New Childcare methods

kelle

Has anybody bought the childcare book by Claire Healy Walls?
With her style of parenting, you're supposed to forget everything Supernanny taught you. For instance, she frowns on any sort of punishment technique like the naughty step. In fact, you're not supposed to criticise your child or punish them when they misbehave! When one child hits another, you're supposed to look after the perpetrator not the victim as the former is the one with the problem!!!! This method is being used in my daughter's creche.
If you have, do you use her style of parenting? What do you think of it? Personally, I feel that if her method is not used properly we will breed a nation of adults who don't know right from wrong! I've been using Supernanny's methods for years and I find them very effective.
I haven't read her book, is it worth buying (not that I'll have much time to read it!). I'm wondering what methods does she have for dealing with a child who misbehaves rather than using the naughty step or taking away privileges?
And how have we all grown up into such a great bunch of adults without these books/methods????

January

It sounds like a complete load of bullcrap. You're not supposed to discipline a child who misbehaves? What are you supposed to do? Ignore it?

I'm not a parent, yet, but I don't think I'll be reading the book somehow.

littlebitdull

Sorry sounds like a load of ... ** to me. I havent read that supernanny stuff but from what i did see of her on the telly its seems to make more sense really.

I cant see how not trying to change a childs bad behavour. I find like the time out idea myself, it also gives me the time to calm down!! I never liked the naughty step/chair as I did not like the child feeling like they were bad. But really once you dont actually call it that and use it as the time out spot what harm.

We would still use time out with our 9 year old, and I guess grounding is sort of like time out....!

deisemum

Sounds like a load of nonsense.

I have found most of what Supernanny recommends to be very effective. David Coleman is very good and a lot of what he recommends is similar to Supernanny.

You wan's book sounds a bit like the legal system pander to the culprit and ignore the victim. I'd hate to see what sort of children her methods produce down the line.

No matter how hard you try not to criticise your child I'm sure most parents have at some stage and have even done so without realising that they did. It must come as a terrible shock to a child who has never encountered criticism either intentionally or unintentionally when they go out into the world and encounter criticism.

lostinnappies

oh my god, what a load of sh£%.:eek:

If you look after the preditor instead of the victim then they are getting the attention they wanted. Bad attention is still attention ... omg i cant believe that people would use that. My favourite child behaviourist is Tracey hogg. She has the same approach as super nanny but in a more gently gently softly approach. Her book baby whisperer is fantastic and i always give it to expecting first time moms. (its a running joke now, people say "i was waiting for my one").

by the way what kind of qualifications does the author have? other then being a montisorrie teacher.

kelle

Glad to know you all think the same as me! I still don't know what her techniques are for dealing with children who misbehave.
Unfortunately, my son saw the heading "NO MORE NAUGHTY STEP" in the Irish Independent supplement this author was interviewed, and a picture of Jo Frost with a big red X across her photo and now he says "Mummy you're not allowed to put me on the naughty step anymore!" I then remind him how I was disciplined as a child (ie, by a slap) and he then agrees the naughty step IS kinder! I find the 1-2-3 Magic very effective too.

SarahMc

I think this method is called unconditional parenting. It smacks of very lazy parenting, and a sure fire way to raise yourself a brat.

I certainly cannot see how this method can work in a creche with a dozen children of the same age, none being taught about consequences for bold or bullying behaviour.

stovelid

If she has any, she should hand over her own kid(s) for independent behavior analysis. I'm not one for overt chastisement, but clearly kids need some kind of correction and boundaries.

SarahMc

And this system does not allow rewards for good behavior either because... well I don't now why, it sounds such a load of crock I never bothered researching further.

Demonique

kelle wrote: »

With her style of parenting, you're supposed to forget everything Supernanny taught you. For instance, she frowns on any sort of punishment technique like the naughty step. In fact, you're not supposed to criticise your child or punish them when they misbehave!

Brilliant! Let's raise the next generation of juvenile delinquents!

Carrigart Exile

SarahMc wrote: »

I think this method is called unconditional parenting. It smacks of very lazy parenting, and a sure fire way to raise yourself a brat.

I certainly cannot see how this method can work in a creche with a dozen children of the same age, none being taught about consequences for bold or bullying behaviour.

I wholeheartedly agree, sound like a book written by an educational psychologist with no children (or one that is in the full time care of a nanny)

kelle

kelle wrote: »

I feel that if her method is not used properly we will breed a nation of adults who don't know right from wrong!

Tbh this sounds similar to the way I was raised.
If anything I was more able to distinguish right from wrong from an early age, because I was encouraged to think about situations for myself. Rather than just adhere to rules.

kelle

Moonbaby wrote: »

Tbh this sounds similar to the way I was raised.
If anything I was more able to distinguish right from wrong from an early age, because I was encouraged to think about situations for myself. Rather than just adhere to rules.

What did your parents do when you misbehaved?

kelle

kelle wrote: »

What did your parents do when you misbehaved?

They explained to me why it wasn't cool.
And asked me to stop.
My mum was actually stricter than usual.

I had an issue with authority when I went to school.
I'm fine if someone is making sense, but if I smell a powertrip I don't take it well.

That might well be my personality though...my siblings didn't have that problem.

stovelid

Moonbaby wrote: »

They explained to me why it wasn't cool.
And asked me to stop.
My mum was actually stricter than usual.

This is corrective though, isn't it? You were shown boundaries and the consequences of your behavior were explained.

stovelid

stovelid wrote: »

This is corrective though, isn't it? You were shown boundaries and the consequences of your behavior were explained.

True but a quick read up on the topic, gives me impression that this is the premise of discipling with unconditional parenting.
Maybe I took it up wrong.