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Another elephant joke

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  • 24-09-2008 5:46pm
    #1
    Princess Consuela Bananahammock
    Registered Users Posts: 33,497 ✭✭✭✭


    Usual story, Elephant limping, sits down, thorn in foot.

    A tiny mouse shows up and aids the elephant by giggling the thorn free.

    "Thank you so much!" says the elephant. "How can I replay you?"

    "Well," said the mouse, "you're a gal..."

    "...yeah?"

    "...and I'm a guy..."

    "Yeah."

    "Maybe we could y'know..."

    "Have sex"?

    The mouse smiled and the elephant somhow agreed.

    The elephant is standing waiting for the fun to start when she absently-mindedly takes a step back and stands once again on the thorn.

    "Ouch!"

    "Yeah!" cheers the mouse. "You take it AWLLLLL, bitch!"

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



Comments

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    #2
    LoanShark
    Registered Users Posts: 949 ✭✭✭LoanShark


    Why did the elephant fall out of the tree?


    Because it was dead!!


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    #3
    half pint
    Registered Users Posts: 97 ✭✭half pint


    Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree??

    It was stuck to the first one!!


    Why did the thired elephent fall out of the tree??

    It thought it was a game!! :D


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    #4
    dh0661
    Registered Users Posts: 2,630 ✭✭✭dh0661


    Good one ---- keep them cumming :D


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    #5
    LoanShark
    Registered Users Posts: 949 ✭✭✭LoanShark


    Q: Why do elephants drink so much?

    A: To try to forget


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    #6
    newballsplease
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,751 ✭✭✭newballsplease


    Q. how do you get an elephant in a fridge?
    A. Open up the fridge and put the elephant in,and close the fridge

    Q. how do you get a giraffe in a fridge?
    A. open up the fridge, take out the elephant,put in the giraffe,close the fridge


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    #7
    Mahatma coat
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 6,869 ✭✭✭Mahatma coat


    what do you do if you come across an elephant in the Jungle


    Wipe it off and apologise.

    course there are also the jokes about the
    sheep with no legs or the Epeleptic warthog :D


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    #8
    The Bollox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,372 ✭✭✭The Bollox


    how do you know if there is an elephant in your fridge?
    there'll be footprints in the butter

    how do you know if there are two elephants in your fridge?
    you won't be able to close the door

    how do you know if there are three elephants in your fridge?
    there'll be one very disgruntled elephant in the mini outside beeping the horn


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    #9
    It BeeMee
    Registered Users Posts: 748 ✭✭✭It BeeMee


    Why do ducks have flat feet?
    To stamp out forest fires


    Why do elephants have flat feet?
    To stamp out burning ducks


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    #10
    bottletops
    Closed Accounts Posts: 160 ✭✭bottletops


    half pint wrote: »
    Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree??

    It was stuck to the first one!!


    Why did the thired elephent fall out of the tree??

    It thought it was a game!! :D

    Why did the tree fall down?
    Thought it was an elephant


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    #11
    Fratton Fred
    Closed Accounts Posts: 26,567 ✭✭✭✭Fratton Fred


    how does an elephant hide in a cherry tree
    paints its bollocks red


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    #12
    Plug
    Registered Users Posts: 9,248 ✭✭✭Plug


    Fratton Fred wrote: »
    how does an elephant hide in a cherry tree
    paints its bollocks red
    I would think an elephants bollox is bigger than a cherry:D


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    #13
    Fratton Fred
    Closed Accounts Posts: 26,567 ✭✭✭✭Fratton Fred


    Plug wrote: »
    I would think an elephants bollox is bigger than a cherry:D

    maybe a plum tree then :D

    I can do an impression of an elephant

    *Pulls out lining of pockets and lowers fly*


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    #14
    Blitzkrieger
    Registered Users Posts: 6,660 ✭✭✭Blitzkrieger


    What's grey and if it fell out of a tree would kill you?



    Whats big and grey and comes in gallons?


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    #15
    It BeeMee
    Registered Users Posts: 748 ✭✭✭It BeeMee


    Fratton Fred wrote: »
    how does an elephant hide in a cherry tree
    paints its bollocks red

    What's the loudest sound in the jungle?
    Giraffes chewing cherries


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