boot camps?

eirelad

hi im new on the forum and i am wondering does anyone know if there are any boot camps in the north east or in rest of ireland as a friends 15 year old son is out of control and she is hoping that this might help him get his act together.

thanks in advance

ps: posted this is another section too as i never saw parenting section sorry

Kildrought

Consider if he would join the local scout group?

It's not the US-Style Boot camps that we see on the TV, but almost all of the activities they do on those progammes are done in scouts; and teens gain a huge amount of self-confidence and skills from it.

luckat

She'd be better off to go to his school and ask them to refer him for counselling - there's a very good State system, which has a good record for helping people sort themselves out.

Also, a book I've mentioned here before, The Power of Positive Parenting by Glenn Latham, has a great section on teenagers. Not that I'd expect any desperate parent to do it by herself.

sunnyjim

Want an honest opinion?

Let him do the Junior Cert, and then leave school for a trade, job whatever.

Personally, I think the 2 or 3 years in school after the JC can be 2 or 3 years where troublesome lads have too much free time and few responsibilities. I might be jumping the gun here, but is he bad in a way as in he probably won't aim high, wont do well, or might wind up in trouble in the next few years? Going on to working or a trade means time is spent working, not dossing.

Nevyn

I really don't like the relgious ethos underpinning that postive parenting book personally.

as far as I know we dont' have those types of boot camps, why is it she can't enforce a program of tough love at home ?

luckat

I don't care for the religious ethos much myself - but the transactions in the book work.

b3t4

My thoughts would be similar to Thaedydal's.

A boot camp isn't much use if the child has to return to the exact same environment after it. The parent(s) can't expect the child to change if their behaviour at home isn't changing.

It's very easy to point the finger at the child but that's all he is, a child who needs some guidance from an adult in his life.

A.

littlebitdull

I dont know of any such camp in Ireland. I can totally empatise with her problem, and it would seem like a great solution to hand over the child to someone else for a while, someone who will "sort him out".

But ... can you imagine how he would feel? He is going through a difficult time - he is a teenager - remember how hard that was - its tough!! So he is having a hard time, he is acting up, perhaps he has got in with the wrong crowd - easy to do!

So what does his loving parents do to help him?? Ship him off to a boot camp.....

So while I - who have teenagers - can understand why they would think this is a good solution ... I doubt he will feel that way. Which could only make matters worse in the long run.

There are parenting courses designed for parents of teenagers - suport systems available here. Tell them to talk to their GP first step, and ask for a list of possible help available to them.

Best of luck.

snowdaze

HSE run Fás Le Chéile courses on various parenting related topics including rearing teenagers

Also, your local Family Life Centre may be able to help out - many courses on offer there too!