distressed puppy

Crescent

Hi everyone,

well i have read this thread many a time but not posted. Now it seems I need some sound advice.

We got a puppy on Saturday. She is glued to our feet and anytime one of us leave she gets very distressed (and so do her owners : ) )

I know its very early days but at bedtime she gets extremely distressed. Not wanting to worsen the situation is there anything we can do to help her.

Also, we get up to play with her for an hour and a half before work, we are out from 8.00 to 3.40, but all we have to do is go out of her sight and she seems to be in melt down. Any ideas?

wazzoraybelle

your dog will certainly adapt but it will take some time, I would try to take her for a long walk before you leave to exert the dog so it doesn't c onvert its energy into anxiety, also leaving a radio on may help the dog stay calm. good luck!

Crescent

Thanks for your reply. She has not got all her vacinations yet so we can't take her for a walk, playing out the back at the moment is all we can do.

Another question, would you say leaving her out the back or in the kitchen would be better for her while we are out. We have puppy proofed both just incase. Thank you.

stevoman

Crescent wrote: »

Hi everyone,

well i have read this thread many a time but not posted. Now it seems I need some sound advice.

We got a puppy on Saturday. She is glued to our feet and anytime one of us leave she gets very distressed (and so do her owners : ) )

I know its very early days but at bedtime she gets extremely distressed. Not wanting to worsen the situation is there anything we can do to help her.

Also, we get up to play with her for an hour and a half before work, we are out from 8.00 to 3.40, but all we have to do is go out of her sight and she seems to be in melt down. Any ideas?

put a ticking clock in her bed when its time for sleep or rest and this will replicate the sound of her mothers heartbeat and will calm her a little. also if you can get a blanket and go to where her mother is rub it off her and leave it in her bed and the smell will also give her a calming effect. she is a pup and everything is so new that it will tak her a few weeks to come around and get her confidence up. it all takes time with pups, just like it does with kids.

carwash_2006

It is really important that you don't make a big fuss when you are going, also try and do things you normally only do when you are going at times when you are staying. Usually when people are going out they have a routine, like put on coat, pick up bag etc. This means that the dog learns that when you do these things that means that you are going and they start getting stressed straight away. If you make a big fuss when you are going it will start to cause the same stress factors for them.

Give her an item of clothing that smells like the people that she can cuddle up to, if she's really bad you could make a tape of one of you reading in a very calm way from a book, this can really work to help keep them calm.

Get a kong toy, fill it with treats and give it to her when you are going out. However, it is a good idea to give it to her at other times when you are there too or it will trigger her anxiety when you are going. If she is concentrating on the food in the toy and you slip away quietly without her noticing, hopefully she will busy herself with the toy and when it is empty will be tired and will settle down for a nap.

8.00 till 3.40 is still a really long time for a young puppy to be on it's own, especially one that is showing signs of seperation anxiety at the moment. Is there anyone that could pop by the house during the day and refill the kong, let the pup out and have a good play? If not there is a thing called a kong time that releases filled kongs at intervals, but you would want to make sure it's well out of reach, plus it is not cheap.

Crescent

"8.00 till 3.40 is still a really long time for a young puppy to be on it's own" I agree, but its the best we can do.

We love to walk and she will be going on two walks a day when she has had her final injections, so hopefully that will tire her out a little.

Also now going armed with a list for purchases this lunchtime; a ticking clock etc. :rolleyes:

jenpup

I always give my puppy a treat when I'm leaving or his kong etc etc (pigs ears are great!!)

It's gotten to the stage that he gets excited about me leaving cos he knows he'll get a treat, off he goes when he gets it and complete ignores me leaving!

stevoman

Crescent wrote: »

"8.00 till 3.40 is still a really long time for a young puppy to be on it's own" I agree, but its the best we can do.

We love to walk and she will be going on two walks a day when she has had her final injections, so hopefully that will tire her out a little.

Also now going armed with a list for purchases this lunchtime; a ticking clock etc. :rolleyes:

"technically" its a long time but in this day and age people have to work so i wouldnt worry about it, the pup will learn your working hours and in fairness wont drop dead of lonelyness. just be patient and think logically, for instatnce the first few weeks you walk her she will be terrified, but wouldnt you be too if you were 2 months old, put on a lead and walked by huge, loud, crazy cars. just be patient it take time for all pps to come around and nothing happens overnight. he/she will be a pup for the next 3 years regardless what you think!

wazzoraybelle

What you might also do over the next few days is leave the puppy alone for five minutes, then 10 then fifteen etc etc so the puppy becomes realises its not being abandoned every time you leave.

Crescent

Thank you for all your tips. We are armed with your suggestions, a sacrificed hot water bottle, treats, and a teddy.

Hoping she has a better day today!

peasant

wazzoraybelle wrote: »

leaving a radio on

stevoman wrote: »

put a ticking clock in her bed

carwash_2006 wrote: »

you could make a tape of one of you reading in a very calm way from a book

jenpup wrote: »

(pigs ears are great!!)

I give up ...I really do ...

Honey-ec

Crescent wrote: »

We love to walk and she will be going on two walks a day when she has had her final injections, so hopefully that will tire her out a little.

Just a word of warning - I wouldn't be bringing her on too many walks initially - puppies should only be exercised for 5 minutes a day per month of age, up until about 18 months of age, when their growth plates close.

So, if she's going to be around 12 weeks by the time she gets her second round of vaccinations, you shouldn't be walking her for more than 15 minutes a day.

This only applies to "forced" exercise, by the way. Let her jump around the house and garden as much as she wants to.

peasant

Crescent

What your pup really needs is for you to take at least one week off work, to help it settle into its new environement, to get a head start on the house training, to learn a few basic house rules and to get its 3- 4 feeds a day.
While you're at that you can also start into leaving it alone for ever increasing periods of time so that maybe it will get used to it ...no guarantees though, some dogs never get used to being alone.

stevoman

peasant wrote: »

I give up ...I really do ...

peasant wrote: »

Crescent

What your pup really needs is for you to take at least one week off work, to help it settle into its new environement, to get a head start on the house training, to learn a few basic house rules and to get its 3- 4 feeds a day.
While you're at that you can also start into leaving it alone for ever increasing periods of time so that maybe it will get used to it ...no guarantees though, some dogs never get used to being alone.

get a grip do you really think other peoples suggestion are ridiculous and only your ideas are holier than everyone else or are you really just that ignorant to other peoples views and so pompous??

would it occur to you that maybe people need to keep their holidays for maybe like i dont know, going on holiday. the pup will be fine being left alone during work hours, not the best situation in the world but it will be fine. i work in a vetinary office by the way and i have asked the vets about a ticking clock and a scented blanket and they all unanimously agree that is good approach, but im sure you would know more than a qualified vet :rolleyes:

OP - the pup will be fine, just spend as much time in the evenings bonding with it, respect it and love it and everything else will fall into place.

peasant

stevoman
That's rubbish and you know it.

A pup of 8 - 12 weeks (we don't know exactly how old it is) has about the mental and physical abilities of a one year old human child ...and about the same potential for desaster.

It is simply irresponsible to leave such a young pup alone all day and to expect that everything wil be alright.

Ideally nobody in the OP's situation would get a pup, but the deed is done. The least the OP can do is take a few days off to give the pup a fighting chance at settling in.

Just because you (and seemingly half the country) abondon their pups doesn't make it right, or those ridiculous tips like clocks, radios and tapes any better.

As for vets ... most vets know animals from the inside only. (you wouldn't ask a pediatrician how to raise your child or a gynecologist what to get for your wifes' birthday, would you )

stevoman

peasant wrote: »

stevoman
That's rubbish and you know it.

A pup of 8 - 12 weeks (we don't know exactly how old it is) has about the mental and physical abilities of a one year old human child ...and about the same potential for desaster.

It is simply irresponsible to leave such a young pup alone all day and to expect that everything wil be alright.

Ideally nobody in the OP's situation would get a pup, but the deed is done. The least the OP can do is take a few days off to give the pup a fighting chance at settling in.

Just because you (and seemingly half the country) abondon their pups doesn't make it right, or those ridiculous tips like clocks, radios and tapes any better.

As for vets ... most vets know animals from the inside only. (you wouldn't ask a pediatrician how to raise your child or a gynecologist what to get for your wifes' birthday, would you )

there you have it, the professional vets are wrong, half the counrty is wrong and of course your right. yeh :rollseyes:

peasant

stevoman wrote: »

there you have it, the professional vets are wrong, half the counrty is wrong and if course your right. yeh :rolleyes:

yepp ...that's about it in a nutshell.

To be honest ...I couldn't give a monkey's how conceited you think I am. There's a right way how to treat a young pup and a wrong way.

The right way does not involve ticking clocks or running radios but physical presence, care and responsibility.

stevoman

peasant wrote: »

yepp ...that's about it in a nutshell.

To be honest ...I couldn't give a monkey's how conceited you think I am. There's a right way how to treat a young pup and a wrong way.

The right way does not involve ticking clocks or running radios but physical presence, care and responsibility.

open a creche for puppies, if half the country is leaving them at home you'l make a killing. :pac:

Sigma Force

Right here's my 2 cents worth.

When our youngest dog was still a young demanding puppy.

I was home all day pretty much all the time save for shopping/school runs/vet trips etc.

It didn't make a blind bit of difference when I come home from shopping the pup would still be clingy. She would cry at night so was crated and the crate put beside the bed this helped.

No matter wether you are at work or at home puppys are clingy full stop, when I come home nowdays (pup is now 5 years old) she says hello but then goes off and does her own thing, the collie (9years old) clings like a leech.

I don't think 8 till before 4 is that long, at the end of the day if people don't earn money they can't afford to keep a dog. Like with parenting you can never be there 27/7 and never get it right all of the time.

If you stay home for a week then go back to work that can leave the pup even more upset all of a sudden you're not there anymore.

The pup will cry wether you go to the loo or go to the shops.

The trick is how to deal with the pup when you are there.

One thing I find did work for me was don't make a fuss of the dog when you come home or when you leave. When you come home wait till the pup calms down and then greet him in your own time. When leaving the dog will see you put your coat on etc and will know you are leaving you don't need to say a word.

The mother fusses over her dog (now 5 yrs as well) when she goes somewhere she tells the dog where she is going and makes a fuss so now the dog sulks straight away, gets up on the bed(even when in other peoples houses) and will sulk like mad, she's so spoilt in general though and gets taken most places and there's someone home most of the time. Sulk little wagon though she is won't even come out and play with my two until about the 3rd day when she stays here.

Puppies or kids if parents don't get out of the house now and then or to work then the puppy or child ends up a clingy little monkey and won't stay with anyone and it can make the parents life a misery.

For now as the pup is still young, just do regular short gentle walks, use puppy kongs or regular kongs if the pup is a bit older while you are away.
Don't make a fuss when you leave or come home. Some animals take a few weeks to settle in.

You might be gone around 7 hours a day but you are there for the other 17 hours more or less. So don't feel too bad. I wouldn't put the pup out though that might make him feel more isolated and frutstrated. It does get easier.

peasant

All pups a re clingy ..that's how they work at that age.
It's an ideal opportunity for the owner to get to know and "read" their pup and for the pup to learn how things work around this new place.
Use the clingynness to introduce the pup to all places and things in the house and outside and make it familiar with all everyday items. At the same time, keep an eye on it and learn to read when it needs to "go" so that house training can start straight away. Also utilise the natural following instinct to teach the most important commands of all: "come"

Now ..the pup whining when being left alone is a different issue and this also needs to be worked on gradually. For nights (for a small pup) the box beside the bed thing is ideal ...the pup is calm and in addition to that, night time potty training is also easily managed without major accidents as the pup will wake you up as it gets restless.

For daytime absences (and be they only a few minutes to start with, getting gradually longer) this is good advice:

Guineapigrescue wrote: »

One thing I find did work for me was don't make a fuss of the dog when you come home or when you leave. When you come home wait till the pup calms down and then greet him in your own time. When leaving the dog will see you put your coat on etc and will know you are leaving you don't need to say a word.

Basically you have the right to come and go as you please and the pup has to learn to live with that (over time). The less fuss is created about leaving the dog (and coming back!) the easier it is for the pup.

Nonetheless, I think it would be preferable to give the pup at least a weeks time to get to know everyone and everything and to have at least a chance to learn the ropes before abandoning it for such a long time.

BlackCat2008

I think your getting good advise from every one here you just need it tied together so here's my version.

Pheasant is right that you should have taken time off to settle the dog in but as you have already started a routine with him stick with it you'll only confuse him if you change it now and routine here is the real word a pup needs routine knowing what to expect will stress him out less.

He's clingy because he's frightened, one minute he had a dotting mother the next he's in a new world, how ever do use the clingyness to your advantage, carry the dog around in your arms and show him the fridge doesn't want to eat him or people on the tv can't get him, introduce him to every thing and as soon as he learns what doesn't hurt you won't hurt him he'll be dying to get out of your arms and do some exploring of his own. Teach him while your carrying him around as well that there are things that he shouldn't be at like the kettle or fire place and show him when you touch them they hurt and say no, let him see you are protecting him from these, it's a great way to start training. Just don't over do it and frighten him to death by screaming at something, do every thing calmly.

Make up a bed for him in the kitchen were no one is aloud to go, make this his space to retreat to when he wants and never invade it. Keep goodies and treats as well as his toys in there so he sees this as a safe place. Leave him in the evenings in it for 15 Min's about twice a day is fine and let him hear you's are only out side the door and will come back to him.

At night I do recommend keeping him in a crate next to the bed and if he crys just say the same words to him night night or time to sleep now, don't use to many words and turn out the light, if he keeps crying hang your arm over the bed and rub his paw till he go's to sleep he'll soon get use to this routine and nearly go in by him self after a while you might even find he'll prefer his own bed in the kitchen better and not want to go up stairs to sleep. If your leaving him to sleep in the kitchen do give him a teddy to sleep with even a hot water bottle and again always use the same words to tell him it's time to sleep leave a lamp on in the kitchen and turn out the main light and if you have to come down to him because he's crying settle him repeat the routine and go back to bed. Leave what ever top you wore that day out side the door not in the bed he needs to think your just out side, he can see your not in his bed.

Out for walks remember your legs are a lot longer than his and if going for walkies means being worn out and left to play catch up all the time he'll stop wanting to go, short walks and an easy pace is best till he grows, you want him to enjoy his walks not fear them.

He will be teething when he's about three months old, you must then start to think baby making strange and every thing you have thought him may now frighten him again, so take it easy and don't force anything, he'll be in pain with his gums and ears and some times this can also hit the nervous system, instead show him you want to nurse him while he feels unwell this will also help you's build a bond of trust as well as grooming is bonding.

Again when you leave for work stick what ever you wore to bed out side the door and get him use to a word like bye bye or see you later, so he knows whats going on.

Remember to learn your dogs behaver and interact with him he'll learn form this that you want to be part of his world and not just him having to learn to be part of your world it's also another way of bonding.

Best of all have fun.

Crescent

A drop of whisky worked in the end only joking!!

We went to the vet last night and she said everything was fine with the dog. She told us not to go down to her in the night and that it will soon stop. We also told her our working ours and what we do with the pup, and she said that was all fine, and it's just going to take a while for her to get used to our routine.

We put a teddy in the bed with her, and that plus her 7 in 1 injection (vet said might make her drowsy) helped her sleep all night last night!!

She was howling when we left for work, but left the radio on and a treat in her bed, so hoping she will learn in time that we will be back for some more play!!

Jules

Fair play to you for taking on a pet, and actually caring about it. You are doing the best you can and you should be commended and not scolded like a young child. Agree with the vet about not giving in when they cry at night, as long as she is somewhere they cannot get into mischief or hurt and has a bed and some newspaper to pee on and something to drink and a teddy bear, with all the dangerous bits cut off, she will be fine. One other piece of advice.. get her insured. There are a far few threads on insurance around here, the search function is your friend.

Oh and PICS please and a name!

bigpinkelephant

BlackCat, I have quoted you here as you have everything summarised
But this applies to what Peasant has been saying also.

BlackCat2008 wrote: »

Pheasant is right that you should have taken time off to settle the dog in but as you have already started a routine with him stick with it you'll only confuse him if you change it now and routine here is the real word a pup needs routine knowing what to expect will stress him out less.

You're right here. I find that one of the most omportant things with training an animal is "Start as you mean to go on". This applies just as much here as it does to teaching a kitten not to claw your feet, teaching a puppy not to jump up. Taking time off work for the first week will make the puppy think that you are going to be home with him all the time. So after all the settling he has done in the house while you are home, everything will suddenly change when you go back to work. You are back to square one!

BlackCat2008 wrote: »

Carry the dog around in your arms and show him the fridge doesn't want to eat him or people on the tv can't get him, introduce him to every thing and as soon as he learns what doesn't hurt you won't hurt him he'll be dying to get out of your arms and do some exploring of his own. Teach him while your carrying him around as well that there are things that he shouldn't be at like the kettle or fire place and show him when you touch them they hurt and say no, let him see you are protecting him from these, it's a great way to start training. Just don't over do it and frighten him to death by screaming at something, do every thing calmly.

While a puppy will need to learn where everything is in his new home, the breeder will hopefully have raised him in the home and he will be used to the washing machine, TV etc already.

BlackCat2008 wrote: »

At night I do recommend keeping him in a crate next to the bed and if he crys just say the same words to him night night or time to sleep now, don't use to many words and turn out the light, if he keeps crying hang your arm over the bed and rub his paw till he go's to sleep...If your leaving him to sleep in the kitchen do give him a teddy to sleep with even a hot water bottle and again always use the same words to tell him it's time to sleep leave a lamp on in the kitchen and turn out the main light and if you have to come down to him because he's crying settle him repeat the routine and go back to bed.

No no no... All you are teaching him here is that if he cries, he will get attention. This can soon turn into constant barking, which will drive your neighbours nuts.
If he isnt going to sleep beside your bed when he is adult then dont let him when he is a pup.

peasant

just a niggely remark on the "starting the routine thing"

The pup arrived Saturday, the first post was made on Monday ...there wasn't any routine to speak of yet anyway. The pup had to go from weekend (where everybody is around and fussing over the new arrival) to working day (where it is alone for hours) with no warning or training. In my opinion a few days of ever longer absences would have helped to make that transition.

and another nigelly remark on where the pup sleeps:
Basically the "start as you mean to continue" advice is sound ...especially when it comes to the rules like no jumping up, no biting, etc.
as for sleeping arrangements .. the box besides the bed is aimed at achiving two things:
- help the pup to overcome the loss of its mother and siblings and bond with its new family
- get night time potty training off to an accident free start, so that doing the business in the house is not an option, even at night.

The pup can then always be moved to its permanent sleeping place, once it sleeps through the night without having to go.

By moving the pup out of sight and earshot from the first night, you may get it used to sleeping there sooner ...but you're also getting it used to soiling inside the house.

Crescent

It didn't, we pretended it was our work days. So we went down and played with her from 6.30 to eight, and my partner and I went into another room and listened to her. We only did it from 8 to 12 though to ease her in at the start.

peasant

Crescent wrote: »

It didn't, we pretended it was our work days. So we went down and played with her from 6.30 to eight, and my partner and I went into another room and listened to her. We only did it from 8 to 12 though to ease her in at the start.

Ahh ...and why didn't you mention that earlier? (and save me the preaching and embarassment )

slumped

peasant wrote: »

yepp ...that's about it in a nutshell.

To be honest ...I couldn't give a monkey's how conceited you think I am. There's a right way how to treat a young pup and a wrong way.

The right way does not involve ticking clocks or running radios but physical presence, care and responsibility.

Only a brief entry into this thread for me, but your cocky, arrogant and 'i'm right, you're all wrong' attitude is an absolute disgrace.

Especially from a Mod. who should be open to various opinions and ideas.

Shame on you.

S

Crescent

sorry should have mentioned that, us newbies eh!!

Jules, I will have a photo up soon, hopefully.

peasant

slumped wrote: »

Only a brief entry into this thread for me, but your cocky, arrogant and 'i'm right, you're all wrong' attitude is an absolute disgrace.

Especially from a Mod. who should be open to various opinions and ideas.

Shame on you.

S

Anything you've got to say on topic as well?
Any alternative suggestions on how to raise a pup?
Anything at all?
No?

Thought not ...

In that case I would suggest (to a fellow moderator) that you confine your personal criticism to PM and don't drag a thread off topic.

Thank you very much

slumped

peasant wrote: »

Anything you've got to say on topic as well?
Any alternative suggestions on how to raise a pup?
Anything at all?
No?

Thought not ...

In that case I would suggest (to a fellow moderator) that you confine your personal criticism to PM and don't drag a thread off topic.

Thank you very much

My advice would be to do the exact opposite of what you say and allow people to use common sense.

Raising a pup is like raising a child. Everyone has their own opinions on how its done, but at the same time everyone else needs to respect other opinions

A PM would not have resolved this issue - my point needed to be made. It's ironic though that you wouldn't respond to my post in a PM but you will criticise me in the forum - hippocritcal as well as condescending.

Lovely.