 29 MCs and 2 still births but in the end got her little girl. made me start thinking ever more so that I want to give it one last go. Don't want to hit 50 and wonder if it would have happened. We are going to give it the summer and wait until after due date in Oct. I think my mind is made up and my husband is with me on it.

I feel very unhappy with my body since the loss. over the last couple of years I lost a lot of weight going from a size 24 to a 18 and was feel fantastic. When I fell I was a 18, but since the miss I do nothing but eat and to be honest am self medicating with food so its time to bang that on the head and do something about it. That is going to be my focus for the next couple of months.

Need to look after myself. I have more good days than bad now and feel I am coping much better this time than the last. Today was not the best due to a dig from a former friend who is a drama queen

So ladies, here is to a good week for us all.

newbie!

Caroline, I think we all self medicate with food. For me the only thing that works is to have a good friend nearby to bounce off and walk with. I'm relatively new to the forum but had many difficult issues years ago that I dont feel comfortable discussing here. I lived on my nerves back then, had constant panic attacks nf generally felt ver very very low. Time is a great healer though. I hope you get a handle on things soon and do whatever feels right for you and your husband. X

caprilicious

newbie! wrote: »

Caroline, I think we all self medicate with food. For me the only thing that works is to have a good friend nearby to bounce off and walk with.

This is so true (I've already had 5 penguin bars & half a tub of cookie dough today ), Fair play to you for dropping so many sizes, that can't have been easy.
I rely on this forum a lot as I don't have people in the real world to talk about these things with.
Its amazing what a taboo subject some people find infertility :rolleyes:

Caroline I really admire your attitude & I do think you're right to try again. I really hope when you're 50 you will be looking back thinking you were glad to have given it another go.

Ms2011

Applesock I have my fingers crossed for you this month, I've got alot preggers friends at the moment too, on the days I'm not feeling too good it can be enough to tip me over the edge. It will be our time soon enough, the waiting is just so hard sometimes though!

Newbie can't wait to hear whether you get your BFP, best of luck

Iguana, sore boobs for me means AF rather than a good pregnancy symptom so like you I keep checking to see if they are sore and am relieved when they are not. I'm at 3dpo and my boobs usually start hurting at 4dpo when I have a unsuccessful month so I'm praying I don't wake up with sore boobs tomorrow!!!

DTF when Fertility Friend gives me my possible due date and then AF shows up I find it hard when that date comes round and I haven't even been pregnant so I'm sure it's a million times harder for you. If you get some comfort from it then what's the harm

Neyite, I'm sorry this wasn't your month, I think your postive attitude is great, I hope the medical tests help make the road to your BFP a short one!

Cap best of luck with your tests, I hope they can give you the answers you need to deliver your baba to you

Oh Carolinespring that's great news that you are going to try again and congrats on the weight loss. I don't think anyone would begrudge you some comfort eating under the circumstances though x

Ironically this month AF is due on 23rd which also happens to be my 31st birthday, so I'm either going to have a really happy birthday or a really depressing one, fingers crossed it's not the latter :)

Lucyfur

Day 1 of another cycle BOOM :cool:

One more and we can start trying again :D:D



In other news, ouch and please pass the chocolate. Now. Ta very much.

DetectivFoxtrot

omg Cap, you had five penguins today, was that 5, you horse!! :hehehe, joking! I'd have 5 of them ate in 2 mimutes, and the cookie dough ice cream wouldn't be seen for dust either!

Neyite, I lol'd at your post. Yes, this week is my 'shag week' but I still don't feel horny at all and the more the cycle goes on the more tender my ute is becoming, possibly as the follie's and lining get bigger. I have a feeling ovulation will be painful this month. Am on day 15 and have only had sex once - 3 days ago:eek:. We meant to go last night but neither of us had the energy. Will get busy tonight!:cool: My ovulation tests are still neg so I've plenty of time I s'pose. One great thing about this cycle is I'm totally not stressing, it's weird. Am usually obsessing by now. Even my chart looks boring, am only logging major events and symptoms.

Applesock, fingers crossed that this is the month for you!

Caroline, great attitude to have, fair play to ya. Sometimes reading those kind of stories gives us great inspiration. I always feel like a real moanbag when I read someone has had many losses and it helps me to be a bit more positive about my own situation.

I should correct my previous post about the pregnancy notification thingy. It's not a tracker as such, like a cycle tracker, it's just this feature on FF where you can track your pregnancy symptoms etc. But each week it gives an update as to what stage you should be at. The good thing is I have to click in to see it, it's not like it pops up with reminders or anything, couldn't cope with that at all. When I get pg again I'll reset it to the start, for the moment it's still a bit of a comfort and reminds me of the wee baba that wasn't meant to be.
When I was pg I got daily updates via email from Babybumps.com. Cancelled that as soon as I m/c'd, there was no way I could cope with daily tidbits of how great my non existent pregnancy is. The FF one just nicely reminds me of where I should be at timewise.... sigh....

caprilicious

Meet your sister, day 1 here also & I'm like a fiend for chocolate today!

I'm feeling pretty bright about it as it means I can ring tomorrow & book my blood test for Friday.
That's brill that you've only a month to go til you can try again, finger crossed it'll fly by

DetectivFoxtrot

Lucyfur at first I was gonna boo the new cycle, but seeing as you're on a countdown to ttc'ing again (which I keep forgetting:o) I'm going to go with \O/ yay! instead!

DetectivFoxtrot

caprilicious wrote: »

Meet your sister, day 1 here also

ack!!!:mad: sorry this cycle is bust!

Lucyfur

Cap, that's me that just added you on facebook:)

Right ladies, I'm being dragged to the waterfall for a walk. Bleugh.