The "wrong hole" girl... and other rumours which turned out to be false

DubArk

I remember the time a guy I went to school with was flying to America with his family and as the plane had just taking off heading to the States; his little brother decided to stick a peanut in his ear….:eek::eek:

As the plane got higher and higher into the stratosphere the pressure became stronger and stronger on the said peanut and ear. He ended up reeling around the aisles in agony screaming for some one to remove the bloody peanut.

The air hostesses tried everywhere to help him!! They massaged the ear but to no avail, they tried pins to see if that would help but they just couldn’t keep him still, he just kept freaking out, even turning the plane around was considered.
But then one hostess thinking quick on her feet, ran down to the kitchen galley, grabbing a plain bar of Cadburys chocolate and placing it in a jug, then in the microwaving, till it melted. Telling everybody to stand back she poured it straight into his ear…. And it came out a TREAT!

Pj!

Good god!

How bad was that?!

fitz0

Overflow wrote: »

In a housing estate where i used to live many years ago there was this notorious crazy family, they were all nuts, especially the son and the mother. Well one day the son let loads of the lads from around the estate into his gaff for some reason. They discovered a ton naked paintings that the mother did of her two daughters. Later that day i came home only to see naked pictures of the two daughter strung up on lamp posts and stuck in bushes all around the estate. Shocking but true!

Were they good looking?

Sherifu

milmo wrote: »

A friend of a friend allegedly had a romantic encounter with a young lady who asked that he take her up the ass.

When he withdrew there was a small piece of sweetcorn stuck in his japs eye:eek:

From there on he was was known as "corn on the knob".


Allegedly.

Allegedly...

Steve_o

Overflow wrote: »

In a housing estate where i used to live many years ago there was this notorious crazy family, they were all nuts, especially the son and the mother. Well one day the son let loads of the lads from around the estate into his gaff for some reason. They discovered a ton naked paintings that the mother did of her two daughters. Later that day i came home only to see naked pictures of the two daughter strung up on lamp posts and stuck in bushes all around the estate. Shocking but true!

Pics or gtfo...

Capt'n Midnight

tribulus wrote: »

Must be lots of scumbags using junkfood wrappers for condoms.

It was Mars bar wrappers where I am and of course the joke was " ye didn't use the kingsize one, aaaaaaaaahhhahaha".

There was also a guy called Sock supposedly for the same idea, though I'd believe mars and crisp wrappers before that.

I've heard of cling film.

fitz0

A lad at college suggested jokingly a funsize smarties tube...

Needless to say he got some slagging

brianthebard

How many women supposedly eat sweetcorn according to these stories?

jefreywithonef

This is apparently true and I don't really doubt it. During P.E. in secondary school, a lad randomly whips out his pecker and starts **** while everyone stares on in shock.

HouseHippo

Oooo there was a guy in my bf's school who used to stand on the corridor and **** at other lads coming out of class

zuroph

or guy on bus to concert in dublin falls asleep, guy beside him takes his c0ck out and starts **** him off, when he get hard the guy shouts "look at this lads, he's gay!!"

HouseHippo

I heard that Wrong hole one about a guy named Chris, he fingered a girl in the "piss hole" and everyone called him pissy chrissy

This one had me looking at my muff for a few mins puzzled at how a finger would fit up that hole

A few weeks later those lads who told me the story started a rumour about me and I was like aha!

brianthebard

what was the rumour? And did you ever find the way into the piss hole?

HouseHippo

brianthebard wrote: »

what was the rumour? And did you ever find the way into the piss hole?

I never found a way in, It looked like it hurt and I have a very low pain threshold.

I suppose maybe If i spent a little less time on boards and a little more time inspecting my vagina I would have found one


Something about me screwing 3 other girls in a pool hall toilet....Unfortunately not true, I bet I would have sounded like a stud

brianthebard

I'm sure boards could have people willing to find a way in for you...
Thats a pretty impressive rumour, did you have a reputation for multiple lesbian sex before that???

HouseHippo

Is there a forum for that, if not there should be


Nope not at all....To think I scored all those chicks and I ndidn even have to buy em flowers dont ya just love rumours

brianthebard

eh just pm me for more details....

Yeah you must be some fanny fiend to have pulled 3 girls!

HouseHippo

I am indeed I love me fanny I do

brianthebard

fantastic stuff.

Vertakill

SetantaL wrote: »

Anyway, here's a most crazy story that happened to a mate of mine from Limerick in the last few weeks- she was on a hen in Amsterdam and was scoring this Adonis of a chap, she was aplogising to the girls for being with him at a hen but they were like- he's gorgwous, go for it. At the end of the night after she had agreed to go home with him, she had a change of heart and decided she couldn't leave the girls on a hen, he got a bit upset and that convinced her that her instincts were right so she told him to take a hike.
Anyway, she arrives back in Ireland and starts getting a rash about her mouth, thinks it herpes or the like and off to the doctor. He has a look, pulls her aside as starts questioning her about who she has been with recently. Turns out she's a bacteriall infection of a particular strain that feasts on dead flesh and can only be transfered to living flesh by close contact with the dead.
The doctor has to report it to the cops, they get in touch with Interpol and turns out the guy is a serial killer has three dead young ones in his apartment that he's been belting into for a while.
She was THIS close to going home with the guy. Unreal.

Heard this exact same story in Dublin from a mate who heard it from a female co-worker who'd just came back from holidays. Sounded like complete bull**** the first time I heard it too!

Variation I heard was Guy/Girl hit it off in a club but Girl refused to go back to Guy's room as she's out with the girls. Says the next night will be her last night on holiday and she'd look out for him. Doesn't manage to find him next night. Flies home - Boil/rash grows around her mouth ....you know the rest..

steo27

QUEEN still looking for the p**** that killed FREDDIE

Saint_Mel

tribulus wrote: »

Must be lots of scumbags using junkfood wrappers for condoms.

It was Mars bar wrappers where I am and of course the joke was " ye didn't use the kingsize one, aaaaaaaaahhhahaha".

There was also a guy called Sock supposedly for the same idea, though I'd believe mars and crisp wrappers before that.

Good few years ago when I was in college, the story goes that a student was seeing one of our lecturers ... they were coming home from the nite club one weekend and a fit of passion took over at the back of the shopping centre ... not being prepared for an occurance like this, the guy looks around and see's a Dunnes bag blowing in the wind ... and I'm sure you can guess the rest of the story from that.

The bit about the student seeing the lecturer is true but how much of the rest is I dont know, but for a good month or so there was quips made about shopping bags during her lecture and she would always go bright red without saying anything!