The Pun appreciation thread!

Beanstalk

Yeah, generally pig puns are really good, although sometimes they can be such a boar...

Fredser

What did Peter Kay sing as he jumped up and down on a scouring pad?

......

"Is this the way to harm a brillo...."

It BeeMee

Where does Quasimodo keep his pet rabbit?

In a hutch, back of notre Dame

Hagar

What's made of bread and cheese and rings the bells in the belfry?
The lunchpack of Notre Dame.

randylonghorn

Careful now, I could see some people getting the hump about that one ...

Beanstalk

Anyone who jumps out of the bell tower of Notre Dame is clearly in Seine.

Kimono-Girl

Thrill wrote: »

Cattle trying to escape their inevitable doom are a bunch of cow herds tbh.

thats the worst pun ever!!!!

Sherifu

candlelover wrote: »

thats the worst pun ever!!!!

It was a load of bull alright.

RadioCity

Are you going to start milking the cow puns now for all they're worth?

I'm not Avonmore of it.

Sorry about the cow puns. I think I'll just go and hide.

Tell that to the bird watcher who puts cannabis on his bird table, so that he leaves no tern unstoned!

Beanstalk

Hmm, looks like the cow puns are gonna be heifer for a while yet!

el_barty

Is there any udder topic we cud pursue?

Beanstalk

Deleted User wrote: »

Tell that to the bird watcher who puts cannabis on his bird table, so that he leaves no tern unstoned!

Sounds like that bird watcher made a right hash of things...

Thrill

candlelover wrote: »

thats the worst pun ever!!!!

You'll have to forgive me for that one, I'm a bit of a maverick when it comes to puns.

dak

There were two ships. One had red paint, one had blue paint. They collided. At last report, the survivors were marooned.

The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up and asked, "Did you get my drift?"

Thrill

dak wrote: »

The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up and asked, "Did you get my drift?"

Icy what you mean.

markb86

you should all be locked up in the punitentiary,
So I went to a seafood disco the other night and pulled a mussel, but she was a very shellfish lover and only wanted my cockles

This couple went on a sea cruise to sea if they could save their marriage, but they soon drifted apart!

Beanstalk

dak wrote: »

The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up and asked, "Did you get my drift?"

thrill wrote:

Icy what you mean.

Thats a pretty serious issue these days so we shouldn't be laughing, it snow joke!

Thrill

Beanstalk wrote: »

Thats a pretty serious issue these days so we shouldn't be laughing, it snow joke!

Ah, come on. It's not that serious. Chill.




.

Beanstalk

what did the cop say to the melting incestual snowman?

'FREEZE MOTHER****ER!'

dak

The Gardai called to Beanstalks House to arrest him for starting this thread . However no-one was at home
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Neighbours who heard the commotion have stated that all that was heard was

"Oh pun this door " and pun out with your hands up !

dak

Tiger Wood missed out on a large prize last week in South Carolina as he thought the "Mrytle Beach Ohpun " was a joke !

Beanstalk

I thought he refused to play because the putting greens there were in such terrible condition. he said last time he was there he even got a hole in one....

RadioCity

Just two golf puns?

Can you not manage fore?

mickrourke

RadioCity wrote: »

Just two golf puns?

Can you not manage fore?

I wood try, but i'm about to have my tee

Thrill

Lets treat everyone posting golf puns in a fair way.

mickrourke

Thrill wrote: »

Lets treat everyone posting golf puns in a fair way.

Exactly, no need to rule with an iron fist or be too rough

RadioCity

These golf puns are nonsense and seem to be on a par with the previous cow puns.

Of course we should continue though.

Beanstalk

Did you hear about the nuclear terrorist attack on the most recent u.s. open? Everyone ran for the bunkers but no-one survived. Trying to avoid nuclear fallout by burying your head in the sand is a big no-no.