Fire Safety!

coldfire1x

When the employees of a restaurant attended a fire safety seminar, they watched a fire official demonstrate the proper way to operate an extinguisher.

Pull the pin like a hand grenade," he explained, "then depress the trigger to release the foam."

Later a blonde employee was selected to extinguish a controlled fire in the parking lot. In her nervousness, she forgot to pull the pin.

The instructor hinted, "Like a hand grenade, remember?"

In a burst of confidence she pulled the pin and hurled the extinguisher at the blaze!


Blond customer

A window salesman telephoned his blonde customer.
"Ms. Brown, our company replaced all your windows with triple-glazed models more than a year ago, and we still haven`t received a single payment."
"But,", the blonde protested, "You promised me they would pay for themselves in 12 months."


Psychic counselling

Santa went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I`ve got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I get this weird feeling that there`s somebody under it. I get under the bed, to check it out, but then I think there`s somebody on top of it. I go back and forth, all night long, on top, under, on top, under... You gotta help me, Doc, I`m going crazy!"

"Just put yourself in my hands for two years," said the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I`ll cure your fears."
"How much do you charge?"
"A hundred dollars per visit."
"I`ll sleep on it," said Santa.
Six months later the doctor met Santa on the street.

"Why didn`t you ever come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist.
"For a hundred bucks a visit? A bartender cured me for ten dollars."
"Is that so! How did he do that?"

"He told me to cut the legs off the bed!"