~Jokes~

rocky25

Diet Communion:

As the title says, a catholic woman who was over weight and never off diets got together with the manufacturer of communion wafers to create a diet version of the holy offering.

After trials of taste texture etc a marketing group said they couldn’t tell the difference.

As a result they were manufactured and marketed and called,


“I can’t believe it’s not Jesus”.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three little ducks go into a Bar.............................


"Say, what's your name?" the bartender asked the first duck.
"Huey," was the reply.
"How's your day been, Huey?"

"Great. Lovely day. Had a ball. Been in and out of puddles all day. What else could a duck want?" said Huey.
"Oh. That's nice," said the bartender. He turned to the second duck, "Hi, and what's your name?"

"Dewey," came the answer from duck number two.
"So how's your day been, Dewey! ?" he asked.

"Great. Lovely day. I've had a ball too. ?Been in and out of puddles all day myself. What else could a duck want?"
The bartender turned to the third duck and said, "So, you must be Louie?"


"No," she said, batting her eyelashes.




"My name is Puddles."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A man walks up to a woman in his office each day, stands very close to her, draws in a large breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice.


After a week of this she can't stand it any longer! The woman goes into her supervisor's office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against the man and explains why.


The supervisor is puzzled by this and says, "What's wrong with the co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?"


The woman replies,







"He's a midget!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~

What do you want on your Tombstone?

http://www.jjchandler.com/tombstone/

mickrourke

The communion one is excellent
Transubstantion indeed!