the three trials

The Bollox

Paddy Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman are all caught by a barbaric tribe while travelling around Central Africa. They are all brought before the chief of the tribe who looks at the three prisoners and starts shouting and pointing at them. the three men were baffled when another of the tribe translates "you three have trespassed on our sacred grounds and shall be killed for doing so, unless you can pass three tests of courage". The three men look worriedly at each other while the translator continues "first you must drink a barrel of alcohol" and he points towards a stack of barrels. "Then you must pull a tooth from the captured tiger in this cage" and points to a cage draped in a tent "and finally you must make love to Tahaok-Tok and points towards a very unattractive woman".

Paddy Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman all take nervous glances to each other and Paddy Englishman is first up. He walks towards the stack of barrels and starts drinking from one. he gets three quarters the way through and drops dead from alcohol poisoning. The tribe cheers.

next up is Paddy Scotsman, he walks towards the stack of barrels and starts drinking. he finally finishes and meanders towards the tiger cage, walks in and after a lot of screeching and roaring the severed arm of Paddy Scotsman flies out of the cage and the tribe cheers.

Finally Paddy Irishman is up. He runs over to the stack of barrels and shotguns one of them down. next he runs a little crookedly towards the tiger cage and runs in. 20 minutes later, after a lot of screeching and roaring Paddy Irishman emerges, sh*tfaced and covered in sweat, and through a lot of wheezing says "now where's this woman whose tooth I've to pull out?"

flanzer

Ha, very good. I can almost picture it! Have some stars

rocky25

Nice...have some of dem shiny pointy thingies