Stand up and Be Proud!

Havermeyer

The first pic.

Curvy ladies are hotter, imo.

MILF

This is kind of a sore point with me, as much as it pains me to say. I'm a size 17 (if there is such a thing!) I used to be a size 20, borderline 22 because I ate myself silly as I was in such a horrible relationship and found comfort in food. I found the strength to leave that relationship and realised there was more to life then sitting at home and eating. I started to gain the courage to go out again and experience life and slowly I noticed the weight dropping off. I dropped down to a 14/16 and lost 4 and a smidge stone (pat on the back for me!!) and gained a new (fabulous) boyf.
Just when I was FINALLY happy with my weight, I got pregnant! I managed not to put on too much weight while pregnant but I suffered with Post Natal Depression after and all of a sudden all those feelings came back to me from before and next thing I knew the weight started creeping back up.
Ive now found myself researching tummy tucks and lipo online and reading endless mags on how all the celebs are eating to stay slim and I'm just SO SICK thinking about "should I be really eating this" and "Is he gonna leave me now that I've put on a bit of weight" and thinking constantly about my weight and the fact that there's pressure out there from society to be a certain size and, god forbid, if you're anything over that then your just classed as fat. End of story.

Its only been 7 months since I had the baby but I'm so sick of myself!

Sorry I went off on a rant but I'm wound up!!

Nevyn

Comfort eating is the devil.
You need to change what you are snacking on.

Cleb Moms who are back in shape like that are freaks.
[nsfw]http://theshapeofamother.com[nsfw]

The thing is milf you have done it before you can do it again but you really need to look at where those insecurity issues are coming from.

MILF

You're right, comfort eating is beyond the devil. Ive really dont know what to say. I dont really know where it comes from. Part of me is bone lazy with preparing food and having the motivation to work all day and then come home and cook when there's a takeaway menu in the press and part of me is like have I really got the willpower and the determination to stop eating crap and start eating the proper things.

Dont get me wrong, my whole diet isnt s***. I do eat breakfast, I dont really have a sweet tooth, I dont drink fizzy drinks apart from maybe in the cinema and I drink loads and loads of water every day. I never exercise and I know that's a big part of losing weight and I think that's where I lose motivation.

I don't know...

iMax

A personal bugbear of mine is the use of the words "Plus Sized", "Big Boned" & "Large". It's fat. Plain and simple. Don't wanna be fat? eat less & exercise more.

I'm male, about 20Lbs overweight & have been pretty much all my life, actually I have been heavier (about 15.5st - now 14.5 st) I have man boobs & a stomach. I've left weight watchers twice because eating my "Daily points Allowance" caused me to gain weight (is that a first?)

I have a really slow metabolism & a very sweet tooth. However, I'm also happy about me. Because of my 44inch chest if I was my proper BMI I would be a very strange shape.

All the "Plus Sized", "Big Boned" & "Large" does is put you in a box. And as you all know everybody's a different shape & not every shape fits every box.

MILF

Apparently if you have a slow metabolism the way forward is "Green Tea Extract". They're for sale in Holland & Barrett for €6.99 and it flushes you out and speeds up your metabolic rate. Get ready to wee a lot though if you do take them.

See, all this reading of celeb mags sometimes does pay off!

Nevyn

MILF wrote: »

You're right, comfort eating is beyond the devil. Ive really dont know what to say. I dont really know where it comes from. Part of me is bone lazy with preparing food and having the motivation to work all day and then come home and cook when there's a takeaway menu in the press and part of me is like have I really got the willpower and the determination to stop eating crap and start eating the proper things.

Dont get me wrong, my whole diet isnt s***. I do eat breakfast, I dont really have a sweet tooth, I dont drink fizzy drinks apart from maybe in the cinema and I drink loads and loads of water every day. I never exercise and I know that's a big part of losing weight and I think that's where I lose motivation.

I don't know...

You have had a baby and your whole world and how you live your life and the demands on you and your time have changed drastically.
Hell you have not even gotten over the first year and also it takes two years for your pelvis, back and muscles to regroup after having a child.

Your not supermom and nor should you try to be but you need to treat yourself better and you will get there.

MILF

Well that's true. It's actually baby no.2 - the first one's 5 now plus I had a caesarean on the two of them. That alone means I'm never gonna have a flat tum but I just wanna feel good about myself again and feel confident in my own skin. I miss that feeling.

Nevyn

Even if it is your second it is still a huge change as you now how an infant and a 5 year old to juggle.

Yes, the key is being confident in yourself and in treating yourself better and eating better which will make you feel better and give you more engery so you can go for a walk/swim or get on the excerise bike ect. All easier said then done, I know but make one change a day and you will see the difference. The Deit and nutrition forum has lots of useful stuff in it.

Kazobel

OK I got a banning from the LGB forum for this same argument but I'm sorry it applies here too, "Be proud"? but be proud of what? pride comes from an achievement, something you've worked towards so unless you delibrately ate 10 pound of ice cream to become a size 16/18/20 you didn't achieve it, it's like saying be proud because you have black hair, you didn't achieve it, you were born with it. Now look, all this "be proud" sh*t is just that, Ophra/Ricki Lake sh*t. Fcuk being proud, be proud because your kid got 9 honours in his/her leaving cert, be proud because your 1 year old said her first words, be proud because you managed to get the house cleaned, the laundry and ironing done and dinner cooked and somehow still managed to have 20 minutes at the end of the day to yourself but admit that all you are with your weight is happy, if you're content in your weight then there's no need for a thread like this, there's no need for a declaration. The sheer act of creating the thread proves that there's no pride otherwise there'd be no need for that acceptance from others. Look so what if you're size 14/16/18/20/22...etc as long as you're happy who cares but you? honestly the alternative isn't any better, in the last year I've gone from a 12 to an 8 and I feel like sh*t, my body has no shape, I've no arse, my face has become sunken and I'd give anything to have curves like yous but right now weight is just dropping off me and no one knows why and finding clothes is near impossible. Being a size zero isn't a male ideal, it's a female ideal, no girl does that to themselves because they think they'll look better to men, they do it to compete with other women but the women they are competing with also have the delusion that that's what men are looking for too but men aren't, men like hips, men like arses, men like tits. I'd bet any amount of money that in a night club the size 14/16 girl gets more chat ups than the stick insect. Forget the pride sh*t just be happy and love yourself and no matter what weight you are then you'll always look hot .

LadyJ

iMax wrote: »

A personal bugbear of mine is the use of the words "Plus Sized", "Big Boned" & "Large". It's fat. Plain and simple. Don't wanna be fat? eat less & exercise more.

Plus size models can be as small as size 12 AFAIK. I'm a size 12 and not a bit over weight. I'm 5'10" and have wide hips. I have plenty of pics up around the place so you can judge for yourselves. Plus sized I may be but fat I am not.

minidazzler

In my opinion If a girl is big I would be much more attracted if she either
a) Is comfortable in herself.
b) Is working on it if she is not comfortable in herself.


I will not be attracted if:
a) She is not comfortable in herself and does nothing to try and make herself comfortable.
b) She is not comfortable and complains about it and then does nothing about it.

I like bigger girls, I am attracted sexually to curvy girls, but it's mostly personality with me and if a girl complains to me about their weight and does not TRY to work on it I will not be able to stand them. If she says she's fat and is obviously not even big I will tell her to fck off and stop trying to e a drama queen (If I think they are just trying to get attention.)

Now if a girl complains to me about her weight but then goes on to say oh I go to the gym (and what not) I am totally supportive but I will tell them that they don't need to. Other people's perception of someone shouldn't matter.

Big girls, you are Beautiful.

Jesus Wept

minidazzler wrote: »

Big girls, you are Beautiful.

It can be Sir Mix-a-Lot time now?

MILF

Well it's 9.15 in the morning and last night after I posted I went on the diet and nutrition forum and read through a heap of them. I went to bed motivated. I HAVE lost 4 stone before! So what if I put on a little over a stone while pregnant. I'm not one of these stupid celebs who ping back to size zero 30 minutes after giving birth. I dont have a personal trainer or a gym subscription. I dont have the time to go to the gym with 2 kids. I do, however, now have some ammo and the sheer will to get rid of the stone and 5 lbs I need to get rid of. After reading www.theshapeofamother.com, I know that I'm NEVER gonna change my tummy completely or make it completely flat, like I used to want. The stretch marks and caesarean scars I have tell a story about the 2 pregnancies I've been through and I should learn to love them.
I know I can do it again and I'm gonna post back every once in a while with my progress! I should thank all the men who posted saying that curvy is sexy!

Nevyn

MILF wrote: »

Well it's 9.15 in the morning and last night after I posted I went on the diet and nutrition forum and read through a heap of them. I went to bed motivated. I HAVE lost 4 stone before! So what if I put on a little over a stone while pregnant. I'm not one of these stupid celebs who ping back to size zero 30 minutes after giving birth. I dont have a personal trainer or a gym subscription. I dont have the time to go to the gym with 2 kids. I do, however, now have some ammo and the sheer will to get rid of the stone and 5 lbs I need to get rid of. After reading www.theshapeofamother.com, I know that I'm NEVER gonna change my tummy completely or make it completely flat, like I used to want. The stretch marks and caesarean scars I have tell a story about the 2 pregnancies I've been through and I should learn to love them.
I know I can do it again and I'm gonna post back every once in a while with my progress! I should thank all the men who posted saying that curvy is sexy!

I am so happy for you MILF.

Zee Deveel

Great post, MILF! Great to read so much positivity!

Personally, while I don't think (now) that I'm fat, I've certainly got plenty of curves, and wouldn't be anywhere near comfortable in clothes which showed off my belly/bum. When I was 16/17, and a lot smaller, and was being measured by a friend doing a dressmaking course for my debs dress, she was absolutely shocked that I was a size 14. I'd never thought of 14 as being 'big' until that point. Why the big shock? I've got a pair of hips, dammit! My friend ended up in Hickeys, getting several experienced shop assistants to measure me up, and they were all shocked that I was such a massive size!

I can safely say that yes, I have put on weight since that age, and that yes, I do feel quite self conscious about it on the rare occasion flesh gets flashed, but damn, I'm not fat, and I'm certainly nowhere near obese. I despise the promotion of skinny girls as sexy or ideal shapes. I understand there are plenty of girls that just naturally are that size, and that's cool, variety is the spice of life. I just hate that anything other than that is so often considered so unsexy. Grr!

I'm slowly learning to be proud of myself, and my figure. I'm relatively fit, quite active, and yep, I has curves! It's taken me so so long to get to where I am on that front though.. Fair play for starting this thread, OP, and everyone else with encouraging comments

stovelid

I don't like obesity or haggard, overly skinny women, but there is a world of sizes in between.

Often a 'thin' woman can be gorgeous; often a not-so-thin/'curvy'/'plus size' woman can be gorgeous. I don't really like being pinned down to one definition of what an 'attractive' woman is.

I think a lot of men feel the same way, but feel that they should cheerlead for either side when the debate comes up.

marti101

Jules wrote: »

what do you guys think of the plus size debate?

which is more attractive -



or



We have tried to have many discussion about weight and they generally turn into a bitch fest. We had a great discussion on abortion. So lets try again.

I find there is an awful lot of judging women just because of their size. If you see an plus size person generally people think they are lazy or eats lots etc. Not always the case but can be at times. But if they are happy etc what harm are they doing to others. Why do people have to comment and call names why can't people just accept it?

I dont think the top girl is what id call overweight she actually looks in proportion,the other girl doesnt look that skinny either she looks athletic rather than her ribs sticking out.I say live and let live its nobody elses business.Saying that you would never know they were the same girl.I remember growing up i was so skinny people dont realise it can be hard for extremely skinny women to get clothes to fit properly as they have no hips/arse.Now ive put a bit of weight on as i had baby 5 months ago but what i try to do now is go for a walk every day even only for ten minutes and i make dinner my main meal but the worst thing is sitting in the house bored at least if i was in work i couldnt eat.

Gauge

I don't get why it always has to be either/or, no wonder these threads always end up in a two sided debate- everyone seems to forget that women come in sizes between the extremes.

Jules

This is not about being fat, it is about pride in yourself no matter the size you are. Its about self acceptance and people not judging you on what you look like but for the person that you are on the inside. I look at threads on AH like fat girl not allow into club or some other such crap. And it always ends up in a bunch off assbags feeling the need the make horrid comments about people who are bigger. I want this thread for people who are bigger to be able to come in a talk about their experiences and how they feel. Without worry of stupid comments.

I am a curvy woman and I'm really proud of that fact and while yes big and curvy can be beautiful and women having pride in themselves at that size, I wouldn't say its widely accepted in this day and age with more and more people getting health conscious.

I remember my mother once said to me that in some cases your weight is an influence in whether an employer will hire you as its pride in how you value your health/appearance and that some people will still just be backwards enough to think fat/overweight people are lazy

I think this post summed it up better
http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=55536666&postcount=535

and a picture of these woman




IMO an example of a beautiful women but overweight and not really in proportion and what I would call bad curvy

but there are all types of extremes and society will always judge (especially in AH)

MILF

OMG - how pretty is she in pic two?? I remember why Dawn French dressed like that in pic 3 - she was copying Catherine Zeta Jones and a new look she was sporting and DF decided to copy it! Even with the extra weight, I've often heard how blokes describe her as sexy and also the same goes for Fern Britton.

Yes she is extremely pretty but take a head from an average woman and put it on her body

DJ_Spider

I think 95% of my partners and girlfriends have been larger. I find them more honest and not so hung up on things like 'oooh I can eat that burger I'll get fat' and 'I can't wear that dress, it makes me look bigger' They also have an excellent sense of humour, and of course are much better at cuddles!

Although I must say the current Mrs Spider is trying to lose a few stone, in 6 weeks she lost nearly 2st so not bad. I just support her as much as I can by not scoffing cream cakes and chocolate in front of her! In fact we even bought a treadmill and I am even using it! I have lost a few lbs as well, so it must be rubbing off!

At the end of the day it doesn't matter what you look like on the outside, it's what's inside that counts. You don't eat the wrapper a chocolate comes in do you?

Edit: Dawn French must be good as she married Lenny Henry and have an adopted daughter!

Oh and this says it all!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mdbBSnRxOmE

minidazzler

Zee Deveel wrote: »

Great post, MILF! Great to read so much positivity!

Personally, while I don't think (now) that I'm fat, I've certainly got plenty of curves, and wouldn't be anywhere near comfortable in clothes which showed off my belly/bum. When I was 16/17, and a lot smaller, and was being measured by a friend doing a dressmaking course for my debs dress, she was absolutely shocked that I was a size 14. I'd never thought of 14 as being 'big' until that point. Why the big shock? I've got a pair of hips, dammit! My friend ended up in Hickeys, getting several experienced shop assistants to measure me up, and they were all shocked that I was such a massive size!

I have to say your friend and the Hickeys girls sound like Idiots because:

They didn't think you were that big but as soon as a NUMBER was put on it you were huge. How idiotic can people be?

and IMO 14ish (If I know my sizes well) Is not big just slighty curvy. Hourglassy (Am I right???)

PeakOutput

judge each as it comes i dont know **** about numbers when it comes to size but i know that the skinny pics posted here are not as attractive as the 'plus size' pics

Dragan

Jules wrote: »

Ah just one womans way of facing the every day discrimination that is put up to plus size people.

I have to be honest and say I don't buy this for a second. Everyone, not matter who they are, what size, sex etc will face some form of discrimination….i think more attention is paid to "plus size" because it has turned into a twisted moral issue of health vs choice.

I used to be 300lbs of BAD weight and I honestly can't say I received any more negative comments than I do now that I am a leaner, bigger, "better looking" gym goer.

If anything I receive much more negative reaction from people now than I did then under the same circumstances.

With regard to the whole "acceptance" issue…..find me someone who has never made any judgement on someone else based on appareance and I will allow them that argument. At the end of the day we all have made remarks or comments about how others look at some point in our lives.

dregin

Who cares what anyone thinks about your appearance. The real issue here is your health.

fits

Everyone cares unfortunately.
Appearance is important to everyone (whether they'll admit to it or not) and a lot of women, whether large or not, struggle to come to terms with, accept or even like their own.

Jules

dregin wrote: »

Who cares what anyone thinks about your appearance. The real issue here is your health.

Who says plus sized people are not healthy?