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Just Like That !!!!!

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  • 12-08-2008 1:23pm
    #1
    dak
    Registered Users Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭


    Went to the paper shop - it had blown away.

    I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

    I bought some HP sauce the other day. It's costing me 6p a month for the next 2 years.

    Last night I dreamed I ate a ten-pound marshmallow, and when I woke up the pillow was gone.

    Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.

    A woman told her doctor, 'I've got a bad back. 'The doctor said, 'It's old age. 'The woman said, 'I want a second opinion. 'The doctor says, 'OK. you're ugly as well. '

    'You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine. 'So that was nice.
    '
    A man walked into the doctor's, The doctor said 'I haven't seen you in a long time'
    The man replied, 'I know I've been ill'

    A man walked into the doctor's, he said 'I've hurt my arm in several places'
    The doctor said 'well don't go there any more'

    I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.

    Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners

    'So I got home, and the phone was ringing. I picked it up, and said 'Who's speaking please?'
    And a voice said, 'You are.'

    'So I rang up my local swimming baths. I said ' Is that the local swimming baths?' He said ' It depends where you're calling from.'

    I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'have you got anything for wind' ,
    so he gave me a kite.

    I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for 'flu.
    So I went, and I got it.'

    I was in the attic the other day with the wife. Damp and dusty.........but she's great with the kids!

    I went to the doctors with a jelly stuck in one ear and custard in the other. The doctor asked, 'what seems to be the problem?' I said 'you have to speak up, I'm a trifle deaf.'

    Now, most dentist's chairs go up and down, don't they? The one I was in went back and forwards. I thought ' This is unusual' .
    And the dentist said to me ' Mr Cooper, get out of the filing cabinet. '


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