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The Pun appreciation thread!

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    #362
    Homer
    Registered Users Posts: 4,315 ✭✭✭Homer


    It's just like a cowboy to stirrup trouble.


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    #363
    dak
    Registered Users Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭dak


    The sky was dark
    The moon was high
    All alone just she and I
    Her hair was soft
    Her eyes were blue
    I knew just what
    She wanted to do
    Her skin so soft
    Her legs so fine
    I ran my fingers
    Down her spine
    I didn't know how
    But I tried my best
    I started by placing
    My hands on her breast
    I remember my fear
    My fast beating heart
    But slowly she spread
    Her legs apart
    And when I did it
    I felt no shame
    All at once
    The white stuff came
    At last it's finished
    It's all over now
    My first time ever
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    At milking a cow...


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    #364
    dak
    Registered Users Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭dak


    Milk........Milk.............Milk.................Milk....................Milk Milk........Milk.............Milk.................Milk....................Milk
    Milk........Milk.............Milk.................Milk....................Milk
    Milk........Milk.............Milk.................Milk....................Milk
    Milk........Milk.............Milk.................Milk....................Milk Milk........Milk.............Milk.................Milk....................Milk

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    If you read the above you have just experienced past your eyes milk !


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    #365
    Al_Fernz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,021 ✭✭✭Al_Fernz


    Have we exhausted all our puns on the whole dairy theme, or will we be avonmore?


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    #366
    dak
    Registered Users Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭dak


    Al_Fernz wrote: »
    Have we exhausted all our puns on the whole dairy theme, or will we be avonmore?

    Thats a Premier question..........I'm sure we can churn something up ? Don't bottle it yet !


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    #367
    Homer
    Registered Users Posts: 4,315 ✭✭✭Homer


    dak wrote: »
    Thats a Premier question..........I'm sure we can churn something up ? Don't bottle it yet !

    Cream of the crop there :pac:


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    #368
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    industria wrote: »
    Cream of the crop there :pac:
    you're milking it for all it's worth, pull the udder one!


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    #369
    Homer
    Registered Users Posts: 4,315 ✭✭✭Homer


    When I went to buy lots of milk and ice cream, I got a fair shake.


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    #370
    dak
    Registered Users Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭dak


    industria wrote: »
    When I went to buy lots of milk and ice cream, I got a fair shake.


    Last time I went near a fridge for icecream I was Friesian and had to put on my Jersey before I Hereford the hills near Aberdeen in my Limousine .

    Last time I sat near a cow I got a pat on the head !


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    #371
    The Bollox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,372 ✭✭✭The Bollox


    dak wrote: »
    Last time I sat near a cow I got a pat on the head !

    that's bull**** :pac:


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    #372
    dak
    Registered Users Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭dak


    The Bollox wrote: »
    that's bull**** :pac:

    Man'ure quick !


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    #373
    Gordon
    Registered Users Posts: 35,524 ✭✭✭✭Gordon


    Potty


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    #374
    toosb
    Closed Accounts Posts: 29 ✭toosb


    If you faeces fits.....


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    #375
    Homer
    Registered Users Posts: 4,315 ✭✭✭Homer


    Look what you've started... The sh*t is gonna hit the fan now!


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    #376
    toosb
    Closed Accounts Posts: 29 ✭toosb


    industria wrote: »
    Look what you've started... The sh*t is gonna hit the fan now!

    Are you poo-pooing what I have said?


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    #377
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    toosb wrote: »
    Are you poo-pooing what I have said?
    Not at all! it's pooh sticks under the bridge...


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    #378
    Black Swan
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 47,260 CMod ✭✭✭✭Black Swan


    How much more pun-ishment can we take?


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    #379
    dak
    Registered Users Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭dak


    This pooh thread has gone Fart o far and is now cr*p !

    How about a few bakery puns ? The yeast we could do is rise to the occasion !


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    #380
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    You yeast have have to use your loaf and earn some bread.


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    #381
    dak
    Registered Users Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭dak


    Deleted User wrote: »
    You yeast have have to use your loaf and earn some bread.

    Time to Ryes and shine ! No Loafing around!


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    #382
    The Bollox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,372 ✭✭✭The Bollox


    these bakery puns are making me croissant. I am getting a sliced pan in my head, I think it's a headache!


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    #383
    dak
    Registered Users Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭dak


    I once met a Monsieur Baguette hailing form Toulose . He always claimed he was French bred !


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    #384
    Al_Fernz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,021 ✭✭✭Al_Fernz


    The Bollox wrote: »
    these bakery puns are making me croissant. I am getting a sliced pan in my head, I think it's a headache!

    Dough! I wanted to come up with that pun...but I guess you guys are on a roll.


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    #385
    dak
    Registered Users Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭dak


    Al_Fernz wrote: »
    Dough! I wanted to come up with that pun...but I guess you guys are on a roll.

    Someone has to make a crust !


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    #386
    The Bollox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,372 ✭✭✭The Bollox


    what did the hash brownie say to the spliff?

    I'm baked

    :pac::pac::pac::pac:


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    #387
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Life's like that, you get old and then you're brown bread!


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    #388
    Thrill
    Registered Users Posts: 5,485 ✭✭✭Thrill


    These puns are only fair, but I toast the effort.


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    #389
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Thrill wrote: »
    These puns are only fair, but I toast the effort.


    Are you trying to butter us up! :)

    It's good to spread some happiness.


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    #390
    dak
    Registered Users Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭dak


    Has this thread gone a bit stale ! What we knead is some dough so we can get out of this jam and go on holidays ! I think a Jumbo roll is in order ! Or is that a half baked idea ?


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    #391
    Al_Fernz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,021 ✭✭✭Al_Fernz


    Did anybody hear about the wig shop robbery last night? Police have been called and are combing the area for clues...


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