Thurs Quickies

rocky25 · 25-09-2008 9:37am #1

These two poor kids go to a birthday party at a rich kid's house.

The kid is so rich that he has his own swimming pool and all the kids go in.

As they're changing afterwards, one of the poor kids says to the other one,

"Did you notice how small the rich kids' penises were?"

"Yeah," says his mate,

"It's probably because they've got toys to play with."

~~~~~~~~~~~

One evening a Husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife,

'Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in 'Slim Fast'.

Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!'

His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go unrewarded.

The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer.

'What the Hell is this?' he said to himself as a little 'dust' cloud appeared when he shook them out.

'Mary', he hollered into the bathroom,

'Why did you put Talcum Powder in my underwear?'

She replied

'It's not talcum powder; it's 'Miracle Grow'!!!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~

A guy is walking along a beach when he comes across a lamp partially buried in the sand.

He picks up the lamp and gives it a rub.

Two blonde genies appear, and they tell him he has been granted three wishes.

The guy makes his three wishes and the blonde genies disappear.

The next thing the guy knows, he's in a bedroom, in a mansion surrounded by 50 beautiful women.

He makes love to all of them and begins to explore the house.

Suddenly he feels something soft under his feet, he looks down and the floor is covered in $100 bills.

Then, there's a knock at the door.

He answers it and standing there are two persons dressed in Ku Klux Klan outfits.

They drag him outside to the nearest tree, throw a rope over a limb and hang him by the neck until he's dead.

As the Klansmen are walking away, they remove their hoods; it's the two blonde genies.

One blonde genie says to the other one, 'I can understand the first wish having all these beautiful women in a big mansion to make love to.

I can also understand him wanting to be a millionaire.
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But, why he wanted to be hung like a black man is beyond me.

The Bollox · 25-09-2008 9:51am

the last one was great

Stabshauptmann · 25-09-2008 10:53am

I remember back in the day of a scare at bed time Podge and Rodge told a more PC version of the last one with a horse, I guess there are some things not even they were brave enough to do