Telling your parents about your first time.

brianthebard

sam34 wrote: »

oh i know, i hadnt, i was young and innocent back then!:D

but too innocent to let someone try to eat the neck off ya?Nice...

sam34

brianthebard wrote: »

but too innocent to let someone try to eat the neck off ya?Nice...

oh i'm a classy bird all right!:D

Slidey

sam34 wrote: »

oh i'm a classy bird all right!:D

Bird?:eek:

There is me making presumtions again.. wouldn't mind but i went out with a girl called sam too..

sam34

slideways wrote: »

Bird?:eek:

There is me making presumtions again.. wouldn't mind but i went out with a girl called sam too..

my real name isnt sam, but i just picked it as my username for boards
but yep, im a bird

punchdrunk

i guess i was about twenty or so,wasn't my "first" but it was the first my mother had really met,she thought she was lovely! bought her presents,she even bought her the herbal tea bags she liked :rolleyes:

anyways after a while sure i thought, "grand the mammy knows the score,invite her to stay over so"

were sitting there & watching a film all cosy on the couch whatever,suddenly the mammy's night out gets surprisingly canceled :cool:
anyway,its getting late and in she waltz's with the fold-up bed :eek:

despite hushed protests to the mammy in the kitchen about some serious embarrassment at stake here i went up to bed in a huff (i shared the room with my older brother)

after a while the phone goes,suggesting i pay the sitting room a night visit,sure how could i say no!?

unfortunately,the old dear's room was right over the living room,and our old house wasn't the best sound proofed gaff in the world...

snook back into bed about six a.m,like james bond so i was
happy out,the missus left for work and all was well or so it seemed...

houston we have a problem!
i think it was the sound of the furious stirring of the tea that i could hear from the first step of the stairs that gave it away

she's only 17!!!,does her mother know she slept here? you could be done for being a pedophile! :eek::eek::eek: she had tears in her eyes as if she'd just walked in on me doing lines off a nuns back on the sofa
after an outburst of about twenty mintues she never mentioned it again,but from then on that girls cards were marked and she wasn't held in the same light ever again!

Slidey

had tears in her eyes as if she'd just walked in on me doing lines off a nuns back on the sofa

Deadly.. *saves in memory for future use*

brianthebard

slideways wrote: »

Bird?:eek:

There is me making presumtions again.. .

lolz i wasn't sure either.

Tar.Aldarion

LadyJ wrote: »

I grew up with two women in their 70s/80s looking after me. I'm still a virgin as far as they're concerned.

Ah now, sure nobody would believe that!

aliqueenb

punchdrunk wrote: »

i guess i was about twenty or so,wasn't my "first" but it was the first my mother had really met,she thought she was lovely! bought her presents,she even bought her the herbal tea bags she liked :rolleyes:

anyways after a while sure i thought, "grand the mammy knows the score,invite her to stay over so"

were sitting there & watching a film all cosy on the couch whatever,suddenly the mammy's night out gets surprisingly canceled :cool:
anyway,its getting late and in she waltz's with the fold-up bed :eek:

despite hushed protests to the mammy in the kitchen about some serious embarrassment at stake here i went up to bed in a huff (i shared the room with my older brother)

after a while the phone goes,suggesting i pay the sitting room a night visit,sure how could i say no!?

unfortunately,the old dear's room was right over the living room,and our old house wasn't the best sound proofed gaff in the world...

snook back into bed about six a.m,like james bond so i was
happy out,the missus left for work and all was well or so it seemed...

houston we have a problem!
i think it was the sound of the furious stirring of the tea that i could hear from the first step of the stairs that gave it away

she's only 17!!!,does her mother know she slept here? you could be done for being a pedophile! :eek::eek::eek: she had tears in her eyes as if she'd just walked in on me doing lines off a nuns back on the sofa
after an outburst of about twenty mintues she never mentioned it again,but from then on that girls cards were marked and she wasn't held in the same light ever again!

what age were you when you were with the 17 year old?

punchdrunk

19 maybe 20
she turned 18 about two months after!

hussey

punchdrunk wrote: »

anyways after a while sure i thought, "grand the mammy knows the score,invite her to stay over so"

(i shared the room with my older brother)

Were you going to ask her to stay whilst in the same room as your bro???

overexcitedaj

my mother came across and empty box of condoms while she was cleaning my room one day and she just turned to me and said nice to see your safe. That was embarrassing.

Slidey

overexcitedaj wrote: »

my mother came across and empty box of condoms while she was cleaning my room one day and she just turned to me and said nice to see your safe. That was embarrassing.

with a nick name like that you must use the extra thick ones to delay things a bit!:D

overexcitedaj

slideways wrote: »

with a nick name like that you must use the extra thick ones to delay things a bit!:D

haha. Nawp dont let the name fool you son.

taidghbaby

slightly off topic but.....

a few years ago i met a girl out and brought her home to a relations holiday home down the road from the parents house!

on the way home that night girl lost her phone and the battery on mine went too!

i dropped her home at about 3 the next day and dropped into a friends' house on my home. as i strolled into his sitting room he start looking at me strangely and i ask him whats wrong!

he proceeds to tell me that the girls' father that i had brought home the night before had spent most the day looking for his innocent (the girl would have been 20 at the time so not exactly young) daughter, rang most my friends, my parents and the guards, and had come to the conclusion that i had kidnapped/raped/killed his daughter!!!!!!!!!

the best part of it though was my father telling me about his conversation with the girls father!

yer man: 'my daughter is missing and she was last seen with your son'
my dad: 'since when?'
yer man: 'last night'
my dad: 'so, sure there probably still together somewhere'
yer man: 'well if i dont see her in 15mins im gonna call the guards'
my dad: 'do you know what you do so?'
yer man: 'what?' (thinking my father had the solution)
my dad: 'go fcuk yourself'

January

Rozabeez wrote: »

Many months after my first time, my mother and I were in the car stuck in traffic, she hits the button that locks all the doors

That's how I told my mother I was pregnant...

mumhaabu

LMFAO
Good man taidgh's dad, I wonder if the parents of daughters ever think back to when they were young and liked a bit on the side themselves. These type of parents are hypocrite's and it is this type of parenting that usually leads to teenage pregnancies and I bet he thought "his little princess 20 you say! should never have sex", I bet they'd lock her into a nunnery if they had their way.

dr.bollocko

mumhaabu wrote: »

LMFAO
Good man taidgh's dad, I wonder if the parents of daughters ever think back to when they were young and liked a bit on the side themselves. These type of parents are hypocrite's and it is this type of parenting that usually leads to teenage pregnancies and I bet he thought "his little princess 20 you say! should never have sex", I bet they'd lock her into a nunnery if they had their way.

Don't be mental. Nobody had sex in Ireland at all until Johnny Logan.
And even then it was missionary with the lights out through a hole in a sheet.

My parents are both 3rd generation virgins.
Aint no condom ever made gonna protect from immaculate conception.

mahamageehad

kowloon wrote: »

Noisy beds are a killer, move mattress to the floor ftw!

haha jst toss the duvet on thefloor or failing that invest in a nice mat!!

funniest thread iv read in a long time!!! ROFL!!!

slightly off-topic cause my ma guessed when she found out i was on the pill.........
*cough cough to regulate my cycle*
Anyways the current bf, lovely lad o 20, im 18, stayed at my house last nite after a nite on the booze. Sher I went to work this mornin as usual. Then his dad rang my dad and woke him up and asked him
"is that youngfella of mine hanging around in your house somewhere. If you find him throw a bucket of cold water over the f****r and tell him i better see him at half 10 mass if he knows whats good for him!"

Nearly wet myself laughing!!!!

MJOR

I was a late starter. Started going out with a guy and stayed over a few times in his place and started coming in around six having two hours kip and heading to work.

We weren't at it at the time but one night the envitable happened.(For the record he had a willy like a chicken nugget) Had to travel the next day so i skuked hime around 5 got up around eight and my dad was downstairs and said (i kid you not) "morning love fancy a sausage?"
(he was making a fry). Classic!

dr.bollocko

MJOR wrote: »

chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget, chicken nugget,

Playing over and over and over in my head like a police siren.

sam34

MJOR wrote: »

.(For the record he had a willy like a chicken nugget)

ROFL but thats totally ruined chicken nuggets for me (and theyre the only thing i like in macdonalds):(

Slidey

MJOR wrote: »

(For the record he had a willy like a chicken nugget)

What? did it taste like chicken, but actually have no direct link to chicken?

Or was it all crusty on the outside?

Dont think i will get the sour cream dip with my mcnugget meal next time:eek:

sam34

slideways wrote: »

Dont think i will get the sour cream dip with my mcnugget meal next time:eek:

eewwwww eewwwww eeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!
did you have to post that??!!!
no more mcd's for me. EVER!

brianthebard

That is so wrong on so many level mjor!Explanations needed please!

LovelyTom

I didn't tell them I'd done it the first time, they told me. They'd found the half empty box of condoms that was half revealed in my sock drawer

Thought I'd get revenge and see what's in my dad's sock drawer and leave the drawer open with it's filthy contents uncovered. Went in to see what was there and I found the mother-load. Scary scary stuff in that drawer, so scary in fact that I didn't want them to know I saw it...


*shudders*

A7X

LovelyTom wrote: »

I didn't tell them I'd done it the first time, they told me. They'd found the half empty box of condoms that was half revealed in my sock drawer

Thought I'd get revenge and see what's in my dad's sock drawer and leave the drawer open with it's filthy contents uncovered. Went in to see what was there and I found the mother-load. Scary scary stuff in that drawer, so scary in fact that I didn't want them to know I saw it...


*shudders*

I think that was the worst decision you ever made

LovelyTom

A7X wrote: »

I think that was the worst decision you ever made

It probably is in the top 10 alright... There really wasn't many socks in that drawer

angeldelight

I'd swear my mother still thinks I'm a virgin, and I don't think my dad thinks about it too much at all! Was buying a new bra yesterday while out with herself and showed her the lining which was very pretty and she pipes up "sure who's going to see it only yourself" and I'm thinking hmmm my bf of 2 years perhaps??? She knows when we go away we get a double room, and she knows I sleep in his room when I stay over in his but she's still in denial! His mam is fine with me sleeping in his room but she does think my mam lets him sleep in my bed and only agreed with it on that basis... there's been a few lapses of concentration where I've referred to "going down to wake X", who has to sleep on our couch when he stays over but don't think she's noticed...

MJOR

Right I wasn't expecting people to pick up on the chicken nugget thing... maybe it was more like a goujon just weird shaped and tiny. Nice guy though...