Irish Sayings!! Please Add your favourites...

dcukhunter

Howz she cuttin

Ya cudnt hit a cows arse with a shovel

Fcuk ya, ya fcuking fcuk fcuk. ( To a taxi driver that wouldn't bring us home after a night out)

and one of my favs

Tis a brave man that will piss inta the wind. (or stupid depends where ur standing.

newmills

Go On

newmills

Go On

Fierce

Deadly

She'd ride like a new bike

(Cr*p) Must go and tip the cart

He's that tight he wouldn't give a door a bang

He's as tight as two coats of paint

Ask me hole

You've a head on you like the back of my bag

It's a great country

It'll be a great country when they get the roof on her

Hoagy

Usually referring to apprentices -

'The best part of that fella ran down his mother's leg'

Sam Kade

As tight as a ducks arse.

As tight as a frogs hole. (and a frogs hole is water tight)

I'll see you bye and bye.

Goodmorrow.

I think I'll hit the hay.

A relation of mine would say either of the following if you told him some news : you could be half right or you could be three quarters right or you could be two thirds right. (theres no way you could be fully right)

manster

She'd suck the chrome off a ball hitch

admiralofthefleet

stick it up yer brenda/swiss

fillmore jive

as sick as a small hospital?

It BeeMee

"That's some day out there" - It's snowing

"That's some day out there" - It's pouring rain

"That's some day out there" - The sun is splitting the stones





Obviously context is all-important.....

Fey!

Meanness/Dislike

"He wouldn't piss on ya if ya were burnin'"


Hunger

"I'd eat a farmers arse through a hole in a hedge"
"I'd eat the crotch off a low flying duck"
"I'd eat the hind leg off the lamb of God runnin' backways away from me"


Never Satisfied

"If all that grass was gold she'd want silver"


Hangover

"There's a little man in my head doing the dance of the seven snotty orphans"


Guy calls in sick to work...

"How sick are ye?" "I'm in bed with me sister!"

dh0661

Sam Kade wrote: »

As tight as a ducks arse.
As tight as a frogs hole. (and a frogs hole is water tight)

I would have presumed that a ducks arse is also watertight.

smashling

I'm so hungry I'd eat the crotch of a low flying emu

I'm so hungry I'd eat the scabs off a tinkers fanny through the spokes of a bicycle wheel.

I'm so hungry I'd eat a scabby baby between two p*ss stained mattresses

I'm so tired I'd sleep on the back of a galloping hedgehog

I'd crawl backwards through nettles to w*nk in her shadow

Xavi6

smashling wrote: »

I'd crawl backwards through nettles to w*nk in her shadow

ROFL! Love it.

TradLad

Hoagy wrote: »

Usually referring to apprentices -

'The best part of that fella ran down his mother's leg'

Class!!!! Heard it years ago!! Favourite so far!!!

danh789

for have sex:
Give her the beef injection

or

throw a mix into her

and for a one night stand:
dump the load but dont sign the docket

It BeeMee

"He could milk a goat standing up"

Frelance

on hoping to find a good time girl.

hopefully there's some heffers with their tales up.



your arse in a bambox.. (not to sure about what that means tbh)



jesus, i wouldn't piss on her if she was on fire

Look at the chest potatoes on that!

danh789

great job for a country job

lovely hurlin'

on a loose woman:
it would be like throwing a sausage down o'connell street

bm365

in and out like a fiddlers elbow

fitz0

On an ugly/strange-looking person

S/he's a rare lookin c*nt.

Ya Blaack baaastard! - colloquial term referring to protestants
Black as yer boot - same as above

He's an ohjus whuar - not a very nice person
He's some c*nt - A bad person

chin_grin

I'm sure it's been mentioned before (sorry if this is a duplicate)....

For a lazy person:

"What did your last maid die of......"

Or for the one where you don't really give a darn what the person is saying...

"well, big shwing on the spit...."

Granny used to use them. Unsure if they're just local to Tipp or she made 'em up.

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

Lizard Queen

Somebody whos ugly
she wouldn't get her hole of a polo
cudnt score on a football pitch

A girl whos a slut
her name is flora cause she spreads like butter

A mad person
Bleedin tulip
she lakes

Classics
Sweet mary magdelen and the 7 shaven headed lepers
Christ on a bike

rgiller

A skinny girl:

There's more meat in a rat's ****e


After a night out on Guiness you get a daggin' the next day.

(For those who don't know, a dagging is a procedure preformed on sheep where the ring of matted wool around their bumhole is shaved.)

mkdon05

when someone is trying to make a point in an argument and says " IF that happens etc...

You say " IF me aunt had balls she'd be me uncle"

martinm167

'GobSh!te'
classic

hippychippy

'Divil a bit'

'A face on her like a slapped arse'

'I will in me hole'

'Stall the digger'

'Is it yourself that's in it?'

'Were ya ever up a downpipe?'

'Were ya ever in a barrell with a goat?'

'Up ya boya'

'Up she flew and the cock flattened her'

'Right she said and she never wrote'

'Will ya have a cup of tae?(scald)'

'Get outa that garden'

'I've seen more meat on good friday'

'Sickens me tits'

'Bite me bollix'

'I wouldn't get up on her to get over a wall'

'He'd get up on a cracked plate'

'That lad is two ends of a prick'

'She aint no oil painting'

'Will ya go way an ****e'

'For the love of ****'

Stephen90

G'way

Will you g'way ya big feckin girls blouse

Whisht

Lovely hurlin

Ye bleedin amadán

Ya feckin ludramálin

Awh me ****in stones

I will in me sack/hole

That fella's so mean he wouldnt pay attention

I wouldnt ride yer one if she had pedals and a frame

Jaysis lads I wouldnt be long about givin' yer one the aul one two Uniflu wha?

When your told a piece of information:
'I see - said the blind man. Who couldnt se a'tall.'

A favourite of mine which was recently pointed out to me by a mate is the absolute abuse of the word Again by muck savages down here in Wexford. It takes on a whole new meaning:

'Jaysis now again ya get down there, pop in n out, and again yer back up here sher jaysis it'd be near half six'

Love it,
crackin thread.

martinm167

for being drunk:
arseholed
balubas (from the tribe in the congo who killed irish soldiers in the 60's!)
banjaxed
Bollixed
buckled
fluethered
mangled
langers
locked
lushed
Paralytic
pished
Plastered
Scuttered
steamboats
twisted
stocius

the list goes on.................

Mackman

Sam Kade wrote: »

It would freeze the balls off a brass monkey.

I heard a story about the origins of this, probably not true, but sure here it is anyway:

Back in the times of pirates and sailing the 7 seas etc., a brass monkey was a metal plate with indentations in it to hold canon balls. They would be stacked in a pyramid fashion. And when it was really cold, as in near the antarctic or something, the "brass monkey" would shrink (as we all know metal shrinks when cooled) and the canon balls would pop out of the indentations and fall off, hence the term "Freeze the balls of a brass monkey".

Anyway, back to funny sayings, this one probably aint Irish but sur what the hell:
Referring to two intellectually challenged people:
"If they had a braincell between them they're heads would be lob-sided"
:pac: