making friends in cavan

kimsmith63

Hi all,

Moved to Ireland 6 months ago from the UK, and am moving to Cavan town in the next few weeks.

We have found in the area we are living in at the moment (dont really want to say where)that the irish people in our small community arent very accepting of us, this is the main reason we are moving to a town.

Just wanted to know really if we are doing the right thing moving to Cavan have other people found any prejudices?

Also we are moving to the Rocklands estate, is it ok there?

We are a couple in our 40s and like to think we are friendly and open but are finding it very difficult at the moment. Any reassurance would be great.

Gadjodilo

I don't know Rocklands but I doubt ye'd have any problems. By and large, people live and let live here, I think.

Why do ye feel ye weren't accepted? Could you give us a few examples, please?

kimsmith63

hi Gadjodilo, thanks for the reply, a few examples! where do i start?
My hubby started a job he is in a skilled trade and was told on his first day that the section he was on didnt like the english and to be on his toes! obviously he never felt comfortable there from day one, some people would sing irish rebel songs while sitting at lunch, writing nastly things in the toilets etc.Subsequently my husband has left the job. Our neighbours dont acknowledge us if we try to say hello. Im not saying it is everyone but there does seem to be a majority here. we previously lived in Leitrim for 3 months and couldnt have met nicer people. So we are trying to be really cautious about where we are going this time, we would have loved to go back to Leitrim but there are very few jobs.

Saibh

welcome to cavan

there is a local pub called the orchard down the road from rocklands, it also has a restaurant there. its a while since i was in it but hopefully you can meet some people there. some housing estates have neighbourhood watch. some of the house could be rented out so that may be why they might not bother communicating so much.

hopefully it will work out for both of you.

flanum

i lived in rocklands last year, its ok, an awful lot of the houses seem to be rented tho, mainly construction workers, garda,teachers etc, so it doesnt really have that "community" feel to it yet. its still fairly new, they now have a creche up there so give it time and im sure itll grow to be a friendly estate.
As regards meetin people, gettin to know people etc, the "local" pub, the orchard would be a good bet for ye, its only a short walk from rocklands.
good luck.

kimsmith63

Thanks flanum and saibh, for your replies we are really looking forward to moving there and as my hubby has an interview next week we are up there for a few days so hopefully will get a feel for the place. thanks again

Gadjodilo

kimsmith63 wrote: »

hi Gadjodilo, thanks for the reply, a few examples! where do i start?
My hubby started a job he is in a skilled trade and was told on his first day that the section he was on didnt like the english and to be on his toes! obviously he never felt comfortable there from day one, some people would sing irish rebel songs while sitting at lunch, writing nastly things in the toilets etc.Subsequently my husband has left the job. Our neighbours dont acknowledge us if we try to say hello. Im not saying it is everyone but there does seem to be a majority here. we previously lived in Leitrim for 3 months and couldnt have met nicer people. So we are trying to be really cautious about where we are going this time, we would have loved to go back to Leitrim but there are very few jobs.

I must say I'm UTTERLY flummoxed by this story. I know quite a few English people (yes, real English, not the hyphenated ones) living around Cavan and I've never heard a word of complaint.

For starters, take a case with the Equality Authority. This is a clear cut case of racism. Secondly, tell us what part of the county do you live in? I don't see why saying that here could be an issue.

kimsmith63

ok we live in Portarlington Laois, I didnt want to say where it was as im sure there must be some nice people here and i dont want to upset anyone

Gadjodilo

kimsmith63 wrote: »

ok we live in Portarlington Laois, I didnt want to say where it was as im sure there must be some nice people here and i dont want to upset anyone

Okay. For some reason, I'd thought you'd had that bad experience somewhere in Cavan. I think you should post your story in the Laois forum too. They need to know about this. Who cares if you offend a few people? Their right not to be offended is not as important are you and your husband's right to live and work in peace and unhindered.

I would also really urge you again to contact the Equality Authority. You can find their contact details here:
http://www.equality.ie/index.asp?locID=65&docID=-1

An email wouldn't commit you to anything. I'm sure they'd be happy to handle it in whatever way you feel most comfortable. Even if you never got a red cent out of the company, it would be a timely shot across their bows and might save someone else from a similar experience in the future.

kimsmith63

Thanks G, no we are moving to Cavan to get away from it sorry i thought i made it clear in my previous posts. My husband left the job on Friday and we both have interviews in Cavan next week, so we are keeping our fingers crossed. Thanks for the Equality Authority link its worth thinking about definately.

What ever happens we are moving to Cavan in the next few weeks we are lucky financially to be able to do it although neither of us have secured jobs yet. You have all been great on this site and it certainly makes us feel better about the choice we have made to move. so thanks really to everyone.

joecarolan123@g

hi im joe .you should have no problems with the ppl .i visit 2or 3 times a year and allways find the local ppl very friendly .best of i hope it all works well for you both
joe

kimsmith63

thanks joe, we hope so too.

flanum

BTW i hope ye have wellies and good rain gear... its not the lake county for nothing!

ports best

hi kimsmith, im from portarlington and im disgusted to hear how you and your husband are getting treated down here, they are the type of people that would like ireland to stay in the dark ages, its sad you have to move and i would report it to someone,

Debracd

Hey Kim(I think we've 'met' )

The people of Cavan seem to be very accepting of blow ins We only moved here from Meath last year. Now, that's not as big a move obviously, but before that we were living 20mins from my home town and the people there really hated blow ins, we just couldn't make friends, nor could the kids because they were considered outsiders :rolleyes:

People in Cavan seem to be very laid back and just get on with their own business, if you want to make friends you'll have no problem doing so, but if you want to keep to yourself they'll leave ya to it aswell.

marco murphy

kimsmith63 wrote: »

hi Gadjodilo, thanks for the reply, a few examples! where do i start?
My hubby started a job he is in a skilled trade and was told on his first day that the section he was on didnt like the english and to be on his toes! obviously he never felt comfortable there from day one, some people would sing irish rebel songs while sitting at lunch, writing nastly things in the toilets etc.Subsequently my husband has left the job. Our neighbours dont acknowledge us if we try to say hello. Im not saying it is everyone but there does seem to be a majority here. we previously lived in Leitrim for 3 months and couldnt have met nicer people. So we are trying to be really cautious about where we are going this time, we would have loved to go back to Leitrim but there are very few jobs.

I would'nt let that go. Look at your legal options. Very immature behaviour, pisses me right off. :mad:

kimsmith63

hi everyone

just a quick update, we have just spent the last few days in cavan, and it was like a breath of fresh air! Everywhere we went everybody was friendly, the area and town were fantastic. My hubbys interview went well and subject to references and medical he should start his new job soon. To top it all we found a lovely detached house to rent in a beatiful area overlooking the town and cathedral . We are moving on the 4th April and cant wait. again thanks to you all.

Saibh

thats great to hear

welcome to cavan:)

genericgoon

Debracd wrote: »

Hey Kim(I think we've 'met' )

The people of Cavan seem to be very accepting of blow ins We only moved here from Meath last year. Now, that's not as big a move obviously, but before that we were living 20mins from my home town and the people there really hated blow ins, we just couldn't make friends, nor could the kids because they were considered outsiders :rolleyes:

People in Cavan seem to be very laid back and just get on with their own business, if you want to make friends you'll have no problem doing so, but if you want to keep to yourself they'll leave ya to it aswell.

We accept people so we can get their money. We just act friendly to lull you into a false sense of security. :P

cournioni

genericgoon wrote: »

We accept people so we can get their money. We just act friendly to lull you into a false sense of security. :P

Oi! Cheeky!!

Welcome to Cavan Kim!

kimsmith63

Theres always one!!!!!!!!!!!

Debracd

genericgoon wrote: »

We accept people so we can get their money. We just act friendly to lull you into a false sense of security. :P

Lucked out here, I only moved up here because it's a bit closer to the north, where things are cheap

kimsmith63

hi deb

moving tomorrow whippeeee! ill be in touch for that coffee

Debracd

Good luck Kim! See ya soon!