Patter

Loomis

Two Geordie guys sitting in the office chatting when this girl passes them going to the toilet.
Bob says 'I think she's nice.'
Bobs mate 'well nip over and give her the patter.'
Bob 'the patter?'
Bobs mate 'aye the patter.'
Bob 'I don't know any patter, I've never found it easy to talk to girls.'
'For crying out loud' says Bobs Mate, 'it's easy all you have
to say is 'hello' and she will say 'hello.' Then say 'it's a
nice day isn't it?'
Then she will say 'Yes it is.'
Then you say ' but not half as nice as you!'
Then she will say 'Oh thank you'
Then the patter will just flow.'
Bobs Mate says 'look there she coming back out of the toilet, go and give it a go.'
So nervously off he goes, re-running the patter in his head.
He walks up and says 'Hello.'
She says 'Hello.'
He says 'It's a nice day isn't it?'
She says 'Yes it is.'
He says 'but not half as nice as you.'
She says 'Oh thank you!'
Few seconds of uneasy silence..............................
Then he says........................................

'Ya been for a sh*te then pet?'
Laughing