Can you advise on ways of making a new muslim colleague feel welcome?

vibe666

hi guys, first post in here so I should probably say hi first!

Hi!

so, I have a new Muslim colleague at work and am doing my best to make sure he feels welcome as he is the only Muslim in the office, so I wanted to see if there's any tips anyone could give me on how to do a better job of it and how not to put my foot in it with him.

i know it's currently Ramadan and as such during daylight hours he can't eat or drink and will most likely spend quite a bit of time in prayer, but aside from that and being as warm and friendly as I can I'm not sure of the things i should/shouldn't do or say.

so, does anyone have any tips or advice?

i know it might seem silly to people but i just want to make him feel part of the team and not make too much of a fool of myself. he seems like a really nice guy so i just want to do my best and make him feel as welcome as possible, i know Muslims probably get a harder time of things than most and I don't want to be one of those people that makes his life any more difficult than it already is.

Hobbes

Well if it is like the guys in my workplace just be your normal self.

vibe666

good stuff, will do.

fingers crossed that 'some' of the other lads aren't going to be their normal selves TOO much. don't want to scare the poor guy off.

i was reading about Ramadan and noticed there references that start with "the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him)" and assume that the part in brackets is a mark of respect that should be included when referring to him but was wondering if it's something which should always be said this way, or if it's just when his name is written?

i mean if you were talking of him in conversation would you include that last bit whenever his name was mentioned? would it just be the speaker who did this or would anyone involved also do the same?

sorry, just finding it all interesting and wondering stuff.

ChocolateSauce

Don't act differently, that's what. Are you 12? Have you never met someone who isn't a Catholic? No doubt there are plenty of people in your office who aren't Christians, and you don't treat them differently. To treat this Muslim any way other than how you treat everyone else serves to single him out and make him feel different. If he has any cultural sensitivities, he'll surely inform you.

hivizman

vibe666 wrote: »

i was reading about Ramadan and noticed there references that start with "the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him)" and assume that the part in brackets is a mark of respect that should be included when referring to him but was wondering if it's something which should always be said this way, or if it's just when his name is written?

i mean if you were talking of him in conversation would you include that last bit whenever his name was mentioned? would it just be the speaker who did this or would anyone involved also do the same?

There's a Wikipedia article here that discusses the basis for invoking peace and blessings on Muhammad (and indeed on other Prophets). In my experience, the use of such invocations depends very much on context - for example, Muslims writing for what they expect to be mainly Muslim readers will include the invocations, while those writing for mainly non-Muslim readers will not. Similarly for speaking. A nice discussion of this appeared in a book that I have by a Muslim scholar Mahmoud A. El-Gamal Islamic Finance: Law, Economics, and Practice (New York: Cambridge University Press, 2005):

It is customary in Islamic writings to use terms of reverence when significant religious figures are mentioned. For instance, mention of the Prophet is traditionally followed by the phrase "salla Allahu 'alayhi wa sallam" (may God bless him and give him peace), and the mention of his companions is traditionally followed by the phrase "radiya Allahu 'anhu" (may God be pleased with him). However, Western academic writings conventionally eliminate the use of such terms of reverence. Following the latter convention, I shall not use terms of reverence in this book, as non-specialists and non-Muslims may find them distracting. In the meantime, I assure pious readers that I share their respect for all religious figures. I hope that they will not be offended by omission of printed terms of reference, which readers may nonetheless vocalize at their discretion.

I would be surprised if a Muslim expected a non-Muslim to use "terms of reverence", and indeed a few Muslims may actually think that you are "having a laugh" by doing so. I worked once with a devout Christian who always referred to the "Lord Jesus Christ", and he got quite upset when colleagues who were not so devout used this expression, because he thought (probably correctly:)) that he was being teased.

I agree with the other posters that you shouldn't act differently, but there are a couple of things that would be no more than common courtesy. First, if your colleague wants to pray, it would be helpful if he had somewhere clean and quiet for this and that people didn't needlessly disturb him. Secondly, we are now into Ramadan, when many Muslims will be fasting between sunrise and sunset. A lot of people who are fasting get a bit stressed as the day goes on (particularly if they are regular smokers, who are not supposed to smoke during the hours of fasting), so bear that in mind and be patient.

Bottle_of_Smoke

MAybe just ask him about the faith, ramadan, halal, hijab etc... All Muslims I've known liked talking about Islam. He might be wary you're cornering him about accepting responsibility for every Muslim act of terror ever committed so maybe get to know him as a person before discussing it.

And stop ignoring the Protestants!

irishconvert

vibe666 wrote: »

so, does anyone have any tips or advice?

You could see if you can sort out somewhere for him to pray. Two of the five daily prayers will fall during work hours and it would be nice if you could arrange for him to have his breaks then. The prayer should be very quick, no more than 5 minutes. Depending on how religious he is he may be uncomfortable going to the pub, especially as it's ramadan, so drinks after work on Friday will probably be out of the questions for him.

Other than that just be yourself.

P.S. Don't bother with the "peace be upon him" if talking about Prophet Muhammad (PBUH), it will just sound very unnatural.

vibe666

ChocolateSauce wrote: »

Don't act differently, that's what. Are you 12? Have you never met someone who isn't a Catholic? No doubt there are plenty of people in your office who aren't Christians, and you don't treat them differently. To treat this Muslim any way other than how you treat everyone else serves to single him out and make him feel different. If he has any cultural sensitivities, he'll surely inform you.

no, I'm not 12, I've just never worked with or been around someone of the Muslim faith and want to make him feel welcome without putting my foot in it.

for example, because i went to the trouble of finding out it was Ramadan, i didn't put my foot in it dragging him to our canteen.

who knows, maybe he's not sensitive about that kind of thing (and i don't think he is) but i would have expected a little more of a positive reply from you being as I'm actually bothering to find out rather than wading in blind.

thanks to everyone else for their help, tis appreciated.

afaik we only even have a couple of practising Christians in the office (out of 30 odd). I guess the majority of this particular bunch of computer geeks just aren't religiously inclined.

mark_1981

vibe666 wrote: »

no, I'm not 12, I've just never worked with or been around someone of the Muslim faith and want to make him feel welcome without putting my foot in it.

for example, because i went to the trouble of finding out it was Ramadan, i didn't put my foot in it dragging him to our canteen.

who knows, maybe he's not sensitive about that kind of thing (and i don't think he is) but i would have expected a little more of a positive reply from you being as I'm actually bothering to find out rather than wading in blind.

thanks to everyone else for their help, tis appreciated.

afaik we only even have a couple of practising Christians in the office (out of 30 odd). I guess the majority of this particular bunch of computer geeks just aren't religiously inclined.

Hi I think if you treat him in the same manner as you treat your fellow employees it should all be good......on friday afternoons muslims are supposed to go for friday prayers(just like christians are supposed to go to church on a sunday)....he might ask for a longer lunch break on a friday...ofcourse being ramadan at the moment he wont need a longer break since he will just need to pray and not eat lunch...
so if you respect his friday prayer and not force him to drink he would be pretty impressed by your manners....i am assuming that he is a practicing muslim who does actually fast and not drink.....

vibe666

i found him an unused room on friday that can be locked from the inside so he has a bit of privacy when he needs it.

i've chatted with him some more and he seems like a really nice guy and despite my strong atheistic tendancies i'm looking forward to finding out a bit more about Islam. just learning a bit about the meaning of Ramadan has already given me a new found respect for Muslims. it seems to me like it's a very noble thing.

ChocolateSauce

vibe666 wrote: »

i found him an unused room on friday that can be locked from the inside so he has a bit of privacy when he needs it.

i've chatted with him some more and he seems like a really nice guy and despite my strong atheistic tendancies i'm looking forward to finding out a bit more about Islam. just learning a bit about the meaning of Ramadan has already given me a new found respect for Muslims. it seems to me like it's a very noble thing.

My best advice now is to focus on his person, not his religion. I know that if someone in my work place always spoke to me with my militant atheism in mind, I'd get annoyed very quickly. It is only a part of my life, and I'd rather be treated as a whole person than as a deicidest. I'm sure he is the same. You seem to be on the right track, but don't look at him and think "Islam". Find out what else he likes.