Some More Quickies

rocky25

The inventor of the Harley Davidson Motorcycle, Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven.

At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur,

"Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven."

Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said,

"I want to hang out with God."

St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and introduced him to God.

God recognized Arthur and commented,

"Okay, so you were the one who invented motorcycles, eh?!"

Arthur said, "Ya, that was me..."

God commented, "Well, what's the big deal of inventing something that's pretty unstable, makes noise and pollution, and can't run without a road?"

Arthur was apparently embarrassed, but finally spoke,

"Excuse me but aren't you the inventor of woman???"

God said, "Ah, yes."

"Well," said Arthur, "professional to professional,

you have some major design flaws in your invention":

1. there’s too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusion

2. It chatters constantly at high speeds

3. Most of the rear ends are too soft and wobble too much

4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust

5. And the maintenance costs are outrageous!!"

"Hmmmm, you may have some good points there," replied God, "hold on."

God went to his Celestial supercomputer, typed in a few words and waited for the results.

The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it.

"Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed," God said to Arthur,

"but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours."

~~~~~~~~~~~
Beer Warning To All Men

Yesterday, scientists for Health Canada suggested that men should take a look at their beer consumption,
considering the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer.

The theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women.

To test the finding, 100 men were fed 6 pints of beer each.

It was then observed that 100% of the men gained weight,

talked excessively without making sense,

became overly emotional,

couldn't drive,

failed to think rationally,

argued over nothing,

and refused to apologise when wrong.

No further testing is planned.

~~~~~~~

Two men are out just fishing quietly and drinking beer.

Almost silently, so as not to scare the fish, Peter says,

'I think I'm gonna divorce my wife.

She hasn't spoken to me in over 2 months.'

Colin continues slowly sipping his beer then thoughtfully says,

'You better think it over, Pete. Women like that are hard to find.'

~~~~~~~~~~

As a Hillbilly couple walk out of divorce court, the wife is cryin her heart out.

Her husband turns to her and says...


"Fer Pete's sake stop cryin Lilla... yer still my sister."

GAAman

Ha all good rocky esp liked the davidson one!

dh0661

Rocky - I'm getting worried about you - all these quickies cannot be good for you.