Alternative to Alcoholics Anonymous

collie50

Alternative to Alcoholics Anonymous

Hope Im putting this in the correct spot

Does anyone one know anything about SMART RECOVERY as an alternative to AA. I had a look at their web site and it seems positive.

Does anyone know if they have any groups or meetings in Dublin?

That 12 step thing just isnt for me:eek:

dercun

Never used Smart Recovery, but the one I have used and found great is unhooked.com

collie50

Hi,


Im aware the guys who created this non drinkers forum dont want it to become a rehab spot but do unhooked run meetings in Ireland?

I dont want to be to critical of AA but it does my head right in.
Just cant deal with that religious 12 step higher power stuff!

http://www.deanesmay.com/archives/006854.html

NonDrinkersClub

Hi - this is good advice for people who have drinking problems and want to give up, however, I don't think it's a great place to advertise!

collie50

Advertise what?

smart recovery or unhooked or what? none of which appear to run in ireland? or perhaps you mean the link to deans...

Can you please explain as Im not sure what you mean?

Thanks

NonDrinkersClub

I just mean that non-drinkers & a recovering alcoholics are very different types of people and this is not really a good place to post links for that stuff. Might be a good idea to set-up an AA forum? What do you think?

collie50

Hi,

Thanks for the explanation but I’m not sure if you read the link, it’s nothing to do with advertising and tries to move away from the whole AA thing. If people are to move away for the AA scenario they could perhaps be looking at alternatives: for example your excellent site of nondrinkersclub which has the correct idea that alcohol should not be an issue to having fun. I have never had serious trouble with alcohol but simply don’t like the affects of it. I don’t want to sit around all evening talking about how bad it is. The AA setup is that alcohol is the root of all problems which I believe is very negative.. However I do acknowledge that you did not wish for this forum to become a rehab spot as stated in my earlier post. So anyway, unfortunately it appears there is no AA alternative in Ireland, therefore I believe you may get or have many members who are or who have been in AA. Are they welcome?

Apologies for putting the thread in this spot as I believe you are doing very good work but to start up an AA forum would simply be a worlog of drink stories which I don’t think anyone here would want to read, especially not me.

So I think I’ll can leave it at that and keep up the good work.

NonDrinkersClub

Yeah - pretty much I don't wouldn't like the forum turning into a rehab spot either

That said, I think any AA member who has something positive to contribute is more than welcome to post here.

I didn't realise that the AA is a bit on the religious side?

CPT. SURF

NonDrinkersClub wrote: »

I didn't realise that the AA is a bit on the religious side?

A bit on the religious side? You must never have been to a meeting.

It seemed to be all about how alcoholics are powerless to the drink and how you must admit that only through GOD can you gain the strength necessary to quit. Not for me.

I quit drinking recently and if anything I feel more powerful than ever. I do not believe in God either. How is this possible????;)

NonDrinkersClub

I've never been to a meeting but that's probably cos I'm the furthest thing from an alcoholic I'm a non drinker for health reasons. I'm not a big believer in God either. I'd hate to be an alcoholic trying to help themselves and getting stuck with a bunch of religious nutters! I mean, it's all well and good if belief can help you through, but in our modern society, you'd think there'd be a few non-religious alternatives. Is there nothing else?

Karen_*

CPT. SURF wrote: »

A bit on the religious side? You must never have been to a meeting.

It seemed to be all about how alcoholics are powerless to the drink and how you must admit that only through GOD can you gain the strength necessary to quit. Not for me.

I quit drinking recently and if anything I feel more powerful than ever. I do not believe in God either. How is this possible????;)

They don't force God down your throat because not everyone in AA beleives in God. But most people believe in a higher power and your God can be whatever you beleive yourself. Even if that God is just willpower of the love and support of friends. Theres alot more than just ourselves gets us through the bad times.

CPT. SURF

Karen33 wrote: »

They don't force God down your throat because not everyone in AA beleives in God. But most people believe in a higher power and your God can be whatever you beleive yourself. Even if that God is just willpower of the love and support of friends. Theres alot more than just ourselves gets us through the bad times.

Why do you have to call the love and support of your friends "GOD"? That is a little strange no? What not just call it for what it is?

Why not have some faith in yourself and the world around you and stop trying to attribute things to some spooky God?

LaVidaLoca

http://www.a-1associates.com/aa/humanist2.htm

There's Rational Recovery as a secular alternative.

Karen_*

CPT. SURF wrote: »

Why do you have to call the love and support of your friends "GOD"? That is a little strange no? What not just call it for what it is?

Why not have some faith in yourself and the world around you and stop trying to attribute things to some spooky God?

Sorry I didn't mean friends were God. I meant we sometimes need support to get through things. For some people its friends, for others its a God they beleive in.

I don't beleive in God myself,

cue

CPT. SURF wrote: »

some spooky God?

Hey, c'mon now. Don't be mean. I like my spooky god. My spooky god likes you too

Richie860504

Yeah been to AA a couple of times. Not great. This higher power, No sorry I gave up drink for me, didn't get support doing it apart from few family members. Friends turned their backs as soon as I was done drinking, One was even trying to tell me I didn't have a problem. Higher power my arse. If there was a higher power, why didn't it prevent me from becoming an alcoholic? Why did it leave me with nothing? Why did it allow people to turn their backs when I needed support? If it can't do these things what's the point in believing. Just needed a rant.

Karen_*

So did you give up drinking all by yourself and with no support at all? Friends who turned their backs on you weren't friends at all really. Thats awful, hope nothing ever goes wrong for them and they never need anyone!

Richie860504

No. I had support off family. Who then got me into an alcohol addiction programme. But that was after years of relapses. I wouldn't hope their life gets messed up to be honest cos as I said 1 was trying to convince me I didn't have a problem which was probably just for his own benefit to justify his drinking.

anixela

Hi, good call with a non drinkers club, whatever it takes to stay sober if that's what you want.

I just wanted to state that i'm a new AA member been around just over 3 months, and i'm not finding it religious at all, when we talk about higher power it's whatever higher power keeps you sober, whether it's a loved one you've lost, the spirit of nature etc whatever you choose, if you choose religion as your higher power than that's your own choice, it's not judgemental. It's a belief that there is something greater than ourselves out there. I struggle and always have with religion and I didn't want it, I thought spirituality and religion were the same thing. But they're not. My belief so far is that there must be something watching out for me something bigger than me or i'd probably be dead by now. I look to the tide going in and out etc, mostly the spirit of nature it just gives me a connection that I find is the beginnings of spirituality for me. It's God as we understand him. You don't even have to call it god. I hope that's positive, that's all I know right now.

Good luck all xx

NonDrinkersClub wrote: »

Yeah - pretty much I don't wouldn't like the forum turning into a rehab spot either

That said, I think any AA member who has something positive to contribute is more than welcome to post here.

I didn't realise that the AA is a bit on the religious side?

Karen_*

Well done on being three months sober.;)

I think the vast majority would have a belief that there is something greater than ourselves and someone or something looking out for us. And if you hit your rock bottom well then its always worth looking at what works for very many people. Even if it doesn't immediately appeal:)

collie50

Ladies,

Please read the AA big book and tell me its not all about religion, come on...

Im not hear to completely distroy AA ,its not for me the bunch of wackos but I was just enquiring if their is any alternative to it. They hold a collection like in Church and finish with prayers and its not religious!!!

The big book states that if you are not a beliver now you will become one over time, I can get the page and quotes if you want!

Karen_*

Well have you found a better and more effective way than the bunch of wackos Collie? Not a very nice comment I must say seeing as though you obviously were asking for input from alcoholics in this thread and some of them would most likely be AA members. Don't ask if you can't have respect for your intended audience.

collie50

Hi Karen,

Sorry didnt mean to offend you, it was an off the cuff comment SORRY.

No I have not found an alternative for AA but am still sober.

100% honest if I was to sit in an AA meeting it would drive me to drink, and once again Im not trying to be hurtful but the self indulgence in AA is beyond believe. Its based on shame and guilt, that's how I read the steps. I could be wrong. But who am I to knock it.

However I do believe its a cult type organisation and anyone who speaks out against the cult should not be tolerated. I hope Im intitled to my opionion!

Col

Karen_*

Thanks for your reply.

Of course you're entitled to your opinion and I myself am not a fan of organisations who claim to be the only option towards either sobriety, one true churches, weightloss etc. I don't like being told how to think either.

I DO know though that AA works for a large amount of people and as long as they're getting sober and going on to a better life for them and their families well then thats brilliant. You can't knock that. And so AA is doing brilliant things in peoples lives. But its not for everyone. I would disagree that you absolutely HAVE to have religion to be in it. And as for your point on the collections - lots of organisations, charities etc have collections. AA aren't funded but are self supporting and they do have to pay the rent for the rooms they use. There aren't any paid memebers there or leaders. Unlike churches or indeed cults.

Its great that you're still sober. How are you doing it and how are you finding it? Well done. An uncle of mine quit drinking and he was a lost cause at one stage. He did it without AA so I am not in anyway saying its the only way to go.

cufroige

Hello there...
My name is cufroige and I am an...only kidding

Just some light hearted humour.

I'm 33 on my next birthday. I wouldn't say I have a problem with drink. My problem is with moderation & that extends also to food, talking ****e & laundry..

Seriously, I am sick of being the eejit who's 'great craic' at my own expense, I'm sick of the hangovers, the tiredness that follows those hangovers for days,
the downers that follow the tiredness & the disorganisation that is the result of all of the above. The bad skin, bloating, weight fluctuations, hangover food binges...the thirst, dehydration, glassy eyes.. I can go on & on

Of course, after all this passes eventually, what do I do? Eh, DRINK!

I get easily pissed, but I also have quite an enormous constitution, which means my drunkenness isn't even a brief thing... I prolong my embarrassment, and yes when I'm drunk I'm one of those 'honest' people..

I'm never aggressive but I let my big mouth flap on about what I think about this & that & what kinda contraception I use & that sometimes I have sexual tendencies that differ..

Without drink I'm not shy, I'm still funny, still confident.. So drink is merely something I partake in out of habit & conditioning..because it's something I have always done...

I am finished waking up with the consequences of drunk me.. It's just not doing me any favours whatsoever! I don't even like the taste of it anymore!

I won't be joining AA. It's not ruining my life or relationships or anything, just my liver, my skin, my figure & my dignity.

:eek::eek::eek:IT'S TIME TO GROW UP MRS!!:eek::eek::eek:

I will admit It's a little daunting when I think of the times I might feel tempted to drink just be around other drunk people (because let's face it, after the neighbors dog barking all night & ****ting in your lawn, drunk people come in a close second in terms of annoying)
there is also the matter of impulse that on a sunny day by the river or a rainy day in the country a pint bottle of bulmers or an irish coffee might whisper something about perfection in your ear...

I'm trying to decide what to do in terms of accountability & committment to making this decision without being 'sent for' should I cave in..

maybe I could start a blog...that would be fun..
I could call it
"No more sex in the city"
haha

Karen_*

I was talking to a barman the other day and he was saying that there's nothing to do if you don't drink. I've found the opposite. I find I've alot more freedom since I gave up drink. I can go to more places and bring the car and I'm always feeling well enough to do dance classes or go on walks etc etc. I've got a new lease of life and I wish I'd done it years ago. I'm loads happier too.

It's a great life. Maybe its not for everyone but it is for me. And there was me thinking life was boring and mundane. Well the pub and club life certainly was. And not to mention the feeling crap and guilty too. That sure wasn't much fun. Nor was it original.

A diary or a blog sounds like a great idea to charter your progress cufroige. Do it like an experiment and have the blog for three months or something thats not too daunting. Then weight up the pros and cons after the three months. Best of luck! You will not regret it!:D

cufroige

Thanks Karen..

I'm gonna do that.. I went off drink before for 6 months & I agree with you, it gives you so much more freedom. And you gain extra days in the week which would have been robbed by hangovers!

Yey for us!!!:D

danger mouse

All well said and done. but what of the people like me who have for years been part of the irish dance music scene involving taking drugs and drinking for days on end..All im left with now after dropping the partying is a lonely apartment and a bottle of jack daniels most nights im not working the next day.

Karen_*

Well that's the choice you've made Dangermouse

danger mouse

Karen_* wrote: »

Well that's the choice you've made Dangermouse

Well tbh we all make stupid choices my impulse to get drunk on my nights of from work are so powerful i cant stop it. It's second nature at this stage. fair play to those who are able to stop drinking id love to give up drinking but i really dont know what i could replace it with at the moment. Hard luck on my part.

Karen_*

Well would you be willing to see a counsellor or go to a support group? Its doesn't just have to be hard luck you.

Compulsions are very hard to overcome but it can be done. There is more to life and you deserve to have more in your life. PM me if you'd like me to point you in the direction of some help:)