Podge and Rodge Sayings.....

dvega

He has rubber-lined pockets so he can steal soup
He thinks manual labour is a Spanish musician
As funny as a burning orphanage
He's so camp, he $hites tent pegs
I'm as sick as a plane to Lourdes
I feel like a boiled $h1te (hungover)
(when leaving) I'm off like a debs dress
She had a face on her that would drive rats from a barn
As busy as the dalkey dole office
Sweatin' like a paedophile in a Barney suit
As tight as a nun's kn1ckers
I'm so h0rny I'd get up on the crack of dawn
I'd crawl a million miles across broken glass to kiss the exhaust of
the van that took her dirty kn1ckers to the laundry.
Up and down like a hoor's kn1ckers
No show pony but would do for a ride around the house
Did your mother find out who your father is yet?
What would ye expect from a pig but a grunt
I left her with a face like a painters radio
A m1ckey the size of a double-value can of Right Guard
Jay$us, she could breastfeed a crèche
As fit as a butcher's dog
She ' s got more chins than a Chinese phone book
Not even the tide would take her out
Mother Teresa wouldn 't kiss her
Daz wouldn't shift her
Des Kelly wouldn't lay her
A sniper wouldn't take her out
Jay$us, ya wouldn't ride her into battle
If I'd a bag of bruised w1llies I wouldn't give her one
She has a face on her like a bulldog that's just licked p1ss off a nettle
She wouldn't get a kick in a stampede
She had a f@nny like a badly packed kebab
If I'd a garden full of m1ckeys I wouldn't let her look over the wall