Parenting Forum

Nevyn

sueme wrote: »

I was banned from the Parenting Forum for a week. I don't agree with this. (Surprisingly enough.)

Thead has asked me to take it to Feedback, so may I jump aboard your thread Ludo?

That was a nasty, troll-filled thread, and in my opinion would put alot of parents off posting in Parenting. I have looked and I can't see where I broke the charter, except by perhaps not reporting enough threads.

I suggest you start a new thread about your ban as I will not address it here.

Nevyn

Ludo wrote: »

5 people banned over this? Seems a tad excessive. This could have been avoided with earlier mod intervention and only 3 people come to my mind as possibly deserving a ban.

So I am damned if I do and damned it I don't ?

Ludo wrote: »

This is not meant to be a criticism of you Thaedydal. You are only one person and cannot be expected to spend time policing the forum with your other commitments.

Yes I have had a busy weekend esp today as it is my daughter's birthday
and I am sure the other mods too have lives.

There was only two reported posts on that thread,
again re the charter don't' respond to posts report them.

Ludo wrote: »

I do believe there needs to be more mods on this forum though to help you. Maybe I am wrong here but are the other three mods actively involved in the forum? I apologise in advance if they are but I haven't noticed them in a long time.

There are 3 parenting mods myself included, Oscar Bravo is the Cat mod.

Quality

I think that there is a regular pattern of the same trolls coming in on posts to try and upset the masses....


Sueme got abuse for posting a rant because she was upset her child got burnt on an outing, and suddenly its her fault and she is still getting attacked about it on here on feedback...

Its gone beyond a joke really.. It needs to be sorted out asap.

ntlbell

Quality wrote: »

I think that there is a regular pattern of the same trolls coming in on posts to try and upset the masses....


Sueme got abuse for posting a rant because she was upset her child got burnt on an outing, and suddenly its her fault and she is still getting attacked about it on here on feedback...

Its gone beyond a joke really.. It needs to be sorted out asap.

She wasn't "abused" can you quote where she was abused?

people disagreed with her yes. people felt it was a bit of an over reaction on her behalf, she wasn't abused, certainly not by me anyway

Heinrich

Quality wrote: »

I think that there is a regular pattern of the same trolls coming in on posts to try and upset the masses....


Sueme got abuse for posting a rant because she was upset her child got burnt on an outing, and suddenly its her fault and she is still getting attacked about it on here on feedback...

Its gone beyond a joke really.. It needs to be sorted out asap.

She is responsible for her child regardless of whom she wants to blame!

Coming on to a public forum with this type of rant only encourages comment and some may not agree with her agenda.

As for the moderating let me say BRAVO. It is just and correct.

Quality

Heinrich wrote: »

She is responsible for her child regardless of whom she wants to blame!

Coming on to a public forum with this type of rant only encourages comment and some may not agree with her agenda.

As for the moderating let me say BRAVO. It is just and correct.

Well there you go again.

I am sure when sueme sent her child off there were consent forms signed and insurance was adequate. I am sure she sent her child off thinking that there would be adequate supervision for her child.


Your remarks about her being responsible for her child regardless is a load of horlicks.

Marcus.Aurelius

I agree with the bans, having read the threads in question. It seems like high time some of you learned to be more civil in thread.

Honestly, if you can't abide by the charter then you can't expect to be ignored for breaking the rules.

DeVore

I blame the parents....


DeV.

Sherifu

He didn't just? :eek: He did, didn't he?

ntlbell

Marcus.Aurelius wrote: »

I agree with the bans, having read the threads in question. It seems like high time some of you learned to be more civil in thread.

Honestly, if you can't abide by the charter then you can't expect to be ignored for breaking the rules.

as someone who was banned, it's hard to disagree with the ban's and they shouldn't even be in question.

there's some amount of horse sh|t in this thread tho

TequilaMockingBird

DeVore wrote: »

I blame the parents....


DeV.

Post reported.




*No, really I did. Oh sh*t...

Quality

So basically the parenting forum is the place to go to if you want to be replied to by trolls who would like to make you feel like an inadequate parent,

randylonghorn

Quality wrote: »

I am sure when sueme sent her child off there were consent forms signed and insurance was adequate. I am sure she sent her child off thinking that there would be adequate supervision for her child.

Em, no more than yourself, Quality (or indeed Sueme herself) I wasn't on the trip, but a few questions occur.

How do we know that the group weren't reminded to put on their sun cream, or indeed to put on their t-shirts, but she just ignored the warning (no criticism of the child intended, you can't expect a small child to act as a responsible adult).

Was there all that much sun, or did the children perhaps end up more wind-burned than sun-burned, and did the leaders perhaps under-estimate the likelihood?

If Sueme has always been very very careful about applying sun-protection in the past, perhaps her daughter was more susceptible than other children her age?

I'm sorry for the child if it got burned, and was in pain ... I would never like to see any child in discomfort ... and I can understand Sueme feeling the need to get it off her chest, and perhaps people should just have accorded her that privilege and let the thread die, but it does strike me that this is all being blown out of proportion. Insurance ... for a case of relatively mild sunburn?

Quality wrote: »

Your remarks about her being responsible for her child regardless is a load of horlicks.

As a parent, would you not always feel responsible for your child, no matter who might temporarily be looking after them?

Nevyn

DeVore wrote: »

I blame the parents....


DeV.

You can to a point saying they didn't instill good manners in their off spring but there comes a point where adults should cop on and learn good manners for their own sake.

I do at least hope that some of the parents who post in the forum who have Netiquette pass such things on to their offspring.

Nevyn

Quality wrote: »

So basically the parenting forum is the place to go to if you want to be replied to by trolls who would like to make you feel like an inadequate parent,

Quality no it's not and it is something the mods work hard to be viligent against and yes there are certain trolls ( yes I mean ntlbell and magic marker ) who have started posting in parenting after being banned else where, ( really if I was an smod ntlbell would be site banned ) but you Quality were a part in the train wreck of that thread and you should to stop having such knee jerk reactions to report posts and let the mods deal with it.

TequilaMockingBird

randylonghorn wrote: »

How do we know that the group weren't reminded to put on their sun cream, or indeed to put on their t-shirts, but she just ignored the warning (no criticism of the child intended, you can't expect a small child to act as a responsible adult).

Was there all that much sun, or did the children perhaps end up more wind-burned than sun-burned, and did the leaders perhaps under-estimate the likelihood?

If Sueme has always been very very careful about applying sun-protection in the past, perhaps her daughter was more susceptible than other children her age?

I'm sorry for the child if it got burned, and was in pain ... I would never like to see any child in discomfort ... and I can understand Sueme feeling the need to get it off her chest, and perhaps people should just have accorded her that privilege and let the thread die, but it does strike me that this is all being blown out of proportion. Insurance ... for a case of relatively mild sunburn?

As a parent, would you not always feel responsible for your child, no matter who might temporarily be looking after them?

I have bolded the part of this post as it explains exactly my reasoning behind the original post. Nothing more than venting really.

I also agree with the rest of your post Randy - except for the insurance thing, nooooo!

I use some other Parenting specific Forums, and this type of a reaction to a fairly mundane rant would be unheard of. Its left a nasty taste tbh.

(Btw, I'm not sure where I should be posting this reply, its gotten rather confusing now - but seen as people here are discussing me, my child, and my parenting skills, my lack of internet skills etc, I guess here will do.)

randylonghorn

Thaedydal wrote: »

Netiquette

"If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise ..."

Netiquette a la Rudyard Kipling! :pac:

popebenny16

You know what everyone thinks they're the worlds best parent. Hell, I have a badge that says I'm the best dad in the world. When someone critisises you, it's natural to take it to heart. The thing is you can disagree with those who criticise you without it being insulting or abusive, you can even say " I don't agree with you"

If they keep annoying you, report them, and put them on ignore - that way they'll never rile you. I'm still surprised at how many people dong use the ignore button.

As for harping on about Child Protection law, just mention that you dont think there is one and move on. No point in making such a big deal of it that you get banned. There are many laws we have simply imported, Thayd may know of some really good ones out there and far from making her points invalid, it actually could reinforce them as it shows she had wide experience and a desire to actually look at how things are done elsewhere.

Quality

randylonghorn wrote: »

Em, no more than yourself, Quality (or indeed Sueme herself) I wasn't on the trip, but a few questions occur.

How do we know that the group weren't reminded to put on their sun cream, or indeed to put on their t-shirts, but she just ignored the warning (no criticism of the child intended, you can't expect a small child to act as a responsible adult).

Was there all that much sun, or did the children perhaps end up more wind-burned than sun-burned, and did the leaders perhaps under-estimate the likelihood?

If Sueme has always been very very careful about applying sun-protection in the past, perhaps her daughter was more susceptible than other children her age?

I'm sorry for the child if it got burned, and was in pain ... I would never like to see any child in discomfort ... and I can understand Sueme feeling the need to get it off her chest, and perhaps people should just have accorded her that privilege and let the thread die, but it does strike me that this is all being blown out of proportion. Insurance ... for a case of relatively mild sunburn?

As a parent, would you not always feel responsible for your child, no matter who might temporarily be looking after them?

Thanks for your reply Randy

I feel you have asked very relevant questions there, you have made your comments in a very mature way, without criticism and most of them are very relevant. Well done.

I have to agree with all that is said. I do always feel responsible for my kids, My mother made sure we were instilled with the good aul Irish catholic guilt for anything that went wrong growing up. When my kids are upset I am upset.

Sueme, just wanted to rant. A few little sympathetic answers were given and then there were some whoppers...
"Bubblewrap" FFS.



Anyhow, I dont want to go on about this anymore, I am happy with Thaeds reply to me above. I feel that I have taken her points on board and look forward to next week in Parenting.

I think that it provides very valued feedback to us parents, its nice to have other peoples opinions. Less of the personal attacks and it should run a lot smoother.:)

ntlbell

Thaedydal wrote: »

( really if I was an smod ntlbell would be site banned )

site banned? why are you even bringing this up in this thread?

why would you site ban me?

who would pull you up when you're talking nonsense then?

you just don't like me because I got your number baby.;)

Quality

ntlbell wrote: »

site banned? why are you even bringing this up in this thread?

why would you site ban me?

who would pull you up when you're talking nonsense then?

you just don't like me because I got your number baby.;)

post reported

Marcus.Aurelius

Careful now.

Nevyn

ntlbell wrote: »

site banned? why are you even bringing this up in this thread?

Oh just nailing my colours to the mast and stating my prejudice plainly
but I managed to rise above it and give you the same length of a ban as everyone else i felt was acting the prick in that thread.
But beware your trolling pattern has been noted.

ntlbell wrote: »

why would you site ban me?

I don't like you or your posting/trolling style.

ntlbell wrote: »

you just don't like me because I got your number baby.;)

Oh the joy of sexual harrashement in feedback so you are admitting that you are troll stalking the forums I post in, first PI then parrots normal and now parenting ?

TequilaMockingBird

As there are no Mods in Feedback is there any point reporting a thread? Or do the Admins get the lovely job?

Sure I'll report him anyway.

Marcus.Aurelius

sueme wrote: »

As there are no Mods in Feedback is there any point reporting a thread? Or do the Admins get the lovely job?

Sure I'll report him anyway.

Admins respond to well presented feedback when they get a spare moment.

TequilaMockingBird

Marcus.Aurelius wrote: »

Admins respond to well presented feedback when they get a spare moment.

Nice one. As this appears to be my stumbling block, not reporting posts. Must stay vigilant.

pirelli

Heinrich wrote: »

She is responsible for her child regardless of whom she wants to blame!

Coming on to a public forum with this type of rant only encourages comment and some may not agree with her agenda.

As for the moderating let me say BRAVO. It is just and correct.

You got banned aswell Heinrich. Why were you banned: Open your own thread.
Anyway it was probably raining when the child went on her day trip with a full set of days clothes. I am sure the suncream only came out if the weather permitted and there was a thin cloud cover or excessively sunny. That's the resposibility to adapt to the changing weather patterns.

If someone went mountain climbing with a guide in the Alps and got lost in due to blizzard and or walked through a glacier and fell down a crevice. These would all be your guides responsibilites to take appropiate action in the instance of changing weather and adopt an appropiate direction and to avoid glaciers etc.. That's a fact. People could sue for that.


Unexpected and changing weather patterns are the responsibility of the staff at the centre. Anyway Seume shoudln't have been banned, and Thaedydal just made matters worse, implying there was specific irish acts of legislation that expressly forbids the application of suncream which is a complete fraud.

Overheal

On a cloudy day you can still rack up enough UV exposure to suffer from burns. My arms and legs are evidence enough of that. Sunny Florida or Gloomy Ireland: its irrelevant. You do get a reduced factor of exposure the farther north you get, however you are still accumulating exposure over time. When a child goes unprotected for several hours the results can be harsh. So you might get the same exposure in 30 minutes in Florida what you would in an hour or so in Ireland.

Also for the record: up at Altitudes (like mountain climbing) you run even greater risks of UV exposure. Falling down a crevice is all well and good but how bad will you feel when its 30 below and your skin is burnt to a crisp? I imagine its hell.

The simplest protection method is long sleeves and perhaps a hat, but for more serious bouts of exposure, or where lighter clothing is preferred (swimming for instance) go with a sunblock around the region of SPF 30. For the treatment of sunburns (and I've had more than I care to recall accurately) Aloe Vera lotions are strongly advised to numb burnt areas of skin, and then apply a Vitamin E moisturizer to try (usually in vain but not always) to prevent peeling. Aloe helps most here because it stops the itching, hence the scratching, which leads to ever gross peeling. Finally a painkiller can be useful for serious bouts of discomfort.

KnifeWRENCH

I have seen ntlbell and Magic Marker trolling in other fora - they deserve a ban.
pirelli deserved his ban because he wouldn't stop harping on about that child protection thingy, and now his feedback thread has descended into epic fail territory.

However sueme's banning was harsh. I thought she reacted well, given the situation. She didn't personally abuse anyone from what I could see, and I do think the ban should be reconsidered.

Overheal

randylonghorn wrote: »

Don't really frequent the parenting forum, so can't / won't comment on it specifically.

Couple of standard questions to think about though (addressed to all users, not anyone in particular) ...

... If you are unhappy about posts, have you reported them? Mods aren't around all the time, they have their own lives to lead, and reported posts help them immensely to zone in on any potential problems when they do log on.

... Are you responding to what you consider trollish posts / arguing with the "trolls"? If they really are trolls, this is exactly what they want, so by getting into an argument with them rather than ignoring them, you are perpetuating the problem.

... Are you sure these are all trolls, or perhaps some of them are people who just don't agree with you? You'll find that happens now and again in life, especially on forums for discussion. (Mind you, disagreement does not include being told "you're a ***** parent", if that actually happened!)

+1

I've brushed Elbows with Magic Marker too Igloo, but I don't think he's in my trollbook (yet )