Newest security threat to Britain's shores

Rob_l

FISH!
A Fish that can walk on land for four days and likes to eat humans! Nice, Nice

Link includes a picture of feckin ugly looking fish

The SUN wrote:

A SAVAGE fish more terrifying than a piranha has been caught in Britain for the first time — sparking fears of a deadly invasion.

The vicious giant snakehead EATS everything it comes across and has even been reported to KILL people.

The monster — from south-east Asia — has a mouth crammed with fearsome teeth, can “crawl” on land and survive out of water for up to four days.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article817553.ece
http://www.news.com.au/mercury/story/0,22884,23245195-5005940,00.html

xzanti

Looks well p1ssed off too... Lets just hope the fcuker stays in Britain

biko

Classic AH material

funk-you

Bet i'd kick it's ass.

-Funk

Fratton Fred

Thank god for the Sun, without them we would all be fish food...or Muslim:rolleyes:

RxQueen

time for them to start building a wall god dam it

Rob_l

Fratton Fred wrote: »

Thank god for the Sun, without them we would all be fish food...or Muslim:rolleyes:

Exactly and I haven't even got a prayer mat or swimming trunks with me

ScumLord

Whats the big fuss about, I for one welcome our new fishy overlords..

Rob_l

Everyone laughed when george bush said man and fish could live peacefully perhaps he foreseen this

http://www.thatsweird.net/funny_george_bush11.shtml


I for one will back Britain and their American allies war in the sea!

Black Swan

Somethin's fishy about that report.

funk-you

Blue_Lagoon wrote: »

Somethin's fishy about that report.

Swe-swe-swe.......hmmm.

-Funk

Petey2006

There's only one course of action. Wipe out everything in the seas and rivers.

Dragan

And we will all remember exactly what we were doing......when the fish came.....

You Suck!

Oh FFS!

An Environment Agency source said last night: “The reaction was, ‘Oh s***’. This is the ultimate invasive species — if it starts breeding here it’s a disaster.”

Yes, because civil servants use expletives on a regular basis with the public :rolleyes:

Didn't think it possible for the sun to dredge any lower, but hey.....putting the shíts in to idiots is a profitable business.

Behold the vicious monster.......YARRR!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Channidae

If they pay for this level of "journalism", then i want a job mista murdoch!

MarkR

I just googled that fish. WAY less impressive on wikipedia. I was going to get one as a pet and walk it around town.

missingtime

Does it go well with baby potatoes? There is only so much Sea Bass you can eat.

Nom, Nom, Nom.


I HATE The Sun, such a bunch of sensationalist ****

Dave!

That's one mean-looking fish.....

rubadub

A SAVAGE fish more terrifying than a piranha has been caught in Britain for the first time — sparking fears of a deadly invasion

Who is sparking fears?, oh right, the sun themselves...

Terry

Just kick the fúcker. It's not that hard.

FunkZ

Ah here, yis all have a couple of ****ing doors in yer gafs. And how's that yoke gonna get up a stairs?!

Rob_l

FunkZ wrote: »

Ah here, yis all have a couple of ****ing doors in yer gafs. And how's that yoke gonna get up a stairs?!

But what if I live in a bungalow with swinging doors what then :eek:
What then?

jebuz

am i herring you correctly? oh cod now we are in trouble. this is trawl we need...

i'll let myself out yeah?

FunkZ

Rob_l wrote: »

But what if I live in a bungalow with swinging doors what then :eek:
What then?

Well then you'll have to build a moat around your house.

Oh wait! Get a tent for your roof.

FruitLover

Rob_l wrote: »

But what if I live in a bungalow with swinging doors what then :eek:
What then?

Time to invest in a pair of stilts.

phasers

Best pet ever


imagine bringing that for a walk?

Splinter

the guy from jaws dies and this happens... ahh ****

Hail 2 Da Chimp

Heh Sid Fishious!

cjt156

jebuz wrote: »

am i herring you correctly? oh cod now we are in trouble. this is trawl we need...

This is no plaice for that kind of carp - please don't make a halibut of it.

Kur4mA

Omg Someone Get Chuck Norris On The Blower!!!

GhostInTheRuins

Aw Jaysus Chantal, look a dis, dey have monster fish over der now. I cant belieeeeeve eeh.

Wikipedia wrote:

Snakeheads feed on plankton, aquatic insects, and mollusks when small. When adult, they mostly feed on other fish like carp, or frogs.

:rolleyes:

jebuz

cjt156 wrote: »

This is no plaice for that kind of carp - please don't make a halibut of it.

Are you searious? you don't want to make an anemone out of me

seamus

Oh man, I hate the sun so much. They might as well rename it, "Britain's SCARIEST news stories", and have that cheesy plastic-faced American ex-police officer narrate it.

Although I love hearing about fish that can walk on land. "Evolution is such a crock of **** isn't it? WHERE IS THE MISSING LINK?". "Uh, Joe, what's that weird fish thing gnawing on your leg?"

Voodu Child

All these fish puns are giving me a head-hake. AH is manta be funny, but this thread is pollock's tbh..

Dyr

this fish story is a cod. Or a red herring. It can't be for eel.

etc etc

dlofnep

Terrorist fish.. Interesting.

jebuz

Bambi wrote: »

this fish story is a cod. Or a red herring. It can't be for eel.

etc etc

here now you can't reuse puns (cod,herring) but 'for eel'....brilliant! I couldn't think of that in my breams. Anyway i think we should fin-ish up with the fish puns, sole long everyone

splinter

splinter wrote: »

the guy from jaws dies and this happens... ahh ****

LOL

Well at least we have Rob Schneider, he can impersonate anything.

BlitzKrieg

FunkZ wrote: »

Ah here, yis all have a couple of ****ing doors in yer gafs. And how's that yoke gonna get up a stairs?!

It'll take the lift obviously...



Off topic, I feel like watching Piranha 2 flying devils again.

thecheese

And they told us to nuke the whales.. :rolleyes:

I for one vote we nuke these guys instead

Dyr

I heard these yokes actually landed here late last year but it was covered up under the ofishial secrets act

Rob_l

If i was an angler and this thread a fish i'd be throwing it back in

!_Brian_!

Blue_Lagoon wrote: »

Somethin's fishy about that report.

Think their only codding us! A sternly worded letter should put them in their plaice!

Defenestrate

Damned immigrant fishes, taking our jobs and women! :mad:;)

Terry

seamus wrote: »

Oh man, I hate the sun so much. They might as well rename it, "Britain's SCARIEST news stories", and have that cheesy plastic-faced American ex-police officer narrate it.

Although I love hearing about fish that can walk on land. "Evolution is such a crock of **** isn't it? WHERE IS THE MISSING LINK?". "Uh, Joe, what's that weird fish thing gnawing on your leg?"

To the christianity forum, Batman.

galwayrush

UK's immigration policy gone to feck:rolleyes:

antodeco

Fratton Fred wrote: »

Thank god for the Sun, without them we would all be fish food...or Muslim:rolleyes:

Uh oh, but theres a lunar eclipse tonight! Dont go having a bath downstairs between 12:05 and 3:30 am!!

Ah brilliant article. USING CAPS ALWAYS MAKES THINGS SEEM MORE IMPORTANT

NoQuarter

sure the great whites off england will get them before they get us, there'll be swimming with manta rays in the thames next!

when whale they ever learn!!:rolleyes:

pirelli

FunkZ wrote: »

Ah here, yis all have a couple of ****ing doors in yer gafs. And how's that yoke gonna get up a stairs?!

Belly flop....
Bite the cats ass and hang on until it lands in its owners lap.
some people have chair lifts.
Swim up the pipes pop out the jacks and up their arse.
If its lashing rain swim up the gutter into the attic and chew through the ceiling and let gravity drop it into what would be a pool of blood on a bed in a few seconds you might just glimpse it high diving into your bellys guts before the bucket clatters light and your life into the darkness.
Chew its way through the woodwork and seek out warm spots.
Use the house electric wires like spagetti and suck through the wires until it pops out of an upstairs socket.
Use the carpeting to funnel its way to its target.

Beelzebub

The toilet paper never refused...

2 stroke

emo!! wrote: »

time for them to start building a wall god dam it

A fish that can build walls, OMG.