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Do you want to be married?

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  • 27-09-2008 5:54pm
    #1
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭


    I think a lot of guys would say that almost all women want to get married at some stage. However more and more people are living together as long term partners without even considering it. What are the ladies thoughts? Is it something you would like to happen? Is it for romance, faith, because its the done thing, tax reasons, or something else? Semi-separate question, would you propose?

    Do you want to be married at some stage 141 votes

    Yes I've always dreamed of it
    0% 0 votes
    Yes if the right man/woman came along
    19% 27 votes
    Maybe, but its not something I'm bothered about
    41% 59 votes
    No I couldn't deal with that commitment
    29% 42 votes
    No I want to be able to get out quick if the relationship fails
    4% 6 votes
    I've never thought about it either way
    4% 7 votes


«134

Comments

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    #2
    Peared
    Registered Users Posts: 1,183 ✭✭✭Peared


    Meh.

    Babies - yes definitely.

    Relationship - yep.

    Marriage - not bothered.


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    #3
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    You put babies ahead of relationship? Interesting.


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    #4
    liah
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,750 ✭✭✭liah


    I don't ever, ever want kids.

    I'm indifferent to marriage. I don't think I could be bothered, personally, I'm not one of those girls who always dreamed about her wedding day or any of that bull****.

    Just don't see a reason, personally.


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    #5
    445279.ie
    Registered Users Posts: 9,978 ✭✭✭445279.ie


    liah wrote: »
    I don't ever, ever want kids.

    I'm indifferent to marriage. I don't think I could be bothered, personally, I'm not one of those girls who always dreamed about her wedding day or any of that bull****.

    Just don't see a reason, personally.

    +1 on all areas :D


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    #6
    F.A.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 327 ✭✭F.A.


    I am not pushed about the 'romantic' side of it. What is romantic about it? Proposal and wedding I sort of get (even though I hate the prospect of a wedding myself), but marriage itself? I don't get it. I actually sort of dread the idea of being married as it feels as if you don't need to make an effort any more in terms of romance...

    If I ever get married it will because of legal advantages. You know, save tax money, facilitate this, that, and the other.


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    #7
    Peared
    Registered Users Posts: 1,183 ✭✭✭Peared


    That wasn't intentional.

    I could feel fulfilled without a relationship but not without babies so maybe there's something there.


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    #8
    SunnyP
    Closed Accounts Posts: 110 ✭✭SunnyP


    I think I would like to be married someday but its not high on the list of priorities, some of my friends are obsessed by marriage and cant understand why it doesnt really bother me if I get married or not

    They are constantly asking my bf when will he propose but being honest we are happy as we are.

    And in answer to the OP question yeah if I wanted to get married I would propose to my partner, I dont see a problem with women proposing


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    #9
    Cadyboo
    Registered Users Posts: 1,302 ✭✭✭Cadyboo


    Want the relationship, living together and babies, and maybe someday to get married. It is not a priority, if you are happy the way things are, why change it!
    And no, I dont think I would propose.


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    #10
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    F.A. wrote: »
    I am not pushed about the 'romantic' side of it. What is romantic about it? Proposal and wedding I sort of get (even though I hate the prospect of a wedding myself), but marriage itself? I don't get it. I actually sort of dread the idea of being married as it feels as if you don't need to make an effort any more in terms of romance...

    If I ever get married it will because of legal advantages. You know, save tax money, facilitate this, that, and the other.

    You don't think two people dedicating themselves to making each other happy is romantic? the joining of two lives? I must be girlier than most of ye ladies. :(


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    #11
    Peared
    Registered Users Posts: 1,183 ✭✭✭Peared


    Slightly off topic but Id love to know the percentage of girls aged late teens/early twenties who say they will never marry or never want children who end up getting married or having children.

    Pretty high methinks.


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    #12
    F.A.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 327 ✭✭F.A.


    brianthebard wrote: »
    You don't think two people dedicating themselves to making each other happy is romantic? the joining of two lives? I must be girlier than most of ye ladies. :(

    Awww, cheer up! I just don't think that marriage is all about two people dedicating themselves to making each other happy. ;) I tend to think it's much more mundane...


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    #13
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    Peared wrote: »
    Slightly off topic but Id love to know the percentage of girls aged late teens/early twenties who say they will never marry or never want children who end up getting married or having children.

    Pretty high methinks.

    Should've made that one of the options, maybe people can add that to their posts when replying?
    F.A. wrote: »
    Awww, cheer up! I just don't think that marriage is all about two people dedicating themselves to making each other happy. ;) I tend to think it's much more mundane...
    Lolz I'm not sad. I realise there are very mundane aspects to marriage, I just think if you do it for the right reasons its a very powerful thing.


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    #14
    rainbow kirby
    Registered Users Posts: 26,928 ✭✭✭✭rainbow kirby


    Peared wrote: »
    Slightly off topic but Id love to know the percentage of girls aged late teens/early twenties who say they will never marry or never want children who end up getting married or having children.

    Pretty high methinks.

    Early-mid 20s here, don't particularly want to marry and definitely don't want kids - and it's *extremely* unlikely that I'll every marry or have kids.


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    #15
    half pint
    Registered Users Posts: 97 ✭✭half pint


    I will never get married!!!

    In this day and age it means nothing... It's only a peice of paper

    Getting married is ment to be about spending the rest of you're life with this one person who you will love forever. But that's not the way it works anymore!!

    Now its oh i might love this guy ok lets get married
    Oh no wait I changed my mind lets get divorced so I can marry him instead

    I beleive in spending the rest of you're life with the person you love but i dont see the need for marrage any more


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    #16
    Pythia
    Registered Users Posts: 7,469 ✭✭✭Pythia


    I do want to get married but I'm not particularly interested in the wedding part.

    Definitely want kids.

    Only 23 though so lots of time...


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    #17
    Piste
    Registered Users Posts: 11,440 ✭✭✭✭Piste


    If I had kids I'd want to get married so the father of the kids would have his fatherly rights, plus inheritence, tax and all that.

    If there were no socio-economic benifits to marriage I don't think I'd bother.


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    #18
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    Piste wrote: »
    If I had kids I'd want to get married so the father of the kids would have his fatherly rights, plus inheritence, tax and all that.

    If there were no socio-economic benifits to marriage I don't think I'd bother.

    That's very fair of you but unfortunately marriage is not sufficient to guarantee fathers rights. :(


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    #19
    Piste
    Registered Users Posts: 11,440 ✭✭✭✭Piste


    Do they not get the same rights as mothers once the couple's married?I always assumed that was the reason my dad married my mum!


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    #20
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    No, mothers has all the rights unless proven hugely beyond doubt that she's unfit. And even then its an uphill struggle for fathers to be recognised by the courts, etc.


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    #21
    Black Swan
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 47,241 CMod ✭✭✭✭Black Swan


    Someday, but not today. I'm having too much fun!


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    #22
    Piste
    Registered Users Posts: 11,440 ✭✭✭✭Piste


    Do you think you'll stop having fun once you're married? :confused:


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    #23
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    Lolz that would be the worst type of marriage!


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    #24
    Phlann
    Users Awaiting Email Confirmation Posts: 827 ✭✭✭Phlann


    Piste wrote: »
    Do you think you'll stop having fun once you're married? :confused:

    Yes.


    Anyway, interesting poll results. Doubt if they'd be reflected in a random poll of women in the street though.


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    #25
    Maple
    Hosted Moderators Posts: 16,186 ✭✭✭✭Maple


    Its not something i'm actively seeking but if i met the right guy i'd like to think that we'd both be brave enough to think balls, sod the statistics and get married. its a scary thought, all that commitment but i hope one day to be brave enough for it.


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    #26
    Crumble Froo
    Registered Users Posts: 8,196 ✭✭✭Crumble Froo


    meh, i think if ill ever be married twill be within the next 6 years, but unlikely. it's so much money and fuss and effort and stuff, and everyone who knows us knows we're mad about each other anyways. i've moved halfway across the globe to be with him, it's not like a gesture after that is gonna show that we're dedicated to each other.


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    #27
    jellie
    Registered Users Posts: 15,503 ✭✭✭✭jellie


    when i was younger (like 13 maybe) getting married seemed like a big romantic fantastic thing. then when i was 15 my parents separated. after that i swore id never get married & probably wouldnt have kids. but in my late teens once i got over the whole parents divorce thing i started thinking a little more rationally about it.

    i would like to get married - if i found the right person. but im more interested in having the right person in my life than the actual marriage bit.


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    #28
    Kinetic^
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,249 ✭✭✭✭Kinetic^


    <
    not currently looking but if ever the current ship fails, no marriage and no kids is what I'm all about. Put your answers on a postcard to Kinetic^, PO Box Jackpot!, Co. Dublin.


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    #29
    Weidii
    Closed Accounts Posts: 842 ✭✭✭Weidii


    Marriage is starting to seem like Valentines day. It's as though the companies are making you feel that it's normal to get married and to have a massive wedding, just so they'll stay in pocket.

    So meh to marriage (but yay to loving, long lasting relationships)


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    #30
    Splendour
    Registered Users Posts: 1,580 ✭✭✭Splendour


    brianthebard wrote: »
    No, mothers has all the rights unless proven hugely beyond doubt that she's unfit. And even then its an uphill struggle for fathers to be recognised by the courts, etc.


    Untrue statement. This I know from personal experience-unfortunately...


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    #31
    Splendour
    Registered Users Posts: 1,580 ✭✭✭Splendour


    half pint wrote: »
    I Getting married is ment to be about spending the rest of you're life with this one person who you will love forever. But that's not the way it works anymore!!

    Why doesn't it work this way anymore though? What has (sadly) changed?!!


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