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    #32
    Cadyboo
    Registered Users Posts: 1,302 ✭✭✭Cadyboo


    snyper wrote: »
    For months i thought "Desparate Housewives" was called STFU


    Because thats all i heard from her anytime i moved, blinked or pass wind while it was on.

    Ha ha, she was dead right too!!! :D:D


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    #33
    coffee_cake
    Registered Users Posts: 81,310 CMod ✭✭✭✭coffee_cake


    lisaloo wrote: »
    i left earlier.told him id be back later on but i wont. just gonna leve him to it now.

    tbh i doubt he'd notice if you arent back this evening


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    #34
    Rob_l
    Registered Users Posts: 2,905 ✭✭✭Rob_l


    Silverfish wrote: »
    And if he was a rational sane person he would accept it if told him she didn't want to.

    The op didn't say this
    Silverfish wrote: »
    It doesn't matter who owns the house, its still her home, if she contributes towards his mortgage or whatever.
    She never said she does this either
    Silverfish wrote: »
    No reason for it whatsoever, especially since she's interested in football as well.
    its a boys night! he wants to have a boys night! he does not want his girlfriend hanging over his shoulder, whatever you may think people act differently when in the company of their partners and tonight he wants to ahve a laugh and watch the game with the boys


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    #35
    Gillo
    Registered Users Posts: 5,566 ✭✭✭Gillo


    Rob_l wrote: »
    its a boys night! he wants to have a boys night! he does not want his girlfriend hanging over his shoulder, whatever you may think people act differently when in the company of their partners and tonight he wants to ahve a laugh and watch the game with the boys

    Yeah, but he could have handled it a lot better than what the op said. No way I'd tell the misses to get out cos I want to watch the footie (and now I wouldn't leave a post-it on the iron) TBH I'd prefer to watch fottie in a pub as there is generally a better atmosphere.


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    #36
    lisaloo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 219 ✭✭lisaloo


    feck it


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    #37
    Sherifu
    Registered Users Posts: 17,727 ✭✭✭✭Sherifu


    lisaloo wrote: »
    feck it
    What happened?


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    #38
    The Sweeper
    Registered Users Posts: 10,658 ✭✭✭✭The Sweeper


    "There is football on the television and I want to watch it with my friends." <-- not the issue.

    "...so get out." <-- the issue.

    I don't think it's remotely unreasonable to be annoyed by the second part. Being annoyed by the first part would be silly.


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    #39
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Minesajackdaniels wrote: »
    "There is football on the television and I want to watch it with my friends." <-- not the issue.

    "...so get out." <-- the issue.

    I don't think it's remotely unreasonable to be annoyed by the second part. Being annoyed by the first part would be silly.

    Unless it clashed with Desperate Housewives.


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    #40
    johnnyskeleton
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators, Politics Moderators Posts: 14,503 Mod ✭✭✭✭johnnyskeleton


    Silverfish wrote: »
    And if he was a rational sane person he would accept it if told him she didn't want to.

    It doesn't matter who owns the house, its still her home, if she contributes towards his mortgage or whatever.

    I think you're reading entirely too much into her post that isn't there. What if, on the other hand, they both had a house each, and she pressured him into them both moving into his house and she rents out hers? What if he had the house from before going out with her, and find the relationship moving too fast etc? She called it "his" house which is probably a good indication of how she views the house.


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    #41
    Silverfish
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,696 Mod ✭✭✭✭Silverfish


    johnnyskeleton wrote: »
    I think you're reading entirely too much into her post that isn't there. What if, on the other hand, they both had a house each, and she pressured him into them both moving into his house and she rents out hers? What if he had the house from before going out with her, and find the relationship moving too fast etc? She called it "his" house which is probably a good indication of how she views the house.

    What if nothing.

    She lives there, its her home. He can either ask her to move out permanently, or accept she lives there. If he accepts she lives there, he can't ask her to get out so he can watch a football match.

    If he's allowed her to move in, he can't just pick and choose when he wants her there.


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    #42
    Pj!
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,783 ✭✭✭Pj!


    In fairness, if a guy came on here saying he got kicked out of the house because his OH was having a girls night in, what sympathy would he get?

    It was unfair though, and she'll have to deal with it without going overboard.


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    #43
    Ginny
    Hosted Moderators Posts: 13,425 ✭✭✭✭Ginny


    Why does she have to leave the house though?
    There's been girls nights in/boys nights in with my ex and there is no way in hell we'd ask the OH to "get out". Why can't she stay in the house and they just watch the footie in a seperate room.
    There's also quite a difference in being told to keep quiet while some is watching a program they like while you're still there to telling you to get out so they can watch the football.

    If he's so determined on a boys night, how about a single mates gaff, or the pub, I'd bet of the OP was just the boyfriends room-mate rather then OH he'd think twice about asking them to leave.


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    #44
    The Sweeper
    Registered Users Posts: 10,658 ✭✭✭✭The Sweeper


    Forky wrote: »
    In fairness, if a guy came on here saying he got kicked out of the house because his OH was having a girls night in, what sympathy would he get?

    I'd hope he'd get plenty of sympathy, because it's a dog rotten thing to do to someone to throw them out of their own home because you want to do something recreational in it.


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    #45
    Wibbs
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 60,150 Mod ✭✭✭✭Wibbs


    ^^ agreed well out of order for anyone, never mind gender.

    Rejoice in the awareness of feeling stupid, for that’s how you end up learning new things. If you’re not aware you’re stupid, you probably are.



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    #46
    GuanYin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 15,552 ✭✭✭✭GuanYin


    I don't think this is a tit for tat kinda situation and staying away isn't going to help. I'd sit down and have a chat because if what he said is actually "leave my house while I watch soccer" or any variation, you don't want to be in that relationship.

    I broke up with someone recently for being way too clingy, and maybe thats it, maybe he feels you spend too much time together. I had loooong chats with my partner where I explained that wanting to do things apart didn't mean I cared for them any less. Being apart is important but there is a difference between you not giving him his own time and him ejecting you from your home for a game of soccer.

    If I didn't like soccer (and I do) I'd simply call some friends over and hang out with them in another room if I wanted to stay (personally I would probably go out though).

    What you need to do is figure out how he justifies that and (maybe) set up some boundies in your relationship, cos it doesn't sound like you have any.


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    #47
    SarahSassy
    Registered Users Posts: 3,145 ✭✭✭SarahSassy


    Rob_l wrote: »
    He has a point in fairness


    Sod back off to BGRH :(


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    #48
    Abi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    No way would I have left the house.

    This approach might seem a little sterile :o but I've never had a girls night in, and hes never had a lads night in. If we want to hang out with friends we take it out to the pub / restaurant or whatever rather than disrupt the home.

    It is unreasonable imo to ask one or the other to leave the house. What if you don't feel like going out?


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    #49
    The Sweeper
    Registered Users Posts: 10,658 ✭✭✭✭The Sweeper


    SarahSassy wrote: »
    Sod back off to BGRH :(

    Sarah don't feed the trolls.


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    #50
    lisaloo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 219 ✭✭lisaloo


    only 1 friend showed up to watch the match last night, the friend we are both friends with.


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    #51
    heavyheart
    Closed Accounts Posts: 257 ✭✭heavyheart


    lisaloo wrote: »
    only 1 friend showed up to watch the match last night, the friend we are both friends with.

    In future suggest to him he tells you in advance if he is planning such a night then you can organize a wine night with a old buddy for a catch up or something ...both of ye wins !


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    #52
    Sherifu
    Registered Users Posts: 17,727 ✭✭✭✭Sherifu


    lisaloo wrote: »
    only 1 friend showed up to watch the match last night, the friend we are both friends with.
    :D He was wrong to tell you to leave. If he politely asked you to be gone with plenty of notice, that would be ok. But I don't know all the details so I can't really say.


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    #53
    undecided
    Registered Users Posts: 679 ✭✭✭undecided


    WTF OP thats way out of order!

    Fair enough he wants a lads night-but but he could just ask you to give him space- not have to leave the house!

    myself and my partner regularly have friend over.. If I have a few girls he leaves us to it and vice versa... we dont even ask each other..

    I would never leave the house for such a thing and wouldnt expect anyone to either!


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    #54
    jesus_thats_gre
    Registered Users Posts: 17,441 ✭✭✭✭jesus_thats_gre


    Minesajackdaniels wrote: »
    "There is football on the television and I want to watch it with my friends." <-- not the issue.

    "...so get out." <-- the issue.

    I don't think it's remotely unreasonable to be annoyed by the second part. Being annoyed by the first part would be silly.

    Assuming he did actually say "so get out"...

    Now, if he did, he deserves to never get head for the rest of his retarded life.

    Saying that, is it possible that he suggested she do something with her mates instead of being couped up in the next room sulking? Not exactly the best way of putting it but you get my point I am sure..


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    #55
    The Sweeper
    Registered Users Posts: 10,658 ✭✭✭✭The Sweeper


    I do indeed. It is one thing to say "Listen I'm having the lads over for football, any chance you could go out with the girls" - as long as he accepts that "No, there isn't" is a reasonable response. It is another thing to say "I'm having the lads over for football and I don't want you to be here". But the OP is the only person who can qualify exactly what he said.


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    #56
    Jules
    Registered Users Posts: 6,756 ✭✭✭Jules


    What would of been the issue of her watching the footie as well? I do think the tit for tat will just end in tears. Let him know your were upset with the how the situation went and then next time it happens you will stick a poker up his nose.


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    #57
    The Sweeper
    Registered Users Posts: 10,658 ✭✭✭✭The Sweeper


    Jules I reckon it's easy to think "Football isn't only the passion of blokes, I can watch it too!" and that's fine, but notwithstanding that, in healthy relationships sometimes you want a bit of space to do things with your blokey mates.

    Bloke wants to watch footie with his blokey mates. That's not a problem. He'd rather do it without his missus - that's also really not a problem. (Blokes have funny reasons for things, and sometimes missuses are also a bit funny. For instance, perhaps all his mates like to shout 'c*nt' at the television a lot when footie is on, and the missus would crack it if they did that. Subsequently he wants to watch footie with his mates without his missus so they can all call the referee a c*nt to their hearts' content. Fine.)

    It's okay to want some time to yourself with your friends without your partner. It's not okay to be a prick about it. As others have said, he should go out and watch football with the boys somewhere else.

    Sting though it might, the OP may need to be a bit flexible about her other half wanting to do things without her, but at the same time recognise the line between that and him actively excluding her and being an arse.

    Hey - if relationships were easy there'd be no divorce.


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    #58
    amylou
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6 ✭amylou


    ha! Im a day late but a bit of subtle revenge is needed. for the second round game tell him he can watch it at home but have the NTL cut off that morn - ha it'll be worth the fifty quid to get it reconnected. if that doesnt work - leave something smouldering in the oven that ignites just as the match kicks off... bloody smoke alarms! a few hidden alarm clocks going off too really drive him spare.

    Then - kick him out the next night( before the male has time to plan revenge - approx 2 weeks!!) so you can watch the news with your friends- medicene always tastes nastier when you have to take it yourself!!!!


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    #59
    jesus_thats_gre
    Registered Users Posts: 17,441 ✭✭✭✭jesus_thats_gre


    wonder where my bunny has got to...


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