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Department of Water Resources

  • 29-08-2008 4:44pm
    #1
    coldfire1x
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,354 ✭✭✭


    A Department of Water Resources inspector stopped at a
    rural farm and talked with an old farmer. He told the farmer, 'I need to
    inspect your farm for your water allocation.'

    The old farmer said, 'OK, but don't go in that field over there.'

    The Water Inspector said, ' Look Mister, I have the authority of the
    Provincial Government with me. See this card? This card means I am
    allowed to go WHEREVER I WISH on any agricultural land. No questions
    asked or answered. Have I made myself quite clear? Do you
    understand?'

    The old farmer nodded politely and went about his farm chores.

    Later, the old farmer heard loud screams and saw the Water Inspector running
    for the fence and close behind was the farmer's huge-horned prize bull.
    The bull was gaining on the Water Inspector with every step who was
    clearly terrified, so the old farmer immediately threw down his tools, ran to
    the fence and shouted out ..... 'Your card! Your card! Show him
    your card!'

    Johnny and Susie, each five years old, decided to get married.
    So Johnny went to Susie's dad to ask for her hand in marriage. "Where will you live?" asked Susie's dad, thinking this is cute.

    "Well," said Johnny, "I figured I could just move into Susie's room. It's plenty big for both of us."

    "And how will you live?" "I get $5 a week allowance and Susie gets $5 a week allowance. That should be enough."

    Getting exasperated since Johnny seems to know all the answers, Susie's dad asked, "And what if little ones come along?"

    "Well," said Johnny, "we've been lucky so far."

    A blonde walks past a play park and sees lots of kids running around having a great time but 1 kid left on his own. She thinks this is sad so goes to see him,

    "It is a shame you are here all by yourself when all the other kids are having fun, Why are you standing here all by yourself?"

    "I'm the goalie!"


    A patient complained to his doctor, "I've been to three other doctors and none of them agreed with your diagnosis.

    The doctor calmly replied, "Just wait until the autopsy, then they'll see that I was right."

    Why do women watch porn to the end?

    To see if they get married.


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