been told my dog needs to be put to sleep

paulac

Hi, I've had my dog honey for the past 13 years since I was 10. She's an absolute nut case but had been getting sick an awful lot over the past few weeks and she was a bit stiff so I had been bringing her to the vet every week or two for about 2 months. On wednesay I came home and opened the back door for her and she went outside, I came down and saw her just lying on the decking in the lashing rain so I went out to try and get her in, she couldn't stand up. She's a big dog so I had to carry her back into the house and she hasn't been able to stand since then. I brought her to the vet again yesterday and he almost started crying himself when he told me that there was nothing that could be done. The first time I brought her to him, he'd said that her hips were really bad and he would keep her as comfortable as he could. She doesn't seem to be in any pain but the vet said she was and asked me if I wanted to make the decision there and then to put her to sleep. I wanted to take her home and I still can;t think straight. Its just that she looks fine and she's eating and drinking and playing with her toys and wagging her tail but she can't get up. I know I can't hold onto her but its just so hard to let go.

I need to decide if I'm going to put her through the trauma of bringing her back to the vet, as I said, she's a big dog so she had to be carried and she really didn't like it. If I bring her, am I going to be able to stay there with her when they do it. I think I should but I'm not sure if I could keep it together, actually I'm pretty sure I'd get a bit hysterical. Has anyone had this experience and could advise.
Can I get a vet to come to the house and do it there?
Burying/ cremation/ leave the body with the vet? I don't know what to do, any advice would be appreciated.

Thanks

Paula

MarkR

My mothers dog was on his last legs, he got a reprieve after an unexpected improvement. Saying that, it doesn't seem like your dog can have any quality of life. If she can't walk then she'll get no excercise, won't be able to go to the bathroom properly. Will be able to eat, but I assume with difficulty. It's obviously a terrible decision to have to make. I suppose one option to set your mind at ease would be to get a second opinion, but I wouldn't hope for much. I don't think vets normally put dogs to sleep outside of their surgeries, but no harm asking. Saying that if you get it done at the surgery the vet can make arrangements more easily for burial / cremation. I reckon when my little buddy goes it'll break me. Will probably go the cremation route myself and scatter the ashes after a while.

Best of luck, enjoy the time you have left.

whitser

a vet could do it at home for you. as for burying it, you can do it yourself or the vet will take care of it, but you might have to take her to the vets for that.

tobiesheba

It's really sad when the time comes to say goodbye to pets which have become part of the family and that you've grown up with.

When this happened with my dog the vet came to our house to give him an injection and it was so much better than in the surrounds of the sterile surgery. But I think this will depend on your vet if he/she is one which deals with farm animals as well they will be used to making house calls. If they just deal with smaller animals and pets, they may only exclusively work out of their surgery. Either way I reckon it doesn't hurt to ask.

Lord Muck

I had to do something similar last year.You can stay in the room with the vet when it gets done , its over in a couple of seconds , the dog just goes asleep , its actually quiet peaceful. The vet can deal with body after if you want.

LisaO

Hi Paula

So sorry to hear you have to make this decision and unfortunately it is up to you - anyone else, including your vet, can only advise. Firstly, you know Honey better than anyone, so you will know when the time has come. You need to try & look at the situation through Honey's eyes and do what you know she would want you to do.

When the time comes, you can choose to bring Honey to the vet surgery and you can stay with her if you wish, for as long as you want to. Or you can ask your vet to come to your home, where Honey will be in familiar surroundings, with all her things around her. Afterwards, again, it is your call, you can decide what you would like & I'm sure your vet will respect your wishes - he sounds like a very caring man.

Had exactly the same experience 7 years ago with our labrador. He was 16 & had problems with his hips for a few years. He got very stiff & immobile in the end & one evening collapsed outside & couldn't get up to come back in. We brought him inside & made him as comfortable as we could for the night. Next day, he had soiled his bed because he couldn't get up & for us we knew then it was time - he was always such a proud & clean dog & this seemed to distress him beyond anything else. I rang our vet, who knew that such a call could be coming & took him straight in to them. I stayed with him but my husband couldn't do it. It was extremely dignified & gentle. I held his head throughout & talked to him & when the vet had completed the injection, she left the room as well. As I held him, he gave a huge, long sigh -he really was letting go but the sense of peace I had at that moment was incredible & I knew in my heart it was the right decision.

Have to stop now, as can't type for tears but sure many others here will be able to give their own experiences of the situation. It is always going to be unbearably sad but at least you can make it dignified for your pet. I think it is true that it is the ultimate act of kindness - they have always done right by you & this your chance to repay their loyalty and devotion.

Very best wishes for you & Honey.

mollydolly271

I had to do the exact same thing last year had the dog since i was 10 and grew up with her 16 years is a long time for a dog and she had the best time the night before she was put down we all gathered in my mams and brought all her favorite treats and stuffed her with them also we all slept in the sitting room with her (she norally slept outside) we took loads of photos and videos of her (though all of us are crying our eyes out in them) and the next morning we took her for an extra long walk together and then to the vet......
One piece of advice is that its all over VERY quick (which is a good thing) but say what you have to her as soon as possible.
As auful as it sounds it was a relief because the vet had told us how much pain she was in and to be the one who kept her suffering was unbearable... also she loved playing in the grass in our back garden and that was where so many of our good memories of her were that we buried her there, my dad made a cross and goes out to say good night to her very night, good luck i know u will make the right decision for your dog, check out the web site www.petlose.com it helped me

SuzyBoo

I have been that soldier too. Had to make the decision to put our pet to sleep and it broke my heart but knew it was the right thing to do. Vet came to house and was incredibly sensitive. Our darling buried in shade of leafy shrub she used to laze under on sunny days when in full health. Little cross on grave too. Like OP can't write for tears. Feel great sympathy for you.

Peyton Manning

Again, I also had to do that with my dog's Ben and Lassie. They were the most beautiful show dogs you've ever seen - both Rough Collies. Ben in particular was a king. Judges often said that as soon as he entered a show, he would win Best In Show. Have hundreds of trophies and rosettes from both of them. They both got very old and had to be put down. Lassie's situation was very similar to yours. Her hips got very bad, and she couldnt even stand up. It was so sad to see her lying there, struggling to move.

Getting her put down was the humance thing to do. I hope you do what's right for the dog.

kerrysgold

What exactly is wrong with her hips? arthritis or what? is she on any medication? I think you should try everything before resorting to pts, especially if she is happy in herself.

golden

Hi Paulac

I am very sorry to hear your news.

Like Lisao has mentioned you have to do what is best for your pet.

I have lost a dog last year and its still pretty raw but know only too well it was in the in the best interest for my dog. Shandy was part of the family incidently had artrithis since the age of two and also a skin complaint but never was nasty or aggressive always the wagging tail greeting you all the time. Then time came for Shandy when he collasped, we brought him to the vet and found that he had cancer of the spleen and would need to have an operation to remove the spleen. We asked the vet what benefit would it be for shandy he mentioned it would give him 6 months more then that was it. It was not really fair on Shandy to go through a operation (he was 14 when he died). It was the hardest decision we had to do but it had to be done.

Listen to your vet.

BlackCat2008

So sorry to hear your news, mine was the same, she use to sleep at the sitting room door but began to howl when we'd ask her to get up, what made it harder was the money grabbing vet kept saying she's over weight so we walked the legs of her and only gave her min. food. After about six months she really struggled so we got a second opinion from the best vets in the world I still trust, they said she had been suffering for over a year and if we had of gone to him a year even 6 months back he could have given her meditation and she would of had a better ending. I was only 15 at the time and I was so angry with the other eedit vet starving her and walking her when she was in so much pain, I tuck her for a short walk to the river and just sat crying with her for hours before we tuck her in to be pts and brought her home to be buried. I was to young to sue the vet and my Mam was so up set that she just wanted to put it all behind her. Look into Honey's eye's they'll tell you when the time comes they can't speak out so they have to rely on the ones they trust to do right by them, in my opinion once they go down thats enough for me to say good buy they rarely get back up, it's the hardest thing in the world to do because you have to control the situation, if I could turn back time I'd have taken her to the good vets and tryed some meds but I would not have aloud her to have lived that extra 6 months.

And don't worry you never forget them even after 15 yrs I still step over the door step in the sitting room thinking she's sleeping and trying not to walk her and in my sleep in the morning when I'm just waking I swear I can still hear her panting in my ear waiting for my to get up for school that was her job to get everyone up for school and she was so proud of herself when she did running back down for a pet from my Mam to say she had done well.

You have to put a side your emotions just for a bit and think what is best for her, make the decision and follow it through if she has no quality of life she is only suffering, it's hard and your heart will ache but you'll know in the end you've done the right thing. Once she stops doing her favorite things it's time to let go.

My thoughts are with you's both.

paulac

That was one of the most heartbreaking experiences of my life. I tried to get the vet on saturday but he was only free on friday evening so I had to go with that. God knows what I was like in work, I tried to keep it together! My dad stayed with honey all day and I came home early. I was glad I came hoem when I did because she wasn't great and then I knew I had to go ahead with it. I gave her a wash and she was so passive, when I gave her painkillers she perked up so I knew it was just the painkillers numbing it. About 15-16 people called in throughout the day and evening to say goodbye which I thought was so strange and touching. I spent soem time with her on my own and told her what was going on. The vet came at about 8 and my dad and I stayed with her. It was very peaceful, she just put her head down and went to sleep, and she was gone. She's buried in the garden, in her patch! With all her toys. The house is so quiet. And the first time I went to the shop and came home, turned the key and walked in, I was so heart broken! I forgot and was expecting to see her bounding up the hall with the tail wagging! Huge void in my heart. Thanks for all your support and help with this, I really appreciate it.

Paula

Clare Bear

Tears streaming down my face right now I know and feel your pain. 3 years since my buddy Max had to be put to sleep. I miss him just as much now as I did then. There's still that void whenever I go home to my parents' house even though we have 4 other dogs, he was always my best pal. You did the right thing, you couldn't leave her suffer any longer. You'll never forget her but maybe in time you can give another dog such a kind and loving home. Take care, know that you did the best thing for Honey x

spurious

You did the right thing paulac.
It's something I know I will probably have to face for my own little soldier who is 17 at the moment and slowing.

I don't look forward to it at all, but I know that sad and all as it will be it will be the last act of love I can do for him in return for all the joy he has brought people over the 17 years.

arybvtcw0eolkf

spurious wrote: »

I don't look forward to it at all, but I know that sad and all as it will be it will be the last act of love I can do for him in return for all the joy he has brought people over the 17 years.

And I think those words reflect how we all feel.

Threads like this serve to remind us just how little time we have with our pets.

It reminds us of the love we give, and the unconditional love & devotion we receive in return.

They ask for little, nothing in fact other than a loving home, a comfortable bed and a full tummy. And for the little we give, we're so much the richer in return.

Stheno

Mairt wrote: »

And I think those words reflect how we all feel.

Threads like this serve to remind us just how little time we have with our pets.

It reminds us of the love we give, and the unconditional love & devotion we receive in return.

They ask for little, nothing in fact other than a loving home, a comfortable bed and a full tummy. And for the little we give, we're so much the richer in return.

Well said !

Paulac sorry to read of your loss I know just how heartbreaking it can be.

Best wishes to you all

LisaO

So sorry to hear that, Paula. Thinking of you & your family. Take care of yourselves.

animalcrazy

I'm so sorry, I know how it feels when a pet has to be pts.

BlackCat2008

I know how hard that was for you it's never easy and I think Mairt says it best and as I said you want forget her ever but she will remember the kindness of the life you gave her and the kindness to put her out of her suffering. I read some were that if dogs don't go to heaven, I want to go were they are when I pass on. I think everyone hear feles the same.

In time it will heal and some lucky dog will help to fill the gap and recieve the same kindness as honey and give you the same devotion.

I'm sorry for your loss and she'll always be in your heart and your mind at rest for doing the right thing.

sn00ps

Paula

really sorry to hear of your news. I had to say goodbye to my buddy Charlie last year and it was heartbreaking, even tho I knew it was the best thing to do.

I'm not sure if you believe in doggy heaven .. but I found this on the web and I am really sure he's sitting there waiting for me ..

http://www.petloss.com/poems/maingrp/rainbowb.htm

HTH

It really helps me to think about him bounding around fit as a fiddle and knowing I made the right decision.

Take care and you are in my thoughts ..

Sn00ps

username123

Hi Paula,
Thats so sad. I really feel for you. Ive had to say goodbye to a number of pets over the years - it doesnt get any easier. You only get to borrow them for a while, they dont live as long as us.

What you have to remember is all the joy she gave you, all the fun you had and how much of a Good Girl she was. Youve done the best thing for her, when dogs get old and its time to go to Rainbow Bridge its best to let them go. Its peaceful for them. She is off now, wagging her tail, running around, playing with her toys and having a great time. To have kept her alive would have been for you and not for her - it was the responsible thing to do to let her go.

Keep talking about her, dont let her memory go because it feels sad, remember all the good stuff and the things that made you smile, the more you remember and talk about her the more joy she will continue to bring you in years to come.

If youre a reader Id advise the book Marley and Me in a little while - its a great story of the love between dog and owner. Youd be a bit raw for it yet though.

Best of luck to you - if there were more animals lovers in the world like you (and others on this thread) the world would be a better place.