What to do next.....???

Little Miss!

Morning all!

Hope i'm posting in the right place, but basically just looking for some advice. So here goes.... working full-time, own my own place (ok shoe-box sized apartment but mine!! oh and the generous people at AIB!!) Was studying part-time up until end of may (finished for summer), was studying management and to be quite honest after 1 year of it, i reckon that could be enough!

My question is, where do i go now, if i'm honest i'm stuck in a dead-end job, with no prospects. Been here for almost 3 years, like the job i do but not too keen on a few people i work with, but i guess i stay here cos i've got a mortgage now and bills to pay so i feel like i've no other choice.

I've often thought of packing it all in and moving to oz but i figure if i can't make myself happy here, what hope have i of doing it anywhere else. I'm really just trying to figure out what life is actually all about, cos really mine isn't really doing it for me at the moment! I basically get up, go to work, go home, go to bed and basically do the same the next day. I live and work miles away from my family and friends and i guess i'm just a bit fed up with things.

Sorry all for the long drawn out post but i guess it kinda turned into a mini-rant! I know there's a lot worse off than me and i am very grateful for what i do have but i guess i'm just a little lost at the minute and would love to hear from anyone in the same position or anyone that could give some advice on how i make my life better!

Thanks Ladies (and Lad's (of course) of the Ladies Lounge!!)

John Mason

exact same position (well expect for the apartment, i have a ramshackle house instead).

i have already done the oz thing, so thats out for.

i guess it depends how old you are.

i am just keeping my head down and waiting for the next 20 years to pass when i have my mortgage paid off, i am going to head out to borneo and peru etc, for about a year.

thats what is keep me going

Little Miss!

Hey irishbird looks like we're in the same boat!! Life can be just a little boring at time i guess. I'm 27 now but feeling like a 57 year old! Don't really have much of a life at the minute, like i said i live miles away from my friends and family so spend most evenings in front of the tv which is a little depressing when the evenings are getting good.

I guess i'm just a bit lonely at the moment, i used to have a great social life but now i've none-what-so-ever and i guess it's just hard to deal with.

John Mason

well, get out of the apartment then and do something.

go to the gym or get a hobbie, volunteer at a dogs home

there is loads to out there. Look at activelink.ie or nixer.ie and find a group looking for volunteers.

Join the zoo and help out there - so much to do, so little time.

As for family and friends, all my family and friends are about 30 miles away from me

Dragan

Simple and basic question for you....career wise, what do you want to do? Do you have anything that you would really lilke to suceed at in any given area? If so how do you go about doing it?

You need to stop looking at your current position as a trap and start looking at it as a platform. You have a place to live, a wage and time.

So with the first two offering some sercurity, what does the second allow you to acheive?

Clare Bear

I said recently to my brother who also feels "stuck" (he's a farmer, which pretty much means that's his life mapped out for him)....that if you can't move/head to Oz etc then you have to make your life as it is better. Think of things that would make you happy, get out there and meet new people, make new friends, get new hobbies. Sitting in front of the TV every evening isn't good for anyone and it's doing you no favours. Hope you take something from what people are saying here and make the most of what you have, only you can make your life better And heading off to Oz isn't always the answer, most people have to come back at some stage. It isn't the answer to all your problems as many people seem to think it is (Obviously everyone should travel but it shouldn't be used as an excuse to run away) Hope you feel better, it's summer, the weather is nice (sometimes!), get out there and enjoy it

jellie

im kind of in a similar position, but without the house!

just broke up with my bf, & while my whole life wasnt about him, he was certainly a huge part of it. now i suddenly have all this free time. but i had it before, it just didnt bother me, whereas now i NOTICE it more because im trying to be busy or something.

most days are work, followed by home to tv/internet, maybe go for a walk. weekends - might go out friday or saturday evening, maybe go shopping or something during the day on saturday, but generally not very exciting. i used to enjoy these weekends because it was only every 2nd weekend or so, because id often spend weekends with him (where i wasnt allowed go near any shops!!). but my weekends just seem wide open now. i cant rely on friends ALL the time, they have their own lives too, which are hugely taken up by bfs (i noticed this even when i had a bf, some of these girls cant go anywhere without the bf & when hes not there theyre texting him constantly).

so anyway, i feel like im kind of stuck in a rut or something. i have all these ideas of things i could do, but if i choose 1 it rules another out completely & im just a bit stuck.

one option im thinking of is travelling (the usual answer to everything!). BUT i dont think im brave enough to go alone. ive been saving for a car, so i could keep this money for travelling & keep saving till about sept/oct & then head off. but i dont think i could go alone. i had been supposed to go with my ex when he finished college but thats gone now!

another option is to continue with the car plan. i had intended to buy a car soon (i have nearly enough now) & learn to drive. so of course the learning part would take up a good bit of time (and money) & give me something new to do. & then continue my life as it has been going..

but these are 2 totally different options. most people will probably go "travel! travel!" but i REALLY wouldnt go alone, im just not that kind of person. i have a friend who might be interested but shes all over the place, dunno how long i wanna wait for her decision.

i just want to get happy in my life on my own again. i need to get back to who i am because i kind of feel ive lost it or something.

how do you become content with your life?!

ibh

Little Miss! wrote: »

Morning all!

Hope i'm posting in the right place, but basically just looking for some advice. So here goes.... working full-time, own my own place (ok shoe-box sized apartment but mine!! oh and the generous people at AIB!!) Was studying part-time up until end of may (finished for summer), was studying management and to be quite honest after 1 year of it, i reckon that could be enough!

My question is, where do i go now, if i'm honest i'm stuck in a dead-end job, with no prospects. Been here for almost 3 years, like the job i do but not too keen on a few people i work with, but i guess i stay here cos i've got a mortgage now and bills to pay so i feel like i've no other choice.

I've often thought of packing it all in and moving to oz but i figure if i can't make myself happy here, what hope have i of doing it anywhere else. I'm really just trying to figure out what life is actually all about, cos really mine isn't really doing it for me at the moment! I basically get up, go to work, go home, go to bed and basically do the same the next day. I live and work miles away from my family and friends and i guess i'm just a bit fed up with things.

Sorry all for the long drawn out post but i guess it kinda turned into a mini-rant! I know there's a lot worse off than me and i am very grateful for what i do have but i guess i'm just a little lost at the minute and would love to hear from anyone in the same position or anyone that could give some advice on how i make my life better!

Thanks Ladies (and Lad's (of course) of the Ladies Lounge!!)

sar84 wrote: »

im kind of in a similar position, but without the house!

just broke up with my bf, & while my whole life wasnt about him, he was certainly a huge part of it. now i suddenly have all this free time. but i had it before, it just didnt bother me, whereas now i NOTICE it more because im trying to be busy or something.

most days are work, followed by home to tv/internet, maybe go for a walk. weekends - might go out friday or saturday evening, maybe go shopping or something during the day on saturday, but generally not very exciting. i used to enjoy these weekends because it was only every 2nd weekend or so, because id often spend weekends with him (where i wasnt allowed go near any shops!!). but my weekends just seem wide open now. i cant rely on friends ALL the time, they have their own lives too, which are hugely taken up by bfs (i noticed this even when i had a bf, some of these girls cant go anywhere without the bf & when hes not there theyre texting him constantly).

so anyway, i feel like im kind of stuck in a rut or something. i have all these ideas of things i could do, but if i choose 1 it rules another out completely & im just a bit stuck.

one option im thinking of is travelling (the usual answer to everything!). BUT i dont think im brave enough to go alone. ive been saving for a car, so i could keep this money for travelling & keep saving till about sept/oct & then head off. but i dont think i could go alone. i had been supposed to go with my ex when he finished college but thats gone now!

another option is to continue with the car plan. i had intended to buy a car soon (i have nearly enough now) & learn to drive. so of course the learning part would take up a good bit of time (and money) & give me something new to do. & then continue my life as it has been going..

but these are 2 totally different options. most people will probably go "travel! travel!" but i REALLY wouldnt go alone, im just not that kind of person. i have a friend who might be interested but shes all over the place, dunno how long i wanna wait for her decision.

i just want to get happy in my life on my own again. i need to get back to who i am because i kind of feel ive lost it or something.

how do you become content with your life?!

Firstly, I think i'm popping my LL cherry with this post.
I did have some opinions for the sanitary products thread, but i never got round to posting them.

I would be a big supporter of the travel option, but that is because I love getting away.
The travelling isn't limited to places like Australia or US though. Maybe go to Africa or Central America or Asia and do some charity work.

Another option that I have thought about is to start learning a language and maybe go somewhere that is in Europe. Paris, Rome, Madrid spring to mind. Another option is to try somewhere like Stockholm or Copenhagen where English is widely spoken and you can slowly learn the language.
Learn Spanish and go to Buenes Aires.
Maybe these are a bit of fantasy on my behalf, but I would prefer to go and have a shot at living in Rome etc than being stuck in Ireland unhappy. Whats the worst that could happen?

And on the subject of travelling alone, I have never done it because myself and the g-friend travelled together. However when we travelled we met so many people who were going solo. We often befriended these people because seen as it was just the 2 of us it was easy to make friends with someone travelling on their own. Usually starts with a chat on a bus or train journey or outside a hostel having a smoke. You would find that people don't look at someone travelling on their own and say "look at that loser on their own", they would be more likely to have some admiration for them and will often have a chat with them.

My brother came out of a long term relationship and he decided that instead of moping around he was going to get his life moving.
He moved to Europe for a year, then came home for 6 months and left for Australia, again on his own. He has since got his sponsorship and see his life there now, at least for the next 5-10 years anyway. He joined a football club, got involved in any social activities going at work and has built up a range of friends having gone there 1 year ago knowing nobody.
The key is that he took the attitude that his relationship breaking up was just a blip and it could be used to kickstart the next stage of his life.

My own personal situation is that I am working here for the next 12-18 months and then I am hoping to emigrate to Canada.
Me and 'her indoors' have been taking steps to actually doing something here in that 18 months instead of just wishing the time away.
Both joined the gym. I went back to playing football. We took on the task of tearing up the shabby garden in our house and are in the process of redoing it. It's a little bit pointless because were not staying around. But it gives something to do in the evenings.
We bought a BBQ and have had a few since the good weather, using it as an opportunity to invite friends over. It's better than getting a takeaway and sitting in front of the telly.

I find it harder to do these things cause i'm not happy here, but when i stick at it, I find myself enjoy life, even though i'm not happy where i am at the moment.
Just try and keep active. Sitting around only compounds the problems, well for me it does anyway.

Sorry about the longest post in the history of Boards....;)

mollybird

little miss i was in the same boat roughly. in my area to get into any job you have ot have a degree/dip. and i had none. was sick of my job but in the end had to go back ot college full time so i could move around in jobs. now it is tough going as im not acedmic but i am so loving it. doing a course/ subjects that you find interesting makes it so much easier. and bringing our professional knowledge into the classroom makes for very interesting debates and discussions.

Black Swan

I would hold off on any major employment moves until Ireland feels the impact of the recession that the USA is slipping into? Oz might be impacted too? With USA markets going into the dumpster, international trade could be affected, as well as jobs in Ireland and the EU? Many USA corporations have sites in Ireland, too. The USA often drags others with it during adverse economic times...